Thunder: Hello and welcome to episode 21 of TPAMS.

Mew: We’re 21 already?

Thunder: I guess you could say that.

Mew: In a sense.... Any way, our 21st episode is going to be a cool one. No! A KEWL one!

Thunder: Riiiiight... Who do we have today?

Mew Two: I picked them, so I’ll present them.

Mew: OK. Who?

Mew Two: We have Kero, Li, and Sakura from Cardcaptors; Davis and Veemon, Ken and Wormmon, and Blackwargraymon from Digimon; a few walk-ins that didn’t give me a clear answer (They said “I’ll TRY to be there”); and a super suprise guest. Maybe guests. I’m not going to say.

Thunder: Sounds good. Lets get started then.

Mew: Bring out the first guest!

Mew Two: OK. First up is Kero.

(Kero flies onto the stage)

Thunder: Hi Kero.

Mew: Yeah!

Kero: Hello. How are you?

Thunder: Good. So, let me ask you... How come you let the Clow cards escape?

Kero: I was asleep. And besides, Everything happens for a reason. Even something as potentially bad as that.

Mew: Okay... How come the show is still going if all the cards were recaptured?

Kero: We have a new evil to deal with. Not to mention, Sakura still has to change all the cards.

Mew: Wow. This suddenly got complicated.

Thunder: You said it. Any way, What the hell are you Kero? A winged bear?

Kero: Uhhhh....... Can I ask you a question?

Thunder: OK Mr. Winged bear.

Kero: What makes you 2 think you’re so special? I’ve watched you before-

Mew: As you should.

Kero: - and you are really mean and rude to some people.

Thunder: Allow our expert accountant to explain. LIGHTNING!

(Lightning runs onto the stage)

Thunder: Lightning, please explain to Kero why we can do what ever the hell we want.

Lightning: OK. You see Kero, Thunder and Mew are very rich and powerful. They are number 1 in ratings and few people dare cross them. However, the talk show watching public likes things where people get upset, angry, violent, or stuff where they can laugh. Giving Thunder and Mew the right to do whatever they want allows them to accommodate all these needs and thus keep their number 1 status.

Kero: Uhhhhh...... Okay.

Mew: You may go Lightning.

(Lightning walks off the stage.)

Mew: Any other questions Kero?

Kero: No.

Thunder: OK. I’m out too. You really aren’t very interesting.

Mew: OK. BYE KERO!

Kero: Bye.

(He walks off the stage)

Mew Two: Your next guest is Sakura.

(Sakura walks onto the stage)

Thunder: Hello.

Sakura: Hi.

Mew: What’s the deal with your hair!? I need to know! I’ve been waiting so long to ask that!

Sakura: Well... I just like it like this. Short and manageable.

Thunder: OK. How come you and Li fought so much in the beginning?

Sakura: He thought I was unworthy.

Mew: And you get along fine now?

Sakura: Yes.

Thunder: Does Madison know she’s being replaced?

Sakura: What?

Thunder: Well, she WAS your best friend BEFORE the whole card deal, but you and Li have become pretty close now....

Sakura: So?

Thunder: SO, sooner or later you’re going to spend more time around him and less with her.

Sakura: That’s not true.

Mew: Do you think we’re stupid?

Sakura: No. Not at all.

Mew: Are you stupid?

Sakura: No.

Thunder: Well you must be if you don’t see what the rest of us do.

Sakura: Uhhh.... What’s that?

Mew: Well smart guy, you like him as in like him. Boy friends always come between best friends.

Sakura: WHAT!?

Mew: You heard me. Your new boyfriend is ruining your friendship with your best friend.

Sakura: None of that is true!

Thunder: It’s time to get off the boat, Sakura. De Nile is....ummmm.... yeah.

Mew: Thunder, stop.

Thunder: Yes mam.

Sakura: You 2 are crazy.

Mew: Are we? Or are you?

Sakura: What?

Thunder: Red or Blue?

Sakura: Huh?

Mew: One or two?

Sakura: You’re weird.

Thunder: No you are.

Sakura: I am not! You are!

Mew: I know you are but what am I?

Sakura: This is crazy! I’m out of here!

(She runs off the stage)

Thunder: Why are kids these days so touchy when it comes to us exposing their crushes on international television?

Mew: Who knows. Next guest!

Mew Two: Next is Li.

(He walks onto the stage)

Thunder: Hi Li.

Li: Hello.

Thunder: How come you got half the Clow cards?

Li: Some were just meant for me I guess.

Mew: Are you TRYING to get between Sakura and Madison or was that just an accident?

Li: What?

Mew: Thunder and I decided that your relationship with Sakura is ruining her friendship with Madison.

Mew Two: May I interject?

Thunder: You may.

Mew Two: If you haven’t noticed, Mew, Madison is everywhere they are.

Mew: That’s her desperately trying to hold their friendship together.

Thunder: Yeah. She’s kinda like a shadow. Do the ever pay any attention to her?

Mew Two: Not really....

Mew: Okay then.

Li: I think you’re both confused. I’m not trying to ruin any friendships.

Mew: I know that, dear. But you’re doing it any way.

Thunder: Yep. It’s not your fault at all. Girls are just stupid.

Mew: What was that!?

Thunder: Nothing.

Li: I don’t think I messed up their friendship. But if you think so, maybe you should ask Madison herself.

