.....sung to the tune of the theme from "Gilligan's Isle"
http://www.gilligansisle.com/theme.html

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale
of a group quite lacking wit
That started with a Gathering of Y Twatha Twits

The High Priest was a lecher with a Witch Queen for a wife
and a few pathetic followers, most without a life
yes most without a life.....

The Gather started getting rough
attendees nearly drowned
The staff packed up and ran away
in search of higher ground
......in search of higher ground

The Twits put up a website where they clearly dislike vowels
with stolen work.......
and smut ads too..........
The lecher and his wife....
post their snits
and plagiarize
In the name of Y Twatha Twits!

[Second verse.... yes the theme to Gilligan's Isle did have a second verse]

So this is the tale of the Twatha Twits
they've bugged us way too long
Since they just won't go away
we'll mock them with our song
yes mock them with our song

The lecher and the witch queen too
will do their very best
to slander those who criticize
their predacious on-line mess.

No skill, no pride, no dignity
these people have no shame!
Like poachers hiding in the bush
all Pagans are fair game

So join us in our song my friend
you're sure to get a smile
The Twits may steal our website
but we'll rag on them with style... :-)

Betsy Ashby
February 6, 2000

mailto:Center@OutoftheDark.com
http://www.OutoftheDark.com

A Man Named Ted
(Sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies theme song.)

Come and listen to my story 'bout a man named Ted
Just poor 'ol trailer trash trying to keep his family fed
And then one day while he's hunting up some food
He came upon a place where the folks were playing nude
Naked they were ....Skyclad .... in the Buff

Ted danced around the fire and he really was amazed
With all those bouncing titties, he left the circle dazed
He couldn't quite believe his luck, his dreams were coming true
He wondered what his Christian God expected him to do
Very confused ....gotta choose

Well the next thing you know 'ol Ted's a Pagan Priest
And he says to his friends "this religion's kinda neat"
I can screw who I want and its not considered sin
And my weenie gets sucked by the women wanting in
The Great Rite ... what a Sight

When Ted's wife found she could swap him for a stud
She joined the Coven quick 'cause her hubby was a dud
She practiced polyamory and learned the lifestyle well
Which was quite a large achievement for a word she couldn't spell
The Five Fold Kiss ... what Bliss

Their Coven grew and grew, based in ignorance and hate
Sex became a weapon to control the postulates
"Power to the Penis" became the battle cry
They didn't understand that Patriarchy has to die
Goddess Bless ...what a Mess

The moral of this story should be plain for all to see
It comes down to the basic choice of who you want to be
WitchCraft is a lifepath, a true religious Faith
It's not an easy method you should use to get a date
Love and Light ....that's Right

Betsy Ashby
8/11/98

Back Home