Due to
Dakota Dick and Ranger X's impressive records it was decided earlier in the week
that no only would Lumberjack have to face one of them, but both of them in a triple-threat
match. Here's what Lumberjack had to say: "I don't appreciate the fact that
my matches are being decided for me without my consent, but if somebody wants to
see me defend my title against Dakota Dick and Ranger X then so be it. I've studied
Dakota Dick over the past month and Ranger X has been my tag-team partner for over
a year now, so I think I'll do just fine." Dakota Dick had a different feeling
about their match. "The way I look at it, it's me against E.D.A. Even if Ranger
X really wants the Heavyweight title, I don't see him going the distance with Lumberjack.
If I'm gonna win, I'll have to find some way to drive a wedge between E.D.A and
take them down individually."Other
big news during the week, Bobby Jr. challenged Al Bino to a Death Match. He told
him that it was his time to face the reaper. When Al Bino was asked if he worried
about Bobby Jr.'s prophecies he responded with laughter.
FNA drove
up in his huge Dodge Ram and hopped out. He stood in the middle of the street waiting
for Big Mac to show when a ghetto lowrider bounced its way towards FNA. Big Mac
had the hydraulics on his car working, and came at FNA like he was going to squash
him with his car. FNA moved out of the street as Big Mac stepped out of his car
with a crowbar. Big Mac chased after FNA and finally blasted him in the back with
the crowbar. FNA was laying on the ground as Big Mac slammed the crowbar into his
ribs. Big Mac dragged FNA over to a tree and then scraped his face all over the
bark. FNA's face was sliced up and bleeding pretty bad when Big Mac yanked a flower
pot out of a neighboring yard. As he went to smash the pot over FNA's head, FNA
grabbed a broken branch off the ground and shattered it across Big Mac's skull.
Big Mac stumbled back and received another shot to the head by FNA's fist. FNA gripped
Big Mac by his shirt and then threw him through a screened-in porch. Big Mac was
laid out across a patio table when FNA ran and delivered a body splash that completely
demolished the table. FNA then took a patio chair and drove Big Mac's head through
the seat. When Big Mac tried to remove the chair from around his neck, the plastic
jabbed into him and caused his neck to get all cut up. FNA grabbed Big Mac and tossed
him out of the porch and then helped him remove the chair from around his neck.
FNA just yanked on the chair as Big Mac began bleeding and pieces of broken plastic
remained firmly in his neck. FNA continued to pound on Big Mac and literally dragged
him all the way across the yard back into the street. Big Mac attempted to fight
back but FNA hoisted him off the ground and crushed Big Mac with a Ska Bomb onto
the hard concrete. As FNA bent over to lift Big Mac off the road, Big Mac got a
hold of his shirt and pulled him forward. FNA fell head first into the side of his
truck and left a nasty dent in it. Big Mac made an effort to fight, but his attempt
went unrewarded. As he stood in front of FNA's truck about to destroy him with a
stop sign, FNA shoved him backwards against the grill of the truck. FNA then flagged
him off and executed his F-U clothesline. Big Mac's head was slammed so hard against
FNA's truck that it left a dent in the grill. FNA rolled up Big Mac and got the
victory, as Big Mac blacked out for over three hours.
The Lady
Killers made an eventful entrance with Magnum rubbing his nipples and Mr.Magic flexing
his "love" muscle. Surprisingly, the ladies in the crowd really enjoyed
the show and offered their phone numbers, along with other items of clothing, to
the Lady Killers. Magnum even got a couple of kisses before the match. If Social
Anarchy hadn't come out, those kisses might have lead to some heavy groping. Apocalypse
and Taz walked out wearing the Tag Team titles and their Social Anarchy t-shirts.
They pulled out a couple of bucks and started waving them in the Lady Killers' faces.
As Magnum began to unbutton his shirt, Apocalypse and Taz jumped him and stuffed
the money in his mouth. The ref rang the bell as both teams were already going at
it. Taz was kicking Magnum in the ribs, the legs, the back, the butt, and right
in the face while Apocalypse kept Mr.Magic down by stomping on his chest. Taz grabbed
Magnum by the head and Apocalypse grabbed Mr.Magic by the head. Social Anarchy then
ran and headbutted their opponents into each other. Both of the Lady Killers were
laid out on the mat as Social Anarchy pulled a table into the ring and set it up.
They then placed Magnum on top of the table and went to full nelson slam Mr.Magic
onto Magnum through the table. Mr.Magic rapidly kicked his heel back and smacked
Apocalypse in the crotch. He then yanked his partner off the table as Taz went crashing
through it with a devastating axe-kick. While Taz was down, the Lady Killers went
to work on Apocalypse. Apocalypse went to big boot Magnum, but Mr.Magic clipped
his supporting leg and took the big man down. Mr.Magic then spread Apocalypse's
legs like he was about to deliver an atomic headbutt, but instead, Magnum slid under
Mr.Magic's legs and went feet first into Apocalypse's genitalia. Both men jumped
on top of Apocalypse for a pin but Taz kicked both of them off. Taz drove Mr.Magic
head first into the mat with a face buster and then ducked as Magnum ran at him.
