Thunder: Hello and welcome to episode 48 of The Pikachu and Mew Show!

Mew: We have some good news and some bad news for you. Which would you like first?

Audience: Bad!

Thunder: Hmmmm . . . I would have thought "good." Oh well. Mew . . .

Mew: The bad news: Matt from Digimon's band broke up before they could finish our theme song.

Mew Two: How is that bad?

Mew: Hush!

Audience: What's the good news!?

Mew: Well, Thunder and I picked our own theme song!

Thunder: It was a tough choice. We liked lots of songs.

Mew: We had three we liked best.

Thunder: The first was "Gangsta's Paradise" by Coolio, but we decided that while we are bad a** "gangstas," we weren't quite "Gangsta" enough.

Mew: Then we thought "since most of those animés have theme songs that have little or nothing to do with the show, we can to." So we considered "Virtual Insanity" by Jamiroquai. That is one catchy tune!

Thunder: We ended up rejecting that because no would actually remember that song or the guy that sang it. We wanted something that everyone would know and love.

Mew: But then we remembered a song that suits us perfectly!

(The both run off the stage.)

Thunder: (from back stage) Mew Two! Music!

(Mew Two sighs loudly and starts the music. Thunder and Mew walk onto the stage to the "Imperial March" from Star Wars. They sit down in their chairs and let the song finish.)

Mew: So, from today on, we took the Darth Vader music as our theme song!

Mew Two: It's called the "Imperial March." And how much are you paying to use that?

Mew: $179. 95 and season tickets of some football team for the next 6 years.

Mew Two: That's kind of a lot of money.

Thunder: That music is worth every cent of it! But we have a show to do.

Mew: Right. Today we have Kenshin and Sanosuke, Hamtaro and Bijou, Kagome and Sesshomaru, Knives and Wolfwood, Giovanni, Michelle, Kaiba, Goku, Vegeta, Davis, Kuja, and his friend Maester Seymour.

Thunder: That's the guy with the gross outfit and bad hair, isn't it?

Mew: That's right.

Thunder: Okay. Wasn't there another guest?

Mew: Yep. We also agreed to have another talk show host on to help her promote her show. We decided that since she isn't in our time slot, we can help her out. Her name is Mystic, and I have absolutely no idea what she is. She's like a unicorn-bird-ampharos thing.

Thunder: She's a what?

Mew: You'll just have to wait and see for yourself.

Thunder: Okay. Who do we want to start with today?

Mew: I want to talk to Kuja and his friend.

Mew Two: Okay.

(Kuja and Seymour walk onto the stage.)

Kuja: Mew! How are you, my dear?

Mew: I'm fine, thanks! How are you?

Kuja: I'm great! Absolutely wonderful! What about you, Thunder?

Thunder: I'm okay.

Kuja: Excellent!

Mew: Introduce us to your friend!

Kuja: Okay! This is my dear friend Seymour Guado.

Mew: Hi, Seymour!

Seymour: Hello.

Mew: How long have you been friends with Kuja?

Seymour: Hmmmm . . . It's been quite awhile. At least 10 years.

Thunder: Aren't you the bad guy from Final Fantasy X that refuses to die?

Seymour: That's me! What do you think?

Thunder: About what?

Seymour: My performance.

Kuja: (to Thunder and Mew) Seymour is an actor and always wants to know everyone's opinions, but only if they're good.

Thunder: Okay . . . It was . . .

Mew: Amazing!

Seymour: You really think so?

Thunder: Uhhhh . . . Yeah. We do.

Seymour: Oh, you're too kind.

Thunder: *muttering* I know . . .

(Mew hits him)

Thunder: Ouch!

Mew: So, why don't you tell us a little about yourself, Seymour?

Seymour: Okay! Well, I am the leader of the Guado people. I killed my father to get the job.

(Thunder and Mew stare in horror at his comment.)

Seymour: What? I wouldn't have done it, but he was taking way to long to die. Father was a great man, he really was, and it really is too bad he had to die, but that's just the way it had to be.

(Thunder and Mew both try to speak, but no sound comes out of their mouths. Seymour either doesn't notice or doesn't care.)

