Thunder: Hello and welcome to Episode 25 of The Pikachu and Mew Show!

Mew: We have a great show for you today! We have a whole new set of guests AND they’re going to show us some really neat stuff!

Thunder: But first, the essay contest winner!

Mew: Okay. Before we say the person’s name, we’ll read their essay. And here it is:

Hi Thunder and Mew, or Mew and Thunder. Who’s name should I say first? Will you be mad if I say it wrong? Oh never mind that. I probably won’t win any way. I think you guys should interview me because I am the most interesting person in the whole world! Why do I say this? Because it’s true! I can talk about a hat for 3 hours if you want me to. I have lots of opinions on fun things and an interview with me would be a very interesting one. So would you please, PLEASE pick me! Thanks!

Thunder: This person begged so much so we decided, what the heck.

Mew: Here’s the runner up one:

Because.

Thunder: We really liked that one, and it was in the lead for a long time, but the first one proved to be a little better and showed more effort.

Mew: And the winner is..... Ashley K. . You know, that sounds vaguely familiar.

Thunder: It does...

Mew: Oh well, If it’s someone we don’t like, we’ll randomly take someone from the audience. Or the “Because” kid. By the way, We’ll talk to Ashley tomorrow. And now, for the show.

Thunder: On our show today is Gene and Jim from Outlaw Star, Karen and Shiro from the 08th MS Team, and Princess Zelda.

Mew: It was hard to find people that haven’t been on the show before. We just love our usual guests so much!

Thunder: Any way, Lets start the show!

Mew Two: You had to go and make this difficult, didn’t you?

Mew: What?

Mew Two: Because you 2 wanted to see it so badly, The Outlaw Start is parked in front of the studio! We had to shut off a mile of street in every direction because of it! And the mayor is not happy.

Mew: Why did you have to shut off so much?

Mew Two: In an attempt to hide it. You need to look at the ship quick so they can get it out of here!

Thunder: Okay. Come on. Lets go outside then.

(We go outside and see a big space ship in the middle of the street. Gene and Jim were standing in front of it.)

Mew and Thunder: HI!

Thunder: Did you really have to park this he- Oh no.....

Mew: What?

Thunder: The Mobile Suit. It has to be almost as big as this...

Mew: Uh-oh....

Thunder: You start the interview, I’ll go talk to the mayor.

Mew: Okay. Hi Gene and Jim.

Gene: Hi cat thing.

Jim: She’s a Mew, Gene.

Gene: And I’m supposed to know what a Mew is?

Jim: You agreed to come on her show and you didn’t even have the decency to learn about the hosts!?

Gene: Is that a bad thing?

(Jim gives him a very irritated look)

Mew: NO! It’s okay. He wouldn’t be the first person to not know what I am. It’s really okay.

Jim: You really shouldn’t excuse his stupidity like that.

Gene: I’m not stupid. I just don’t care about much of anything.

Jim: *sigh* You wanted to look at the ship, didn’t you?

Mew: Yeah. In an attempt to hide it we had to close a lot of streets and the mayor is pissed, so we have to get rid of it fast.

Jim: Okay. Come on. I’ll show you around it.

Gene: What am I supposed to do?

(Jim hands him a book)

Jim: Read this and learn what Pikachus and Mews are.

Gene: That’s no fun!

Jim: It’s not very fun to know that your guest doesn’t even know what you are either.

Gene: I guess you have a point.

Jim: Good. Now sit and read. Come on Mew.

(Mew and Jim begin walking around the ship)

Mew: Just to tell you, I know nothing about space ships, so you can’t use technical words or you’ll lose me.

Jim: Okay. This is the back of the ship.

Mew: Ooohhhh....

Jim: This is a door.

Mew: Ooohhhh....

(We go around to the front of the ship)

Jim: This is the front of the ship. And this is also a door.

Mew: Why do you have 2 doors?

Jim: I don’t know. I didn’t build the ship. This is a rocket launcher.

Mew: Ooooohhhh!

Jim: Here’s a lazer cannon.

Mew: Ooooohhh! I like weapons.

Jim: We have lots of them.

(We walks around and Jim points out all the various weapons)

Jim: Now before we go inside, let’s check on Gene.

(We walk over to Gene)

Gene: “Mew is a psychic type Pokémon” What the heck does that mean?

Mew: How’s it going?

Gene: I have no idea what any of this means. I skipped over most of the Pikachu chapter because none of it made any sense.

Jim: What made no sense?

Gene: Okay. The use this weird word. Ummm.. Pokémon. What’s that?

Mew: It’s the words “Pocket Monster” blended together.

Gene: Where does the funny “e” come in?

Jim: It’s for pronunciation purposes, Gene.

Gene: Oh. Okay. Well, what’s a Pocket Monster then.

Jim: *sigh*

Mew: It’s okay, Jim. Calm down. Now, Gene, a if you want to be technical, I am a monster. The phrase “Pocket Monster” is used because we live in small balls that fit into your pocket.

