Interactive Magic 1:
Jeri Ryan/Mismade

As always, feedback is welcomed, as are suggestions for future assistants and illusions.
The public was offered a choice of 4 illusions for Jeri Ryan to assist in as part of an Interactive Magic special. Here's the result...

"Time's up!" Jeri brandished a gold envelope. "You had a choice of four illusions for me to take part in - sawing a woman in half, the sword basket, the zig zag girl or the mismade. Well, the polls are closed, and the results are in." She pulled back the flap, and drew out the card. "The viewers have spoken. The illusion you want me to take part in, with 42% of the vote, is the Mismade!"
"Bit of a turn up," said Jack, shaking his head, "I thought it would be the sawing for sure."
"I guess chopping me in half wasn't enough!" grinned Jeri. "What can you tell me about the mismade? I'd like to know what the audience is getting me into!"
"It's a classic effect, invented by Chuck Jones, in which a beautiful woman - in this case you - is divided into four, yet survives."
"I should hope so!"
"It's been performed by all kinds of famous magicians, and you're not the first celebrity to get involved. Cher actually did this illusion with Mark Wilson." A picture flashed up in the corner of the screen.
"Doesn't seem to have done her any harm. Perhaps this is my ticket to an oscar." Jack tossed the camera a look. "Shall we get started?" The mismade cabinet had been moved into the centre of the stage, its quadripartite door swung open to reveal the matte black interior. "Remind me why I'm doing this?"
"The public have spoken, and we do have to give them what they want." Jack guided her back into the cabinet. "This is Interactive Magic after all" He stepped to the side so the camera could get a clear view of Jeri inside.

"Better wave goodbye." With Jeri waving for the camera, Jack swung the top door over, and latched it shut. He worked his way down; closing the other 3 doors, then reached up and opened a smaller inset panel in the top box. Jeri grinned out. "Yep, Jeri's still there..." Closing up the top box, Jack reached down to the next one, opening a similar inset panel. "And there... and there...*ahem*"
"Hey!" With a muffled giggle from the top of the cabinet, Jeri folded her arms across her breasts. Jack grinned and closed the box up again. On cue, an assistant stepped forward with the first blade. "Ready, Jeri?"
"As I'll ever..."
Jack rammed the blade forward, eliciting a sharp shriek of surprise from within the cabinet. Favouring the camera with an evil grin, he quickly repeated the exercise on the other side. As his two assistants moved in to emplace the remaining blades, Jack moved around to the front of the box and opened the panel in the top box. Jeri seemed to be a little shocked, and more than a unsure.
"Still okay?"
"I guess so..."
"Great!" Jack slammed the panel shut and then worked his way downwards, opening the panels in the sections one after another, demonstrating that Jeri's chest, hips and feet were still in place. Finally, the last divider was driven through and the stack slowly dismantled.

"The most important thing now," said Jack for the camera, "is not to forget which box is which." Behind him the assistants - who were each setting down a piece of the cabinet - exchanged a worried look, quickly switched for a fixed grin as Jack turned back. "Okay, girls?" They nodded. "Great! Let's get Jeri back together."
With his two helpers rebuilding the stack, Jack opened the box at the base to reveal Jeri's feet. He reached in, and raked his fingers over her toes, causing her to pull her foot back. He stood. By now there were three boxes stacked up, and he rose and opened the top one to reveal Jeri's chest, her arms still folded across her bikini clad breasts. He nodded to the camera - so far so good. The fourth box was lifted atop the stack. Jack reached up. Opened the front panel. And groaned.

Instead of Jeri's head, he found her hips, the sarong dangling from the open box. Laughing, he bent down and opened the second box. Jeri grinned out.
"Is it just me, or is the ground a lot nearer?" She giggled, and Jack slowly twisted the cabinet left and right, giving the camera a good view. Setting Jeri face on to the audience again, he knelt down beside her.
"Still feeling okay?"
"I feel as if I've gone to pieces!" she quipped. Jack groaned, and the two assistants winced. "Hey, don't blame me! It was the scriptwriter's idea."
"After that joke, I'm not sure I should put you back together." Jeri began to protest, only to have the panel swung shut in her face. Shaking his head, Jack motioned the stagehands forwards, and they set about unstacking the boxes. They quickly laid the top two boxes on the floor, then Jack removed the one containing Jeri's head to set it on a small stand at the side.
"Still with us, Jeri?" Opening it up, all he got in response was a frown. "Come on, don't be like that. Look, the girls are just getting your body sorted out!" He twisted the stand a little to Jeri's left, so she could see the final box lifted into place. "Okay girls, show Jeri how it went!" With a flourish, they rippled the inset panels open...

It was Jeri's groan. Not a single box was in the right position. Her hips and thighs sat on the floor, and above them her chest, arms still firmly crossed over her breasts, the fingers of one hand drumming on her other arm. Her lower legs and feet completed the set at the top, one foot tapping away.
"They didn't get a single one right!" complained Jeri. The stagehands favoured her with a nasty look. One bent down, and yanked away the sarong, the two girls displaying Jeri's bikini bottoms with another cheesy flourish. "Hey!"
"Don't worry, I'm sure they won't take anything else" Jeri blushed.
"Just hurry up and put me back together!"
"Not a problem. In fact, I won't even have to rearrange everything again." As he spoke, Jack was closing all of the boxes up again.
"What are you doing?" The two girls set about removing the blades that divided the three boxes. "Shouldn't you wait until everything is in the right order?!"
"No need for that." Smiling reassuringly, he struck the side of the stack with his fist. There was a series of loud thumps from within - almost as if a number of large objects had fallen to the ground...
"Jack!" warned Jeri, but the stagehands were already opening the boxes up, revealing Jeri's body, intact, and in order. Leaning on the top, Jack looked down the front of her restored torso, and grinned appreciatively. "I'd say everything was back in place - well, almost everything." He crossed back to Jeri's disembodied head. "One thing missing." said Jack, closing the head box and hiding Jeri from view. He scooped the final section up, and set it atop her restored body. The stagehands each pulled out a blade, letting them clatter to the floor, and then Jack pulled open the final door.

Jeri blinked a few times, and then ran her hands down her front, as if to check everything was back where it should be. Looking up and smiling for the camera, she took Jack's hand and stepped forward to take a bow.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, Jeri Ryan!"