Mew: HEY!? That’s a good idea. Get her down here for an interview before the end of this episode Mew Two.

Mew Two: I’m on it.

Mew: As for you Li, you go backstage and send out Davis. You’ll be back out here later.

Li: Okay.

(He walks off the stage. Then, Davis and Veemon walk onto the stage)

Thunder: Welcome Davis!

Mew: And you Veemon.

Davis: Hi guys.

Veemon: Hello.

Thunder: So Davis, why do you always let that T.K. punk out do you?

Davis: I don’t know. Everyone always thinks he’s so much cooler and nicer than me! I’m the leader and I still get no respect!

Mew: We love you Davis.

Davis: Thanks Mew.

Thunder: How come everyone likes T.K. better?

Davis: Probably because he’s Matt’s brother. And everyone thinks Matt is so wonderful. Well, I personally don’t think Matt is that great either.

Mew: Why don’t you tell us what you think about all the Digidestened.

Davis: Okay.

Tai: He’s cool.

Matt: He’s OK. Nothing special, just OK.

Mimi: Whiner. I HATE her.

Joe: I like him. He’s nice. And smart too.

Sora: She’s OK. I don’t know her very well.

T.K.: Satan. I strongly dislike him.

Mew: Only “strongly dislike”?

Davis: He can be kinda cool sometimes.

Kari: She’s great. I love Kari...

(He starts staring off into space)

Veemon: There he goes again.... WAKE UP DAVIS!

Davis: Huh? Oh. Right. Sorry.

Thunder: No problem.

Davis: OK. Where was I?

Yolei: Only one word can describe her. B****.

Cody: Whiny nerd boy.

Ken: He’s cool. He helps me with my homework.

I think that’s everyone that counts.

Mew: OK. Do you think T.K. is trying to take your place as leader?

Davis: Maybe. But I won’t let him! Tai himself gave me the title of leader and I intend to keep it. I don’t want to let him down.

Thunder: Are you and Tai close?

Davis: Kinda. He’s the older brother I never had. I want to be just like him!

Mew: That’s nice. Gosh Davis. You’re such a nice kid. I don’t understand why everyone gives you such a hard time.

Davis: Well... It’s probably because I knida do and say stuff without thinking.

Thunder: So? I mess up all the time and I’m still the richest and most Powerful Pikachu in the world. No one and I mean NO ONE crosses me.

Davis: Well, I don’t have that luxury.

Mew: That’s OK. We’ll teach people to respect you.

Thunder: Yeah. If anyone says or does anything to you that you don’t like, you let us know and we’ll take care of them.

Davis: Okay.

Mew: But you have to promise us one thing.

Davis: What’s that?

Mew: You have to show T.K. that you are as smart and good and wonderful as he is and that you won’t let him walk around thinking that he’s better than you.

Davis: You got it!

Mew: OK. You go ahead and show him who Davis really is.

Davis: Right!

(He walks off the stage)

Thunder: And now Veemon.

Veemon: Yes?

Mew: How do you like Davis?

Veemon: He’s great! I couldn’t have gotten a better partner!

Thunder: Does he let what other people say get to him?

Veemon: He sure does. One time, we went home after going to the Digital World, and the others had picked on him as usual. Any way, when we got home, he just sat in the corner and wouldn’t talk to anyone. He didn’t even pick on his sister. When I asked him what was wrong, he just said that it was none of my business. After he ate dinner he finally decided to talk to me and I told him a funny joke about a Jesus starter jacket that made him happy again.

Mew: I see. Well, you make sure that you keep those punks from doing that again.

Veemon: Okay.

(He walks off the stage)

Mew: I’ll be back!

(She flies back stage. She returns a moment later with Ken and Wormmon.)

Thunder: Welcome.

Ken: Thank you.

Mew: So Ken, how’s life?

Ken: Good. I didn’t realize that friends could make a person feel so happy.

Mew: That’s nice. Is Davis your friend?

Ken: Of course! If it weren’t for him, I’d have no friends at all.

Thunder: So you think he’s pretty cool?

Ken: Yes.

Thunder: Then we have no quarrel with you.

(Ken gives him a confused look)

Mew: Don’t mind him. Any way, what made you decide to become the Digimon Emperor?

Ken: Well, I don’t really remember... But I think I decided when I realized how much power I would have and how no one could stop me.

Thunder: It’s nice that you made a complete turn around and aren’t evil any more.

Ken: Losing your only friend can do that to you. Only Wormmon believed that I could change and then he died because of me. I felt so awful that I realized all the wrong I had done.

Mew: That’s good. At least everything turned out OK in the end.

Ken: I agree.

Mew: So, what kind of shampoo do you use. Your hair is really nice.

Ken: Ummm.... I don’t know exactly. My mom buys it.

Mew: Well I need some. I’ll have to ask her.

Thunder: *sigh*

Mew: What!? Is it a crime to want nice hair?

Thunder: Mew, stop.

Mew: Grrrr.....

Ken: May I ask you a question?

Thunder: You may.

Ken: I really enjoy your show. It’s really funny. And Wormmon and I were wondering if we could help you some how.

Mew: Really!?

Ken: Yeah. We get really bored in the summer when there’s no school work to do.

Wormmon: I can help! I really can!

Thunder: Well... what kind of stuff can you do?

Ken: I’m a child prodigy! I can do anything!