(She flips pages in the book until she finds a picture of a Pokéball)

Gene: You live in that?

Mew: Only if we’ve been captured by a trainer.

Gene: Do you have a trainer?

Mew: Yes. But she doesn’t make me stay in one of those. Is this making any sense to you?

Gene: A little. So a Pokémon in a monster that lives in a funny little ball thing.

Mew: Not all Pokémon live in balls. Some live in the wild.

Gene: But if they aren’t in a ball, they can’t fit in your pocket, so they’re just monsters.

Mew: No. They’re still Pokémon. You see, it’s the ability to be captured in a ball that makes you a Pokémon.

Gene: Okay! I get that! But why does the book say you are a psychic Pokémon?

Mew: Because Pokémon come in different kinds.. Like ice cream!

Jim: Ice Cream?

Mew: Yes. You can pretend each type is like a flavor.

Gene: There are chocolate type Pokémon?

Mew: No, no. There are 17 types of Pokémon: Normal, Fire, Water, Grass, Psychic, Electric, Ground, Flying, Rock, Fighting, Dark, Steel, Bug, Ghost, Poison, Ice, and Dragon. Every Pokémon is at least one of these, but some are 2 of these. Do you understand?

Gene: So you’re psychic flavored?

Mew: You could put it that way.

Gene: And Thunder is electric flavored!

Mew: Yes!

Gene: See Jim! I told you I’m not stupid. I’m learning.

Jim: Okay Gene. *sigh*

Gene: I still don’t understand 1 thing.

Mew: What’s that?

Gene: You said Pokémon only come in 17 flavors, but this book has 251 chapters. 1 for each kind. How does that work?

Mew: Okay. There are 251 SPECIES of Pokémon. Those 251 species each fit into a flavor group.

Gene: Like an Electric group and a Psychic group?

Mew: Yes!

Gene: Okay! I get it now! This isn’t so hard after all!

Mew: I knew you could figure it out!

Jim: Should he really walk around saying that you’re psychic flavored.

Mew: He can learn to replace the word “flavored” with “type”. I just used it to help him learn.

Gene: Wow! Pokémon are fun! I know loads about them now. Thanks Mew!

Mew: Any time. But we need to get the ship out of here soon, so lets finish looking at it.

Gene: I’m going to look at this book some more.

Jim: I’ve never seen you that interested in a book before.

Gene: I’ve never actually found a book that didn’t suck before.

Jim: *sigh* Come on Mew.

(We go inside the Outlaw Star with Mew and Jim)

Jim: Up there is where we all sit when we fly the ship.

Mew: Can I look in there?

Jim: Sure.

(We go into the cockpit)

Jim: That’s the computer that tells us what’s going on in and around the ship. His name is Guillaim.

Mew: Can I say hi to him?

Jim: Sure. He should be on.

Mew: Hi Guillaim!

Guillaim: Hello Mew. Hello Jim. Where is Gene? Is it time to go?

Jim: Gene’s reading outside. We aren’t ready to go just yet. I was showing Mew around the ship.

Guillaim: Okay. I’ll continue to wait until you are ready to go.

Mew: Guillaim, what exactly do you do?

Guillaim: I am the main computer of the Outlaw Star. I do minor repairs on the ship, monitor our surroundings for other ships and such, and I help with the navigation.

Mew: How do I make you do stuff?

Guillaim: What do you want me to do?

Mew: Ummmm.... Check the engine for damage.

Guillaim: Which one?

Mew: All of them.

Guillaim: Okay. One moment please...... I detected no damage to any engine.

Mew: Cool! Do you pick up anything on your radar or what ever you use to detect ships?

Guillaim: All I see around me are buildings. Then roughly 1 mile out I’m picking up several small crafts. They appear to be automobiles.

Mew: Sweet! You are so much cooler than On Star!

Jim: You mean that computer they put in to some cars?

Mew: Yeah! I want a Guillaim!

Jim: Almost all ship computers are like him.

Mew: But he’s even polite! “One moment please...”! He’s cool! You guys are so lucky.

Guillaim: Jim, I am detecting a large craft flying towards us. It appears to be a giant robot of some kind.

Jim: Can you put it on screen?

Guillaim: Just a moment....

(The screen turns on and shows a picture of the blue sky. A small spec is in the center)

Jim: Magnify that image.

(The spec becomes bigger)

Jim: Again.

(The spec begins taking a shape)

Jim: Maximum magnification.

(The spec turns into a Gundam)

Mew: Oh no!

Jim: What is that?

Mew: It’s a mobile suit. That’s our next guests. Where are we going to put them?

Jim: How long till it gets here?

Guillaim: Roughly 5 minutes and 25 seconds.

Jim: Can you get the ship into orbit before then?

Guillaim: Yes. Should I?

Jim: Yes. I’ll send for you when we’re ready to be picked up.

Guillaim: Understood. Starting engines.

Jim: Unless you want to go into space with the ship, we need to get off.

