He went through the front door, the people in the hall smiled at him, and he smiled back. He liked this place in the fact that people were used to the fact that he lived there. I was nice to pass people and have them not try to jump his bones. Even the occasional teenage girls that could be found. No, nice wasn't the word for it...refreshing.

He got to the apartment, and looked at the number on the door. 1D. First floor, Apartment D. He could hear the soft sounds of a violin coming through the door, becoming louder when he opened the door. Which meant only one thing. Erin was home.

He followed the melodic notes of the violin playing some classical piece that he wasn't familiar with. He found her in the living room, facing her music stand, her graceful fingers pressing the strings to the neck of the delicate instrument, and then stroking the bow over the strings, creating a note that pierced into JC's very soul and being. Very much the same thing his voice did for her, she had once said when he had tried describing how he felt when he heard her play her violin. She had laughed lightly and said, "It's what I do Josh. I have my violin, it's how I get my voice and opinion and thoughts out to the world. You do that with your voice." Normally, he didn't like it when people called him Josh other than his mother and family, but she said it with such fluid ease that it made all his worries go away and made him want to be with her forever. And he got all that from just the way she called him Josh.

He stood in the doorway, studying her a moment. Her shoulder length brown was put up in one of those claw clips, and he couldn't see them, but he knew her chocolate brown eyes would be filled with passion and intensity. He walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her sides. Her concentration was not interrupted, and she kept playing. He closed his eyes and laid his forehead on the back of her head, and swayed gently to the music of the violin. After about half a minute, she stopped playing and said, "You know Josh, it's very hard for me to play with you swinging me back and forth like that." She turned around in his arms and gave him a kiss.

"I wasn't swinging you. I was swaying," he said. "You-"

"Yeah, I know," she sighed in mock seriousness. "I exaggerate too much," she said as she laid the wooden violin in it's case lined with ruby red velvet. She laid down on the low couch, and yawned. "What'd you do today?" she asked.

He kneeled on the floor next to the couch and carefully lifted the hem of her t-shirt and kissed her stomach. "Work, dance, work, sit-ups, dance, lunch, sit-ups, dance, and work. You?" he asked, softly kissing her stomach again.

She sighed in pleasure and giggled a little, because it tickled. "Get up, take Erika to school, go to class, go to symphony rehearsal, lunch, go to another class, come home and practice, and now I'm here with you...Dammit, Josh, stop that, that tickles."

He looked up at her and gave her a boyish grin. "Nah. I'm trying to find your 'on' switch."

He watched as she carelessly lifted and eyebrow. "Little too much Digital Getdown today?" she asked.

He kissed her stomach again softly, searching her abdomen with his lips. "I wrote that song. What does that tell you?" he grinned slightly.

She smiled sweetly. "It tells me your ready to get it on..." she said.

He looked up, and smiled at her like a teacher might at a student. "Go on," he urged.

"But your just going to have to hold onto the urge for tonight," she said, hopping up and running down the hall to their room, surprising him to the point of falling over and hitting his head on the coffee table. He sat there stunned for a minute, and yelled, "I guess that means that you're not going to be clubbing tonight with me and Joe."

"Nope," she yelled back.

He shook his head again, and got up and walked dazed down the hall, where he found Erin rooting through his side of the medium sized closet. "Er, what are you looking for?" he asked.

"I'm looking for your...ah ha! Here it is!" he heard her say amidst the various articles of clothing hanging in the closet.

She emerged with his gray Adidas sweatshirt. "Here it is."

He rolled his eyes as he took off his watch and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and set both on the dresser. "What is it with you and your fetish of stealing my clothes?" he asked.

"It's not stealing, it's borrowing," she answered. "And besides, I'm cold."

He cockily leaned against the door frame. "And what if I get cold?" he asked.

He pulled off his shoes while she was trying to pull the sweatshirt over her head, but was having difficulty. "You're just gonna have to...hey, where did the head for this thing go?"

He smiled a little as he stepped into the room to give her a little assistance. "Right arm here," he said, holding up the right sleeve, "Left arm here," he said lifting the left sleeve.

"And head here," she finished, poking her head through the appropriate hole. She smiled sheepishly at him after doing so, and he quickly brushed a kiss to the tip of her nose. She grinned. "What is it with you and your fetish of kissing my nose?" she asked.

