My name is Julie...I am 5'3" tall ... a bbw (big/beautiful/woman) with reddish brown hair and brown eyes. I have been divorce since 2/23/2000. I have two children...girl 29/boy 26. Daughter blessed me with a granddaughter 10, a grandson 6 and another one born 3/13/03.
My son is studying to be a chiropractor and will be a doctor by December 2003...I am so proud of him. Well he is now a Doctor and he is also engage to be married. My Daughter is a office manager and does very well...proud of how she also has turned out.
I was married 26 years to a man that was a only child that never understood what a family life was all about and how to be a father and a husband. He started to be very verbal abusive which lead to be mental abuse too. At the end he not only was more verbal/mental he became physically. I couldn't handle this and I had to finally give up on this marriage that I worked so hard in maintaining. I took my marriage seriously and I really worked at being a good wife, friend and mother.
Throughout the marriage I never tried to have friends because of how he would be so embarrassing. He talked down to people and he never held back on how he felt about anything. He would voice his opinion not realizing about anyones feelings. He never treated me this way as we were dating and we dated for 2 years. After we got married he continue to be great up until our children was born. Soon after we had our first child he change he started to be verbal. After our second child was born he was someone that wouldn't want to be with. It was all about what he wanted and it had to be his way or no way. He was spoiled and wanted all the attention and I never realized this until the children was born. How I was forced to see this was all the many times to go to counseling to get help in coping with everything and coping with the raising of the children by myself.
My ex husband did a number on my self esteem and right now even today I do have to work on this.
It is so hard to make friends and to trust again. I am so lonely and hungry to have a true friend. Being single is the hardest thing that I feel I have to do so far. To really cope with the every day moment and what is throwed at you. Things has changed from 26 years ago. I am not 20 anymore. To now start over a age of 49 years old I have to now realize ... with whom I start over with he will have habits that I have to learn to be ok with...as he too has to be ok with me. Places I have been to in the past are no longer there and where to go to have fun at to be able to meet new people I don't know where to go.
To the new man in my life hopefully will take me as is and we can enjoy our life together to the fulliness. To know the most important thing now together will be COMMUNICATION with each other and never try to go to bed angry at one another. Hopefully I will like my present and future to reflected the great improvement of my knowledge of my learning from my past and to know the importance of working together is. Talking and listening to one another. Never assume things and remember we are not mind readers. To think before saying anything because words are like a weapon they can hurt and once they are out the damage has been done. Would like to talk with each other without the fear of being put down or not feeling my opinion matters. I have learned and read something lately that is kinda heavy and makes you think....
Yesterday is History
Tomorrow is a Mystery
Today is a Gift
That is why it's called
THE PRESENT!!
How i feel this statement is all about is learn from your yesterdays mistakes and take it and tried to do better with the present. You can't undo the yesterdays but only make the Todays reflect off of what you have learned and to undo and make better for all your Tomorrows. As for all the Tomorrows that to me in one person's hand...GOD. He is who then you shall pray to and ask for your help and strength of all the Tomorrows to come.
Here is another cute sentence I learned that only contains 10 words all only being two letters.....
"IF IT IS TO BE IT IS UP TO ME".
Powerful statement I feel and how true also.
My dream of being with someone to the ends of time was bursted but hopefully with a second chance I maybe able to find a partner that will love the following....
holding hands, cuddling, kissing, talking, caressing, hugging,snuggling up with each other. Curling up with each other and just feeling the warmth and love that we have to share with each other. I am so afraid right now to give my heart again but yet if i don't try I will never know if there is life after a divorce. Plus if there is Mr. Right out there to be with me to the end of time. My prince and shining armor. I don't want to go to the end of times without know the true meaning of love and knowing that God did have a special man out there for me. I know I do have fairy tales dreams and fantasy of something that is all in my dreams. But hopefully just maybe please let me have a part of my dreams. I would love to have my soul mate and to have that speacial man that I can look into his eyes and right into his soul as he would be able to do with me. Hopefully this special man will be a great teacher to me to show me what I have and had miss in my past and will have it in my present and defending in my all tomorrows.
I am not a woman that has to be wine and dine to please. I love the simple things of life. Just driving around and showing me the state I was born in would be cool with me. I was born in Miami, Florida and really haven't gone around just in the state of Florida. Sharing sunsets would be nice. Going to the beach and just walking there or just watching the sunset there would be very nice with each other.
This time around hopefully the man I will finally find to share all of what I have mention will be someone that believes in God and help me to continue my faith into him.
I know this was a brief introduction to me and hopefully not enough to scare you off...I am a great friend and a faithful one too. I love to have fun and to laugh. I am looking forward to just have the opportunity to start off as friend and see what develops from there. We have to start some where and we can't have enough of them. This is the year of 2003 it is a new beginning and hopefully someone will be coming into my life and take my pastlife and erase all of the bad and replace with all goodness.
The first year was my year to mourned and looking back at all the things that i did and didn't do and how to change them now and in the future. Now the second year was taking all of what I thought of and to learn from it and that is why I am now taking the time to make this site and say hello there....what to be my friend.
As I great stronger these pages will hopefully start to reflect that growth and you will see how much I have learned. I started this web page to sorta help me and to express myself and to answer a lot of your questions before you ask them also just maybe that is how I can let go of all the bad past too. To allow you to read my thoughts and share a little part of myself is already a step of growing and breaking through to a new beginning. Friendship is so important to me and well....HELLO nice to meet you and hope we will become great friends and continue to be honest with each other.
Hopefully we can meet on line and do some chatting. I like to meet this way. I also like to exchange pictures. As for my profile you can see me on there...and also you see me here right now with my children.
wissiter2...check out profile with yahoo along with going to the briefcase and go to my folder. In there is a fantasy story that is sorta hot. Warning please don't read in the office unless you can lock that door for a brief moment....lol.
Also if you are home make sure no one is around. I was told to put a warning to the story. Now I have not done anything in the fantasy in real life. It was a dream one night and I got up and wrote it down. Found out that one day I shared it with a friend and he said great stuff and go ahead and share with others.....it is hot he said and why not get others hot too.................so that is what I have done......enjoy it... if you can not open it up let me know and I can manage to share with you another way....xoxoxo
the other side tell it all...if you want more ask me.....
A friend loves at all times.
March 13,2003