Seymour: Then I decided I wanted to be Sin, the beast that terrorizes Spira, but I gave up that quest to become an actor.

Thunder: Ha- Have you been in anything we would know about?

Seymour: Well, I've stared in a few small stage productions. And I got to be an extra in Kuja's movie! I'm eating in a restaurant he walks past. You can see me in the window!

Mew: You have a movie, Kuja?

Kuja: Oh. It's just a little thing I made for my sister's birthday. It was called "Kuja: Your beautiful, talented, fantastic, wonderful, older brother who is perfect in every way".

Thunder: Wow. That's.... Quite a title.

Kuja: Yes. I wanted to capture every one of my fantastic qualities in the title. That will make them much easier for her to remember.

Mew: How old is your sister now?

Kuja: She just turned 17. I remember when I was 17. I had horrible hair back then.

Thunder: When was that?

Kuja: I shouldn't answer that, but I will. That was... *sigh* 5 whole years ago! I'm practically elderly!

Mew: Kuja, you're 22.

Kuja: I know! I feel so old!

Thunder: How is 22 old? Blossom is almost 22 and she never calls herself old.

Kuja: Blossom is already 22?

Mew: Pretty soon.

Thunder: Remember the second movie?

Kuja: Oh yes! The prophecy about 21 years earlier! That's right! Well, I guess 22 isn't that old, but it isn't young either.

Mew: You shouldn't feel bad about being 22, Kuja. It could be worse. You could be 57 like Giovanni.

Thunder: I thought he was only 35.

Mew: He is. I just like to tease him.

Kuja: No thank you. I'll stick with 22 for the time being.

Thunder: *sigh* Any way, what else is there to know about you, Seymour?

Seymour: Not much.

Mew: Don't you have to power to call nifty monsters or something like that?

Seymour: Oh. That summoning thing. Yeah. I can do that sometimes.

Thunder: What kinds of monsters can you summon?

Seymour: Well, I can summon what ever monster I want, but I tend to use Anima most of all.

Mew: What's Anima?

Seymour: Anima is a creature born from pain and suffering of my mother's spirit.

Kuja: That is just hideous. It is quite honestly painful to look at.

Seymour: Of course she is. There is nothing beautiful about pain and suffering.

Mew: What does Anima look like?

Thunder: Remember when Kem was playing Final Fantasy and Maester Seymour called the big monster with the chains and bandages that royally kicked the crap out of her about 49 times before she beat it?

Mew: Oh yeah! And she was getting so annoyed by Seymour that she started throwing things every time she had to hear "Feel my pain! Come Anima!"

Seymour: I take it this "Kem" person isn't a fan?

Mew: Of you? No.

Seymour: I didn't write the story. I merely act it out.

Thunder: It was your character's refusal to die that annoyed her, not your acting skills.

Mew Two: *muttering* Or lack there of....

Mew: Two! Stop that.

Mew Two: As you wish.

Thunder: So, what else do you want to tell us about yourself?

Seymour: Oh. I don't know. I don't think there's much else to say about me.

Mew: Okay then. What's up with you, Kuja?

Kuja: Me? Well, I was making that movie for my sister and helping mumsy plan the party. Oh! I almost forgot!

(He pulls a card out of his pocket.)

Kuja: These are your invitations to the party. I have another one for Kaiba. Is he here?

Mew: Not today, but I'm going to see him later and I can get it to him if you want.

Kuja: (giving her a second card) That would be just splendid! Than you so much!

Mew: Don't mention it! It's no trouble at all.

Thunder: Okay. Anything else?

Kuja: Nope.

Seymour: Nothing.

Mew: Well, we'll see you later, then. Thanks for coming, Seymour. And thanks for bringing him, Kuja.

Kuja: Forget it.

Seymour: Thank you for having me! I hope you invite me back sometime.

Mew: Of course we will! Bye!

(They walk off the stage.)

Mew Two: Next?

Thunder: I'll pick this time. Next we want Knives and Wolfwood.

Mew: That's fine with me.