(Mew and Jim take us off the ship)

Gene: What is going on!?

Jim: Their next guest is on the way, and they’re coming in a big robot thing so the Outlaw Star needs to move. I told Guillaim to take it up and I’d call him when we’re done.

Gene: Okay. We should get away from it now. I don’t want to be too close when it takes off.

Jim: Agreed.

(We move away from the ship and watch it take off.)

Mew: Neat! Too bad Thunder missed this. He loves stuff like this.

(We hear the computer’s voice again)

Guillaim: The mobile suit should arrive there soon. Make sure you don’t let it step on Gene.

Mew: Awww! How sweet! He cares about you guys!

Gene: Why did he think it’d step on me.

Jim: Think about it smart guy.

Gene: Are you implying that I’m dumb and would get myself into such a stupid mess?

Mew: I think so, dear. But that’s okay. We love you any way.

Gene: I am not stupid! Hey!? What’s that?

Mew: The mobile suit. Right on time too.

Jim: Amazing! That is so totally awesome!

(Mew Two Walks outside)

Mew Two: They called to say they were almost here. I was coming to tell you. I’m glad you got that ship out of the way. Oh yes! And the mayor is really, REALLY mad. He wants us to open up most of the streets.

(The Gundam begins it’s landing)

Mew: LOOK AT THAT THING! IF WE OPEN UP THE STREETS, EVERYONE WILL SEE IT!

Mew Two: I KNOW! BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE! THE LAST THING WE NEED IS TO GET INTO TROUBLE WITH THE MAYOR!

Mew: BUT WE PROMISED OUR GUESTS WE’D TRY TO HIDE THEIR SHIPS SO THEY WOULDN’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT PEOPLE GETTING TOO CLOSE TO THEM!

(The engines on the Gundam stop)

Mew Two: That’s better. Now Mew, I’m sure all of Viridian City saw the monster landing here. And if you didn’t notice, people are already staring out of windows. The best we can do is close the street the thing is on and keep Ken and the security team patrolling the street.

Mew: I am so not voting for this jerk come the next election. Do what you have to. I’ll deal with the mayor later.

Jim: That thing is really neat! I’ve never seen anything like that!

Gene: I bet they fight with it. Do they fight with it, Mew?

Mew: Yes. It’s a state of the art mobile suit they use to fight wars and such.

(A door in the chest of the mobile suit opens. Someone steps out)

Karen: Hello!? Mew! Is that you down there!

Mew: Yes! HI!

Karen: Hi! Sorry we’re late! We got lost and landed in the wrong place! We felt pretty dumb there!

Mew: At least you made it okay! Why don’t you come down here now!

Karen: Okay! Just a second!

(The door closes and the Gundam kneels down. The door opens and the people inside come out)

Mew: Yay! Thunder is going to be so happy you’re here! Let me go get him!

(She teleports away. A few minutes later she comes out the door dragging Thunder who is yelling into a cell phone)

Thunder: YOU WILL NOT! Like hell you will! If you so much as try- AHHHHH! It’s here! It’s here! It’s here! What!? Shut up! I’ll do no such thing! Look jerk! I have a show to do so shut up! You just lost my vote you jerk.

(He hangs up the phone.)

Mew: You were talking like that to the mayor?

Thunder: Yes. He is a prick and I don’t like him. Any way, I’m mad that he made me miss the Outlaw Star. I wasn’t about to go and miss the Gundam because of him.

Mew Two: Do you need anything before I go back inside?

Mew: You’re staying out here. Oh my gosh! I almost forgot to tell you guys! I taught Gene about Pokémon all by myself!

Gene: Yeah. Comparing them to ice cream worked really well. That was 10 whole minutes ago and I still remember all of it!

Mew Two and Thunder: Ice Cream?

Jim: They 17 types are like ice cream flavors.. You know. She has him saying that you’re “Psychic Flavored”.

Mew Two: That’s a new one on me. Oh well. Good job Mew.

Mew: Thanks. It got me thinking. I should teach people about the world of Pokémon. I know loads about Pokémon and I want to share my knowledge with the people that don’t know.

Thunder: That’s a great idea Mew. You do that. So, Hi guys. Did you get here okay?

Karen: Well, we got lost-

Shiro: Twice.

Karen: The first time was your fault.

Shiro: It was not!

Mew: It doesn’t matter! The point is you got here.

Thunder: Show me the Gundam! I want to see the Gundam!

Mew Two: Calm down Thunder.

Thunder: But I want to see it!

Mew: And you will. You just need to be patient.

Thunder: Fine. Ummmm..... I have no questions! GUNDAM NOW!

Karen: Okay!

Thunder: I want to go inside! Let me go inside!

Jim: He’s kind of a spaz, isn’t he?

Mew: You don’t know the half of it.

Mew Two: You should see him at all you can eat buffets.

Mew: Oh yeah. You haven’t seen spaz till you’ve seen that.

Thunder: MEW! TOUR NOW!

