people have visited this page.

And, I have a section on funny Diablo I and II items and monsters here.

::Adam tries on Laquered Plate::
"A uniform fit for a goblin."
- Dave
Comments:
=D


"Send me a flare."
::fires a holy bolt::
- Henry / Ceres
Comments:
=D


"Ah, the Chieftain battle axe. It's so cute!"
- Zach
Comments:
=D


"Ring of Revivification. That's a mouth full."
- Gerdef
Comments:
He found one of those.


"Give me a sword."
"Going on an adventure?"
"Nah, I need some help around the house."
"What?"
"I hurt my leg and I need some help lifting things."
- Zach
Comments:
Zach was generating a conversation and having fun with the idea of an iron golem.


"OH CRAP!! I thought I was only fighting one unique!"
- Ceres
Comments:
That explained why I was losing so horribly.


"Most spiders I've seen wait in their webs for Prey."
"Jaimas, most spiders AREN'T 20 feet long."
- Jaimas / Kevin
Comments:
=D


"Brooke sharpens her weapons on Vile Crow Nests. Or people, if Vile Crow nests aren't handy."
- Jaimas
Comments:
Always keep a monster handy when Brooke's around.


"Run away!!!!"
"You run. I'll fight!"
::Jaimas is hit by Bone Spirit and left with 10 HP::
"NOW I run."
- Adam / Jaimas / Jaimas
Comments:
How many times has this happened to you?


"A_Tree has left the game."
"Riiiiiight."
- The System / Jaimas
Comments:
That would be interesting.


::Watches a Abyss Knight use Bone Armor::
[Jaimas' first glimpse of that spell]
"What's THAT?!"
"Nicotine fit."
::Watches an Oblivion Knight cast Bone Spirit::
[Another first time for Jaimas]
"What the hell is THAT?!"
"Nicotine fit!"
- Jaimas / Mark / Jaimas / Mark
Comments:
That might explain a lot about the knights.


"Cower before my powers of... um... Do I use the powers of light or darkness?"
"A little from column A, a little from column B."
- Ceres as a necromancer / Gerdef
Comments:
=)


"Newton's 3rd law dictates that when a flayer tries to stab you with his knife, he should go flying."
- Gerdef
Comments:
It's true!!


"Are you telling me that you killed Andariel without knowing what skill points are?"
"Yes."
- Ceres / Blake
Comments:
Blake is the coolest newbie I've ever met.


"'ETH TIR RAL' -- Makes an item ethereal."
- Jaimas
Comments:
=)


"I want a unique spoon."
- Adam
Comments:
+40% to eat speed
+ 20 to regain Life
10 Level 13 Life Tap Charges


"I'm coming to get you."
- Brooke
Comments:
With a level 57 amazon, Brooke proves that the old sayings still work.


"Pillage Pillage Pillage!!! Loot Loot Loot!!!!"
- Steven
Comments:
=)


"No one expects the spanish inquisition!"
- Jaimas
Comments:
He was being attacked by Zakarumite Champions.


Brooke - Question Identity.
Jaimas - Question Morality.
Adam - Question Sanity.
Comments:
=)


"Soul Killers - Proof that an enemy doesn't have to be huge to be intimidating."
"Yeah. 'Disturbing' is a FAR better characteristic."
- Brooke / Jaimas
Comments:
=)


"My buddy stopped Smoking."
"When?"
"After about an hour."
- Brooke / Jaimas / Brooke
Comments:
We all know how Brooke loves Firewall...


"I think Brooke signs onto Battle.Net so she can club some guy over the head and drag him back to her cave."
- Dan
Comments:
"ME BROOKE! ME SMASH DAN!" -- Brooke


"You can tell how much damage Baal will do to you by taking your max HP and dividing by one."
- Joe
Comments:
That's true, actually.


"What's the the Tome in Act 2 about? About 296 pages thick!"
- Adam
Comments:
=)


"C'mon, Jaimas! Hit that Fartknocker!!!"
- Mark
Comments:
Jaimas was trying to kill a unique monster that had stone skin and he couldn't quite hit him. Mark walked up and, rather than helping, said this.


"How the hell did you get there?"
- Adam
Comments:
Jaimas had somehow gotten into a room that had no exit as a paladin!


"We have those in Jaime's basement!!!!"
- Adam
Comments:
Adam was talking about sand maggots.