Mew Two: Okay. Knives and Wolfwood.

(They walk onto the stage.)

Mew: HI!

Thunder: Hi.

Wolfwood: Hello.

Knives: (looking at them) You're not human, so I guess I'll talk to you. Greetings.

Mew: What's up?

Wolfwood: Nothing really.

Knives: You know. Just trying to destroy humanity and talk some sense into my idiot brother. What about you?

Thunder: Not much. Just hosting this talk show.

Knives: Good. Good.

Mew: You seem much friendlier than you did on the show.

Knives: I'm not really that cranky all the time! It's just my character.

Wolfwood: But you still hate humanity.

Knives: That's right. You humans are worthless pieces of garbage that need to be disposed of.

Mew: Sad! That's not a very nice thing to say at all.

Knives: Well, it's true. All humans do is move into a place, drain it's resources, and move on leaving death and destruction in their wake.

Mew Two: Hmmmmm.... He has a point.

Mew: Stop encouraging him!

Knives: I'm sorry- Mew, is it?

Mew: Yes.

Knives: I'm sorry, Mew, but I just don't like humans. They were mean to me. I don't understand how Vash can tolerate them.

Wolfwood: Maybe you have the problem and not everyone else.

Knives: I am not the problem. I am the solution.

Thunder: The solution?

Knives: Yes, Thunder. I am the solution. Problem: Humans. Solution: Destroy them. You aren't going to destroy them, so I will. That makes me the solution.

Mew: Ummmmm.... Okay... Can you sit tight for a minute while we talk to Mr. Wolfwood.

Knives: Certainly.

Mew: Thank you. So, tell us about yourself, Mr. Wolfwood. Are you the solution to something?

Wolfwood: No. I'm a priest. I travel around trying to earn money for my orphanage.

Knives: Till you die. Lousy human.

Mew: Can you please be quiet, Mr. Knives?

Knives: Yes. I'm sorry.

Mew: Thanks. So, you ran an orphanage?

Wolfwood: Yes. Nothing makes me happier than helping children.

Thunder: But then that other priest killed you.

Wolfwood: Yeah. I didn't want my character to die, but there were only 3 episodes left in the series, so I guess it was okay.

Mew: Weren't you supposed to capture Vash for Knives or something?

Wolfwood: Yeah... But Vash was such a nice guy. I couldn't bring myself to take him in.

Knives: Which resulted in your premature demise. Though I don't think it was premature at all. In fact, it was long over due.

Thunder: Mr. Knives...

Knives: Sorry.

Wolfwood: You know, Knives, you really should shut your mouth before I get angry.

Knives: You think you can take me human? Please. I'd kill you so fast-

Mew: Millions Knives! You stop that this instant!

(Knives looks at her)

Mew: Settle.

Knives: Fine.

Thunder: Okay. Where were we?

Mew: Mr. Wolfwood was telling us about how he couldn't take Vash to Knives.

Wolfwood: Yes. So I had to fight the guy Knives sent after me, and I was fatally wounded. That ended my character.

Mew: That's too bad.

Thunder: So, what do you do outside of the show?

Wolfwood: Just taking care of my orphanages.

Mew: You have more than one?

Wolfwood: Well, it's a chain. There are orphans everywhere that need a good home.

Thunder: Do you have one anywhere near here?

Wolfwood: Yeah. If I'm not mistaken, Mew Two volunteers at it. The orphanage just outside Viridian is one of mine.

Mew: That's where Giovanni found Andrea!

Wolfwood: Andrea? Hmmmmm....

Thunder: Do you know all your orphans?

Wolfwood: Oh yes. Let me think... Andrea in Viridian... She's kinda small, with light brown hair... and her favorite food is frosting... Vanilla frosting. With sprinkles.

Mew: Ummmmmm.... Wow.... You know all that about every kid in all your orphanages?

Wolfwood: Sure. It's tough, but you get to know them. And I know more about Andrea. I was there when she was adopted. She was adopted a few months ago by... Gosh. He was a big guy... Wore lots of orange. He looked like a mob boss and he came in with his mother.

Thunder: That's Giovanni.

