"Hey!! Why is our table wobbling?" asked George.
"I dunno. Wanna go and take a look?" said Jon.
George nodded, and the two motioned for everyone to be quiet. When they were right beside the table, Jon reached out to pull away the tablecloth while everyone held their breaths. Swiftly, Jon pulled the tablecloth, revealing a trembling Ozorne.
"Ozorne!!! What are you doing here?? Aren't you dead?" asked a very shocked George.
Ozorne, still trembing, nodded. And kneeled in front of Jon and George.
"Oh please!!! Please let me be a judge!! I know I am a ghost and I was mean to you all... But please forgive me!! I'll be real good from now on. Please let me be a judge! please!!" he begged.
"Of course you can!!!" answered Briar cheerfully.
"WHAT?!!" yelled Jon and George, "DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU JUST SAID!?! DO YOU KNOW THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOU AGREEING TO LET HIM BE A JUDGE??"
"Oh c'mon, everyone deserves a second chances. Give him a chance, show him your greatness, and set the best rolemodel for all of Tortall!!!" recited Briar emotionally.
"Oh Thank you! Thankyou!!! Thankyou so much!!" cried Ozorne happily, with tears of happiness streaming down his face.
Jon and George sighed and slumped down on their seats.
"Oh great," wailed Jon, "First we have a half dead/half god cat as our host, then we have a god as a Judge, then we get a brainless, clueless kid to replace a god, and now we a have ghost that everyone hates as another Judge!!!!"
"That's enough guys!!!" said Faithful impatiently, "We need to move on. Get in your seats IMMEDIATELY."
"Geez, what's with him today?" whispered Jon to George.
"I think it was because you called him a 'half dead/half god cat'." whispered back George.
Jon's heart jumped. He hated to be one the bad side of Faithful. It was afterall, as he said, half god.
(back on stage)
"Would you please put your hands together for Miss Kalasin!!" cried Faithful as Kalasin walked gracefully on to the stage.
"Oh Man!! She's cute!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" said Briar.
Jon glared at him. "What do you think you are doing? First calling my WIFE hot and sexy, then call my DAUGHTER cute! What is it with you?"
Briar stared at him, eyes opened wide and full of envy. "She's your daughter? You mean, you have all these beautiful, stunning ladies and girls as you're relations? And you can be with them all day without like, breaking the rules?? Oh gosh you're lucky!!"
Suddenly he felt a shadow coming near him. Briar looked up and saw a furious Ozorne in front of him.
"How dare you say all these disrespectable things about my DAUGHTER-IN-LAW!"
"She is NOT your daughter-in-law." yelled Jon.
Ozorned rolled his eyes and whispered at Jon. "You dumb piece of crap, can't you see that this is the only way to get him to shut up about your daughter?"
Jon nodded knowingly and turned to Briar. "Sorry, i made a mistake. Kally is betrothed to Kaddar."
"How cute is that!!" cried Briar, "Kally, Kally, Kally. Hi Kally!" he yelled as he waved to Kalasin. Kalasin blushed and smiled
Jon slumped back in his chair again. "What is it with him???" he wailed, "Doesn't he care if the girl is married or betrothed?"
"Nope! As long as the girl is good looking. And of course 'hot, sexy and cute'!" said George cheerfully. "Ouch!!!" he yelled as Jon stepped on toe. Hard.
"Don't you sound like it's got nothing to do with you." Jon said threateningly, "Just wait until he get's on Alanna." George turned pale. He turned almost clear when Briar asked:
"Who is Alanna??"
"That one." Ozorne pointed at Alanna.
"Wow! She's a beauty!"
George fainted.
******************
"Uncle George, are you alright?" asked Kalasin worriedly.
George opened his eyes. "What?! Oh yeah... oh NO!!!!!!!!! What's going to happen to my dear Alanna?! NO!!!!!!! Briar, please! I beg it of you! Spare me from this pain!!!"
"Okay! OKAY!" Briar tried to calm George down, "NOTHING is going to happen your *dear* Alanna! I was only making a compliment. You should be proud!!"
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After a little more confusion, everything is back on track.
"So, princess Kalasin, tell us what do you think about boys?"
The entire male population of the audience sat up straight in their seats, only to be pulled back against the seats by the entire female population of the audience. But nevertheless, they were listening carefully.
"I think that boys are..."
"Just like ME!!!!" screamed Ozorne from the Judges Stand.
"Shut up!!" yelled Jon as he whacked Ozorne *hard* on the head.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Ozorne in pain as he collapsed.
"Uh-oh."
George looked at Jon. "I think you should get him to Duke Baird."
"I'll do it!" said Briar cheerfully. Getting out a phone, he quickly pressed some numbers. "Hello? Yes? ... You really are the Tortallan Royal Flying Doctors Service?! Goody! ..Huh?...oh yeah... there's someone hurt here... The name of the victim? oh yes, it's ...Oh-Zone or something.. what? where are we? um, at the Miss Tortall Competition of course! .... Address? Well, you see, I'm a bit new to Tortall so I don't really know about the roads... But I remember the way I came! See I was sitting in front of my mirror doing my hair, when there was a loud boom! then I flew through this bright passage.. and then tata! I arrived! ... what? You'll work it out yourself? How intelligent! Okay, see you soon! bye bye!" Turning off the phone, Briar looked up triumphantly. "All taken care of!"
Kalasin, Sandry, Daja and Tris formed a foursome on the stage and did a little cheerleading stunt: "Go Briar! Go Briar! We love you, Dear Briar! You're so handsome, you're so cute! You're our hero, yep that's you!!! Give me a B!! Give me a R!! Give me a I!!! Give me a A!!! Give me a R!! What does it spell? BRIAR!!!!!!!!!!!"
The judges - well, what's left of them - nodded in approval. "Excellent work! Couldn't have done it better ourselves." Briar beamed.
Faithful called out from the stage, "Right, Ladies and Gentlemen, while we are waiting for the healers to arrive, we might as well continue our competition. okay, moving on, princess kalasin, what would you wish for most?"
Kalasin looked thoughtful, then burst into a bright smile. "World Peace!" The audience started a round of applause.
"Well, aren't we all fortunate to have a princess like you, your highness. Well, ladies and gentleman, that's all our contestants for this year's Miss Tortall Competion. After the break, we will move onto the next section - Intellectual!! where our gorgeous contestants will receive on-stage Interviews - they will each answer a question to demonstrate their intelligence!!!!!!"