Wormmon: Uhhhh.... I can digivolve.

Mew: OK. I’m convinced. Ken, you and Wormmon can be our bouncers!

Ken: O-kayyyy....

Wormmon: Should I digivolve?

Thunder: Yes.

Wormmon: OK! Wormmon digivolve to... Stingmon!

Mew: Excellent!

Thunder: OK, now you’ll go take Mew Two’s job till he gets back. If anyone gets out of line, you 2 take care of them.

Ken: OK!

Stingmon: Right!

(They walk off the stage)

Ken: OK. You’re next guest is Blackwargraymon.

(He walks onto the stage)

Thunder: Hi.

Blackwargraymon: Hello.

Mew: We invited you here because you remind us of our friend Mew Two.

Blackwargraymon: Yes. We had a conversation about how similar we are. He helped me find answers to many of my questions.

Thunder: Awwww.... Blackwargraymon made a new friend.

Blackwargraymon: I guess I did. Now I have.... 2 friends. Agumon and Mew Two.

Mew: We’ll be your friends.

Thunder: Yeah! We’d like that!

Blackwargraymon: Really? OK. Now I have 4 friends.

Mew: Would you like more friends? We have loads of them and we don’t mind sharing.

Blackwargraymon: I will make friends with those who are worthy of it. I will make them on my own sooner or later, but thanks for the offer.

Thunder: If you change your mind, you know who to call.

Blackwargraymon: Right.

Mew: Do you like candy, Blackwargraymon?

Blackwargraymon: Not really. It’s far too sweet for me.

Thunder: What is your opinion on Aaron Carter?

Blackwargraymon: I want to destroy him, his brother, and his sister. I hate them. They make me angry.

Mew: Me too!

Thunder: Do you hate Boy Bands too?

Blackwargraymon: Hell yes!

Mew: You kick ass!

Blackwargraymon: I try.

Thunder: Have you ever played Nintendo?

Blackwargraymon: Once... It was very hard for me seeing as the controller was too small.

Thunder: Do you watch cartoons?

Blackwargraymon: All the time!

Mew: You rule! You really do!

Blackwargraymon: Thank you.

Thunder: What’s your favorite cartoon?

Blackwargraymon: I like Dragonball Z. They fight a lot.

Mew: Who’s your favorite character?

Blackwargraymon: Vegeta. He’s so evil, but so nice at the same time.

Thunder: I’ve met him.

Blackwargraymon: That’s cool. Wasn’t he on your show once?

Mew: I think so.... Hey! I have an idea!

Thunder: What’s that?

Mew: We need someone to go out on the streets and get people to do stupid stuff.

Thunder: Hey!? That’s about the only thing we don’t have.

Mew: Would you do that, Blackwargraymon?

Blackwargraymon: Sure.

Mew and Thunder: SWEET!

Mew: You head backstage and get ready.

Blackwargraymon: OK.

(He walks off the stage)

Thunder: We’re getting lots of new help today.

Mew: Totally. Who’s next Ken?

Ken: Next up is... Just a sec..

(You can hear him run farther back stage. A few moments later he comes back)

Ken: Next up is one of the super suprise guests.

Mew: What happened to the walk-ins?

Ken: None of them are here yet.

Thunder: OK. Who is it?

Ken: Just a sec....

(He begins talking to someone backstage)

Ken: How do you say that?

(There is silence where person must be answering)

Ken: What?

(more silence....)

Ken: That’s a dumb name.

(More silence...)

Ken: OK guys. Your next guest is Ganondorf.

(He walks on to the stage)

Ganondorf: I don’t like that kid.

Mew: You don’t like any kids.

Ganondorf: That is true.

Thunder: I knew it was you.

Mew and Ganondorf: What?

Thunder: I knew you were the suprise guest. It was all to easy to guess.

Mew: *sigh* Any way, So Ganondork-

Ganondorf: What was that?

Mew: I called you GanonDORK. It fits you so well.

Ganondorf: I don’t think so.

Mew: TS. ANY WAY, what do you have against Link? Everyone else likes him. Why don’t you?

Ganondorf: First off, he tried to stop me from achieving my dreams of world domination.

Thunder: He also led you to the Triforce.

Ganondorf: I guess... Secondly, he keeps destroying all my monsters!

Mew: That’s because they try to kill him. He’s not going to sit around and let some monster kick his ass. Would you?

Ganondorf: I guess not...

Thunder: Anything else?

Ganondorf: Ummm..... He’s the good guy and I’m the bad guy. It’s my job to hate him.

Mew: That’s a really lame reason Ganondork. I expected more of you for some reason.

Ganondorf: Well I-

Thunder: You have no real reason for hating poor Link and wanting him dead. You’re just mean.

Ganondorf: That IS my job you know.

Mew: That’s a bad attitude to take on the situation. Why don’t you try to change the cycle. You don’t HAVE to give into peer pressure.

Ganondorf: I don’t think you understand-

Thunder: We understand perfectly. You’re mean and bad and won’t change because you think that that’s what everyone else is doing. Well let me tell you something mister, just because everyone else does it doesn’t make it right!

Mew: Remember that kids!

Ganondorf: But the villain isn’t supposed to become friends with the hero.

Thunder: There you go talking about what’s popular again.

Mew: Did you ever stop to think about how poor Link feels?

Ganondorf: Ummmm..... No.

