The Generation X Top Ten Videos of 2000.

Introduction

It’s the year end, and time for everyone and their brother to do top ten lists. Why do we do it? Because caplet sized reviews are easier to read than well-written thousand-word reviews that tell you movies suck, and have since 1968. I did it because someone asked me to do it, and besides, it’s fun.

Now, I don’t really think that the Generation X tag line really applies anymore, since most of us are in our late twenties or early thirties, but I’ll go with it, since Harley asked me to write this, and he still thinks we’re Generation X. Of course, he’s a baby-boomer, and that tag never went out of style. Lucky him. My generation, we’re stuck with a tag that was hip for about five minutes, five years ago. Hurm.

The following ten flicks should appeal to everyone who was born between the summer of love and prior to the original theatrical release of Star Wars, which is my definition of those of us who belong in Generation X. I myself was six when Star Wars came out, changed my life it did. Yup. Before that I didn’t know who I wanted to be when I grew up. Afterwards, I wanted to be Luke Skywalker, without the whining.

The criteria for inclusion on this list was that all films had to have appeared on video or DVD in the year 2000. They had to appeal in some way, shape or form to my generation. These weren’t the BEST films to be released on video in 2000, it’s not that kind of list, these are simply the best Gen-X films for 2000.

In alphabetical order:

Beyond the Mat. Documentary with Mick "Mankind" Foley, Jake "The Snake" Roberts, Terry Funk and a bunch of other wrestlers. Directed by Barry Blaustein.

Professional Wrestling is as big today as it will ever be. One reason is that "kayfabe" or the unwritten code that those involved in the "sport" weren’t ever to talk about the fact that it’s fake, has been broken. Vince McMahon, owner of the World Wrestling Federation (the largest wrestling corporation on the planet, for those of you who live in a cave) freely admitted some years ago that their matches were scripted, and that they knew who would win and lose. Now, it’s all still done with smoke and mirrors, but in this fascinating piece of work, we get to take a look behind the smoke and mirrors, and wonder at the great Oz (or Vince) himself.

The documentary focuses on three mat veterans, Mick Foley, Jake Roberts and Terry Funk. Foley, a man who has no regard for his body, is shown being beaten senseless by The Rock’s dozen or so chair-shots, right in front of his children. Roberts is shown as a has-been crack addict, who’s best days fighting in the ring with Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant, are behind him. Funk is seen as a dutiful family man, who loves the business so much, he can’t quit, even though he’s way past 50, and needs artificial knees.

Fascinating, and sick at the same time. I wonder though, how much of this documentary was staged, and what was real, because after all, it is wrestling, and everything in wrestling is fake, isn’t it?

Dogma. Starring Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Linda Fiorentino, Chris Rock, Jason Lee, George Carlin, Selma Hayek, Alan Rickman, Jason Mewes, Bud Cort, Alanis Morrissette and Kevin Smith. Written and Directed by Kevin Smith.

Say what you want about his filmmaking, but the big Kev is one funny guy. Even though it took almost a full year after it was finished to get this one to the screen, the wait was well worth it. The story, and this one actually does have one unlike Clerks or Mallrats, has Jay and Silent Bob (Mewes and Smith) as Prophets who accompany the resurrected thirteenth apostle Rufus (Chris Rock) and the last remaining ancestor of Jesus Christ (Fiorentino) on a mission to save mankind from two disenfranchised angels in the guise of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon. Oh, and George Carlin plays a Catholic Bishop, Alan Rickman plays Metatron (the voice of God), and Alanis Morrissette plays God Herself. Are you with me? Didn’t see it? Buy it, live it, love it.

The humor is fast and furious, and believe it or not, reverent as well. Smith is a lapsed Catholic, but he obviously has a love for the religion and all it’s trappings. He pokes fun at what Catholicism has become, but he’s not mean spirited at all. By and far this is Kevin Smith’s best work. There’s the traditional witty Smith dialogue, and some great visual sequences in this that make it a step above his previous three works (and a giant leap above Clerks). Now we just have to wait for Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.

Fight Club. Starring Brad Pitt, Edward Norton, Meat Loaf and Helena Bonham Carter. Written by Jim Uhls from the novel by Chuck Palahniuk. Directed by David Fincher.

I was all ready to hate this movie. Blah blah blah, Brad Pitt can’t act, blah blah blah, big Hollywood movie, whatever. Blah blah blah, everyone who’s seen it likes it.

I LOVED IT. Of course, halfway through the movie you realise that the move you’re watching isn’t the movie that you started watching, and that somewhere along the way, the Director really started messing with your head. It’s kind of like a Phillip K. Dick novel, without the Science Fiction stuff, and double the dose of paranoia. I love those kinds of movies. If you haven’t checked it out, you must, you really must. And rule number one, don’t talk about Fight Club.