"Call it a male thing," he said. He tried to move to the lips, but she said, "Josh, I have to go to my parent's tonight," she said.

He practically jumped onto the bed, laying on his side. "Do you wanna take my car?" he asked. "I'm not going to be using it."

She kneeled down beside the bed and shook her head. "No, I need the exercise," she said. "You don't get a lot of that sitting in class and playing violin."

"Just promise me that if it gets late that you'll have your mom or dad bring you home," he said.

She laid her head on his side. "I promise."

They stayed like that for awhile. Until JC was almost asleep, when he said, "I thought you were leaving."

She stood up. "I am. Bye," she said, and left the room.

He smiled after her. She was pulling up the sleeves to the gray sweatshirt to her wrists. She looked so cute. A few minutes later, he heard the door slam, indicating that she had left the apartment. He yawned, and looked at the clock on the dresser. 5:43 P.M. His first thought was to get up and shower so Joey could have a clubbing buddy. Then he thought, Screw it. I'll leave a message on his voice mail, and stay here to SLEEP. He heard a low rumble of thunder in the distance. Maybe I should have insisted that she take the jeep, he thought. Then he shook his head to clear it. It's only a ten minute walk to her parent's house, less than that if she walks along the highway. She'll be okay.

Before the next roll of thunder was to be heard, he was asleep.

Awhile later, JC woke up to a dark apartment. He blearily rubbed his eyes, and looked at the blinking radio/clock. The bright red numbers blinked 5:27 A.M., off, then on, off, on, then he realized what had woken him up. The combination of the shrill ringing of his cell phone, and a powerful thunder clap. He carefully made his way over there, cursing quietly when he stubbed his toe after misjudging the distance between the bed and the dresser. he found the phone there, and still cringing from his mishap, he answered, "Ow...hello?"

"Hi? JC?" a feminine voice asked on the other end.

"Umm, hi...who is this?" he asked, still a little groggy and disorientated.

"This is Erika," she answered.

"Oh, hey Erika, what's up?" he asked, thinking about Erin's little sister. They looked so much alike, no one would ever mistake them for anything but. On the inside, they were as different as the moon and the sun. And if you had to assign one to each, you would give the moon to Erin, because she was quiet, but shone with a light all her own, but never met a stranger. The sun would have gone to Erika hands down, because she was outgoing, and one of the most popular girls in her class, and a partier all the way.

"I'm doing alright, but-" she broke off and JC realized for the first time how much it sounded like she either had been or was crying.

"Ka, what's wrong?" he asked, using her nickname. "Are you in trouble?" he asked.

"No!" she said hurriedly. "I'm perfectly fine, but -- I...I'm at the hospital," she said. "It's... It's Erin."

He felt his stomach turn, and go cold as ice. "Is she okay?" he asked quietly.

"She'll live, if that's what you mean," Erika said and she could her a slight sigh of relief on the other end of the line.

"What else, Ka?" he asked, not knowing if he could bear to hear what would come next. "What time is it?"

"It's like, a quarter after eleven," she said, quickly checking her watch. "Look...someone... someone found Erin along the highway and called an ambulance." JC could hear her voice teetering on the edge of tears. "She was badly bruised, and pretty scratched up," she said. JC could feel his rage being bottled up inside of him, and feel the pressure being built up like the inside of an unopened, shaken soda can. Erika continued, "And when she came into the hospital...they said...there was evidence that she was...sexually assaulted."

Those words hit him like a speeding semi. "Wha...what?" he asked, making sure that his hearing had not failed him.

"Sexually assaulted, JC," she said, about ready to cry. "She was raped."

Again, that speeding semi came speeding by. "What hospital are you at?" he asked, getting up, trying to find his shoes without banging his head on anything, and he found one shoe, then another, and then proceeded to put them on in the dark.

"We're at Mount Mercy," she said. "You know, we've been trying to reach you for a long time. The storm must have knocked down some phone lines or something, because all we get is a busy signal," she babbled. "I was the one who came up with the bright idea of calling your cell phone."