"God joins the game. Diablo's minions grow stronger."
"WTF?!"
- The System / Mark
Comments:
=D


"Jaimas vs. Sandworm. Sandworm wins. Fatality."
- Adam
Comments:
Don't you just hate Hell difficulty.


"Succubi are pretty annoying. They curse you, and have a melee attack now. They kick!"
"How do they melee Attack you?"
"I just told you."
- Kevin / Jaimas / Kevin
Comments:
=)


"I want Farnham's Set. And Farnham's not dead! I have PROOF! Look. You know the skeleton near the rock? WHERE's the mug of ale? That's not Farnham."
- Jaimas
Comments:
A rather clever argument.


"In hell, no one can hear you use the bathroom."
- Dave
Comments:
um,,, ok.


"There's some guy chained to the wall, and he's kicking me." "They do that."
- Jaimas / Bill
Comments:
=)


"My first encounter was a Zombie. Apparently, he was bummed from not being casted in Resident Evil, because he naught hit me once. Surprisingly, this zombie was a rich bastard, and had a whopping 6 gold!!!"
- Jaimas
Comments:
When he had just started playing D2.


"Diablo has joined the game. Diablo's minions grow stronger."
- The System
Comments:
LOL!!


"Of the whale. Of the mammoth. Of the squid?!"
- Gerdef
Comments:
Gerdef was looking at some amulets that I gambled on.


"Can you imagine if Ceres' 'Nobody' Personalizes an item? 'Nobody's Sword.'"
- Kevin
Comments:



"I'm gonna shove a Glacial Spike so far up Baal's ass he's gonna have to have it surgically removed."
- Jen
Comments:
Best of luck on that mission.


::Mark slashes at one of those Poison Spitting Bugs whose name escapes me in act 2::
"C'mon, man. Let's keep going."
"I'm not finished!"
"Yes you are."
::Mark gets spit on by Larva::
"C'mon man, wet pants!"
::Mark gets spit on by 27 Larva and Dies::
"Get up."
"I GOT GREEN SHIT ON ME!!!!! >:-("
- Jaimas / Mark / Jaimas / Mark / Jaimas / Mark
Comments:
=)


"Jaimas, how many oil potions do you have?"
"57."
- Kevin / Jaimas
Comments:
They were about to fight Andariel.


::Mark is hit by a Meteor::
"I EAT THOSE! I EAT THOSE!!!!"
- Mark
Comments:
There's just something about him and eating dangerous projectiles.


"You're trying to do something stupid."
"Like what?"
"Like trying to stick a strangling gas potion in your belt."
"Wouldn't that suck? You make a grab for the Full Rejuventation Potion and grab that instead?"

- Jaimas / Adam / Jaimas / Kevin
Comments:
Yeah, it would suck, but it'd be awesome!


"My stash is empty."
"Yes folks, Jaimas doubles as both a storage device, and a convenient homocidal maniac, should one be required."
- Jaimas / Brooke
Comments:
How convenient!


"What's your set gonna be called?"
"Jaimas's Stuff."
- Kevin / Jaimas
Comments:
=)


"I like Arachs. They remind me of my father."
- Bill
Comments:
Bill is really starting to freak me out.


::Mark is hit by Mephisto's Skull Missile::
"I EAT THOSE!!! I EAT THOSE!!!!"
- Mark
Comments:
I don't see how, but,,,


"hey Jaime. Pull my finger."
::Jaimas pulls Joe's finger::
::Joe uses an Inferno Charge::
- Joe
Comments:
A cruel joke indeed,,,


"SMITE!"
- John
Comments:
He was watching Jaimas Smite things. He's now obsessed with that word.


"Rikisa- Dammit, I can't remember his name. I'll call him Bob."
- Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas was trying to describe Rakanishu.


"MINE'S BIGGER!!!"
- Dan's warcry
Comments:
Mind you, Dan uses the Cranium Basher.


::Joe casts Poison Nova::
"Did you hear that, Terrance? I farted!!!"
"You did?! Just Now?!"
"BWAAHHAHAAH!!!!"
- Joe / Dan / Both
Comments:
=)


"I carry Rares, Uniques, and... Oh yeah! VOLATILE CHEMICALS!!!!"
::Throws Strangling gas potions::
- Adam
Comments:
Adam: Dealer, Visionary, Psychopath.


"Fear my rare, socketed Wirt's Leg."
- John
Comments:
=)


"Rise, Corrupted Rogue. You shall serve a more noble purpose in death."
- Brooke
Comments:
She was playing as a necromancer.


