Question: How many E Mail List Subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?

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Answer: 1,001

1 to change the light bulb and to post to the mail list that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

106 to write to the list administrator complaining about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this mail list.

41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames.

99 to post that this list is not about light bulbs and to please take this email exchange to private email

113 to demand that cross posting to other mail lists about changing light bulbs be stopped.

101 to defend the posting to this list saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are** relevant to this mail list.

156 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty.

27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs 14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly, and to post corrected URLs.

3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant to this list.

33 to concatenate all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and footers, and then add "Me Too."

12 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

19 to quote the "Me Too's" to say, "Me Three"

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.

1 to propose a new "Light Bulb Changing" Mail List

47 to say this is just what the Mail List was meant for

123 votes for the new Mail List

Pagan Lightbulb Jokes

Gardnerian: I can't tell you that, it's a Craft secret

Alexandrian: What do the Gardnerians say?

Feri: That's oathbound in my line....but if you ask someone in another line, THEY'LL tell you.

Dianic: Lightbulbs are a patriarchal institution. We must reclaim our wombyn power with ca- uh, yoni-shaped oil lamps....

Reclaiming: We don't have consensus on that.

Fam-Trad: A candle was good enough for my grandmother, and it's good enough for me!

Druids: Twelve. One to hold the lightbulb, and eleven to drink until the room spins.

Church of All Worlds: First, you must read at least seven books from our reading list on the history and theory of illumination, and write an essay addressing two opposing views on lightbulbs. Then, change the lightbulb however you want.

Asatru: There is nothing about lightbulbs in the lore. Clearly, our ancestors were not afraid of the dark like the rest of you wimps.

Solitary: **taps fingers** ONE. Duh. But you have to get them out of the broom closet first.

Ceremonial Magician: .....needs no other to perform this Working, though he may gather with others in a group of seven or nine. He merely holds the lightbulb aloft, intoning the secret sacred names which are in the glossary in the back of the book....and the Universe revolves around him in all his power and glory.....

How many members of your sign does it take to change a light bulb?

ARIES: Just one. You want to make something of it?

TAURUS: One, but just try to convince them that the burned-out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.

GEMINI: Two, but the job never gets done -- they just keep discussing who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done!

CANCER: Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grieving process.

LEO: Leos don't change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo in to do the job for them while they're out.

VIRGO: Approximately 1.000000 with an error of +/- one millionth.

LIBRA: Er, two. Or maybe one. No, on second thought, make that two. Is that okay with you?

SCORPIO: That information is strictly secret and shared only with the Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierarchical Order.

SAGITTARIUS: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?

CAPRICORN: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.

AQUARIUS: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so...

PISCES: Light bulb? What light bulb?

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