Chapter 41
She slept so peacefully; he almost hated to wake her. But, it was already late morning and he didn’t want her to waste the day sleeping. He pulled back the sheet to reveal her perfectly alabaster skinned naked form. She slept on her stomach and he watched her back rise and fall with each breath she took. He liked to watch her sleep and he figured she had no idea how often he actually did it. Sometimes he’d wake up in the middle of the night and force his eyes open just to see her breathing softly, her hands tucked beneath her chin when she slept on her side, her hair falling over her eyes.
There was something about her presence that calmed and soothed him. Somehow, she made him think about things in his life other than work, a fact which amazed him. She’d made him rethink his priorities without even trying. He’d never considered the idea before, even when he was married to a woman whom he thought he loved more than life itself; he never stopped thinking about his career. It amazed him all the more because Gen certainly never asked that of him. What was more, he felt so creative around her, and she got his mind thinking in new ways. He knew she thought he was only making a provocative, but empty statement that night when he’d said she was his muse, but he really meant it. He didn’t usually write when he was on the road, but lately, he’d had a burst of inspiration. His feelings for her were so complex and yet so simple that the words came easily to him.
He would do anything to keep her near him and the thought that he would have to put her on a plane to Oklahoma tomorrow night made him miserable. He didn’t want to rush her, but he was really afraid that he was going to; they were going to have to discuss their options very soon. He wanted to see her face when he got up every morning and when he came home in the evening. He wanted to have mundane discussions about buying washing machines or tires for the car. He wanted to decide with her what they would eat for dinner or watch on television at night. He looked forward to picking out Christmas trees and watching fireworks with her. And, though he hated to admit it, he was actually sad to see the results of that test last night. The thought of picking out a crib, planning birthday parties, and wrapping Santa presents in the middle of the night with her had enchanted him. He knew she loved him, he just hoped she felt as passionately as he did because he couldn’t bear to lose her.
He leaned over her sleeping body and kissed her delicately on the back of her neck. She stirred from her sleep. “Johnny, are you up already?” she mumbled groggily.
“Yeah, Gen. It’s almost eleven. The spa’s ready and waiting for ya darlin’,” he smiled.
“Hmm?” she seemed to have forgotten his promise of a day at Spa Rzeznik.
“I was thinking you could use a massage. Relax…get ready for a big evening. We’re havin’ one hell of a party tonight!”
“Yeah? Sounds good to me. Though I’m pretty relaxed already.”
“Hold on. I’ll be right back.” He went back into the bathroom and brought out some soothing aromatherapy candles and a bottle of almond oil. He set them on the nightstand and struck a match.
“Johnny, honey,” she spoke in a sweet, but sleepy voice as she lifted her body from the mattress. “You go first.” She moved from her spot on the bed and switched places with him. She sat astride him and poured the velvety oil on his back. As her hands slid over his body, she smiled at the thought that she must be the luckiest woman in the world right now. She couldn’t imagine anything being better. Before her, beneath her, lay the sweetest, most loving, beautiful man she’d ever met and what made it even more incredible is that he was totally and completely in love with her; as much in love with her as she was with him. She hoped they could find a way to make this work because she didn’t think she could bear living another day the way she had the last two weeks. ‘Better to have never known him, than to have known him and lost him’, she thought.
Her palms worked the oil into the colorful tattoo on his right shoulder and moved down his arm. How many places had she seen photographs of these very arms? They were so strong, so masculine. It was almost unreal that he was here with her and he wasn’t at all the person that the public saw him to be. The world knew the cocky but nice guy rock star, not the shy, unpretentious man laying here. She moved to his left side and rubbed the tension from his left shoulder, moving down to his elbow and to the crimson tattoo of the sacred heart on his forearm. She wondered why a man would want to have that permanently etched into his body. He didn’t strike her as a particularly religious guy, so she really didn’t get it, but found it, like most all his tattoos, appealing nonetheless. Her fingers traveled down to his hands and glided over his calloused fingertips. She was so proud of him. He’d obviously worked very hard to get where he was today and his rough and toughened fingers were proof of his perseverance and determination to achieve the dream that he knew was within his reach. She moved forward and softly massaged his neck and found that he was a little tense, but she thought together they could relax his troubles away, somehow. She bent over to kiss him between his shoulder blades. She loved his shoulders- hell, she loved all of him.
“Gen, darlin’, that feels great,” he mumbled. “But baby, I’m fallin’ asleep. I think we oughta switch places again.”