Mew: Okay, okay. I’m coming, I’m coming. You guys can wait here till we’re done. Unless you’re hungry or you want to come along. If you want something to eat, there’s some food inside and-

Gene: I’m there!

(He runs inside)

Jim: I better make sure he chews. You won’t believe what happened last time we went on a talk show. He nearly choked to death on his complementary ham sandwich.

(He walks inside)

Mew: And you come with me!

(She drags Mew Two over to the Gundam. )

Thunder: Okay! They’re here! Let’s start!

Mew: You calm down or I’ll tell them to take this away.

Thunder: But I want to get a tour now!

Mew Two: But you’re acting like a hyperactive 3 year old.

Mew: Just calm down. Don’t make me get out the sedatives.

Thunder: Okay.

Karen: Are you ready now?

Mew: Yeah. We’re good.

Karen: Good. Okay. As you already know, this is a mobile suit. You use it to kill stuff.

Shiro: Don’t be too technical with your explanations now.

Karen: Shut up. What do you do with this? You kill stuff. Am I right?

Shiro: Of course (sarcasm).

Karen: You don’t like how I’m doing this!? You do it then!

Mew: Shhhh! No fighting. Kill stuff worked just fine, thank you. You may continue.

Karen: Okay then.

Mew Two: What kind of fuel does this use?

Shiro: Gas.

Karen: Yeah. Some of them do use nuclear reactors, though.

Mew Two: Oh. What does that number there mean?

Karen: That’s what team the Gundam is with.

Thunder: Does this one have a lazer sword thingy?

Shiro: We didn’t bring it. We were running late enough as it was.

(He glares at Karen)

Karen: Excuse me!?

Mew: SHUT UP! Can you go 30 seconds without fighting!?

Shiro: Probably not.

Mew: *sigh*

Thunder: When something big breaks on this, like the entire head for instance, how do you fix that?

Karen: You get a new head.

Mew Two: Do they sell those at Wal-Mart or something?

Shiro: No. It’s constructed with lots of smaller parts, then they would attach it to the Gundam.

Mew Two: What’s in the head if you sit in the chest?

Karen: Cameras.

Mew: That’s it?

Karen: Pretty much. There might be a gun or something there too, but that’s about it.

Thunder: Is it hollow?

Shiro: Not entirely.

Karen: There are pipes and stuff there too.

Mew Two: How do you operate that thing? Is it anything like a plane or a space ship?

Karen: Not really. There are a lot more screens to watch and buttons to push in this. We can go look if you want.

Mew Two: Okay.

Thunder: You’re getting in to this as much as I am.

Mew Two: But I’m not being a spaz about it.

(Thunder glares at him. Then they all go to look at the cockpit.)

Mew: There’s not a lot of room, is there.

Karen: Only 1 person is needed to operate it, so they only made enough room for one person.

Thunder: wow. Look at all the buttons. What does that one do?

(He points to a green button)

Shiro: That starts the engines.

Thunder: What does that button do?

(He points at a red button)

Karen: That turns on the middle screen.

Mew: How come the controls over here are the same as the ones over by Mew Two?

Shiro: Those are for the left arm and the others are for the right arm.

Mew: Oh! That makes sense.

Thunder: Which button do you push to shoot stuff?

Karen: Those ones there and those ones over there. That lever would control the sword if we had it.

Thunder: Can I blow up that building?

Shiro: I think you’re in enough trouble with the mayor as it is. Destroying part of the city won’t help you any.

Thunder: I guess.

Mew: This is really complicated looking. Did you have to take classes on how to operate these?

Karen: No. They gave us the instruction manual and told us to figure it out.

Mew: Are all Gundams the same?

Shiro: Mostly.

Mew: Are all mobile suits the same?

Karen: No. The enemy has this weird kind that are powered by nuclear reactors. They’re really ugly.

Mew Two: All the mobile suits on your side are the same, though?

Karen: Yeah. Some of the newer ones are slightly bigger, but other than that they’re the same.

Thunder: Cool.

Mew: Do you have a computer on here that talks to you?

Shiro: I wish. You have to read everything yourself.

Mew: The Outlaw Star’s computer talks to you. It’s even polite! I told it to check the engines for damage and it said “one moment please”.

Karen: Well, ships are very different from mobile suits. They are way easier to operate, and then to make it easier, you get a talking computer. Anyone with half a brain could fly a ship.

Shiro: I guess that rules you out.

Karen: I was trying so hard to be nice to you and you have to go and make this difficult!

Mew: Who wants some cake!?

(everyone looks at her)

Thunder: I do!

Mew: Okay! Lets all go get cake!

Karen: Ummmmm..... sure. But, shouldn’t we move this so you don’t get into any more trouble?

Mew: Okay. I’ll go with you. Shiro can go with Mew Two and Thunder and that way you’ll stay out of trouble.

Karen: HE needs to stay out of trouble!

Mew: And he will! Lets just go.