"As a Necromancer, the phrase 'let's make some friends' has a completely different meaning for me."
- Ceres
Comments:
=D


"Aha! I've disappeared from the face of the--"
"I see you!"
- Gerdef / Ceres
Comments:
=D


"Secret room!"
"I don't need no door." ::leaps in through the bars::
- Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
How does he do that!?


"Nobody has joined your world. Diablo's minions grow stronger." "huh?"
- Everyone else's computer / Everyone else.
Comments:
This happens all the time when I join online games.


"I wish the barbarian had a skill of 'leap out of screen and pummel friend.'"
- KC
Comments:
I was annoying him while he was playing D2.


"Why is it I can buy a unique short sword, but not a goddamned long sword? It's act 2 for Christ sake!!!"
- Jaimas
Comments:
I can understand the frustration.


"Remember. When in the desert in Act 2, you can ALWAYS find your way east by staring directly AT the sun."
- Jaimas
Comments:
I think Jaimas had a little sunstroke from being out in the desert with full plate mail on.


"Viva la France!"
"Viva Los Vegas!"
- Gren / Jaimas
Comments:
This was before a duel.


"I'm going to make a sword called 'This Item Sucks.'"
- Dan
Comments:
lol


"They fixed the bug about spells cast while being equiped with a staff of piercing also having the piercing enchantment."
"Shit."
"Lower Resist no longer works on immunities."
"F&^%"
"Cold mastery no longer works on immunities."
"...."
"You don't have any words left to say, do you?"
"I'm running out of bad ones."
- Ceres / Brooke / Ceres / Brooke / Ceres / Brooke / Ceres / Brooke
Comments:
I was telling her all the bad news about the patch at the same time.


"ALL YOUR BASE BELONG TO--" ::Dies::
- Hyperion
Comments:
"Yes, I killed him. He deserved it." -- Jaimas


"Now I know how a marine feels."
- Henry
Comments:
He walked into a room full of Death Maulers.


"WHY WON'T YOU PEOPLE JUST STAY DOWN!?!?"
- Ceres
Comments:
I was fighting Reanimating Hordes.


"Demon, demon, demon, demon, demon, demon, BUNNY~!!!!"
- Rechiru
Comments:
She saw a bunny while I was fighting demons.


"TOO MANY BAALS!!"
- Sam
Comments:
Again, you'd have to fight Baal to get this.


"FIT GOD DAMN YOU, FIT!!!"
- Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas was trying vainly to shove a soulstone into something.


"Ew. Baal puke."
- Ceres
Comments:
You'd have to kill Baal to get this.


"Interesting, I found a HEL rune in Hell difficulty."
- Ceres
Comments:
Weird.


"Fetish - Ancient Word Meaning: 'Annoying'"
- Jaimas
Comments:
He's gotta be right.


"Boi-oi-oi-oi-oi-oi-oing!!!!"
"Shut up, Mark."
- Mark / Adam
Comments:
,,,


"Being slain by an imp is both painful and insulting."
- Ceres
Comments:
It is!


"What does replenish life and replenish mana do?"
"Pretty much what they say."
- Henry / Ceres
Comments:
=D


"That was like Dragon Ball Z!!"
- Ceres
Comments:
I said that after dueling with another sorceress. Both of us used teleport like mad.


"Just let me finish the Arcane Sanctuary real quick."
"THE ARCANE SANCTUARY IS NEVER QUICK!!"
- KC / Charles
Comments:
lol!


"The throwing barbarians got a boof during the expansion."
- Gerdef
Comments:
By "boof," Gerdef meant "boost."


"What the heck? My belt broke!"
- Ceres
Comments:
I hate it when that happens.


"I found an Akaran Rondache. Akaran -- Of or pretaining to Akara. Akara from act 1!!"
- Ceres
Comments:
Why couldn't I get one of those back at the rogue encampment!?


"Dan?"
"What?"
"Stop referring to your Clay Golem as 'The Great Mighty Poo.'"
":("
- Brooke / Dan / Brooke / Dan
Comments:
LOL!!


"It's SO cute!!!"
- Dan
Comments:
Dan meets a yeti.


"Wheeeeeee!!!"
- Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas was knocked FAR away by a Blunderbore


"Talk to the hand!"
- Gerdef
Comments:
He had a skill shrine.


"Don't dolt me! I have skill shrine!"
- Gerdef
Comments:
I called him a dolt and he came back with a skill shrine.


"Jaden is battling the unholy power of windows."
- Ceres
Comments:
Well, he was.