He sighed. Erika didn't babble unless she was really afraid, or really hyper. This time it was the first, he was sure. He held the phone with one hand, while struggling to get his shoe on with the other hand. "That was a good idea, Ka," he said. "I'm coming right now, can you manage to hold down the fort until I get there?" he asked, masking the fear and anger that he really felt. He made his way to the door, managing to get there without running into anything, remembering to grab his keys on the coffee table. It wasn't easy with a dark apartment.

"Yes sir," she said. "The cavalry is on his way."

He smiled slightly at her little joke. "I'll be there in about ten minutes," he said. "Stay strong, Ka," he said, closing the apartment door, and turning the phone off.

But as he walked down the hallway and got into his car, he wondered if he would be able to do the same thing himself in the face of adversity.

JC ran into the emergency room entrance, shaking some of the rain from his hair. He had to park halfway across the large parking lot. Even running as fast as he dared in the rain, it had taken him a little bit, and he was very wet. He saw Erika standing near the entrance against the wall. She looked as she usually did, but with red eyes and slightly disheveled hair. When she saw him, she went up to him, and burst into tears. He wrapped his arms around her and rocked her silently. After a few minutes she had slowed enough to the point where she showed him, sniffling, to the emergency waiting room. There Erin's parents sat, her mother crying into her father's shoulder, while he stroked her hair gently, looking a little red-eyed himself. When they saw that JC had entered the room, the handshakes were forgotten and hugs filled with love, respect, and support were exchanged. They then retreated into their own thoughts and fears and worries. They didn't even notice when the doctor came in.

"Mr. and Mrs. Braack?" he said, catching everyone's attention. "You can see her now," was all he said. "Follow me." They got up and followed, leaving JC and Erika in the otherwise unoccupied room. Erika was curled up in one corner of the medium sized hospital couch, while he was staring at his hands. "That should be me in there," she said, quieter than a whisper.

"What?" he said, lifting his head to look at her.

"That should be me in there, in the hospital bed, stripped of what was most important to her," she choked out. She wiped her eyes. "You know what a partier I am. I go to, like, three every weekend. It could have happened to me more easily than her," she said.

JC turned his body so he was facing her. He talked in a serious tone. "I don't know who did this to Erin, but I was taught to never disrespect anyone like that, especially women. I don't know whose mother and father didn't teach them the difference between right and wrong, but this is just-" his anger caught up with him at that moment, and chose not to continue down that path. "My point is, this shouldn't happen to anyone. So don't go thinking that you deserve to be in there like she is. Okay, Ka?" he said, lifting her chin with his hand.

She looked into his eyes and nodded. "Okay." As if to seal the agreement, they hugged. "I'm just so worried about her," Erika said.

JC smiled a little. "I know, just keep looking up. Things will get better," he said, trying to make himself believe it. About ten minutes later, Erin and Erika's parents came back, and the doctor motioned for one of them to come with him. JC looked at Erika, who shook her head. "You go. I'll go see her next time," she said. He nodded, and stood up, following the doctor. The doctor said nothing, only pointing to the door to Erin's room. JC wondered if he was a mime in his spare time. He was resisting the urge to ask if he could lean against a lamppost, or get trapped in a glass box, when he saw Erin in the bed. She had an IV in her arm, sending chills up and down his back. Her skin was a deathly pale, except for the obvious bruises and scratches, more bruises on her face than anywhere that he could see. And completing the picture, her wrists were tied to the bed with soft cotton clothes.

Tears immediately sprung to his eyes at seeing her that way. So vulnerable and helpless. "Why is she tied to the bed?" he asked of no one in particular.

He practically put a hole in the ceiling when he heard a voice answer him. "When she came in, she had been drugged with a hallucegin, and was hallucinating. She was scratching herself until she bled, and she was being uncooperative towards doctors-" answered a nurse.

JC turned to her, trying to keep his anger under control. "So you strap her to the bed like she's some kind of fucking psycho?" The nurse hesitated. "It was for her own safety as well as the doctor's. We had to sedate her, and should wear off in about twelve hours."

JC sighed. "Whatever. Just...leave us alone, please." The nurse complied, and JC pulled up a chair to the bed. Looking at Erin's bruised face, he wondered, Who would do this to her? Someone as sweet and caring as Erin doesn't deserve this. Brushing his finger carefully along Erin's purple cheek, he said. "Can you hear me, Erin? I love you," he said.

