Chapter 47
She wandered around the house, shutting off lights, feeding the cats, her regular nighttime routine. When story time was over, she’d left John sitting on the couch to watch some TV while she tucked the kids in. When she passed through again, he was gone. He must be exploring the new environment, she thought. Turning down the hallway, she found him leaning against the doorframe of her room like he was waiting for her to arrive to take the momentous step. The thought of him waiting for her at all… for anything… made her skin tingle and though he wasn’t doing anything in particular to provoke her, he looked incredibly enticing right now.
“Are they asleep?” he asked in a low quiet voice intended not to wake anyone.
Gen found his sultry voice completely irresistible. She finally had the opportunity to wrap her arms around him. It had been too long since she’d last felt his warm, muscular, manly body close to hers. She nuzzled her face to the side of his neck and breathed in his scent. It wasn’t cologne; maybe it was soap, but she didn’t think so. Whatever it was, she loved the way he smelled. She liked to think it was just him. It was the smell she inhaled upon opening her suitcase when she got home, it was the scent that colored her dreams when they were apart, the one she looked forward to him leaving on her pillow.
“Gen?”
“Um, yeah, they’re sleeping,” she stuttered absently, realizing that she’d been in a dream world just being near him. She willed him to touch her, to speak some more, silently begging him to relieve her of her frustrations.
He squeezed her tightly, pulling her into the room. Even though everything moved at a normal pace, to John, it felt like slow motion; the same way the days passed without her. “Genevieve, I found your surprise.”
She closed her eyes and let the words rush over her. She figured she must have some power over him because he’d done exactly what she was thinking about. She opened her eyes to find him gazing into them. She smiled. “It didn’t really seem appropriate anymore, under the circumstances. A dress like that generally looks best when it’s not over-accessorized with a couple of kids. It stops being sexy then.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Nothing says a woman with kids isn’t sexy. I’ve found you unbelievably provocative tonight.” He kissed her softly and deliberately on the lips. “But now I want you to find my surprise.”
She eyed him possessively. ‘Surprises can wait,’ she thought. Her hands roamed over him, reclaiming her territory. Just having him near her made her feel invincible. Her thumb traced the outline of his lips while her fingers tangled in his hair. She couldn’t wait to reacquaint herself with each and every molecule of his presence, nor he with hers. When she felt his rough hands reach under her shirt, searching for more of her, it was like an electric charge had been set off. She mentally guided his fingers along her frame, as if she were in control of his every move. He seemed to be an enthusiastic supplicant. As he slid off her top and unhooked her bra in a seemingly fluid motion, she gasped, torn between gratifying and being gratified.
“Genevieve, I need you.”
She began to unbutton his shirt, kissing her way down his chest. “You’ve got me, babe. I’m yours,” she mumbled as she kissed a little further. “And you’re mine.” She straightened and peeled the shirt from his shoulders, pressing her naked skin against his. His arms pulled her closer, coming nearer to fulfilling her desire to become completely integrated into his being. She leaned her head back to look in to his eyes and be completely enveloped in his sensuous gaze.
When their eyes met, words could not express the emotions or the undeniable power behind them. His mouth sought out hers to claim the prize previously denied him. It was a kiss fueled by raw passion, eager desperation, and genuine love. Enshrined in her arms and her kiss, he felt that there was nowhere else on earth that could feel this welcoming and secure. It was as if the world made sense to him now. This is what poets wrote about, what wars were fought to defend, and what gave color and meaning to what had up until recently, he realized, been an excruciatingly empty life.
“I’ve been imagining this moment since I said goodbye,” Gen breathed into his ear. “Please, Johnny, make it even more breathtaking than I’d imagined.”
His fingers lightly rolled along her back till they found her skirt, drawing down the zipper and letting it fall to the floor. The expression of sheer abandon on her face thrilled him. Her moist, red lips parted and something about them drove him wild. He stifled her involuntary gasp with a reflexive kiss that even he didn’t expect.
Gen was totally consumed by his kisses. Her hands crept up and down his back, his chest, his sides, feeling him melt beneath her fingertips. She needed more. She needed to be rewarded by his ecstatic pleasure- somehow it had become as important to her as her own. Her roaming fingers found the button on his pants and popped it open. Feeling his eyes on her, she undid them and slowly peeled them off. Something was different. He was watching her, watching her face, not what she was doing. She held his gaze for a moment until his eyes broke away and looked down then back to her as if he wished to lead her somewhere. She licked her lips and smiled to herself; she knew where this was going and it sounded good to her. She closed her eyes and lowered herself to her knees. But instead of doing what she had planned, her fingers rushed to a spot just beside his right hipbone.
“I think you found it.”
“You did this for me?” she wondered aloud with astonishment as she stared gleefully at the small new tattoo.
“Darlin’, of course I did it for you!” he grinned, relieved that she approved of his choice of artwork.
“A spider! You remembered!”
“Genevieve,” he breathed her name. “After that night, how could I possibly forget?”