"Right, left, east, or west?"
- Gerdef
Comments:
We were in the arcane sanctuary, but Gerdef wasn't making much sense.


"I need to get to Act 10."
- Gerdef
Comments:
::shrugs::


::sings:: "If I only had a brain..."
- Ceres
Comments:
I was playing Khalim and looking for Khalim's brain.


"Why don't we put a bone helm in there?"
"Uh, bone helms don't look human."
"Riiiight, humans don't have horns, do they?"
- Gerdef / Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
We were discussing whether the set of Khalim's skull should be a bone helm or a flawless skull.


"These people never rest! The closest thing that they get to resting is standing still!"
- Gerdef
Comments:
Gerdef was commenting that his character never sits down.


"Your eye is staring at me!"
- Gerdef
Comments:
One of the many jokes about my paladin, Khalim.


"Duriel? He had no trouble with my barbarian."
- Gerdef
Comments:
What Gerdef meant to say was that his barbarian had no trouble with Duriel.


"Dude! THAT ROCKS!!!"
"What does?"
"You have a LEAPER on your head!!!"
- Mark / Jaimas / Mark
Comments:
Indeed he did.


"OOG SMASH JAIMAS LIKE TINY PUPPY!!!"
"Whatever."
- Oog / Kevin
Comments:
I guess the war cry gets old.


"DUDE!!!"
"What'd I do?"
"You killed Duriel by yourself?!"
"No, he did it."
- Mark / Jaimas / Mark / Jaimas
Comments:
=D


"What the hell!? You just froze my fire golem!!"
- Ceres
Comments:
That shouldn't be possible!


"HA! I'm back! Uh-oh! RUN!!!"
- Ceres
Comments:
That's the way it goes when you're fighting the high council on hell difficulty.


"Rock on a mushroom!"
- KC
Comments:
He was trying to say "Rakanishu"


"Concentration is the key to victory. Albeit I have blessed aim, not concentration, but..."
- Gerdef
Comments:
Gerdef, Zach, and I have the paladin trio. Zach has concentration, Gerdef has blessed aim, and I have defiance. =D


"This bow can hit a foot soldier and pierce his armor at 100 paces."
"And shoots at right angles?"
"This one really does!"
- Zach / Ceres / Zach
Comments:
Zach and I were quoting an old saying about a really good bow and then Zach added a comment about his guided arrow.


"Mephisto! You are nothing but an annoyance!"
- Ceres
Comments:
I said this on Hell difficulty only because I was so pissed at the game crashing 3 times after I killed Mephisto and entered the infernal gate. Now that I'm calm, I'll admit that I was wrong.


"Hahaha!!! Diablo!!! Taste My -"
::Red Lightning Slays Dan::
"Damnit."
- Dan
Comments:
I shouldn't laugh. This happens to me all the time.


"Thrashers aren't as big as they look."
- Aerial Bob
Comments:
He meant "tough."


"I..." ::SMASH!:: "HATE..." ::SMASH!:: "FETISHES!!" ::SMASH! SMASH! SMASH!::
- Charles
Comments:
Don't we all,,,


"That's right, a gem shrine won't work on Mephisto's soulstone."
- Ceres
Comments:
I thought it was a saphire!


"She's a whacking... sorceress...a...whack...a...ress... A whackeress?"
- Daniel
Comments:
Daniel gave Arcana's Deathwand to Sarah and uses it to hit people with. Daniel was trying to classify her character.


[British accent] "Where's my bloody golem?"
- Ceres
Comments:
My Blood Golem ran off without me.


"Interesting, these leapers are jumping in out of a house that has a roof."
- Ceres
Comments:
How do they do that?


"I'm pissed off at Arch-Angel Tyreal! After I killed Diablo, he said, 'Praise be to the light! You have accomplished the impossible!' This means that he knew the mission that he sent me on was impossible to begin with! He sent me on a suicide mission!"
- Ceres
Comments:
::grumbles::


"Wheee! I got speedage!"
::Dan runs out of Stamina::
"K, I'm F^$%ed."
- Dan
Comments:
=D


"It's got fastest hit requirement,,,"
- Ceres
Comments:
I meant that it had fastest hit recovery and lowered requirements.


"Your superior intelect is no match for my puny weapon."
- John
Comments:
John beat a sorceress to death with his Rare Wirt's Leg.


"SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!"
- Adam
Comments:
Adam with a bardiche.