Mew: How would you like it if you were just trying to live your life and I tried to kill you!

Ganondorf: I wouldn’t like that at all.

Thunder: So why are you doing that to Link then?

Ganondorf: Because....... Because....... Uhhhhh..... I guess I don’t have a good reason for you.

Mew: Our point exactly!

Thunder: You really should be nicer to him!

Ganondorf: But I want to rule the world!

Mew: So does Mew Two and he doesn’t hurt or try to hurt anyone.

Ganondorf: But-

Mew: But nothing! I think you should apologize to Link.

Ganondorf: WHAT!?

Mew: You heard me!

Ganondorf: But- But- I can’t apologize! I’ll be the laughing stock of the entire villaining world!

Thunder: You should have thought of that before you were mean.

Mew: Word.

Ken: You know what would be great guys?

Mew: What?

Ken: If you made him say sorry on the show.

Thunder: That would be great!

Mew: We should get Link right now.

Ken: He’s already here.

Thunder and Mew: REALLY!? SWEET! Send him out!

Ganondorf: No! I will not apologize on international television!

Mew: Oh yes you will!

(She gives him the “say sorry or die” look)

Ganondorf: Fine.

Ken: OK. I’ll go get Link.

(He runs backstage to go get Link. A few minutes later Link walks out.)

Mew: HI LINK!

Link: Ummm..... hello.

Thunder: I bet you’re wondering why we’d have you come out at the same time as your arch-nemesis.

Link: Kinda.

Mew: We’re glad you asked Link! We asked you to come out because Ganondork has something to say to you. Ganondork....

Ganondorf: You’re just kidding, right Mew?

(She glares at him.)

Ganondorf: Awwwww..... Fine. I’m sorry that I sent several evil, big, mean, scary monsters out to kill you.

Mew: And....

Ganondorf: And I’ll never do it again.

Mew: Very good.

Link: Wait a second. Why is he apologizing? Is this some sort of trap or something?

Thunder: No. Me and Mew forced him to say sorry because you did nothing to deserve several evil, big, mean, scary monsters trying to kill you.

Link: O-kayyyy...... That’s OK. I guess you were just doing your job.

Mew: HE WAS NOT! HE WAS JUST BEING A BIG, STUPID, MEAN, EVIL JERK!

Link: But if he wouldn’t have been a big, stupid, mean, evil jerk, I would have been out of work too. And besides, I’m world famous now because of him.

Thunder: I guess you have a point. Kinda.

Ganondorf: See!? I told you that was completely unnecessary!

Mew: Silence! Get off my stage before I destroy you! Please.

(Ganondorf walks off the stage.)

Mew: Lets not have him back any time soon.

Thunder: Okay.

Link: Can I ask you a question?

Mew: Everyone else has.

Link: Do you always try to turn people from evil to good, or possibly the other way around?

Mew: No. We just thought it was kinda mean of him to try and kill you for no good reason. After all, you didn’t ask to save the world, it just kinda happened.

Link: I guess. Can I ask another question?

Thunder: Are you forgetting who the hosts are?

Link: No. I just have been waiting to ask you another question.

Mew: OK. Go ahead.

Link: Are you having a special anytime soon, because I have a great idea for one.

Thunder: Actually we are. We have an idea, but we’re always open to other suggestions. Let’s hear it.

Link: Well, I saw a recording of your Evil Day special, and I thought to myself “What if they made up another ridiculous holiday? That’d be funny.” So I thought about what kind of holiday you could make up, and I got a great one.

Mew: What is it?

Link: Angry Day.

Thunder: Angry Day?

Link: Yeah. On Evil Day, everyone on the show was evil, so on Angry Day everyone on the show can be angry. There was this really mad kid at Target the other day that gave me the idea.

Thunder: I kinda like that idea.

Link: Or if you want to be more general, you could have Excessively Emotional, or Moody Day.

Mew: I like “Excessively Emotional Day”. Good idea Link. You can guest host that.

Link: Cool.

Thunder: AND you can help talk about our next special.

Link: What is it?

Thunder: LIGHTNING!

(Lightning runs onto the stage)

Mew: It’s time to tell everyone about our next special.

Lightning: Sweet! OK. Our next special will be the “For once Thunder and Mew’s demented sense of humor won’t be in charge” Special! That’s right folks! Tomorrow, instead of barking orders and talking smack, some of your favorite guests will be calling the shots!

Mew: This special is only happening because the network thinks we’re to pushy.

Thunder: This just proves we’re not.

Mew and Thunder: SO THERE!

Lightning: Our guest hosts are The Digidestened. Special appearances will be made by Blossom of the Powerpuff Girls, Brick the Roudyruff Boy, Sailor Neptune, Keroberus the Guardian Beast of the Seal, Ash, Lary with 1 “r”, and Giovanni! He’s just so much fun!

Mew: We threw Ash in because we need someone to torment.

Lightning: We’ll also hear from such famous people as The Elite Four, various gym leaders, the singing sensations Pinky and Pastell-

Thunder: You just put them in because their your friends.

Lightning: What’s your point? ANY WAY, as I was saying. We’ll also have our new friends from Cardcaptors, Harry Potter-

Mew: Harry Potter? I swore Kem said he wasn’t going to be in any stories.