Galaxy Quest. Starring Tim Allen, Sigourney Weaver, Alan Rickman, Tony Shalhoub, Sam Rockwell, Daryl Mitchel, and Enrico Colantoni. Directed by Dean Parisot.

Spoofs of Star Trek are a dime a dozen (especially lately, what with Free Enterprise and Trekkies released almost simultaneously), heck the show even spoofs itself half the time, but it’s rare that these spoofs are actually funny. So it’s a surprise that Galaxy Quest works on so many levels. The entire cast plays Star Trek archetypes, well, that is, they play actors who have played Star Trek archetypes, see there are some aliens out there who think that the show is actually a historical video archive, and really think that the actors are the characters they portray. Hilarity ensues. No really, it’s funny, but not mean at the same time. Well worth it.

Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai. Starring Forrest Whitaker, John Tormey, Cliff Gorman, Henry Silva, Ray Vargo and Tricia Vessey. Written and Directed by Jim Jarmusch.

I’m not a huge fan of Jarmusch, but I’ve tended to like what I’ve seen of his work, Dead Man is one of my personal top 20 films of all time, but then that’s me. Here he combines text from the Hagakure, the legendary book that is the code of conduct for the Samurai warriors of feudal Japan, with a typical mobster film. The result is sublimely affecting. Whitaker, who at this point in his career is stepping further and further closer to legendary status, portrays Ghost Dog, an enigmatic hitman for a mobster that he keeps in contact with by carrier pigeon. Flashbacks tell his backstory, and it’s an engaging one. Ghost Dog keeps you wanting for more, and it keeps delivering. Tricia Vessey is quite beautiful as a mobster’s daughter who gets caught up in the violence. I can’t recommend this one enough.

Gladiator. Starring Russell Crowe, Connie Nielsen, Joaquin Phoenix, Richard Harris, Derek Jacobi, Djimon Hounsou and Oliver Reed. Directed by Ridley Scott.

OK, so it’s no Alien, heck it’s not even Blade Runner, but it is better than 1492, and GI Jane. Ridley Scott, the man who visualized Cyberpunk for our generation and literally blew the roof off of the Macintosh computer, brings us the decadent Rome that we’ve all heard of. Yeah! Complete with big battles and fantastic gladiatorial fight-fests, it’s the WWF on steroids, with computer generated tigers thrown in for fun. Oh boy, can we have more please? Well it’s not great cinema, but for us blood-thirsty desk-sitters who were brought up playing shoo-em-up video games and sucking down Big-Gulps, watching Russell Crowe fight it out old-school style without mercy sure beats anything else out there.

High Fidelity. Starring John Cusack, Iben Hjeile, Jack Black, Todd Louiso, Lisa Bonet, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Joan Cusack, Tim Robbins. Cameos by Lili Taylor and Natasha Gregson Wagner. Based on the book by Nick Hornby. Directed by Stephen Frears.

Quick, top five films directed by Stephen Frears? Can’t name five can you. Would it surprise you to know that Frears directed Dangerous Liaisons? No? How about The Grifters? Yeah that got you. Also he directed two thirds of Roddy Doyle’s Irish Trilogy (The Snapper and The Van), seeing is Alan Parker bowed out after The Commitments. Cusack is at his best when he’s given a role that is much like he appears to be. He’s believable as the every-man, who has it just a little better than the rest of us. (Cf. Grosse Point Blank and the aforementioned The Grifters). Cusack plays a Rob, record store owner, but not the regular type of record store owner (i.e. not a faceless corporation), he’s a regular bloke, who has just broken up with his latest girlfriend. We know this because we see it in flashbacks. We also see the four other biggest break-ups in his life, this is because Rob is fond of making "Top Five" lists, and unless you live in a cave (see the previous Beyond the Mat caplet), you’ve heard of these lists. It’s a cute quirk, but it worked better in the book.

I just noticed something too, the two main characters are name Rob and Laura, and the next two supporting characters are Dick and Barry, is this perhaps a shout-out to the Dick Van Dyke show? Sorry about the non-sequitur.

Rob spends the rest of the film moping and whining about his life, but it isn’t horrible to watch, it’s funny actually. And he gets to bed Lisa Bonet, so that’s something. Eventually they all get back together and have a happy ending. Yeah.

Oh and there’s a fantastic soundtrack, with a great mix of 80’s classic pop songs, and today’s rockingest alternative. And Liz Phair is on it too. I love Liz Phair.

Shaft. Starring Samuel L. Jackson, Vanessa L. Williams, Jeffery Wright, Christian Bale, Busta Rhymes, Dan Hedaya, Toni Collette, and RICHARD ROUNDTREE. Directed by John Singleton.

"Who’s the black private dick who’s a s-- machine to all the chicks? Shaft. You’re Damn Right!."

