Part 1
He had finally found the courage to tell him. He had kept it inside for months and he was ready. But something had changed. JC had changed and Lance didn't like it. He wasn't the energetic JC anymore. His eyes had changed. There was something new in them. It was as if someone had taken his place. And Lance wasn't sure he could confide in the new JC.

JC didn't hang out with the guys anymore. He was going to only God knows where and he would come back late at night or early in the morning. Justin had tried to find out what was going on. But the only answer he got was silence. He had pushed the issue, hoping to get a reaction from JC. But no. No reaction, no anger. Only silence. His voice was always calm. His whole body was calm.

Lance had observed him for two weeks. In two weeks he had become worried for him. JC's behaviour was weird. He always had this goofy grin. A grin that never left his face. And now that Lance was sharing a room with him, he noticed something else. JC was barely sleeping. JC who was always begging to sleep more wasn't sleeping at night. His nights, when he was there, were spent in the bathroom.

" JC?" Lance asked shyly, knocking at the bathroom door.
" What?" A soft voice asked back. Lance couldn't find the words he wanted to say. The softness in his friend's voice was making him weak. He cleared his throat and leaned closer to the door.
" Are you okay?"
" I'm fine. Do you need the bathroom?"

Lance sighed and shook his head. He knew JC couldn't see him but he didn't trust his voice. He sat down on his hands. He missed his friend. He missed laughing with him. He missed staring at those beautiful eyes full of life. But more than anything, he missed feeling love from his friend. The unspoken words, the flirting, the subtle touches. JC was so far away now.

With a last sigh, Lance stood up and slowly made his way to Chris room. He entered the room without knocking. He knew Justin and Joey were watching a movie with Chris. He walked past Justin and Joey on the floor and flopped down on the couch. He leaned his back against the couch and closed his eyes.

After a while, he felt his friend's gaze on him.

" He's not coming?" Justin asked sadly. Lance shook his head. Tears were asking to fall. He rubbed his eyes, hoping to chase the tears away. He sniffled and hugged his knees to his chest.

" Lance?" Chris asked, sitting beside Lance. He put his arms around him and held him tenderly. " Do you want to talk about it? I know you're hurting more than any of us. If you need an ear, we're there."

Lance's eyes watered. " I miss him. He's not himself. He's not there. His mind is away. I want him back. I want him to talk to me. I want him to see me. I want him to lo…" Lance stopped and looked nervously at his friends.

" You want him to love you." Chris stated. Lances nodded and tightened his grip on his knees. He furiously wiped his tears away. " It's okay Scoop. We saw it coming." Lance looked at him and then looked at Justin and Joey. He saw nothing but comprehension. He let out a sigh of relief. He smiled for a second before remembering JC. He let out a sob and started to cry softly. Chris hugged him and let him cry on his shoulder. Justin moved to the couch and started to rub Lance's back. Joey stayed on the floor and looked at the scene in front of him. He was hurt to see one of his best friends hurt like that. He, too, was concerned by JC's behaviour. They were all. But Lance was getting it bad.

Justin felt tears in his eyes while rubbing Lance's back softly. If he knew what was wrong with JC, he could help him. But JC had been so mysterious. He had even tried to follow JC but it was useless. After a few streets he would lose him in the crowd. He thought maybe he was doing drugs but somehow doubt it. JC wasn't himself but it couldn't be because of drugs. He wished it wasn't because of that. And if Lance couldn't find what was wrong, he had no chance to find out. Lance was very perceptive, especially when it came to JC. It was something else. But Justin couldn't put his finger on it. And now the chances for Lance and JC to get together were slim. He knew JC was in love with Lance. JC had told him. But everything was different now.

He froze a moment when he felt something wet on his arms and realised he was crying. He looked at Joey and pleaded for help. He knew he would break down soon and he couldn't do that to Lance. Lance needed comfort. He had sworn he would be there for Lance when he first saw JC changing.

Joey stood up immediately when he saw the look on Justin's face. He moved to the couch and took his place. Justin excused himself to the bathroom. When he came back, his eyes were red and he was sniffling lightly.

Lance slowly broke from Chris embrace and looked at his friends. " Thanks guys. I'm sorry for acting like a baby. It's just…. it's so hard to see him like that." Lance said weakly. He thanked God for having such good friends in his life. But it didn't stop him to feel helpless. Something was going on with JC and they could only hope it would stop soon. " I'm gonna go to bed now. Thanks for your support guys." Lance said, standing up.

" Anytime Lance. You know we're here for you." Joey said. Lance waved with his hand on his way to the door.

Once in the hallway, Lance stopped and softly hit the wall. Thankful there wasn't any bodyguard near; he let his tears fall again. He hit his head repetitively on the wall until he couldn't feel it anymore. Then he breathed deeply and finally made his way to the room he shared with JC. Once inside, he saw the bathroom door still closed. He sighed and stripped on his boxer. It was no use to wait for him.

Half an hour later, he wasn't sleeping yet and he heard the bathroom door opening. He faked sleeping and waited for JC to climb into his bed. When he was sure JC was sleeping, Lance sat up on his bed. A weird smell was coming from the bathroom but he couldn't define what it was. It wasn't something he had smell before. He turned his head toward JC and watched him sleeping. It was the only time when he had the impression that he still had his friend. When JC was sleeping, he was still the same. Lance put his head on his pillow and kept staring at his love until he felt asleep, his pillow wet from his tears.

When he woke up the next morning, he felt more tired than he had been before going to bed. He looked at the other bed and saw that JC was already up. Against his will, he climbed out of the bed and went in the bathroom. Once there he tried to find some clue about JC. After some research, he found nothing. Admitting he couldn't find anything, he forgot the idea of finding something. He could still check JC's bags but it didn't sound right so he didn't even consider it twice. He jumped in the shower and let the water clean the feeling of emptiness he was feeling. The water was so hot, he could feel it burn his skin. But he didn't care.

He went to Justin and Joey's room for breakfast, hoping JC would be there. Like expected, he was there, in the corner of the room, not talking to anyone. Lance sighed and sat beside Joey. Joey gave him a compassionate look and put his hand supportively on his shoulder. Looking at him, the blond hypnotic green eye's shone their thanks.

Justin was staring at his best friend. JC was looking blankly in front of him, the goofy grin still on his face. The tall, curly haired crooner looked like he was ready to jump up and start screaming at his best friend. He had done it two days ago and JC had look at him with the stupid silly grin. He had to restrain himself from hurting his best friend. He glanced at Lance and could see that his eyes were puffy. 'Damn JC. What's wrong with you?'

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