Proselytizers |
The last one I had to deal with didn't even get the chance to insult me. It was a bible thumper of one brand or another, came to my door when I was home alone and packing for the upcoming long haul move. I answered the door, thinking it was one of the neighborhood kids come looking for my niece...or the new next door neighbor who has been borrowing a lot of stuff...turns out to be a young couple out "visiting with folks and sharing the Good News".
He asked me "Have you been saved?"
I replied, "From what?"
She countered, "Are you born again?"
I said, "I believe so...how many incarnations have you been around for?"
He asked, "Can we share the Gospel with you?"
I said, "Which one, I think I've got them all."
She said, "We would like to tell you about Jesus Christ and how he died for your sins."
I nodded gravely, "Ah, yes...I gave at the office...my sins that is, I don't have anymore to offer you."
He (getting frustrated) said "We are all but lowly sinners, in need of God's Grace."
"I am so sorry for you." I replied, swiftly shifting gears. "Did you know that the Mother will take you in her arms and smother you in love without anyone having to die?"
Looking confused they both say, "What?"
"I feel so bad that your God makes you feel as if you are inferior. The Goddess lives within each of us, making us a part of each other...when you are in pain, I am too. How can I help?"
"Goddess?" At this point the man looked fairly green, and I dropped the pentacle pendant I had been playing with in my hand back to its regular place on my chest.
"Yes, sir. I can see that you are so in need of her healing touch."
They left rather quickly after that...I watched as they fluttered up to another couple, twittering excitedly and pointing in my direction. I came out into the yard and waved, yelling after them..."Brightest Blessings, my friends. I'll be praying for you!"
They haven't been back though...wonder why....