I know a lot of people didn’t like this awesome flick, but I did, and you know why? Because it let Sam Jackson be a bad-ass for two hours. Well, an hour and forty minutes, but who’s counting. After being let down by his sitting butt for only ten minutes in Star Wars (see below), I couldn’t wait to see Sammy get down and dirty, and in this one, and he does, and it doesn’t take long either.

There’s some plot about a drug lord and some weasly corporate guy and a racially motivated murder, but really, who cares, you watch this movie for one thing, and one thing only, that’s to see Sam Jackson kick major booty. Busta Rhymes is pretty funny too.

Finally, it’s a true sequel to the other Shaft movies too, since the original MAN appears as Sammy’s Uncle, John Shaft the Elder. I hope they make another one, I really do, which they should, since it only cost $46 million, and it made $70 million.

Star Wars Episode I – The Phantom Menace. Starring Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman, Ian McDiarmid, Jake Lloyd, Ahmed Best, Terrance Stamp, Pernilla August, Ray Park, Anthony Daniels, Kenny Baker, Frank Oz, Brian Blessed and Samuel L. Jackson. Written and Directed by George Lucas.

If you didn’t see this film in the theater, then your membership in the Gen X club is hereby revoked. You aren’t one of us. Go hang out with the Buffy the Vampire Slayer Crowd you Dawson’s Creek lover.

Well it wasn’t Empire, but it wasn’t Jedi either. Which means that of the four films in the Star Wars oeuvre it ranks as #3 on my list as best Star Wars movie. Of course, that list is headed by Empire Strikes Back, followed by A New Hope. Return of the Jedi still holds the last slot, because it still sucks.

So the saga begins, but wait didn’t it begin in Star Wars? Nope, as you should all know Star Wars was merely Episode IV (or 4 for those of you who are roman-numeral deficient). Anakin Skywalker, someday to be Darth Vader, is a little kid who’s a slave on Tatooine. You know, Luke says that his home world is the farthest spot from the center of the universe in A New Hope. Sure seems to me like a lot of stuff happens on Tatooine. Anyway, Jedi Knights Qui-Gon Jinn (Neeson), and Obi-Wan Kenobi (McGregor) are sent to tiny Naboo to negotiate peace between the Nabooians and the Trade Federation, who has blockaded the planet, and basically taken over. From there, the plot gets stupider, so I’m not going into it. Suffice to say, there’s a completely useless Pod-Racing scene, which Lucas put in there just to get his own speed-kicks, and a space-battle that is meaningless, because we don’t give a crap about the two sides fighting.

But then there’s Darth Maul (Ray Park), who is clearly the second-best bad-ass villain George ever came up with. Yeah, he’s better than Boba Fett in my opinion, but that’s only because Maul has a double bladed light saber, and Fett only has a blaster and a rocket pack. Plus Maul is killed by a Jedi, Fett is killed by a stick. Maul also has more dialogue in one flick than Boba Fett had in THREE! ‘Nuff said.

This movie is worth buying for the final light-saber battle alone. It has great two Jedi vs. one Sith action, and a Jedi actually gets killed. Quite exhilarating. I actually watch this scene over and over again, just because. Someone should really make a tape of just the light saber sequences in the four flicks, that’d sell a million copies, really.

Of course, Lucas had to make us squirm with Jar-Jar Binks too. I hear in the next movie, he’s actually a senator. That’s reason alone for the Emperor to dissolve the senate in the opening scenes of Episode IV, any body that would have Jar-Jar Binks as a senator deserves to be destroyed.

Darth Maul: "At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi. At last we will have revenge." I love that line.

Titan A.E. Starring the voices of Matt Damon, Drew Barrymore, Janeane Garafalo, Nathan Lane, John Leguizamo, Ron Perlman, and Tone Loc. Directed by Don Bluth and Gary Goldman.

You might remember a laser-disc game called Dragon’s Lair, or it’s follow-up Space Ace. That was the last cool thing that Don Bluth created prior to Titan AE. He’s been working on those Land Before Time movies, and other crap like that. While Titan is no "Star Wars for this generation" it sure looks nifty. A perfect melding of traditional animation and the best CGI that I’ve seen in a long while makes this one worth while. The story is no great shakes, and it’s nothing that we haven’t seen before, but this one isn’t exactly a kids’ movie either.

So why is it on my list? Well, the last third of the movie is spectacular, and that follows some awesome action sequences. It fits the criteria. There’s a cool space-battle in amongst frozen asteroids, and a chase scene where helium trees are a major obstacle. Forget about the ubiquitous merchandising and the stupid story line, and just watch for the visuals, they’re outstanding.

X-Men didn’t make it, because, well, it wasn’t that good, though I’ll give it an honorable mention, because they got the characterization of Wolverine right. It also took FAR too long to get to the big screen too, I doubt that any one in my generation really gave two figs about X-Men, other than to see Wolverine anyway.