"Coolness should be like money. Like, you should be able to walk to Charsi for a sword, and when she asks how you're paying, you could say "I'm using my coolness."
- Adam
Comments:
,,,


"Hold still. AHHHH!!!! YOU'RE BEING A BAAAAAD MONKEY!!!!"
- Kevin
Comments:
Kevin Chases a Soul Killer.


"Fields can be replanted and settlements rebuilt. Burn it all."
- Kevin
Comments:
Kevin was commenting on Brooke's obsessive use of firewall.


"It's *so* cute!!!"
- John
Comments:
John meets a Yeti.


"AAAHHHHHH!!!! Wait - that's only a fallen. Whew."
- Brooke
Comments:
I'm curious what she thought it was.


"That's more like it. Now I have to flee from monsters."
- Ceres
Comments:
I was commenting on the fact that my barbarian was too powerful.


"DUDE!!! What the hell is wrong with you?!"
"SPEEEEEEEED!!!!"
- Mark / Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas hits a stamina shrine and his stamina was 256 out of 211.


"Go, my beavers! Kill! KILL!!!!"
- Bill
Comments:
Bill reviving Spike Fiends.


"Umm... you called me."
"I did? Oh yeah, I did..."
"What was it about?"
"Sir Khalim."
"Khalim? Sir Khalim?"
"Yes, Sir Khalim."
"SIR KHALIM??!!! ARE YOU INSANE?!!!"
"Possibly."
- Gerdef / Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres
Comments:
Daniel was in shock that I created a character on Saturday and got him up to a Sir by Sunday.


"4 Directions!!! What do we do?"
"I shall consult the magic 8-Ball."
[2 minutes later]
"What does it say?"
"My sources say yes."
"........"
- Me/Adam/Kevin/Adam/Me
Comments:
I never did trust the magic 8-ball.


"Smashy smashy!"
- Zach
Comments:
Zach likes to hit frozen enemies with his staff.


"Things aren't particularly safe, but things are improving."
- Ceres
Comments:
I was trying to clear out an area that Zach was having trouble with.


"You got your stuff back from a suicide run!"
- Zach
Comments:
I did! =D


"You're army of cuteness?"
"Well, the general doesn't have to be like the troops."
- Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
We were discussing Gerdef's idea of reviving an army of rabbits.


"I don't care. We are NOT hiring Dan."
- Adam
Comments:
::shrugs::


"It costs 3K of gold to repair 1 durability."
"Ouch. [pause] OWWWCH! That just sunk in!"
- Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
I have this awesome armor, but it's making me bankrupt!


"I've been training Fletcher."
"WHAT?!"
- Ceres / Lydia
Comments:
I was talking about my Amazon who I named Fletcher. At the time, I didn't realize that that was Lydia's last name.


"What was that?"
"Mine."
- Gerdef / Ceres
Comments:
We were discussing an item that we found.


"Is cursed the same as doom enchanted?"
- Ceres
Comments:
Is it?


"Ow, ow, ow, ow, OWWWWWWWWWW!!"
- Jaimas
Comments:
You don't really get a sense of how powerful lightning enchanted monsters are until the higher difficulty levels.


"Where's Mark?"
*** Mark has dropped due to ping timeout.
- Jaimas / the system
Comments:
The system said this almost immediately after Jaimas asked this, so it seemed like a response.


"Did I ever tell you about..."
"Dan, shut your hole."
- Dan / Brooke
Comments:
Dan tends to tell people about things over and over.


"Diablo! I shall pour liquid nitrogen on him and crack his buttocks with a hammer!"
- Brooke
Comments:
Nice battle plan!


"I don't care. We're NOT putting an anatomically correct Grim Ward here."
- Brooke
Comments:
Fine by me.

Diablo I quote
"OK, the Butcher on Nightmare is way too hard for me. Here's what we do, I'll..."
::walks into the Butcher's room and kills him in 3 hits:: "That was easy."
"Damnit."
- Kevin (level 25 sorcerer) / Jaimas (level 23 warrior) / Kevin
Comments:
=D


"What's being dead like?"
"Pretty boring. I already hummed all the songs I know."
- Kevin / Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas was dead in Diablo's area and hadn't pressed escape.


"Come out double-swinging!"
- Ceres
Comments:
I was singing the barbarian's version of the Offspring song "Come Out Swinging" but it had too many syllables. {:-(


"ACK! HEY! ARGH!!" [orc voice] "STOP POKING ME!!!"
- Someone Ceres was dueling against.
Comments:
I used a spear at that time.