Lightning: She did, but Mew Two convinced her to let him come just this once. He wants to turn Harry into a frog to prove that “worthless humans” are incapable of using magic. We’ll also have a whole lot more guests that are coming to visit. We’ll be airing live from the Viridian City Gym which Giovanni so kindly loaned us.

Thunder: My eye.

Lightning: SHHH! The viewers don’t need to know he protested.

Thunder: Fine.

Lightning: We’ll also be announcing yet another contest.

Mew: Wow! That sounds cool. I suppose they’ll have to wait until tomorrow to learn the details.

Lightning: Correct.

Thunder: Well Link, what do you think?

Link: That sounds great.

Mew: Of course it does. Will you come visit tomorrow Link?

Link: I guess so.

Thunder: GREAT! We’ll see you tomorrow then.

Link: Okay. Bye.

Mew and Thunder: BYE!

(He walks off the stage with Lightning.)

Mew: Anyone there yet Ken?

Ken: Yes. Tai, Matt, Sora, and Izzy are all here.

Thunder: We’ll take..... Izzy!

(Izzy walks onto the stage)

Thunder: Hi.

Izzy: Hello.

Mew: What’s new with you?

Izzy: Not a lot.

Mew: Are you still training Pokémon?

Izzy: Yep. We all are. Even the new kids. There have been times we wanted to quit, but Tai won’t have it. He always manages to convince us to keep it up.

Thunder: That’s good. How many Pokémon do you have now?

Izzy: 13. My favorite is Heracross. He reminds me of Kabuterimon.

Mew: That’s nice.

Izzy: I was talking to Matt and Tai backstage and we thought of something you 2 might not know.

Thunder: What’s that?

Izzy: Well, the last time we were here, you 2 weren’t very familiar with season 2, so you probably don’t know about Matt’s band.

Mew: The boy has a band?

Izzy: Yep. They do concerts and everything. It controls his entire life.

Thunder: A band you say? Hmmm.... We’ll have to ask him about that.

Izzy: Yeah. What else? Ummm.... He goes out with Sora now too.

Mew: Really!?

Izzy: Yes.

Thunder: I didn’t see that coming. Any other news?

Izzy: Not really.

Mew: Well it seems that Matt has a very interesting life lately.

Izzy: Yeah. I’ve just sat around being my usual computer nerd self.

Thunder: That’s ok. We like you just the way you are.

Izzy: Thanks Thunder. Any news for you? I hear Mew joined a Girl Band.

Mew: You heard about that?

Izzy: Yeah. I wanted to make sure I knew a little about you so I could carry on a conversation. We can’t just talk about me you know.

Mew: How nice of you. We can always count on you to be all caring and stuff.

Izzy: I try.

Thunder: So, why don’t you tell us about what’s been going on with you guys.

Izzy: Well, not a lot like I said. I did spend the day with Tai yesterday though.

Thunder: Tell us about that.

Izzy: Okay. We met at the park and went to McDonalds for lunch. He complained about Matt almost the whole time.

Mew: What about him?

Izzy: Well, Tai is feeling kind of..... upset that he doesn’t seem to be as......well liked as Matt by all the others. Despite the fact that they’ve been like best friends for a long time, the fight about stuff a lot. If you remember season 1, they were constantly fighting over the power, and now it’s kind of happening again.

Thunder: You don’t say.

Izzy: Yeah. However, I think this whole situation is kinda funny. The funny part is Matt sees it the other way. He thinks they’ve never gotten along better than they do now.

Mew: That is kinda funny.

Thunder: Why doesn’t Tai talk to Matt about this?

Izzy: That’s what I asked him.

Mew: What did he say?

Izzy: His reply was something along the lines of “I’m just proving myself right by talking to him”. He sees it as showing weakness.

Thunder: Tai always had a high opinion of himself.

Izzy: Yeah. I think he’s beginning to accept things the way they are though. But I guess that’s because Matt is standing 2 feet away every time I’ve talked to him today.

Mew: That’s so cute. The Digidestened are having teenage dilemmas! I thought they were super humans or something. You never showed signs of having such problems.

Izzy: Naw. We’re human.

Thunder: That’s nice. We’d better move on to a new guest though. I’m glad we were able to have this little talk.

Izzy: Me too. See you tomorrow.

Mew: Right. Bye!

(He walks off the stage)

Ken: Who do you want next?

Thunder: We’ll take... Sora.

Ken: Ok.

(Sora walks onto the stage)

Mew: Hi.

Sora: Hello. How are you guys?

Thunder: Great. How are you?

Sora: Good. Anything interesting happen to you lately?

Mew: Not really. I heard you got a boyfriend.

Sora: Yeah. I got new shoes too.

Mew: Really!? Are they cool?

(Mew and Sora start talking about shoes)

Thunder: Great. They’re talking about shoes. They are such girls.

Mew: They’d look really nice in blue.

Sora: I thought so too, but they only had green.

Thunder: Uhhh.. Ladies. We kinda have a show to do so...

Mew: Oh right! Sorry. So, how is your Pokémon training going?

Sora: Good. I caught a Pidgey yesterday.

Thunder: Wow. How many Pokémon do you have now?

Sora: 12 I think.... yes. 12.

Mew: That’s great. Do you have any badges?

Sora: I have a Rainbow Badge and that’s it. Izzy has 3 though.

Mew: Really? He didn’t mention that.

Sora: The rest of us only have 1. He doesn’t like to brag.