Wolfwood: You talk to them?

Mew: All the time. We see Giovanni and Andrea almost every day.

Wolfwood: Great! How are they doing?

Thunder: They're fine.

Mew: Andrea likes her new home a lot.

Wolfwood: That's what I like to hear.

Knives: Typical humans. They don't even allow their weak to die. No wonder they are so over populated...

(Mew looks at Knives. He tries to act like he didn't say anything.)

Thunder: Okay. Before we finish your interview, I have to ask about your cross.

Wolfwood: You like that? Everyone thinks it's just a cross. No one ever suspects that it holds 8 guns and can cover as a rocket launcher.

Mew: Why do you have that?

Wolfwood: It's a tough world out there. You have to be prepared for anything.

Mew: Okay... back to Mr. Knives.

Knives: Hello again.

Thunder: Your character seemed... Very angry. Why?

Knives: Humans make me "very angry."

Mew: Why?

Knives: I find them to be disgusting creatures. The very sight of them upsets me.

Thunder: What is the deal with you and Vash, any way?

Knives: We're plants.

Mew: Plants?

Knives: Yes. We were created on the SEEDS ships.

Thunder: I always thought you were human.

Knives: Nope. We may look human, but closer inspection would reveal that Vash and I are far superior to human beings.

Mew: You said people were mean to you.

Knives: I did.

Mew: Why were they mean?

Knives: Because humans fear what they don't understand. They were afraid of what Vash and I were capable of, so they treated us badly in an attempt to hold us back. And look what it got them... They didn't stop us. They just made me angry, and now I have dedicated my life to destroying them all!

Thunder: But not all humans are as bad as you say.

Mew: Yeah. Do you actually know any humans?

Knives: I know all the ones I use to do my dirty work... And I observe them from afar all the time-

Mew: But do you actually KNOW any?

Knives: I- I don't.

Thunder: Well, I'm sure if you got to know them, you'd realize that they aren't so bad.

Knives: But they are just imperfect-

Mew: Now really. Who IS perfect?

Knives: I am. Vash is. I suppose you Pokémon things are pretty close-

Mew: No one is perfect, Knives. Everyone has their faults. Even you.

Knives: Me?

Mew: Yeah.

Knives: I have no faults. I am perfect.

Wolfwood: Oh, get over yourself!

Knives: (getting up) Excuse me!?

Wolfwood: (getting up) You heard me!

Mew: (Floating between them) Hey! Stop that!

Knives: No! It's time I rid the planet of this worthless piece of human garbage!

Wolfwood: I'd like to see you try!

Thunder: I'll take care of this! Piiiikaaaaachuuuu!

(He thundershocks both of them. They fall over.)

Wolfwood: Ow...

Knives: That wasn't good...

Mew: Are you 2 going to behave now?

Wolfwood: Yeah.

Knives: I suppose.

Mew: Okay then. I'm sorry it had to come to that, but you 2 need to learn to get along. I'd take you to teach you some getting along lessons, but I have a lot of guests to talk to, so I want you 2 to go backstage and I don't want to hear that you were fighting. Understand?

Wolfwood: Yeah.

Knives: Whatever.

Mew: (forming an energy ball in her paw) Millions Knives!

Knives: Okay, okay!

Thunder: Bye!

Knives and Wolfwood: Bye.

(They walk off the stage.)

Mew Two: Well, that went well.

Mew: Not really.

Thunder: Oh well. Who do you want to talk to now, Mew?

Mew: I want to talk to.... Hamtaro and Bijou.

Mew Two: Okay.

(Hamtaro and Bijou run onto the stage. They climb up a chair and sit on it.)

Mew: Hello!

Hamtaro: Hi!

Bijou: Hello.

Mew: Cute! She has a french accent!

Thunder: Can you speak french?

Bijou: Of course I can. I used to live there after all.

Mew: Cool! Did you like it there?

Bijou: Sure, but I like living here where I can hang out with the other Ham Hams so much more!

Thunder: I bet. So, tell us about your little hamster posse thing.