"Where's a gun when you need one?"
- Mark
Comments:
Mark was being attacked by the high council.


"Jaimas! Jaimas, are you high?!"
- Kevin
Comments:
Kevin was guessing why Jaimas ran into the high-council alone.


"Have a beer, Dan."
- Mark
Comments:
Mark was hurling oil potions.


"What I need is a reaaaaaally big shoe."
- Adam
Comments:
It was Adam VS the Sand Maggots.


"AAAAAHHHHH! LAWYERS!!!! RUN AWAY!!!!"
- Bill
Comments:
Bill was running from the council members.


"AHHH!! GET 'EM OFF ME!!"
- Adam
Comments:
Adam meets a Hell Swarm.


"Can I have rare?"
"No, I killed the jerk, it's mine."
"ME WANT RARE!"
- Ogg / Jaimas / Ogg
Comments:
::shrugs::


[sings] "Itchies, itchies, it-chies! Itchies, itchies, it-chies! Itchies, itchies, it-chies! Itchies, itchies, it-chies!"
- Logic
Comments:
As a mage, Logic had no trouble beating the itchies, and therefore like them alot.


"Do something!"
"I am!"
"Standing arround with Prayer and Thorns while the Unique Rogue kills herself hitting you is not something!"
- Kevin / Jaimas / Kevin
Comments:
I'd agree with Jaimas,,,


"Conquer, conquer, conquer!"
- Logic
Comments:
Not a bad idea,,,


"WHAT?! I gave you 2 skulls! I had to kill 2 of my friends for those!"
- Gerdef
Comments:
Gerdef was ranting because I gave him an insanely good axe that I found and I said that he still owed me big for it after the two perfect skulls that he gave me. I think he still owes me big. After all, this axe deals 45-86 damage, +204 to attack rating, 10% mana stolen per hit,some other stuff, and this is a one-handed axe!


"I'll hold this armor for you until I can play with you. By the way, now you owe me 6 squares in your inventory."
- Ceres
Comments:
I was holding some ornate plate for Gerdef.


"I never run like a squirrel. If I run, I run like a barbarian."
- Gerdef
Comments:
I told Gerdef that I had put 2 points into increased speed so that I could run like a squirel.


"Blast it! I can't do math and fight at the same time!"
- Ceres
Comments:
I was trying to figure out some stats and I couldn't because I was fighting at that moment.


"Annoyance, thy name is Leaper."
- Brooke
Comments:
Indeed it is.


::Kevin Breaks Mephisto's Soulstone:: "I didn't do it."
- Kevin
Comments:
LOL!!


"I need a Stone of Jordan."
"I know how to get one."
"How?"
"Kill Victor and take one."
- Adam / Brooke / Adam / Brooke
Comments:
I'm beginning to feel sorry for Victor.


::kicks a barrel and nothing happens to it:: "hmm..." ::kicks it again and it doesn't break:: "I guess barrels have more defense than we thought."
- Gerdef
Comments:
Have you ever kicked a barrel and missed?


"This Desert is Stupid."
"Yeah. They need a drinking fountain out here."
"A 7-11 would be better."
- Jaimas / Mark / Dan
Comments:
Very true!


"Once again, Charsi shows off her massive intelligence, by having the voice of the Medic from StarCraft."
- Brooke
Comments:
I actually didn't notice that,,,


"Dude, where's my Cap?"
- Bill
Comments:
I guess he forgot his cap.


"Meteors are hazardous to your health."
--Ceres
Comments:
Well they are!


"How can a 2-foot tall critter hit me so F$&^ing hard?!"
--Dan
Comments:
Dan was commenting about fetishes.


"This place is not evil! The good is just temporarily dormant!"
--Ceres
Comments:
This really doesn't belong in this section, but I'm putting it here because my friends were comparing my house to the outer steppes.


"The cube should have 4 more squares! It's not square!"
--Ceres
Comments:
I forgot, it's a cube, not a square.


"I prefer to watch, it make me feel more in control."
--Norah
Comments:
This was Norah's justification for having me play her character. It doesn't make much sense, 'cause if I play her character, she's not really in control.


"But your head's a bucket."
--Kevin
Comments:
He was commenting on Dan wearing a full helm.
This is a cool VGRPG quote, too!


"Oh, for god's sake, PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!!!"
--Brooke
Comments:
You can guess which demon she ran into.