Though she enjoyed starting her day by fondling his warm, muscular flesh, she reluctantly agreed and traded places once again. He pushed her hair off her shoulders then dribbled the oil on her back as he sat with a leg on each side of her. He tenderly caressed every muscle in her shoulders, back and arms as he kneaded the oil into her skin. She was so soft and pliable in his hands. He loved to feel her, just to touch her sent electrical currents through his body. What was it about this woman that made him feel this way? He wished he understood, because the feelings he had and the intensity with which he felt them, baffled him. Her reflexive sighs as his fingers tangled around her shoulders thrilled him, her soft cries as he worked his way down her legs made him blush. This was a woman who wasn’t at all intimidated by the passions she felt. She willingly shared herself with him and enthusiastically, at that. A woman like her was hard to find. She was comfortable with him any and everywhere. No matter the situation she’d been in, and there’d been some odd ones in the short time he’d known her, she’d always known how to handle herself and had never backed down or shied away. She was bold, fun loving and knew what she wanted. He was particularly pleased that, apparently, she wanted him. He saw how her back arched slightly when he touched her and how her breath caught in her throat, as if wanting more. He was certain that she had no idea how seductive she was, and it was killing him; he couldn’t take it any longer. He leaned down over her tranquil aroused body, “Genevieve...Gen…darlin’,” he whispered in her ear, “Baby, please, I want you. I wanna make love to you.” His voice was breathless and passionate. He took it ever so slowly. Making love to her was an experience to be savored. She was so willing, so passionate. He wanted her completely.
He ran his fingers along her back. When they found their way to her breasts her dewy skin tingled at his touch. When he touched her in more sensitive spots, she thought she would burst with the sensations that erupted from within her. She wanted more, she couldn’t get enough of him. She had one thing on her mind and that was John and what he was doing to her. It was incredible, indescribable. Her muscles tensed, her breathing stopped, and she was suspended, breathlessly, for that short ecstatic moment, when suddenly he joined her, apparently caught in the same rift in time that she was. She felt him twitch as he gasped for breath just before that ultimate groan signaling that he’d reached the same conclusion that she did. Sex between them was astounding. It left both of them relaxed and revived, overjoyed and breathless, and a little tired. He collapsed on the bed beside her.
Gen got her usual peaceful smile on her face; she almost looked drugged. “God, this is gonna be a great day!” She snuggled up to him, feeling his warmth, breathing his scent.
He held her tightly. “It’s certainly starting out like one. God, I love you Genevieve.”
She kissed him squarely on his dimpled chin. “Whaddaya say we take a bath?”
“Not a bad idea.” He ruffled her hair as he got up. “I’m comin’ right back for you, sweetheart. Don’t go anywhere.” Off he went to the bathroom and drew a hot bath. He rummaged through the cabinet and found some bubble bath that one of his sisters had left. It was the good scented stuff from the department store perfume counter. ‘Having your sisters take over your place isn’t always a bad thing, I guess’ he mumbled to himself. He shut off the water and went to collect Gennie. He scooped her up in his arms, “Your bath awaits, madam.”
She loved this special treatment he gave her all the time. He made her feel so valuable, so loved. She smiled sweetly as she put her arms around his neck and kissed him as he carried her into the bathroom. “This is the best spa I’ve ever been to,” she remarked as she leaned against his chest. “Such personal service!”
“That’s how it’s gonna be today. I don’t have to go anywhere until tonight, so you’re all mine,” he grinned. “I’ve got all kinds of, uh, relaxing activities planned for us today,” he remarked with a hint of playfulness.
After the bubbles disappeared and the water cooled, they got out. He offered her the froofy yellow robe hanging behind the door. “It’s ugly, but it’ll do,” he shrugged.
“Ooh!” she cried recalling her shopping trip yesterday. “I bought a new robe! I know you don’t like that one and, frankly, neither do I,” she admitted. She tossed the towel around her still damp body and scurried off to the living room to rustle through the pile of bags. It seems Gen did a little damage at the mall yesterday. She found the bag she was looking for and pulled out a beautiful red silk kimono in a bright Japanese floral print.
He watched her as she rooted through the bags, barely covered by his bath towel, her hair wet and dripping on her soft shoulders, she was so beautiful to him that he almost hated to see her wrap it around her body. “You look gorgeous,” he called from the bedroom doorway. “That’s a very pretty robe. It’s a nice color for you.”
“Thanks! I’m glad you like it.”
“So,” he cozied up behind her, wrapping his arms around her, “Are you hungry? I’ve got fresh fruit.” His voice lowered as his lips pushed the damp hair away from her ear, “It’s juicy…sweet…succulent… and… waiting to be eaten.” He nibbled on her ear a little before taking her hand and leading her to the kitchen. He ducked into the fridge and pulled out a bowl filled with assorted fruit and set it on the counter. It was all there, strawberries, cantaloupe, honeydew, pineapple, cherries, and oranges, all her favorites. She picked up the bowl and headed to the table, when he stopped her. “Oh, let’s not eat there.” He raised an eyebrow suggestively, “How about breakfast in bed?”