She remained motionless, as did he, except for the tender and loving motion made to her cheek. That same cheek that he had many times kissed, and that she had rested her violin on. He could not believe that this was the same woman that he had been joking and talking with only six hours ago. "I know that you won't wake up for awhile, but when you do wake up, I'm going to be here, okay?" he said. In response, he got the cold, steady beeping of the heart monitor.

There was another dent put in the ceiling when there was an unexpected voice behind him. "You're going to have to leave now. It's late, and the sister still wants to see her," the mime doctor said. JC turned back and looked at Erin again, a ghostly image of what she had been this afternoon. He gave her restrained hand one final squeeze, and left for the waiting room. Upon his arrival, he found that Erika had fallen asleep on the hard, vinyl couch. She's not going to be seeing Erin tonight, he thought. It's probably best that she doesn't see Erin like that anyways.

Erin's father cleared his throat, snapping JC to attention. He looked at the older man, worn down not only by years, but by the current disaster. "I hate to ask, but -- can you take Erika to our house? She needs a good night's sleep, and she can't get that here," he said.

JC yawned. "No problem. Regrettably, I have to go to practice in the morning. I'll drop her off on the way," he said. He leaned over and shook Erika's shoulder gently. "Ka? Ka, we're going home," he said. She sleepily opened her eyes and stretched. She willingly got up and allowed herself to be led out to the car by JC. She got in the passenger's seat, and buckled the seat belt while he started the ignition. About halfway home, she spoke for the first time since she woke up. "How did she look?" she asked. JC didn't want to tell her the whole truth, but he couldn't lie to Erika. Nobody could lie to Erika. "She wasn't looking so good," he answered honestly.

"She was that bad?" she asked. She knew that JC would try to keep some of the truth away from her, but he couldn't blame him. He looked upon her as a little sister, and treated her as such. "She was pretty bad," he said. By this time, they were pulling into the driveway and Erika rooted around in her jeans pocket for her house key.

She sat there for a few seconds. "I'm not going to go to school tomorrow," she said. "I want to be there when she wakes up." He nodded slowly. "I can't blame you. Call me when she wakes up. You have my number."

Erika blinked sleepily and nodded. "Yeah. Will do. G'night, JC," she said, opening the door. He didn't leave until she was safe in the door.

When he arrived at the empty apartment, he tried flicking the light switch on and off. To his dismay, they didn't work. He sighed, and pulled his shoes off. As he entered the bedroom, he somehow managed to stub his toe on the door jamb, and he swore openly. Tired, he set the alarm for seven, and the day's events caught up with him. He cried himself to sleep.

The alarm awoke him with a harsh beep beep beep. At seven forty-five. JC was known to sleep through alarms and wake up calls, but this was just ridiculous to him. He showered, dressed, and managed to get to Jive in about twenty minutes, which was phenomenal considering Jive was halfway across town. When he walked into the dance studio, he found everyone else there, waiting. "Sorry I'm late," he mumbled tiredly.

"'S okay. We weren't ready to start anyway," Justin smiled at him. When JC didn't smile back, Justin got concerned. But he didn't have a chance to ask what was wrong, because they started off practice. It wouldn't have taken a rocket scientist to figure out that something was wrong with JC. He was usually on top of things, but now he was unfocused and not able to concentrate. After about forty-five minutes of mishaps, the returning Wade Robinson said, "Let's take a break. Fifteen minutes."

And so word was law. The all grabbed their water bottles, and sat in various corners of the room. JC sat with his elbows propped up on his knees, his head down. Justin sat next to him. "Hey, what's wrong Jace?" he asked, seeing that something was obviously bothering him.

JC lifted his head, and Justin got a look at how tired out he looked. "Erin was raped last night. We don't know by who or anything."

Justin was silent for a minute. "I'm sorry," he finally said.

"There's nothing that you could of done...she wasn't looking too good. I was at the hospital last night. She was all bruised up, and they had her tied to the bed," his voice was cracking towards the end of his statement. "God, it was awful."

"I can imagine..." Justin trailed off.

