There are times in every intimate relationship when we wish to express to the other person that he or she is doing something that we feel is not in alignment with his or her spirit.

This is a delicate moment. For when we share any kind of criticism, the attitude we hold toward the other and the manner in which we speak are an essential part of the message we convey. The communication becomes difficult to receive if we are relating out of a sense of separation or condescension, if we are bitter, judgmental, or angry or if we are needing the other person to change. There is a much greater possibility that our communication will be heard and received when we are embracing the other as essentially well and whole, and when we speak with acceptance and respect for who he or she already is.

We have all at times used our intimate relationships as a place to vent our frustrations. A healing relationship, however, calls for impeccable responsibility and infinite fairness and respect. For only then can enough trust develop so that trembling hearts can open deeply to each other and risk being known.