One morning I was listening to the radio while
    driving to work.  The D.J. was interviewing
one of the writers of the book
 "The Warning Lable Book".

I was amazed at how stupid Corporate
America thinks we are.
Either that or maybe it has something to do
with all the stupid people out there that jump
at every opportunity to sue somebody.
Which ever it is, I got a good laugh out of it!!!!

I thought it would be good bathroom reading
for family and friends who came to visit me,
so I went to the bookstore to buy it.

After reading it, I have to admit, I started
checking the labels myself.  The ones I saw
were, in fact, what the book stated they were.
Hence, my dedicated page to the companies
that hire really expensive lawyers to write
this stuff , and to the authors of this book
who have a knack for turning a legal issue
into a pleasant bathroom experience!

I am listing a few excerpts from the book
that I find particularly amusing.
If you want to read the book in it's entirety,
it is written by;
Joey Green, Tony Dierckins, and Tim Nyberg.

1.   Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer:
WARNING: Do not use in shower.
Never use while sleeping.

2.   Ray-O-Vac Renewal AA  reusable batteries:
If swallowed or lodged in ear
or nose see doctor.

3.   Kellogg's Pop Tarts:
WARNING:  Pastry filling
may be hot when heated.

4.   Nabisco Easy Cheese:
For best results, remove cap.

5.   Packages containing Silly Putty:
WARNING:  Not for use as earplugs.

6.   Found on a hammer  handle:
CAUTION:  Do not use this hammer
to strike any solid object.

7.   Found on a butane lighter:
WARNING:  Flame may cause fire.

8.   Gatorade:
Scientifically formulated to taste
best when you need it most.

This guy needs it!

9.   A rest stop on a Wisconsin highway:
Do not eat urinal cakes.
 

10.  Seen on restaurants and stores:
This door to remain unlocked
during business hours.

11.  Northland jumbo size fire log:
CAUTION:  Risk of fire.

12.  VCR box:
Instructional video on hooking
up your VCR included.

13.  Weber gas grills:
CAUTION:  Surface will be warm when in use.
 

14.  Axius Sno-Off Automobile Windshield cover:
CAUTION:  Never drive with the
cover on your windshield.

15.  Batman:  The Animated Series Armor Set
Halloween costume:
PARENT:  Please exercise caution-
mask and chest plate are not
protective; cape does not enable
wearer to fly.

16.  Continuous Roll Towel dispensers:
MAINTENANCE OPERATOR:
Failure to follow loading instructions
could result in serious injury or death.

17.  NAPA automotive fan belts:
CAUTION:  Before starting service
work, be sure engine is off.

18.  Cayman Airlines safety booklet:
If you are seated in an exit aisle
and are unable to read this, please
ask a stewardess to reseat you.

19.  Instructions for folding up a portablebaby carriage:
Step 1:  Remove baby.

20.  Wagner industrial heat gun:
WARNING:  Do not use heat
gun as a hair dryer.

21.  McDonalds Restaurant:
Braille menus available upon request.
(submitted by "theperdues")
what she would like to know is...
who reads the sign,
the blind man or the dog?

I hope you have enjoyed these as
much as I have .  Don't be suprised
if you find yourself checking out the
warning labels the next time you go
to the grocery store!!!!