JC shook his head. "I...I don't know. I have to make a call," he said, grabbing his cell phone from his bag, and going out of the studio into the hallway. Justin watched after him. Man, that is one devastated guy.

"WAZZZUP?!?!" Chris yelled in Justin's ear, causing him to smack Chris very hard. "Oww...what'd you do that for?" he asked.

"Cuz you're being an idiot. Duh," Justin said.

"What's wrong with JC?" Chris asked, dismissing the previous conversation topic.

Justin rested his chin in his hand. "Erin was raped last night, and he was at the hospital. And he's worried, and tired, and God knows what else," he said.

Chris frowned. "Well, that sucks."

"Yeah," Justin agreed.

Meanwhile, out in the hallway, JC was calling Erin's parent's house, where he was sure that Erika was still sleeping. "Come on, answer," he said quietly after about the tenth ring. After the twelfth ring, he heard a sleepy voice say, "Hello?"

"Hello, this is your friendly wake up call," JC said, imitating the perky, annoying voice of hotel desk clerks that he had heard many times before.

"Very funny JC. Are you at practice?" she asked.

"Yeah. What're you doing?" he asked in response.

"Aww, nothing. Just sexing it up-" she stopped short and gave a bitter laugh. "I just said that didn't I?"

"Yep," he answered.

"God, I'm gonna have to have something checked," she sighed. "I'm going to head towards the hospital in about twenty minutes. You'll be the first to know when she wakes up," she said. JC was impressed, she sounded incredibly calm and collected, yet JC knew that she must be wreck inside.

"Alright. See ya later," he said.

One thing Justin noticed about JC was that he wasn't dancing with his usual vigor and hyperness. After the break, he was concentrating a little bit better, but was looking at his phone lying on the floor by his bag. When it finally did ring, he was over there and saying hello before the second ring could finish. He said something, something that Justin couldn't quite understand over the music, but it sounded like, "I'll be right there." He then hung up, and Justin watched him carefully in the full-length wall mirror. JC gathered up his things and ran out of the studio. Justin assumed that it had something to do with Erin.

Wade looked at Justin, because he looked like he knew something. "Why-"

"It was important Wade, just leave it at that," he said, and left it alone.

Pulling his borrowed bucket hat over his forehead, he walked through the hospital doors, looking for Erika. Spying her at the nurse's station, he snuck up behind her and squeezed her ribs. With a squeal, she jumped in the air while JC proceeded to laugh uncontrollably. She smacked him on the shoulder, causing him to sober. "I'm sorry," he said, but of course, he really wasn't. "What's up?" he asked.

Erika sighed. "I don't know. She's awake but she doesn't want to see anybody. Not really," she said.

"Why?" he asked. He was anxious to talk to her, to find out what she was feeling.

Erika shrugged. "I don't know! If I knew, I'd tell you. I think it's just a withdrawl thing..." she wiped her eye. "Oh God, I thought I cried everything out last night," she laughed.

JC smiled. "It's okay. I understand....I'm going to try to talk to her."

Erika shook his hand with mock seriousity. "Good luck. You're going to need it."

He rolled his eyes. "Thanks. I think."

The next two weeks fell into a pattern for Erin and JC. JC's pattern consisted of food, sleep, work, and Erin. Erin's pattern was food, sleep, work, therapy sessions by the hospital psychologist, and JC. She didn't go back to the youth symphony. That was one thing that bothered him. She put her violin before him sometimes. But it was when Erin told him that the psychologist wanted to speak to him was when he freaked out. But he went.

He sat there on the Thursday afternoon, and looked at the lady who sat in the desk across from him. She was about her mid-forties, but looked pleasant enough. "So, Joshua," JC cringed at his full name. She smiled, not noticing his reaction. "Erin's told me a lot about you. From what she says, she cares about you very much," she said with that probably half fake smile on her face. "Tell me about how Erin's behavior has changed since the incident."

Incident. That was one thing that he hadn't heard it called. Situation, "that one time", and other times they avoided calling it anything at all. For the most part, they avoided the situation.

JC thought. There had been many things that had changed. She was not as quick to kiss, quick to hug, quick to be affectionate. And before, she had always taken her half of the bed out of the middle, causing him to fall out of the bed more times in the past six months than ever before in his twenty-four years. Now, she was always on her side of the bed, staying there. And she wasn't outgoing anymore, she was introverted and quiet, which was almost the exact opposite before. And she hadn't even touched her violin, which kind of scared him.