“Not a bad idea!” She hurried into their room with her fruit and he followed with another bottle of champagne. She set the bowl in the center of the bed as if they were having a picnic and waited for him to have a seat beside her. She giggled when she saw what he was carrying. “Oh, this is going to be a fun breakfast, isn’t it?”
Relaxing on the bed beside her, he smiled at her with his tempting blue eyes. “That’s the idea. You’re supposed to have fun!” He filled their glasses with champagne and handed her one. “To fate, luck, or MTV, whichever one brought me to you,” he announced, raising his glass. He kissed her gently. “Thank you Gen, for understanding me. For realizing I’m not an asshole even when I act like one and for being everything I could ask for in a woman.”
His loving words brought a tear to her eye. “Thank you for being the one. Now I know what I was holding out for all along. You’ve made me feel things I didn’t know I could feel. You make me feel so loved.”
“You are loved.”
He picked up a strawberry, dipped it in his glass and touched it to her mouth, dragging it along her ruby red lips till they slowly and sensuously parted. He followed that with a piece of cantaloupe, that she devoured with an alluring smile as the juice dribbled down her chin, which he then kissed off of her. Gen reached for a chunk of pineapple and held it up, he leaned his head back as the juice slowly dripped over his lips. She gradually lowered it till it he took it in his mouth. Her fingers were covered in sticky juice though Johnny relieved her of that as he grabbed them and unhurriedly sucked them clean. He placed a piece of honeydew melon between his teeth and held it there for Gen to consume, which she did eagerly. They playfully worked their way through the bowl of fruit and half the champagne. It was one of the most hedonistic meals she’d eaten in a long time. As they lay in bed completely sated and contemplating their next move, the phone rang.
“Whaddaya want?” John griped into the receiver, but with a smile on his face.
“Hey man, it’s me.” It was Robby.
“Dude, what’s goin’ on? Why’re you callin’ me? I’m kinda busy, here.”
“Well, man, if you’re that busy...”
John lit up a cigarette and laughed, “No, it’s ok. What’s up?” He sat up pulling his legs toward him, resting his elbows on his knees.
Gen took this as a sign that he might be on for a while so she put her robe back on and went to stand on the balcony. It was a gorgeous day and she was feeling a little light headed after all the champagne so the fresh air and gentle breeze felt good. She leaned on the railing looking out at her semi-obstructed view of Buffalo. It wasn’t ugly, it just wasn’t what she’d say was a beautiful city, but in late August, the weather was beautiful…especially compared to the scorcher they were having in Oklahoma. Through the open door she heard him chatting away with Robby. They were talking business but having fun doing it. They were really a lot like her and Stacey. The two of them together could be pretty goofy- laughing at things that only they thought were funny. She wished Stacey could be here tonight, if this party was going to be anything like she’d been told, she knew she and Stace would have a blast!
When he finished his conversation with Robby, he tossed on jeans and a t-shirt and dug through his duffle bag, which still sat on his bedroom floor. He pulled out a dark bottle of nail polish. “Gen, darlin’” he yelled to her on the balcony. “I’ll do you if you’ll do me.” He heard her giggle.
“My God! You’re insatiable!”
He walked out standing beside her with a huge grin on his face, shaking his head. “Such a dirty mind…I love that about you, y’know.” He held up the bottle. “This is more what I was thinkin’ though…Sorry to disappoint you.”
“Do I get a manicure and a pedicure?”
“Yeah, of course. Purple even.” He took her hand and led her to a seat on the couch.
“Such a good little rock star you are,” she teased him as he knelt beside her, picking up her feet and sitting them on the coffee table.
He shook the bottle and painstakingly began to draw the paint across the tips of her toes.
She watched him, mesmerized. “You have no idea how sexy you are right now.”
He looked up at her through his dark blond strands of hair and smiled shyly then continued his task. “Gen,” he said, as he carefully pulled the brush along. “You know I really love you, right?”
“Of course, I know. I really love you too.”
“Cause I’ve been thinking, maybe we can make this work, maybe we really can have a relationship. I want us to be together.”
“Yeah? I’d like that.”
“But you’d have to be willing to make some sacrifices, y’know. I don’t wanna screw up your life. I’m not gonna lie to you. It sucks sometimes.”
She smiled, “My life sucks sometimes, too. Everyone’s does. You haven’t cornered the market on that, you know.”
He switched to her other foot. “I know that Gen. But you know what happened last time I tried to have a normal relationship, she was miserable. And I haven’t been able to hold together a successful, meaningful one since all this happened. I don’t know if I can do it, but I wanna try. You make me wanna try. ” He finished with that foot and got up on his knees and kissed her lips. “If you’re willing.”