Magnum did a frog leap over Taz's back to get annhilated by Apocalypse's big boot
in mid-leap. Apocalypse then delivered a pendulum backbreaker to Magnum as Taz almost
took his head off with a guillotine legdrop. After executing their Armaggedon finisher
on Magnum, Apocalypse turned around and received a Disappearing Act from Mr.Magic.
As Mr.Magic went for another running lariat, Apocalypse grabbed his arm and whipped
him right into a Lights Out from Taz. Taz then wrapped Mr.Magic up for a pin as
Apocalypse took care of Magnum with his Hangman. Social Anarchy eliminated Mr.Magic
by pinfall and Magnum by submission to pick up the victory and retain the Tag Team
titles. On their way out, Apocalypse had something to say to his defeated opponents.
"Don't let this loss shatter you monstrous egos. After all, losing is just
nature's way of saying YOU SUCK!!!" Social Anarchy then exited back to their
dressing rooms for some SMACKDOWN on the Playstation.
Al Bino
confidently walked to the ring and was ready to obliterate Bobby Jr., however, Bobby
Jr. had other plans. He came out with a microphone and clarified what he meant by
"death" match. "Al Bino, you seem to have misunderstood me when I
challenged you to a Death Match. What I really challenged you to was a match with
Death." From behind Bobby Jr. came a monster wearing a black robe and carrying
a huge sickle. "You see, I warned you the first week of October that the end
was near and that soon you'd have to pay for your sins. Well, the end is NOW! It
is time for you to face the reaper, so let me introduce you to your opponent, the
Minion of Death." Al Bino was shocked to see Minion again, he thought for sure
that 'Kingdon Come' was the last he'd see of Minion. Bobby Jr. walked over to Minion
and removed his cloak and sickle, revealing the embodiment of Death. Al Bino thought
at first he was facing the same old Minion, but soon he realized he was going toe-to-toe
with Death. The ref started the no holds barred, last man standing, death match
as all three men stood in the ring. Bobby Jr. read a final prayer to Al Bino and
then told Death to end his misery. Al Bino wasted no time and went right after Death
with his new move he calls the Torpedo, in honor of the Australian swimmer, Ian Thorpe.
Basically, Al Bino ran at Death, ducked his head down, and delivered a charging
headbutt. The blow knocked Death back, but in no way knocked him down. Al Bino
then wrapped Death's arms and headbutted him over and over and over again. Death
went for a power clothesline, but Al Bino dodged it and laid Death out with a belly-to-back
suplex. Death sat right back up and was rudely awakened with a brick to the side
of his head. Al Bino had a brick and was pounding it relentlessly upside Death's
head. While Death was down, Al Bino took his legs and wrapped him in the White Out
submission. Death was bent back and struggling to break free, which he eventually
did. Al Bino had a chair and was about to smack Death with it when Death reared
back and punched the chair so hard it dented in and flew backwards at Al Bino's face.
Al Bino held onto the chair long enough to stop it from smacking him in the face,
but there was nothing he could do to stop Death. Before he knew it, Al Bino was
lifted off the mat and body pressed to the outside of the ring. Death followed as
Al Bino threw weapons at him from ringside. Both men returned to the ring where
Al Bino took a chair and cracked it against Death's skull. He then laid the chair
in the middle of the ring and executed his Down with Whitey finisher onto the chair.
Death was laid out as the ref began the 10-count. Al Bino rolled out of the ring
and went after Bobby Jr. The prophet fell to his knees and begged Al Bino not to
harm him. He stated that he was just the messenger of Death and of no harm to him.
Al Bino showed no remorse as he picked Bobby Jr. up and delivered another Down with
Whitey. The ref got to nine when Death stood straight up and pulled Al Bino into
the ring. Al Bino went to punch Death, but Death kicked him right in the stomach
and delivered a crucifix powerbomb. Death then picked Al Bino up, threw him on his
shoulders like a body slam and delivered his Last Judgement. The ref counted to
ten and awarded Death with the victory.
Bobby Jr.
entered the ring and read Al Bino a prayer as Death draped his cloak over the sinner
and pulled out his sickle. Death lifted the blade high over his head and was about
to put an end to Al Bino's life when Mr.Magic and Magnum ran out from the back and
knocked the blade out from Death's hands. Magnum was beating the $#!@ out of Bobby
Jr. as Mr.Magic tried to get Al Bino to safety. Death got a hold of his sickle and
swung the massive blade at Mr.Magic. The blade was two inches away from Mr.Magic's
face when Death pulled back. He just stood there and watched as Mr.Magic dragged
Al Bino to the back. Magnum ran behind them as Bobby Jr. yelled, "You can't
cheat Death, because in the end he always wins."