"I got cancer."
"What?"
"I got cancer."
--Mark / Jaimas / Mark
Comments:
He was poisoned.


::sings:: "A questing I shall go. A questin I shall go. Hi ho today I go. A questing I shall go."
--Ceres
Comments:
I just felt like singing.


"HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!! I KILLED BAAL IN HELL DIFFICULTY!!!!"
"No, you didn't."
"Yes I did!!"
"That's a neat trick."
"What?"
"Did you hear what you just said?"
--Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
This was said before the expansion pack came out.


"Here, demon, demon, demon--AAAHHHHHH!!"
--Ceres
Comments:
I got a little more than I was asking for.


"I need a Patriarch."
"I have one."
"Really?"
"Heh-heh..."
--Dave / Dan / Dave / Dan
Comments:
Dan, owner of said Patriarch, throws it on the ground, and makes an Iron Golem out of it.


"Hey guys! I just got to level 16, and - WHOA, UGLY!!!"
--Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas encounters Andariel.


"Whoa! It's a chick! Hey bab- AHH!!! Stop hitting me!!!"
--Mark
Comments:
Mark meets a Huntress.


"GIVE ME THE DAMNED FLAMBERGE BEFORE I BLOW AN AGGRESSION INHIBITOR!!!"
"Jaime, this is Diablo II."
"Oh yeah."
--Jaimas / Kevin / Jaimas
Comments:
They're both made by Blizzard...


"Sadly, Jaimas lacked the stamina to withstand the unholy force of bandwidth, and was promptly 'dropped from the game' whatever that means."
--Dan
Comments:
Lag is just as evil as Mephisto!!


"AHHHHHH!!!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!!!!"
--Mark
Comments:
He said this as soon as he saw Mephisto.


"Thou canst not kill what dost not live, but you can knock it over, and then blow his body into indistinct giblets."
--Kevin
Comments:
This is true.


"The enemy of my enemy is my.... Ah, hell. Kill 'em all."
--Dan
Comments:
None.


"GET IN HIS BELLAH!!!"
--Kevin
Comments:
His revived Regurgitator eating dead bodies.


"Ok! Place your bets! Doom Knight Vs. Venom Lord! I call Venom Lord!"
--Kevin
Comments:
- Kevin said this upon him and Jaimas using Revive and Conversion to have monsters fight


"I have a firewall."
"What level?"
"I have a firewall."
"What level?"
"I have a firewall."
"What level?"
"SHUT UP, BOTH OF YOU! It's software!"
--Logic / Ceres / Logic / Ceres / Logic / Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
I didn't know!


"ANDARIEL BAD!!!"
--Oog
Comments:
You gotta love Oog.


"You kill it!"
"No, you kill it!"
"I'll kill it!"
"How?"
--Mark / Dan / Jaimas / Adam
Comments:
Various people facing an Iron Golem with level 20 Iron Maiden on it.


DARTH VADER!!! I MUST FACE YOU, JEDI STYLE!"
--Jaimas
Comments:
Jaimas VS an Oblivion Knight.


"FIRE!!!!!"
--Mark
Comments:
He said this after he saw a fire golem.


"Oog no like bone wall. Oog Hit Bone wall. Bone wall no die! OOG HATE BONE WALL!!!!"
--Oog
Comments:
That says it all, really.


"I have a Stone of Jordan."
"Give me it."
"But it's my last one!"
"Give me that goddamned ring."
"Why?"
"BECAUSE I'LL [censored] KILL YOU!!!"
--Victor (level 12 nercomancer) / Zeltar (level 45 barbarian) / Victor / Zeltar / Victor / Zeltar
Comments:
Victor then does what? RUNS OUT OF TOWN LIKE AN IDIOT. Zeltar chases, and Victor starts throwing up bone walls. Zeltar Leaps 'em, and keeps chasing him. Victor continues to bone wall, and Zeltar uses Whirlwind, bashing through his walls. Zeltar clips him, and Victor dies extremely messily, in one hit.


"Ha! Take that, demo- Hey! Where'd my health go?!"
--Jaimas
Comments:
As a Paladin, I used Sacrifice with Concentration and a Flamberge. Killed the dirtball in one hit, but was left with 1 HP!


"A level a day keeps Diablo at bay."
--Ceres
Comments:
This is actually quite true. For the last 2 weeks, (12/15/00-12/28/00) I've been following this philosophy with wonderful results (level 32-46). Yes, I'm crazy, but there is reason to this. I recently got this incredible amulet, (+2 to all my skills, +20 to all resistances, and a bunch of other stuff). It's prolly hacked, but it has a required level of 67, so you have to earn it. Only 21 levels to go!