Mew Two: Yeah. Why don’t you take it into the forest, Mew.

Mew: Kay! Come on!

(Thunder, Mew Two, and Shiro go into the studio, while Mew goes with Karen to move the Gundam. We go into the studio with the others and find Jim sitting next to the food table reading while Gene is stuffing his face)

Jim: Gosh Gene. Will you slow down already!? The food’s not going any where.

Gene: When I want your opinion, I’ll ask for it.

Thunder: Chill out, Gene. Are you enjoying yourselves?

Jim: Watching Gene eat like the pig he is really isn’t that enjoyable.

Gene: I’m having a great time!

(Van walks up to them)

Van: Thunder, Princess Zelda is waiting for you in the guest room.

Thunder: Gosh. I think we should wait for Mew to get back before we interview her for real, but tell her to come here and talk to us for awhile.

Van: Okay.

(He walks down the hall out of sight.)

Mew Two: You really should sit down while you eat, Gene.

Gene: Don’t you start being a nag now too. Man! What is it with you people today.

Mew Two and Jim: *sigh*

Thunder: Will you please sit down, Gene? Please?

Gene: Okay.

(He sits down)

Shiro: You should probably slow down too. You’ll be sick if you don’t.

Gene: Now people I don’t even know are nagging me. What is this!?

Thunder: It’s nothing, really. We’re just watching out for your safety.

Gene: Fine. Have it your way. I won’t eat so fast.

Thunder: Thank you.

(Zelda and Van walk up to them)

Van: *sigh* Can I get you anything else?

Zelda: That will do.

Van: Okay.

(He disappears down the hall again)

Thunder: It takes an awful lot to irritate him. What did you tell him to do, Zelda?

Zelda: He acts like asking for water that is exactly 45 degrees is too much ask.

(Everyone looks at her)

Zelda: What?

Mew Two: How can you tell if the water is warmer or colder than that?

Zelda: I just know. At my castle, they get my stupid water with out complaining, but I come here and that becomes a problem all of the sudden.

Thunder: Well, Van isn’t the one that gets the water and stuff normally.

Zelda: What does he do then?

Thunder: What ever Mew tells him to. He’s Mew’s gopher and she gets mad is other people push him around.

Zelda: All I did was ask for water.

Mew Two: That’d be fine, but you had to add the 45 degree part.

Zelda: I’m sure Mew will live.

Thunder: She will. But it bugs her to see other people push him around like that.

Jim: How come he’s Mew’s gopher?

Mew Two: That’s what she says and none of us are dumb enough to question her.

Thunder: It’d be cruel of us to ask him to do to much any way.

Gene: Why?

Mew Two: Mew keeps him busy enough on her own.

Thunder: (Imitating Mew’s Voice) “Go get me that Barbie!”, “Get Ash on the phone!” , “Are those cakes done yet!?”, “I thought I told you to re-stuff my chair!” I feel so sorry for him.

Zelda: Mew sounds very bossy.

Mew Two: I’d debate weather or not you should talk.

Zelda: I am not bossy!

Thunder: That’s not what Link said.

Zelda: And what exactly did he say?

Thunder: He said you were very bossy.

Zelda: He’s just bitter because he’s lazy and had to get up and save the world all by himself. His opinions don’t count.

Mew Two: I’ll make sure to tell him you said that.

Zelda: Go ahead.

(Van walks up to them with a glass of water)

Van: Here.

(she takes the glass from him.)

Zelda: This is too cold. Try again.

Van: You didn’t even drink any yet!

Zelda: The glass is too cold. I don’t want to hold a cold glass. Then my hands gets cold.

(Van glares at her)

Mew Two: Why don’t I go get that.

(He takes the glass and teleports away.)

Thunder: You want some cake, Van?

Van: No thank you. I have to finish the list of stuff Mew gave me to do.

Thunder: Let me see it.

(Van gives him the list)

Thunder: This is insane! What does she need a hat for?

Van: I don’t question her, I just do what I’m asked. I’ll see you later.

(He takes the list and leaves.)

Thunder: Mew’s a slave driver. I’ll have to talk to her about that. *sigh* Any way, are you guys having fun?

Gene: (with his mouth full) I’m having a great time!

Jim: *sigh* As good a time as I can considering Gene is making an idiot of himself as usual.

Shiro: Sure.

Zelda: No. I want my water!

Gene: Gosh lady, Mew Two is getting it. You really should chill out.

Zelda: What do you know about anything any way!? Mind your own business!

Thunder: Chill Zelda! He was just trying to tell you to be less impatient.

Zelda: I am not impatient! I ALWAYS get WHATEVER I want WHENEVER I want it. Why should today be any different?

(Everyone looks at her)

Zelda: Foolish peasants. You’re all the same. Everything sounds unreasonable when you have to do something. And then to go and make things worse, you’re all male. That means you’re lazy and stupid. Gosh!

(They all look at her again. Mew Two comes back)

Mew Two: Here.

