Do not see Thirteen Ghosts. Ever. Don't even be in the same room as the movie, even if it's sitting in the case. If you know anyone who bought the movie or plans to, smack some sense into the fool. The first sign this movie was bad came in the form of a preview. The words "from the producers of House on Haunted Hill" flashed across the screen.... as if that's an accomplishment. This movie is the most craptacular suckfest ever. Seriously, it was so much worse than you could even begin to imagine. They also killed the only person I didn't want to die.. they always do that.

Overall scores:

Violence: 6/10- Some crappy deaths... the only really good one was the psychic dude's... GRR! The psychic guy got the crap beat out of him with that ghost with a bat though. That was entertaining for a short time.

Characters: 6/10-
The annoying little kid-He should've died 10 seconds into the movie.
The stereotypical black maid-She should've died with the kid.
The mom-She did die 10 seconds into the movie.. I like her.
The dad- He didn't really do much, aside from not die.>:O
The crazy old uncle guy- He died in the very beginning... and in the end. Confused? I was too.
The lawyer- He died first, of course.. everyone hates lawyers.
The psychic dude- I actually liked him. However, the guy who played him played Shaggy in the Scooby Doo movie.. unacceptable. He should've thrown the dad in front of the glass instead of himself.
The ghosts- Arguably the best part of the movie(I prefer the psychic dude myself). The hammer, the jackal, and the juggernaught were very, very cool looking though. They didn't give the cool ghosts enough time on-screen though. The juggernaught got all of 30 seconds(spent beating the crap out of the psychic dude).
On a side note, I'd like to mention that the juggernaught(or rather the actor who played him) is friggin' HUGE. 6'9" to be exact.


Effects: 4/10-There was the occasional thing which was somewhat impressive-looking(the "hammer, "juggernaught", and "jackal" ghosts were pretty cool looking), but for the most part it sucked. The part in the beginning where some random nobody gets pulled between the two cars was so fake looking it's not even funny.

Acting: 3/10-Bad. Just..plain..bad..period.

Script: 1/10-The writing was the only thing worse than the acting. Among the worst lines were:
"I hope I don't bleed to death. That would SUCK."(that was actually kinda funny, but still a stupid line)
and
"Did the lawyer split?"
See, it's funny because he did! He split right in half! HAHAHAHAHAHA!... God I hate this movie.

And now, the disease-o-meter. Here, I will tell you which disease I would rather have than watch this movie.

Ebola
AIDS
Salmonella <---
A severe case of death
Dysentery
Strep throat
Toenail fungus
Halitosis
A mild case of death
A cold

In conclusion: I hate this movie and I hope everyone involved with it in any way dies slowly and painfully. The only one who I would show mercy to is Matthew Lillard(the psychic dude). However, he was in the Scooby Doo movie, as I mentioned before. Therefore he must die with the rest.

**/*****

Relevant links:
IMDB:

http://us.imdb.com/Title?0245674
The official site:
http://13ghosts.warnerbros.com/
The back stories for the ghosts:
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/ThirteenGhosts-1110907/about.php