Thunder: That’s Izzy for you. Have you talked to Mimi lately?

Sora: Yeah. She gets kinda annoying after awhile though. She just talks about how wonderful the US is and all that nonsense.

Mew: How do you like the new Digidestened?

Sora: They’re okay. Yolei is nice, but she’s a real nag. And Cody is way too quiet. We used to think he was kind of a mix between Joe and Izzy, but he’s really nothing like either of them. And Davis. Where do I begin? Davis is... He is really nice, but he’s a little to.... loud. And Ken. Ken is a strange one. I like him and all, but he’s kinda weird. In the best way though.

Thunder: I think it’s so nice that you all have such interesting opinions of each other.

Sora: I guess that’s a good thing.....

Mew: Too bad you don’t hate each other and wish death upon each other. That’d make a very Jerry Springer-like episode.

Sora: It would. However, I think those Cardcaptor kids are way more dysfunctional than we are.

Thunder: I hear that. Say, I wonder what’s keeping Mew Two.

Mew: Maybe he’s having trouble finding Madison.

Thunder: Maybe you should help him.

Mew: Ok! I’ll be back!

(She teleports away)

Thunder: Ken! You’re taking CO-host. Stingmon, you do stage manager!

Ken: Ok.

(He walks onto the stage and sits in Mew’s chair.)

Thunder: Ok. So any way, have you seen any good movies lately, Sora?

Sora: I haven’t seen a movie since I saw Shrek, and that was okay.

Thunder: I didn’t really like that. It was pretty lame.

Ken: I thought it was too predictable.

Thunder: Me too.

Sora: I thought it was sweet. Everything worked out so nicely in the end.

Thunder: That’s what Mew said. You too are too much alike.

Sora: How is that a bad thing?

Thunder: Never mind. So you didn’t see Pearl Harbor or any thing like that?

Sora: Nope. That looked long and boring.

Thunder: Agreed.

Ken: I don’t usually like war movies or love stories disguised as war movies.

Thunder: Me either.

Sora: Yeah. They’ve put out a lot of lame looking movies lately.

Thunder: Yeah. The only one I want to see is the Jackie Chan one. Jackie Chan rules!

Sora: He’s weird. All that kung-foo stuff. He’s going to kill himself one of these days.

Ken: And that will be a very sad day.

Thunder: Word.

Sora: Thunder, how come you can get off giving all your guests jobs on your show?

Thunder: We don’t give all of them jobs. Did I give you a job?

Sora: No.

Thunder: Do you want one?

Sora: Not now.

Thunder: Ok. Don’t say I didn’t ask. And if you want one later, we can find something for you.

Sora: Thanks, but you give a lot of guests jobs. I just don’t see why. They’re all celebrities. They should be able to find an acting job.

Thunder: The fact that they’re famous helps the show a lot. Ratings will go way up if I say a famous person is working for me. Say you like..... The Backstreet Boys.

Sora: Eeewwww!

Thunder: Just pretend.

Sora: Fine.

Thunder: Now If I say “The Backstreet Boys will fill my water glass on tomorrow’s episode” and you like them, wouldn’t it make you want to watch?

Sora: I guess.

Thunder: So if I say Ken from Digimon is my new bouncer, Ken fans will watch more thus raising ratings. Understand?

Sora: Yes. So that’s why your entire staff is actors.

Thunder: Exactly.

Ken: So hiring out of work actors like Tracey and that Van guy weren’t just out of the kindness of you heart?

Thunder: It was partially. Mostly actually because you never see either of them. Tracey beeps out swear words and Van goes to buy doughnuts. Those are very behind the scenes jobs.

Ken: Oh. So hiring me was a ratings booster.

Thunder: Kinda. We still like having you around, it just benefits us ratings wise also.

Sora: okay. I understand now.

Thunder: Good. I’m glad we had this talk. Let’s do it again sometime.

Sora: Okay. Bye!

(She walks off the stage)

Stingmon: Do you want Matt or Tai?

Thunder: You can pick Ken.

Ken: Okay. Send out.... Matt.

Stingmon: Matt it is.

(Matt walks onto the stage)

Thunder: Hi!

Matt: Hey. What’s up?

Thunder: Not a lot. You?

Matt: Same. Where’s Mew?

Thunder: Helping Mew Two find a guest we want to talk to. Ken taking her place till she comes back.

Matt: Neat. Do you know what you guys need?

Thunder: What?

Matt: A catchy theme song.

Thunder: True. We don’t have a theme song. Any suggestions?

Matt: Hmmmm.... Not now. I just thought I’d throw the idea at you.

Thunder: You have a band. You could make us one if you want.

Matt: Okay.

Thunder: Ok. You get on that.

Matt: I’ll start when I get home.

Thunder: Good. So, Do anything fun lately?

Matt: Not really. I did help Izzy fix my computer the other day.

Thunder: Yeah? Did you have an interesting conversations then?

Matt: Kinda.

Thunder: What about?

Matt: Pikachus.

Thunder: Really?

Matt: Yeah. That got me to thinking, where do Pikachus buy groceries? Can you answer that?

Thunder: Well, Kem buys the groceries where I live, but you were probably thinking in terms of wild Pikachus.

Matt: Yes.

Thunder: Well, Pikachus have little societies with stores and such just like people do. My mom goes to a store and picks everything up.

Matt: Cool. I have another question.