(She takes the glass. She holds it for a minute, then she finally drinks some of it)

Zelda: Perfect! Thank you! At least 1 of you is good for something.

(They all look at her. Mew Two is confused because he doesn’t know what’s going on, one of Thunder’s ears is twitching, Jim is tapping his fingers on the table, Gene is trying to decide weather to make a smart assed comment or eat some more, and Shiro is just shaking his head. Mew and Karen appear next to them. They look around at everyone. After surveying the group, Mew speaks)

Mew: You know Karen, I think we missed something.

Karen: Uh-huh.

Thunder: Mew, come here please.

Mew: Okay.

(They walk down the hall. We follow)

Thunder: (whispering) Can we not talk to Zelda?

Mew: (whispering) What happened?

Thunder: (Whispering) She’s irritating as hell! She said I was lazy and stupid! Although not directly.

Mew: (whispering) What happened?

(He tells her about the events that occurred during her absence)

Mew: (Yelling) SHE DID WHAT!?

Thunder: (whispering) SHHHH! She was ordering Van around and she was being a total witch to everyone. I say we pretend we’re out of time so she leaves.

Mew: (Yelling) I SAY WE KILL HER!

(Everyone looks over at them)

Mew: Uhhhhh....... I said- Ummmm..... I say we protest fur.

(Everyone except Thunder gives her a weird look. Thunder just shakes his head)

Thunder: (whispering) Any way, lets just make her go home ‘cause she’s mean.

Mew: (whispering) Fine. I’ll take care of her. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (The laugh was loud)

(Everyone looks at Mew again. She just smiles evilly and walks over to them.)

Mew: Oh Zelda! I need to show you something. It’s very important.

Zelda: What is it?

Mew: Wait and see. Just come on.

Zelda: I’m very busy and I don’t have time for this. Will you just do the stupid interview so I can leave?

Thunder: How about you just leave?

Mew: SHHH! Just come. It’ll only take a second.

Zelda: Fine.

(They disappear. 5 minutes later, Mew returns laughing evilly and hysterically. What a combination)

Thunder: What did you do, Mew?

Mew: Wouldn’t you like to know.

Shiro: Ummmm... Yeah. I think that’s why he asked.

Mew: Well....

(She pulls out what looks like a Barbie package, only....)

Mew Two: You turned her into a doll!?

Thunder: And you packaged her!? She’ll die! And sue!

Mew: No she won’t. There’s plenty of air in there. And there’s an air hole in the back.

Shiro: Is this what you do to all the guests you don’t like- Because if it is, I wanted to tell you how lovely you look today.

Mew: Oh Shiro! THIS was an extreme case. As long as you stay away from MY gopher, I’ve no quarrel with you.

(They all look at her)

Jim: Extreme? Extreme cases don’t come about often, do they?

Mew Two: No. She’s never done anything like this before. I guess she’s just really vexed today.

Thunder: Vexed? Since when do you use that word?

Mew Two: Since 12 year olds on Digimon 3 use it.

Thunder: That made you feel dumb when you heard her say it, didn’t it?

Mew Two: Not dumb, just... less intelligent. I decided to use big words as much as possible today.

Mew: Well you haven’t been making good on your vow as of yet.

Mew Two: Silence! I want to hear nothing else from you on the matter.

Mew: Fine. Well, what do we do now that Zelda’s a doll?

Thunder: We could talk to our remaining guests again.

Mew: Okay!

(We go to the stage. Mew and Thunder are in their chairs, Mew Two is off to the side, and Gene is sitting in the guest chair chewing something.)

Thunder: You’re still eating!?

Mew: Like you should talk.

Thunder: Shut up! So Gene, tell us about... Ummmm... your “business”.

Gene: You talk about it like it’s illegal or something.

Mew: You know what you do is barely legal.

Gene: What’s your point?

Mew Two: What exactly do you do?

Gene: Well, I run around looking for treasure to pay off my debts.

Mew: How’d you get so deep in debt any way?

Gene: Let’s just say that I’m not the world’s greatest pilot.

Thunder: You trash the ship a lot then?

Gene: Yes.

Mew: Who is dumb enough to keep lending you money?

Gene: My friend Fred.

Thunder: How much do you owe him?

Gene: A lot.

Mew: How much is that?

Gene: A LOT. That’s more than a good enough explanation.

Mew: We can give you a job if you want to earn some money.

Gene: Really? That’s nice of you. I did have this idea that Jim told me was bad, but-

Thunder: What is it?

Gene: Well, I thought since you’re all rich and stuff-

Mew: We aren’t going to loan you any money. That’d be mean of us.

Gene: No. I thought maybe I could sell you the Outlaw Star and use the money to pay off my debts, and then get a job to earn money to buy it back.

Mew: What do you want for it?

Gene: 3 million.

Mew: Hmmmmm..... You want us to buy it for 3 million dollars, then sell it back? How are you going to earn 3 million to buy it back?

Gene: That’s what Jim said.