Hamtaro: Well, the Ham Hams are the group of all the hamsters that live in town. We meet at the club house and get into all sorts of fun adventures.

Mew: That sounds fun!

Thunder: How do you get together without your humans noticing?

Bijou: They don't watch us all the time. We just go out while they're at school and work and such.

Mew: Where do you get all those hamster sized furniture and clothing and stuff?

Hamtaro: Well, Panda is really good a building stuff, and the rest of us help make some of the other stuff like costumes and decorations and things.

Mew: That's so cute!

(Several guests run onto the stage.)

Thunder: Hey! It's not your turn yet!

Mystic: I decided to clear out the guest room because we had some trouble.

Giovanni: That weird guy and the priest are fighting.

Davis: Yeah. And that dude with the hair and the red jacket is trying to break it up.

Mew: Grrrrr.... I'll be back.

(She teleports away. Backstage, Knives and Wolfwood are being separated by Vash, who is trying to calm them both down.)

Vash: Hey guys! You don't want to fight! Love and peace, remember?!

Wolfwood and Knives: Shut up, Vash!

(Mew appears next to Vash.)

Vash: Mew! I'm so glad to see you! You have to help me stop them!

Mew: I thought I told you 2 to stop fighting!

Wolfwood: He started it! He kept calling me human garbage and talking about how he wanted to destroy me!

Knives: You ARE human garbage and I DO want to destroy you.

Mew: Damn it, Knives! Can't you at least pretend to like humans until you're out of my studio!? I can't have you starting fights while I'm trying to talk to people!

Knives: But he bothers me.

Mew: Vash! You better make him settle down or you aren't going to have a brother any more!

Vash: Listen, Knives, can't you please be good. Just for a little while. I mean, I want you to be good forever, but we can take this one step at a time-

Knives: You're an idiot, Vash.

Mew: That idiot kicked you’re a** on the show.

Knives: It was written that way.

Mew: He could take you now, too, and you know it!

Knives: Don't make me laugh!

Vash: Mew! You aren't helping!

Mew: I'm not... Sorry...

Vash: Please, Knives? Won't you please be nice?

Knives: When has talking to me like that ever gotten you what you want?

Vash: I don't understand you, Knives. Why do you only respond to anger and violence? Why do you do all the terrible things you accuse humans of doing?

Knives: How dare you compare me to those imperfect creatures!

Vash: It's true, Knives! You're no better than they are! Neither of us are! You need to stop talking like that and learn to get along with people!

Knives: You're going to have to make me.

Mew: Fine.

(She uses her powers to shrink him down until he's about 8 inches tall. Then she picks him up. He tries to jump off her paw, but she stops him.)

Mew: I'm going to keep you this way until you agree to get over yourself.

(Knives yells something but it's too hard to understand, as he's so small.)

Vash: Is he going to be okay, Mew?

Mew: Yeah. He's fine- Except his outfit. That's just awful! Let me fix that.

(She makes a box of doll clothes appear in front of her. She holds a squirming Knives in one paw and digs through the box with the other. Then she pulls out a dress.)

Mew: There! I like this!

(She pulls the dress onto Knives so it covers his other outfit. )

Mew: That's so cute! Now let me fix your hair... It's so short...

(She makes her Barbie Beauty Salon appear in front of her. She pulls out a wig and sets it on Knives. Then she begins styling it. Wolfwood and Vash just watch as she gives Knives a make over. When she finishes it, she holds Knives out to Vash and Wolfwood.)

Mew: Isn't he pretty!?

(Vash and Wolfwood exchange frightened and confused glances)

Vash: Sure, Mew. He's real pretty.

Wolfwood: Yeah...

Mew: Good! Now I'm going to bring him out with me. You 2 be good!

(She teleports away. Back on stage.)

Thunder: How did I know he was going to be trouble?

Mew Two: Well, he is evil.

(Mew appears in her chair.)

Mystic: Have you take care of everything?

Mew: Yep. Right, Knives?

(She holds Knives out to show everyone. He's crossing his arms and looks very angry.)

Thunder: What did you do to him?

Mew: I shrunk him down, put a wig and dress on him, and made him pretty!