Ken: About Pikachus?

Matt: Yes.

Thunder: Go for it.

Matt: Do you live in trees? You’re from the forest, so I thought you must live in trees, but Izzy said he thought that was highly unlikely.

Thunder: Some live in trees while others live in burrows or bushes.

Matt: Did you live in a tree?

Thunder: Yes. It was a dead tree that my dad and his friends hollowed out. I shared a room with Lightning.

Matt: Is he your brother then?

Thunder: Yep.

Matt: I didn’t know that.

Ken: Neither did I. Are Mew and Mew Two related?

Thunder: Brother and sister.

Ken: I had no idea.

Matt: Does Mew evolve into Mew Two then?

Thunder: No. Mew Two is genetically mutated to put it simply. NEVER EVER mention that to him though unless you want to die.

Matt: Origin of Mew Two’s birth bad conversation topic. Got it.

Ken: Yeah.

Thunder: Any way, how’s T.K.?

Matt: He’s ok. He really wanted to come and apologize for his bad behavior on his last visit, but he had other plans.

Thunder: He was a little brat last time.

Matt: But he’s changed a lot since then.

Thunder: I’ll believe it when I see it.

Matt: I thought you’d say that. It is kinda hard to believe, but you met the season 1 T.K.. That one is so much different from the season 2 T.K..

Thunder: We’ll just see about that. So, how’s your Pokémon training going?

Matt: I have 11 Pokémon and a badge.

Thunder: That’s good. Which is your favorite Pokémon?

Matt: I’d have to say...... Kadabra. He’s tough.

Thunder: That’s nice.

Matt: You’ll have to watch yourself around Yolei.

Thunder: Why?

Matt: She’s become obsessed with Pikachu and any of it’s evolved forms, so Lightning should be careful. She tried to catch Ash’s Pikachu the other day. She has at least 4 of them. It’s crazy.

Thunder: That’s kinda scary...

Ken: Yeah.

Thunder: Do you have any Pokémon, Ken?

Ken: 10.

Thunder: I didn’t know that. Well, I’m glad we had this lovely talk.

Ken: You said similar things to Izzy and Sora.

Thunder: I AM glad we’re having these little talks. There’s so much I don’t know about you guys.

Matt: You’ll learn soon enough, Thunder. See you later.

Thunder: Right. Bye.

(He walks off the stage.)

Stingmon: And now, Tai.

(Tai walks onto the stage)

Thunder: Hello Tai.

Tai: Hi. How are you?

Thunder: Good. You?

Tai: Fine. What’s new with you?

Thunder: Not a lot. You?

Tai: Nothin’ here.

Thunder: How’s Kari?

Tai: Good. She can’t wait to see you guys again.

Thunder: She wasn’t bad last time was she?

Tai: No. That was T.K.. Kari was the one who sat in the corner crying.

Thunder: Oh yeah. I suppose she’s grown a lot since then too.

Tai: Definitely.

Thunder: How’s your Pokémon training going? I hear you’re really pushing everyone to keep it up.

Tai: Yeah. I’m doing okay. 15 Pokémon and a badge. I think I might try for another badge tomorrow.

Thunder: Who’s your favorite Pokémon?

Tai: Charmander. He’s so much like Agumon.

Thunder: So tell me Tai, how come you’re having a teenage identity crisis.

Tai: Izzy told you that?

Thunder: Yes he did. He didn’t word it like that though.

Tai: I wouldn’t call it an identity crisis. I know who I am, I just don’t know who my friends are.

Thunder: Why is that?

Tai: I don’t know. It’s just that sometimes I hate Matt and he’s supposed to be my best friend. You aren’t supposed to hate your best friend.

Thunder: Why do you hate him sometimes?

Tai: I just can’t stand people telling me how wonderful he is.

Thunder: That sounds like Davis’ friendship with T.K.. You’re a lot like Davis.

Tai: It is just like Davis and T.K. because Matt and T.K. are so similar.

Thunder: They’re brothers. They’re supposed to be similar. Davis says you’re like the brother he never had, so he’s going to be like you. The problem is you and Matt have the same leader typed personality, so you both have problems accepting it when your wrong, so you fight a lot. T.K. and Davis see you both as role models so they’ll be like you. Thus, they have the same problem you have.

(Everyone stares at Thunder. Stingmon and Lightning come from backstage to stare at him. The other guests follow)

Thunder: What?

Lightning: Dude, you just said something that is a lot more advanced than usual. Are you okay little brother?

Thunder: I’m fine.

Lightning: I think I better call mom or something because you must be sick.

Thunder: I’m not! I have a show to do so get back to your places everyone!

(Everyone goes back to where they came from)

Thunder: Gosh. I try to give Tai a psychological analysis and everyone thinks I’m sick.

(Lightning walks back out)

Lightning: Who are you and what have you done with my brother!?

Thunder: Cut it out!

Lightning: Dude! The Thunder I know doesn’t even know what the words “Psychological analysis” mean!

Thunder: I was reading a book on psychology I found around the house yesterday.

Lightning: That’s mine! I was looking for that.

Thunder: It was under the Nintendo.

Lightning: Oh. Ok. Carry on.

(He walks off the stage)

Tai: Wow Thunder. What you said actually made sense.

Thunder: I know. It suprises me too.

Tai: But if our conflicting personalities make us fight, how come we manage to be such good friends at the same time?