Thunder: You better think about that for awhile, Gene.

Mew: I have an idea that will get Gene his money, and allow him to keep the Outlaw Star!

Gene: What is it?

Mew: Well, we’ve been wanting to take TPAMS from international to intergalactic, so we’ll buy the Outlaw Star from you for 3 million dollars, then hire you and your crew to take it around and hype our show!

Thunder: That’s a good idea, Mew!

Gene: You’d do that?

Mew: Yeah! We’d never want to take your ship from you. That’d be mean.

Gene: Great! I told Jim that it’d be a good idea to talk to you about this.

Thunder: How come you let Jim decide what you do? He’s 11 for goodness sake.

Gene: I don’t know. I really shouldn’t be taking orders from him.

Mew: But you have to admit, he DOES know better sometimes.

Gene: Sometimes. Say, can I ask you a question?

Mew: SHOW IDEA!

Thunder: What?

Mew: Almost every guest asks us questions, so why not make an entire episode devoted to guests asking us questions!

Thunder: Great idea, Mew! Write that down Mew Two!

Mew Two: Okay.

Mew: Ok. Any way, go ahead Gene.

Gene: Okay. I saw this episode of Pokémon one time, and there was this Pikachu and this Raichu, and they were fighting. Well, after I met Thunder and Lightning I thought “If Thunder and Lightning got into a fight, who would win?”. I was going to ask who’d win between Mew and Mew Two, but I saw the first movie.

Thunder: I don’t know.

(Lightning walks on to the stage)

Lightning: Actually brother, I would win. You don’t have the advantage Ash’s Pikachu had. I’d destroy you.

Thunder: Want to bet!?

Lightning: I know you aren’t challenging me.

Thunder: Like hell I’m not!

Lightning: Look, at the 9th Gym, we were taught to never decline a challenge, how ever, I don’t want to hurt you.

Thunder: You’re just scared.

Lightning: Like hell I am!

Thunder: Bring it then!

Lightning: Okay. Have it your way.

Mew: Yay! Battles are good!

Gene: I have another question.

Mew: Lets answer the first one first.

Gene: But I just wanted to ask why you only wait for your trainer to fight sometimes.

Mew: Well, she trains both of them, so it’s pointless for her to come.

Gene: Okay. Carry on.

(They move the chairs away so there’s room for the battle. Thunder and Lightning take their positions.)

Lightning: Are you SURE you want this?

Thunder: Shut up and fight!

Lightning: Fine.

Mew Two: Are both Pokémon ready?

Thunder: Yes!

Lightning: Word.

Mew Two: Okay. Then let the battle begin.

(Thunder immediately dives head first into Lightning. Amazingly, Lightning stands his ground and kicks Thunder away. Thunder tries the same move again and again but gets nowhere.)

Mew: Lightning is really strong! Thunder is so much bigger than him and yet he takes the hits like they’re nothing!

Lightning: Are you done with this foolishness yet?

Thunder: I’m going to show you and everyone else that I CAN beat you!

Lightning: Riight. Listen, Thunder. I’m so sorry that I have to do this to you. Please forgive me.

(Lightning starts with a thundershock. Thunder falls over.)

Thunder: Ow! That hurt!

Lightning: I’m sorry.

Thunder: That’s okay. Any way, Now I’ll show you!

(Thunder runs at him, but Lightning thunderbolts him.)

Thunder: OW!

Gene: Why does Lightning use electric attacks against another electric Pokémon? Isn’t that bad?

Mew: Usually. But since Lightning is so much smaller than Thunder, his physical attacks won’t do a whole lot.

Gene: But the electricity shouldn’t either.

Mew Two: Right. But Lightning’s highest stat is his special attack. His electricity will deal a considerable amount of damage because if that.

Gene: Oh!

(Thunder keeps getting up and attempting to body slam Lightning, but Lightning always thunderbolts him after managing to escape.)

Lightning: This is getting old. It’s time I finish this.

Mew: You aren’t going to use thunder are you? That’s way too strong and you know it!

Lightning: But he keeps getting up. If I give him everything I’ve got, then I know he’ll stop.

Mew: Just be careful!

(Lightning uses thunder on Thunder. It connects and Thunder falls over. Lightning walks over to him and pokes him with his tail. He doesn’t respond)

Lightning: Why isn’t he moving!?

Mew: What did you do, Lightning!?

(Everyone crowds around Thunder. Lightning pokes him some more)

Mew: If you killed him, you’re going to get it!

Mew Two: Yes. Kem will be furious.

Lightning: I told him not to challenge me!

Gene: But you didn’t have to use the strongest attack you know.

Lightning: That ISN’T the strongest attack I know!

Mew Two: That’s not important! The important thing is he’s not moving and needs medical attention.

Lightning: Right. Can you help me take him to the Pokémon center?

Mew Two: Of course.

Mew: Hey!? No one took me and Two to the hospital when we passed out.

Mew Two: Yeah!