"What's your IP number?"
"see.you.in.hell"
--Ceres / Gerdef
Comments:
I actually typed that it.


"Why should you have to kill a skeleton? It's redundant."
--Ceres
Comments:
It is!


"WHAT!? I want to play Diablo II, not bellsouth.net internet connection!"
--Ceres
Comments:
For some reason, whenever I open Diablo II, my computer tries to connect to bellsouth.net


"I have 236 stamina out of 211."
--Gerdef
Comments:
He never clearly explained how this happened.


"Ah, finally. Lan Esen's Tome." ::click::
"I can't carry anymore."
--Gerdef / His character
Comments:



"Cold mastery lower's enemies' resistance to cold, right? Cold mastery is humidity!"
--Ceres
Comments:
It makes sense, doesn't it?


"Are you on fire?!"
--Norah
Comments:
She saw me cast a fireball.


"I gotta go back to the afterlife some time. It was fun!"
      --Gerdef
Comments:
Since he uses leap attack so much, he runs into the afterlife bug, where the game thinks that he is dead, and he can't affect anything, but he can still run around and explore and add to his map.


"After we've killed them, then we can save them."
      --Ceres
Comments:
I was commenting on the "Redemption" spell.


"Stop killing me, you coward!"
--Ceres
Comments:
Well, he was a powerful monster, and he kept teleporting, so, I said "Stop killing me," then he teleported, so I added "you coward!" to it.


"You're online and I can't give you the my exceptional junk!"
--Ceres
Comments:
Well, they're exceptional items, but they're useless to me.


"I've hired Phaet 6 times."
"How many times has he died?"
"7"
      --Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres
Comments:
You see, when I found the Gidbinn, I got him for free.


"Damn demon!"
      --Ceres
Comments:
It's redundant.


"A don't hire mercenaries, I hire targets."
      --Zach
Comments:
His title is, "The destroyer of Diablo" so all the mercenaries flock to him, however, they don't see the other part of his title, which is, "and mercenaries."


"[to Gerdef] Do you have a flawless skull?"
"No, he doesn't do his homework."
      --Ceres / Gerdef's mother
Comments:
He should do his homework,,,


"You can't carry a Ballista!"
"Yes, you can!"
"Alright, maybe a barbarian can,,,"
      --Ceres / Gerdef / Ceres
Comments:
I found a exceptional heavy crossbow, which is called a "ballista," and if you don't know what a ballista is, it's a giant crossbow and the arrows are about 6 inches thick! Try to picture a barbarian pushing a ballista through Hell.


"Why don't you just go to hell,,,"
      --Gerdef
Comments:
I've used up my imbue in Nightmare and Normal, but I wanted to imbue my rune edge.


"What the!? Zakarumite Champion!? I'm a Paladin! I'm the champion of Zakarum!!"
      --Ceres
Comments:
Anyone who has read the Diablo II and Diablo manuel will know what I'm talking about.


"OK, my outfit matches perfectly. I have an ancient shield to go with my ancient sword and ancient armor, and a war hat to go with my war boots, and a demonhide sash to go with my demonhide gloves."
      --Ceres
Comments:
Happy!


"Don't take things that you can't reach!"
      --Ceres
Comments:
In Diablo II, sometimes you can take things that are out of your reach.


"I have chronic waypoint syndrome!"
      --KC
Comments:
He actually does. No matter how many times he activates the waypoint, as soon as he restarts the waypoint deactivates.


"This guy is eas--" ::dies::
      --Ceres
Comments:
He was really strong, but he had low accuracy, so I had no idea he could take me out in one hit.


"I'm being swarmed by small, annoying, and harmless things!!"
      --Ceres
"I'm small, annoying, and harmless!"
      --Aerial Bob
Comments:
Indeed, he is,,,


"How can the Amazon wear full plate mail and still be revealing!?"
      --Ceres
Comments:
IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!


"From hence forth, Og will now be known as Sir Og."
      --Adam's computer after he killed Diablo
Comments:
All Barbarians should be named "Og."


"I'm just killing DiablOH MY GOD!!!
      --Adam
Comments:
From that point on, we refer to Diablo's lightning attack as "OH MY GOD!!!"


"Can I use my two-handed sword with one hand?"
      --Adam
Comments:
Actually, as a Barbarian, he can.



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