“Oh John! I love you!” She stood to kiss him, tracing the small figure with her finger. It thrilled her beyond belief that he had etched into his body a souvenir of their night together, one that he would bear for the rest of his life. She hoped it wouldn’t turn out to be a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling. “I hope you never live to regret doing it. It’s gonna last forever you know.”
Her smiled at her, tickled by her inability to comprehend that this was exactly why he’d done it. He glanced quickly at his colorful arms. “You mean I’m stuck with these things forever?”
She giggled and gave him a bright smile. “If you keep doing things like this,” she drawled playfully, “you’ll be stuck with me forever too!”
He subtly raised his eyebrows and smiled back. He knew she was just teasing, but comments from his sisters echoed in his mind- ‘you’ve got the most wonderful girl’, ‘don’t lose her’, ‘she’s not like the others’. They all thought Gen was the one. Hell, he knew she was, but he didn’t know if he was the one for her. “Would that be so bad?”
“You tell me,” she purred before gradually returning to her original position and resuming her plan of attack with renewed enthusiasm.
He owed her everything for the way she regarded him so openly and honestly. It seemed she would do anything for him, and at the moment it made him feel a little guilty. What had he done to deserve her? He’d been completely selfish in this relationship so far and still; here she was entirely focused on his gratification. It wasn’t like she was a pushover though; she stood up for herself, she knew she didn’t need him. She knew very well that he’d been a jerk, but instead of letting him get away with it, or telling him to take a hike, she tried to understand why he did it. She didn’t love him because he was a rock star, but rather, she loved him in spite of it. He was very much aware that if he wanted her love and intended to have it forever, he was going to have to earn it in order to truly deserve it. “Genevieve,” he interrupted, tossing his head back, urging her up to his level.
She paused and stood before him, looking into eyes that appeared to have a depth to them that she’d never noticed before. Was she seeing into his soul or was he seeing into hers? For a split second, the absolute vulnerability petrified her, but she surrendered herself to the feeling and, much to her surprise, found it warm, reassuring and inviting.
“Let me make love to you.”
She opened her mouth to speak but her words were cut short by his finger grazing her lips. He moved her toward the bed, devouring her with kisses- her neck, her shoulders, her breasts. To John it felt more like worship; she was a shrine and he a humble and undeserving pilgrim. Making love to her was like his pilgrimage.
Every sense was heightened in both of them. Something was different about tonight. Gen wondered if it was just because she was home, in her own bed or because something had changed, but she definitely sensed it.
When he’d met his goal of leaving her in breathless elation, John moved over her, caressing her features with his eyes. “I love you, Genevieve, more than words can say.”
She wanted to smile, to tell him she loved him too, but she found that words and actions weren’t necessary. Everything was out in the open, written on her face; she couldn’t hide anything from him now. She could see the devotion in his eyes; this was a different man than she’d been with all the times before. This man showed a passion that burned deeper than the actions of a lustful romp in the sack. They made love, never once taking their eyes off of each other, their hearts, bodies, minds and souls fully exposed to one another.
Afterward, Gen fell asleep in his arms. He wished he could have more time to speak to her, to tell her what he’d been thinking these last few days. But, he knew she had to get up early and get the kids ready. She had to go to work. He hated to admit it, but it annoyed him that she wasn’t able to take the time off to spend with him. And the fact that it annoyed him bothered him even more. He was going to have to try to be as understanding of her 8 to 5 job as she was of his erratic schedule and it’s peculiar demands. Their worlds really were different and he realized he was going to have to work harder at bridging that gap. It was totally unfair of him to expect that she should be the one to have to do all the changing.
From the time he woke up in his bed this morning the phrase ‘this is the first day of the rest of your life’ played endlessly in his head. He wasn’t quite sure why it was there but, for some reason, it just kept dogging him; he figured it had to have some significance. Perhaps now he knew why. He resolved to try to do everything he could to convince her that he was the one for her. She was a pragmatic woman so it was not going to be an easy sell. He knew he held a fascination for her, but he was afraid that it might be nothing more than a passing fancy. He had to try extremely hard not to blow it. It was a challenge to win her heart for more than just the time being- he needed to have her forever.
*******
It seemed like he’d just dozed off when the radio blasted in his ear causing him to startle from his sleep. ‘Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man of wealth and taste…’ Mick’s voice sang from the speaker. He heard Gen groan and her arm reached over him and groggily felt around till it slammed on the snooze button cutting the song short. Her arm retreated and she went back to sleep immediately. Nine minutes later she did the same thing to a different song, and again nine minutes after that. Finally, at 6:45, she rolled out of bed and stumbled wearily into the bathroom, shutting the door and starting the shower. She was evidently not a morning person. The shower dragged on and on till John figured she must have forgotten her extra charges for the morning. He knew that she had to have Megan to school by 8 and he had no idea where that was, so he’d better get them going. He was well aware that Gen wasn’t a big breakfast eater, but Stacey’s kids needed to eat.
He tiptoed into Meggy’s room to wake her, hoping that she would remember him and he wouldn’t scare her. He sat on the bed beside her. “Megan,” he patted her back. “Meggy, honey, you probably need to get up for school now. Gennie is taking a shower so I thought I’d help her get you guys ready.”