Lightning: But you aren’t Thunder. He’s so fragile. He knows nothing about fighting and I probably did hurt him badly, so just take him.

Mew: Grrrr... Fine. But who will help me host!?

Lightning: Have Gene help you.

Gene: Can I?

Mew: Okay!

(Mew Two and Lightning disappear)

Mew: Okay Gene. Now we’re going to talk to Shiro and Karen. Do you know anything about them?

Gene: I know their names are Shiro and Karen. And that- ummmm... That’s about it.

Mew: Oh Gene! You’re so funny!

Gene: I’m not kidding.

Mew: I know. That’s why it’s funny. I’ll go get them. Just sit back and watch until you learn something about them.

Gene: Okay.

(Mew goes back stage. A few moments later, she returns with Shiro and Karen. Then Jim walks to where Mew Two would normally stand. He gets to be stage manager)

Mew: Okay. Now we’re all set.

Gene: What do you need a stage manager for? They’re your last guests.

Mew: The job of stage manager involves more than just sending out the next guest. the stage manager delivers messages from the stage crew and gets people on the phone for starters. They also do tons of other stuff, so we need one, just trust me.

Gene: Ummmmm..... Okay....

Mew: Good. Okay! How are you guys doing now?

Shiro: I’m still scared of you.

Mew: I already told you, if you leave my gopher alone, I won’t turn you into a doll.

Karen: But that fact that you turned Zelda into a doll is enough to scare someone.

Mew: I’ll turn her back later. Just relax.

Shiro: Okay.

Mew: So, tell us about yourself.... Shiro!

Shiro: Are you picking on me for a reason?

Mew: No.

Shiro: Okay. Ummm... What do you want to know?

Mew: Anything.

Shiro: Can’t you be just a little more specific?

Mew: Okay. What kinds of things do you like to do?

Shiro: Ummm.... I like to read.

Mew: Read? That’s boring. Don’t you do anything strange or interesting?

Shiro: Like....

Mew: Well, Cell from DBZ cooks, knits, and quilts. And Frieza raps and dances ballet.

Shiro: Oh. Well. I guess not.

Karen: He’s really boring. He just does what he’s told and reads books. He has no life of outside of that.

Gene: Do you ever need a life.

Mew: Be nice Gene. Even if that is true.

Shiro: I like the way things are. I stay happy and out of trouble.

Mew: Your character on the show is far more rebellious.

Shiro: My character on the show is an idiot. Not to mention a jerk.

Mew: Well, you could at least make some friends to hang out with.

Shiro: I have friends.

Mew: Name one.

Shiro: Ummmmm....... I’ll get back to you on that.

Gene: Mew is right. You need to go to a club or something.

Shiro: That’d be bad.

Mew: Nuh-nuh. sailor Neptune goes to clubs and stays out of trouble.

Karen: But then his imaginary friends might get lonely.

Shiro: you know what!?

Mew: SILENCE! There’s no need to pick on Shiro for being a dork. That’s just the way he is. That doesn’t make him a bad person, so leave him alone.

Karen: Okay fine. Talk to me then. I’m more interesting any way.

Mew: Fine. Do you do anything interesting in your spare time?

Karen: Well, I’m actually studying at home to become a private investigator.

Mew: Really?

Karen: Yeah. The military isn’t really working out for me. I’d much rather be a private investigator.

Mew: Why don’t you study at home to become a private investigator, Shiro?

Shiro: Because commercials for home study courses that air on daytime TV and are endorsed by washed up actors don’t sound very great to me.

Mew: What’s wrong with them?

Shiro: What isn’t wrong with them? How many respectable higher educational facilities advertise during “As The World Turns”, or was that a commercial for Harvard I saw during Jenny Jones yesterday? (sarcasm)

Mew: You were watching Jenny Jones!?

Shiro: No! I hardly ever watch TV, let alone TV before 6 PM.

Mew: Okay.

Karen: I’ll have you know that there is nothing wrong with learn at home programs.

Shiro: S- no wait. I think it’s in my best interest to just not say anything.

Mew: Very good. Well, I can tell this is going no where. So, we’ll announce tomorrow’s episode! Read this Gene.

Gene: Okay. Tomorrow on TPAMS- What’s TPAMS?

Mew: It’s the acronym for The Pikachu and Mew Show, dear.

Gene: Oh. Okay. Tomorrow on TPAMS, Thunder and Mew will interview the winner of the essay contest and some of your favorite guests. Apparently, they had Blossom the Charizard and Thunder the Raichu go around and ask people to tell them who they’re favorite guests are.

Mew: Yes we did! And we’re going to have them on the show! Also, we’ll check in on Matt and his band as they come up with our theme song, AND we’re going to announce a special suprise!

Gene: Tune in for all that and more tomorrow on The Pikachu and Mew Show! Bye! Was that good Mew?

Mew: Perfect! Bye everyone!

That’s it for today’s episode of The Pikachu and Mew Show. Tune in tomorrow to see all that great stuff that’s listed above!