Gen rested her arms on his shoulders and her forehead against his. “Of course, I’m willing. That’s why I’m here. If I wasn’t willing, I would never have gotten on that plane in the first place. I want to be with you, Johnny. You’ve had me, now you have my heart.”
He smiled lovingly at her then took her hand and resumed painting. “So you really wanna have a go at a jerk like me?”
“With your one, glaring, notable exception,” she rolled her eyes, “no one’s ever treated me so wonderfully. I feel so alive with you. I feel so many things-every emotion in vivid color. I’d be stupid to let you get away.”
“Well, Gen, it isn’t always gonna be like this though. Are ya gonna feel the same way when all we have is a phone call late at night or an occasional weekend rendezvous?”
“As long as I have something to look forward to I’ll make it. It would be better than nothing at all. We can do this, Johnny.”
“I hope so.” He started on her other hand. “It’s really gonna kill me when we’re in Europe in a few weeks. The time difference alone’ll make talkin’ to you more difficult.”
“Just so you’re not an ass again and don’t call me…you can call me anytime, you know.”
“Yeah, but it’ll be tough. It’s different when you’re so far from home.”
“But, Europe’s nice in the fall. I think you’ll survive.”
“Will I get to see you again before I go? I mean, it’s not for like, another month,” he looked at her hopefully.
“You’re gonna have to come see me. I can’t just take off work every time the mood strikes you,” she grinned.
“I’ve got some time off. Maybe I can do that. I don’t think I’ve ever been to Tulsa.”
“Well, you ain’t missin’ much,” she giggled.
“Aw, you’re there. What more is there?” He paused and admired his artistry. “Ok, you’re all done. My turn! Do me, baby!” he chuckled.
“Hands and feet?”
“Eh,” he shrugged, “Why not?”
She leaned forward and started with his fingers. “So tell me about tonight. It’ll be wild, huh?”
He nodded vigorously, “Oh, yeah. Bringin’ down the house. We have a place reserved for the after party. It’ll be too fuckin’ much fun. Everybody’ll be there. Be prepared, it’s a riotous bash alright.”
“Who’s everybody?”
“Oh, man, like everybody,” he grinned excitedly. “Family, friends, people from the old days, some fans we’ve gotten to know over the years, y’know. Everybody.”
“Sounds cool. Are you excited?”
“To be done, or about tonight?”
She moved to his other hand. “Either one.”
“Yeah, I’m excited.” Then he sighed, “But it’s a little sad, y’know. It’s another one under our belt, so that’s good. But,” he took a deep breath, “it’s hard to put it behind you. This album’s been a part of my life for a couple of years now. It’s like…a, a kid, y’know. You don’t wanna just, like, walk away and put it in the past. That’s really hard to do.”
“I can see how that’d be tough.”
“Yeah, I mean, I hate to dwell on the past, but it’s almost like it’s your identity for a while, y’know. It’s like,” he paused to think of the right words. “People know you because of this shit. You live it every fuckin’ day.” He laughed, “It’s kinda like a drug, I guess.”
She smiled when she noticed how hard it was for him to talk without moving his hands. He was so expressive that it was almost like the words came more slowly to him when he wasn’t moving. “So what do you do when you’re finished?”
He laughed. “That’s where my job gets cushy.”
“Cushy?” she giggled.
“Well, it’s not that I don’t have anything to do. But I don’t have a regular job anymore.” He smiled at her. “A tour is about as routine as it can be. The closest to a regular job as it ever gets.”
Gen let out a puff of air and rolled her eyes, “Yeah, right. Like what you’re doin’ tonight is anything like what the guy next door does.” She pulled away from him. “Ok, all done. Gimme those smelly feet.”
He leaned back on the couch, propped up his feet and started blowing on his fingers. Gen figured he was probably glad to get them back. At least now he could talk.
“Well, it’s probably the closest that it comes, y’know. But, yeah, it is weird that it’s also probably the polar opposite at the same time. Quite a contradiction, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. So what do you do when you’re not just an average working stiff like me?” she remarked facetiously.
“We’ll still make some appearances and stuff when we get back from Europe, but not too much. We’ll probably do more of that mini-touring kind of shit when the next single comes out. Do a few festival shows, radio contests here and there. But really, my focus is supposed to be on coming up with new stuff.”
“And I know enough about you to know that it takes you a long time!”
“Aaaah, shuttup,” he poked her shoulder with a still to be painted toe. “It won’t take as long this time, I’m thinkin’.”
“Why’s that?”
“Cause I’ve already got some stuff that I really like.” He sounded really proud of himself. Like this was a rare thing. “Thanks to you!”
“What?”
“Yeah, you’ve really inspired me. So I’ve been writing a lot lately.”
“Cool. So what does this mean for you?”
He smiled at her with his captivating blue eyes. “Means I have more time to live my life and do the things I’ve been wanting to do all along.”