The first-graders eyes shot open with surprise. “Hi, Johnny!” she mumbled sleepily, but happily. “Did you spend the night here too?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s neato,” she smiled.
“Yeah, I thought so,” he chuckled. “Listen,” he announced, tousling her hair, “Why don’t you get in the bathroom and brush your teeth, get dressed and do whatever you have to do in the morning, and I’ll go get your brother up and make some breakfast.”
The little girl smiled hugely. “Ok. My stuff is all in my suitcase. I have one too. Just like you!”
“Cool.” He picked up the little pink suitcase off the floor and placed it on the bed so she could get her things out of it.
Next stop was Alex’s room. He walked in trying to sound more chipper than he actually felt so early in the morning. “Hey big guy! You ready to get up?”
Alex stirred in his bed but was unwilling to welcome the day just yet.
“C’mon Alex. It’s morning! Time to get ready for school.”
The toddler finally sat up rubbing his eyes. “I don’t wanna go to school. I wanna stay here and play with you today. We can play trucks.”
“Oh man, I’d really love to, but you know school is really important. I used to have to go to school everyday too!”
“I don’t wanna,” the sleepy boy whined.
“Aw, c’mon. I bet you have fun at school. There’s lots of other kids there for you to play with. We can play trucks later, Ok?”
Alex didn’t look convinced.
“Well, Gennie is in the shower and your sister is in the other bathroom getting ready. Girls!” he shook his head and laughed teasingly to Alex, who amazingly seemed to get the joke and laughed along, rolling his tiny eyes. “So how about we get you dressed before we brush the teeth. Sound like a deal?”
The boy nodded in agreement, but didn’t get up. It was apparent that he was not as much of a self-motivator as his sister.
John grabbed the little red suitcase at the foot of the bed and took out small khaki shorts, a racecar t-shirt and Buzz Lightyear underwear. He helped him out of his Superman persona and eased him into his play clothes. “There ya go, big guy!” he patted him on the backside. “Now you’re Clark Kent!”
Alex just rolled his eyes. Evidently, he wasn’t interested in Superman’s mild mannered alter ego. “I’m hungry.”
“Well, ya know what? I was gonna make breakfast. C’mon, let’s see what Gen has in the kitchen.”
The two guys trekked in Gen’s kitchen. Much to Johnny’s surprise, she kept it pretty well stocked for someone who didn’t like to cook. Alex claimed a seat at the table and switched on the TV while John surveyed the contents of the fridge.
“Whaddaya say, Alex? You like eggs?”
“Uh huh,” came his absent reply. He was a little too wrapped up in the adventures of Bob the Builder right now to really care much about food anymore.
After determining that both Meggy and Alex would eat scrambled eggs and toast. John set about fixing breakfast for the two hungry kiddos. Meggy was more interested in finding out more about John than watching TV with her brother though. She followed him around the kitchen while he searched for utensils, plates and a frying pan.
“What’s that on your arms?” she asked observing him in one of his trademark undershirts.
“What? These pictures?”
“Yeah,” she said touching the one on his forearm with genuine curiosity.
“They’re tattoos.”
“You mean like from Craker Jack’s. I’ve never seen one that big before.”
He smiled, “Well, kinda like Craker Jack tattoos. But these don’t come off. They’re there for good.”
“That doesn’t seem like a very good idea. My dad doesn’t like when I have those Craker Jack ones and he even knows they come off!”
“Well, tattoos on kids are kinda icky.” He made a face to try to convince her of that fact.
As the conversation was getting underway, Gen rushed down the hall. John had been right, she’d forgotten about the kids. She glanced in each room, relived that they’d gotten up. She headed toward the voices coming from her kitchen. When she got to the end of the hall, she stood silently watching as he got the day underway for the kids and now stood frying eggs and conversing with Megan.
“Did your dad get mad at you for doing that?”
He sighed. “Well, no, he didn’t.”
“Really?” Megan was amazed.
“Well, Meggy, he never saw them. He died before I had them.” He wondered if this was more of a conversation than the first grader wanted to have so he left it at that, hoping that it was enough of an explanation.
“Oh,” she replied simply. “That’s sad.”
“Yeah.”
“Hey, guys!” Gen walked in, dressed and ready for work. She put her arms around John and kissed him. “Oh my god! Thank you so much for doing this. I completely forgot.”
“It’s no problem. I kinda thought you did,” he winked. He fixed up plates of eggs for the kids while Meggy pulled toast from the toaster- her contribution to this morning's breakfast. “You want something to eat? I’ve got plenty scrambled eggs. And Meggy is a whiz as a toast chef.”
The impromptu pseudo family ate their breakfast then Gen rounded up the kids to take them to school before heading off to work. She kissed Johnny on her way out the door. “Bye sweetie. I’ll be home as soon as I can. I’m gonna try to sneak out early. Thank you. Really, really thank you for this.” She took a few steps but stopped in the doorway to see him standing there, watching her. “How weird is this?” she asked shaking her head, and then walked out the door.