"Well..." he started. "She isn't as touchy feely, or whatever..." he didn't know why he was suddenly so nervous. Maybe because he had never really talked to anyone else about his relationship with Erin. Or maybe it was just a guy thing. "And...she doesn't play her violin. I know that doesn't really sound like a big thing, but before...you couldn't tear her away from it. She was in a college symphony, and she practiced for hours everyday. And after she...well, you know. She won't even pick it up now, and it's really disturbing," he finished, and the psychologist scribbled something on a clipboard.

"Okay, that's all I need," she said with another fake smile. "Thanks."

JC fake smiled back when she put her head down to write something down and left the room.

At their apartment, the next night, Erin and JC were watching a movie. The Blair Witch Project. JC thought it was kind of lame, but Erin liked it, so live with it and suffer through it. About halfway through, when the one guy disappeared, she just started rolling her neck. "C'mere," he said, pointing to the floor in front of the couch where he was. She wordlessly obeyed, and he started to massage her neck softly. He could feel how tense her muscles were. Except he didn't know if it was because of the stress she felt or the movie. "Relax," he said. "The movie's not that scary."

"It's not that," she murmured.

"What is it?" he asked, hoping he could get something, anything out of her mouth that would indicate how she was feeling. "It's everything," she said, just breaking down, breaking away from his therapeutic touch. "I don't know...it's just everything," she said, the tears gliding down her still pale cheeks. She headed towards the bedroom, and he followed. He found her laying on her side, facing away from the door. He grabbed a few tissues from the box on the dresser, and sat down on the bed next to her. She accepted them, and blew her nose, taking a few deep breaths. He heard her say something, but he couldn't make out what it was so quiet. "What?" he asked gently.

"I thought that if I was brave enough...to pull through that I would stay strong enough to talk when it was all over," she said, using the corner of one of the tissues to wipe her eye. "But I was wrong."

"I'm scared," she said, her eyes reflecting her words. "I'm so scared Josh, I don't even know who that psycho was...some random freak who...God, I don't know. Who knows what kind of diseases he might pass on to me? And it's not like he used protection. Don't you guys keep one in your wallet 'just in case'?" she asked bitterly wiping her tears.

"Um...we're not going to go into that right now, but I think I understand," he said.

"I'm only twenty-three, Josh. That's about eight thousand, four hundred and one days counting leap days," she said.

"How'd you figure that one out?" he wondered, knowing she had a head for numbers, but impressed none the less.

"Josh! That's beside the point," she hiccuped. "I could be pregnant with God-knows-who's child. That," she sniffed, "If my greatest fear out of all of this."

He sat there, quietly, realizing that his sister was right, boys could be very clueless. He should have thought that would be her number one concern. He couldn't think of anything to say, and he wasn't about to start on tired clichés like "Think positive". There wasn't anything positive in this situation to think about in the first place, save that she was breathing. But he brought up the only thing that had made him worry. He pulled her close and whispered into her ear, "Why haven't you picked up your violin?" he asked.

She used the second tissue to wipe her nose. "I know this is going to sound stupid, but...I felt so low, I figured that I didn't deserve the happiness that playing my violin gave me." She looked back down, but before she could move it too far, JC took her head in his hands and brought it up to meet his eyes. "Listen to me," he said. "I love you, and respect you very much for going through this like you did, and handling it this way," he paused. "You deserve some happiness."

She laid there for a minute with him, taking in his words. And then, she got up, and walked out of the room, leaving him in the room. A minute later, he heard the clear beginning note of the violin. He smiled.

No matter what the time, situation, or worries, the violin would play.

1 in 4 girls in the United States is either raped or sexually abused in their lifetime. How many boys do you suppose that is? Or in other countries? That's just not cool. I've never been raped or sexually abused/assaulted, but I know a lot of people who have been. One of my friends was fairly recently raped, and I know about it only because she needed to talk. I was the first one to know besides her and the guy that raped her. I did do some research on this, but the emotions are things that my friend confided in me. I combined my two friend's experiences and made Erin's as real as I could. Thanks for listening.