Mew Two: Oh dear...

Mystic: Mew...

Mew: Okay! All of you back stage until I want you. (to Hamtaro and Bijou) And you guys can go to. I was done with you.

(Everyone walks off the stage.)

Thunder: It's my turn. I want to talk to Kenshin and Sanosuke.

Mew Two: Okay. Just a sec. Mystic!

(His sister appears next to him.)

Mystic: Yeah.

Mew Two: I have to leave for a moment. Kindly cover for me.

Mystic: Got 'cha. Who's on?

Mew Two: Kenshin and Sanosuke.

(He teleports away. Kenshin and Sanosuke walk onto the stage.)

Mew: Hi!

Thunder: Hey.

Kenshin and Sanosuke: Hello.

Mew: So you guys are from that Kenshin show?

Kenshin: That’s right.

Thunder: How do you like that?

Sanosuke: It’s fun.

Mew: Mr. Sanosuke, I think you need a nickname.

Thunder: What the hell are you talking about?

Mew: Sanosuke needs a nickname.

Kenshin: We call him Sano.

Mew: I like that! Can I call you Sano?

Sanosuke: If you want.

Mew: Cool! Okay! What do you like to do with your free time, Sano?

Sanosuke: Well, I like to knit. And sometimes I do those little latch hook things.

Thunder: Really? You should talk to Kem .She works at a craft store and can get you some good deals on yard and such.

Sanosuke: Maybe I will.

Mew: What about you, Kenshin?

Kenshin: Well, I’m studying to become a film director.

Thunder: Like Stephen Spielberg!? Cool!

Kenshin: Yeah. I was really excited to come here today because my class used the first Pikachu and Mew Show movie in class.

Mew: Really!? What for!?

Kenshin: Well, it was an example of good direction.

Thunder: Really?

Sanosuke: Who directed that?

Mew: Well, wanted a big name director like Spielberg to direct it, but he turned us down, so we did, along with Kem. She’s not too bad at the directing thing.

Kenshin: No she’s not. She did a great job. And the casting was excellent. Much better than in The Lightning and Meowth Show Movie.

Thunder: They have a movie!?

Kenshin: Oh yes. That was our example of bad direction.

Mew: So it was a terrible movie?

Kenshin: Yeah. It was limited release and it did very poorly in the box office.

Thunder: That’s what happens when you don’t advertise.

Mew: Like they have enough money to advertise.

Thunder: Yeah. No one watches their show at all.

Mystic: Should you really be gloating like that? That’s not a very nice thing to do.

Mew: They aren’t very nice either. They tried to steal our lives!

Mystic: *sigh*

Mew: Stop that!

Thunder: Oh well... Any way, what else is new with you guys?

Kenshin: Nothing here.

Sanosuke: Same.

Mew: Well, we’ll have to see you later, then. Bye now!

Thunder: Bye!

(Kenshin and Sanosuke say ‘bye’ and walk off the stage.)

Mew: (Adjusting Knives’ wig) They were nice.

Thunder: Yeah. Well, who’s turn is it to pick?

Mew: Mine! I want to talk to Kagome and Sesshomaru.

Mystic: Okay!

(Kagome and Sesshomaru walk onto the stage and sit down.)

Mew: Hey guys!

Kagome: Hello.

Sesshomaru: Hello, Mew! How are you?

Mew: I’m fine, thanks! How are you?

Sesshomaru: I’m fine, thank you!

Thunder: Mew, you made friends with another person that tried to kill us less than a month ago.

Mew: The second TPAMS movie was all acting and you know it.

Thunder: Yeah... But Sesshomaru is a very good actor.

Sesshomaru: You’re too kind!

Thunder: No. You really are.

Sesshomaru: Okay. I am.

Mew: Any way-

Kagome: You mean, the second TPAMS movie never happened?

Mew: No.

Kagome: I thought it was real! Like the first one!

Thunder: Actually, the first was only half true.

Mew: Kuja DID come back to kill us, but he never tried to publicly humiliate us by ruining our reputation.

Kagome: So you and Sesshomaru were never enemies?