Thunder: People often look for qualities that they themselves poses in a person. If they find those things, they find it easier to become friends.

Tai: So we’re friends because we remind each other of ourselves?

Thunder: Exactly.

(Lightning peeks out from backstage)

Lightning: Uhhhhh... Thunder... You’re scaring me. I’m going to call Kem, Mom, a doctor, and the News people.

(He goes backstage)

Thunder: *sigh*

Tai: That’s so ironic.

Ken: The fact that the reason your such good friends is also the reason you seem like enemies?

Tai: Yeah.

Thunder: That’s life.

Tai: Thanks Thunder. I feel a lot better now.

Thunder: I wonder why Izzy didn’t pull all that psychology on you.

Tai: He’s always to technical. He uses lots of big words and I get confused. He probably tried but I didn’t understand. But that’s ok.

Thunder: Well Tai, I’m REALLY glad we had this talk. I just proved to the world that I’m not an idiot.

Tai: Good job Thunder.

Thunder: Thanks. I’ll see you later.

Tai: Right. Bye.

(He walks off the stage)

Stingmon: Mew and Mew Two, have returned.

Thunder: Well, get them and Madison out here.

Stingmon: Okay.

(Mew, Mew Two, and Madison walk onto the stage)

Ken: I’ll go now then.

Mew: You can stay Ken.

Ken: Where will you sit?

Mew: I can hover, dear.

Ken: Ok.

Mew Two: I hear you were quite the psychologist while we were gone, Thunder.

Thunder: Awww.. That was nothing. I was just helping Tai. Any way, Madison. How are you today?

Madison: Good. How are you?

Thunder: Great. Now Madison, Would we be correct if we said that you and Sakura are becoming more distant because of Li?

Madison: Well..... *sigh* Yes. Kinda.

Mew: So your friendship with Sakura is almost nonexistent these days?

Madison: (Starting to cry) Yes.

Mew Two: There’s no need to cry. Meilin feels just the way you do.

(He gives her some Kleenex)

Madison: Thank you, Mew Two. But everything was just fine until the stupid Clow cards came along! She always acts like she’s doing me a favor by bringing me along and then she totally ignores me! It’s all that stupid book’s fault! I’ve been spending more time with Kero then my so called best friend and her excuse is always the same!

(She starts crying even more)

Ken: Don’t feel bad, Madison.

Thunder: Yeah. You can always get a less emotionally abusive best friend.

Madison: But we were friends for so long! Those stupid cards did it! I blame them!

Mew Two: Why don’t you blame Li?

Madison: He used to hate her! She’s just too damn friendly! It’s not his fault at all!

Thunder: Stingmon!

Stingmon: Yes?

Thunder: Get Sakura out here.

Stingmon: Ok.

Mew: Now Madison, you tell her exactly what you told us.

Madison: Okay.

(Sakura walks onto the stage)

Sakura: What’s the matter Madison? Why are you crying?

Madison: You! You and you’re stupid Clow cards!

Sakura: What did I do?

Madison: You’ve just started ignoring me more and more ever since you started capturing those stupid cards!

Sakura: But I had to.

Madison: You had to ignore me and force me to hang out with Kero!? Do you know how it feels to be 12 years old and dragging a stuffed animal to Dairy Queen!? I look like a total nutcase! But do you care!? NO! You’re entire life is consumed by capturing the cards with Li! Well you know what!? I’m not going to take that from you any more!

Sakura: But-

Madison: But nothing! I’ve had it Sakura! I’m through with you! I’m going to get a best friend that cares that I exist! You can find someone else to ignore now!

Sakura: But Madison-

Madison: I don’t want to hear any more of your excuses Sakura! Ever since you got into this whole Clow card business you haven’t ever wanted me around! Well now you have your wish! You can do whatever you want and I won’t be in your way any more!

Sakura: But I had no idea that you felt that way, Madison!

Madison: Then you’re really stupid!

Sakura: You always seemed happy enough to me.

Madison: That’s because I didn’t want to complain, but now I’ve had enough! You can go on doing your Clow card crap with your new best friend and I’ll just go find someone else to hang around with!

Sakura: I’m sorry Madison. I didn’t want to stop being your friend over this-

Madison: It’s too late for that now Sakura. The damage has already been done and you can’t fix it, so just leave me alone!

(She walks off the stage. Everyone is silent for a moment. Then, Mew breaks the silence)

Mew: I hate to say I told you so, but I told you so.

Sakura: I honestly didn’t know.

Mew Two: Well maybe you should be more sensitive of the feelings of others.

Sakura: I guess. I’m going to leave now.

Mew: Ok. BYE!

(Sakura walks off the stage)

Thunder: Well, would you look at the time.

Mew: Another episode has come and gone, but don’t worry! We’ll be back tomorrow!

Thunder: With the “For once Thunder and Mew’s demented sense of humor won’t be in charge” Special! Take it away Ken!

Ken: Ummm... Okay... We’ll see you then. Goodnight everyone!

Mew: Good job Ken. You’d make an excellent CO-host.

Ken: Thanks.

Thunder and Mew: BYE EVERYONE!

That’s it for today’s episode of The Pikachu and Mew Show. Tune in tomorrow to see episode 22: The “For once Thunder and Mew’s demented sense of humor won’t be in charge” Special! Good night everyone.