Dakota
Dick entered the ring with his cowboy hat on his head and his red bat in his hand.
He'd been waiting for this match for months now and was ready to become the WYDW
Heavyweight Champion. The only problem, not only was Dakota Dick fighting against
two of the best wrestlers in the WYDW, he was fighting against one of the most successful
tag teams in the WYDW. Ranger X made his entrance wearing the Hardcore title belt
and crossing his arms for the infamous ranger "X". Both of the challengers
watched from their corners as the Champion entered the ring. Lumberjack had the
Heavyweight title slung over his shoulder and calmly entered as his opponents stared
at his coveted belt. The ref took the Heavyweight belt, raised it in the air, and
officially started the match. Right from the start, Ranger X and Lumberjack teamed
up to take down Dakota Dick. They took turns dropping legdrops and elbow drops as
Dakota Dick had to absorb all the abuse. Lumberjack's plan was to wear down Dakota
Dick early with double-teams and then make it an individual match-up, either against
Dakota Dick or Ranger X. Ranger X laid out Dakota Dick with a swinging DDT and then
went for the Sure Thing. As Ranger X came crashing down for his Sure Thing, Dakota
Dick rolled to the side and left Ranger X face-first on the mat. Dakota Dick quickly
wrapped Ranger X in the Hog Tie, but Lumberjack broke the hold. Lumberjack then
drilled his knees into Dakota Dick's head repeatedly until Dakota Dick collapsed
on the mat. Lumberjack locked Dakota Dick in a longbow backbreaker, but Ranger X
broke up the submission. Ranger X then put Dakota Dick in a figure-four leglock,
but Lumberjack broke up that submission. E.D.A went back and forth taking their
shots on Dakota Dick. Things began to change when Ranger X went for a running body
splash and Dakota Dick reversed that move into a spinning sitdown sidewalk slam.
Ranger X was holding his back in severe pain as Lumberjack came over and knocked
the fool out of Dakota Dick with a knee to the back of his head. Lumberjack stuck
Dakota Dick's head between his legs and went for a Log Jam, but Dakota Dick used
all his might to heave Lumberjack over his shoulders with a back toss. Dakota Dick
then mounted Lumberjack and delivered a dozen wrecking ball force punches right to
Lumberjack's noggin. Lumberjack was prepared for Dakota Dick's technical attack,
but not his brawling assault. Dakota Dick got off of Lumberjack and hoisted him
up on his shoulders for a samoan drop. Lumberjack saw the move coming and reversed
it into a crucifix pin. Dakota Dick kicked out and as he stood up got speared by
Ranger X. Both wrestlers got back on their feet as Ranger X went for a hurricanrana,
but Dakota Dick caught Ranger X and was about to Dick Drop him when Lumberjack kicked
him in the stomach, allowing Ranger X to execute the hurricanrana. After that last
cycle, Dakota Dick was worn out and laying on the mat. Ranger X and Lumberjack took
the opportunity to execute their Total Destruction finisher. Lumberjack executed
a Sequoia Splash off a chair and Ranger X followed that by springboarding off a trash
can for his Sure Thing. He quickly wrapped Dakota Dick up for a pin and got to
two before Lumberjack kicked him off. Lumberjack waited till Ranger X stood back
up and then buried him face first onto the mat with a Log Jam. Lumberjack then went
over to the still laid out Dakota Dick and locked him in the texas cloverleaf. Dakota
Dick was fighting to get free, but just couldn't figure out how to break the hold.
Finally, he was relieved by a low dropkick to Lumberjack's face from Ranger X that
caused the hold to be broken. Ranger X grabbed Dakota Dick for a DDT, but Dakota
Dick quickly delivered a punch to Ranger X's ribs and then set him up for the Dick
Drop. As he was doing so, Lumberjack strategically placed himself behind Dakota
Dick and waited for the right moment. Dakota Dick lifted Ranger X in the air and
slammed him explosively onto the mat with a Dick Drop. As Dakota Dick went for the
pinfall, Lumberjack ran up behind him and drove his head hard into the ground with
a Timber bulldog. Lumberjack tightly wrapped Dakota Dick up and gained the 1-2-3
to remain the Heavyweight Champion.
After the
match, Lumberjack was asked if he at any time during the match was worried about
losing. Lumberjack responded, "I'm too good of a wrestler to lose. Even if
I thought at some point I was going to lose, I knew things would go my way. Just
look at my competition: Ranger X was fighting with me instead of against me, and
Dakota Dick doesn't pay enough attention to actually win a handicapt match. To sum
up the match; I studied my competition, I took advantage of their mistakes, and I
walked out the victor. I don't rely on luck to win, I rely on skill." Lumberjack
then lifted the Heavyweight belt over his head and left the arena the champion.