Sesshomaru: Of course not! They’re friends of Kuja, so they must be nice people- errrr- Pokémon.

Kagome: Who is Kuja?

Sesshomaru: Kuja is that nice gentleman I was speaking to backstage.

Kagome: The guy in the skirt?

Sesshomaru: That’s right.

Mew: So, Kagome, you are Kikyo reincarnated?

Kagome: Yes.

Thunder: And that’s why you have all those special priestess powers?

Kagome: Yes.

Mew: And Sesshomaru. You are Inuyasha’s full demon brother?

Sesshomaru: Correct.

Thunder: Is that why you don’t like him?

Sesshomaru: Yeah. I don’t like humans, and he’s half human. So I don’t like him very much.

Mew: If you don’t like humans, why do you talk to Kagome?

Sesshomaru: I take that back. I don’t like MOST humans. I’m okay with Kagome. And my friend Rin. And that half human guy that Kuja had with him today is okay too.

Thunder: So there are some humans you like?

Sesshomaru: Yes. I also thing Kem is a very nice human. I love how she portrayed my character in that movie of yours. It was just splendid!

Thunder: Did you know that you act lust like Kuja?

Sesshomaru: Well, when you hang out with people for a long time, you sometimes start to act like them, and I’ve been hanging out with Kuja for years.

Mew: I could tell. Kuja picks the nicest friends!

Sesshomaru: He does.

Mew: Okay, so what do you do outside the show, Kagome?

(Kagome is staring back stage and doesn’t answer.)

Mew: Kagome?

Kagome: (pointing back stage) What is that?

(Thunder, Mew and Sesshomaru look to where Kagome is pointing. They see a large unicorn-bird-ampharos thing.)

Thunder: I think that’s Mystic.

Mystic: Are you blind, Thunder!? I’M Mystic!

Thunder: No! Mystic the talk show host.

Mew: Oh! I think she called herself a Crystalgleam. Whatever that is.

Thunder: Okay. Why don’t you come out here, Mystic.

(Mystic the Crystalgleam walks onto the stage. She sits down on the floor by Mew.)

*note: Mystic the Crystalgleam will be called “Mystic C” to avoid confusion with Mystic the Mew.

Mew: Hello.

Mystic C: Hello! It’s so great to finally be on your show!

Thunder: Well, we’re glad to have you! You had us on your show, so it’s only fair for us to invite you here.

Mystic C: Well, you guys are like my heroes! I hope that I can be as good as you are at the whole talk show hosting thing someday!

Mew: With a little practice and some good luck, you can be as good as us!

Thunder: (To Mew) What did you mean by good luck?

Mew: (to Thunder) That we both die in a fiery car crash so we aren’t here to crush her show in the ratings.

Thunder: You’re bad.

Mew: I know. (Turning to Sesshomaru and KAgome) Any way, have either of you seen Mystic’s show?

Sesshomaru: I can’t say that I have, but I don’t watch too much TV. Just TPAMS.

Kagome: Same here. I do watch American Idol sometimes, though.

Mew: Gross! You would admit that you watch that!?

Kagome: What? It’s not THAT bad.

Mew: Get! No American Idol watching people on my stage!

(Kagome walks off the stage.)

Mew: You are more than welcome to stay, though, Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru: Why, thank you.

Thunder: Do you want a new guest now?

Mew: Not yet. We have to talk to Mystic first.

Thunder: Okay. So, Mystic, how are you today?

Mystic C: I’m fine. How are you?

Mew: We’re great! Thanks for asking. So, your talk show is just a few episodes long, right?

Mystic C: Just 6 right now. How long is yours?

Thunder: Well, this is episode 48, plus 3 side stories, 6 special specials, and 2 movies... Or is it 7 special specials...

Mew: Lets just say it’s really long.

Mystic C: Wow... You guys have been around for quite awhile.

Mew: 3 years.

Mystic C: My goodness! I wonder if my show will be around that long.

Mystic: *muttering* Don’t bet on it.

Mew: Mystic Meowie!

Mystic: What? You say stuff like that to people all the time.

Mew: That doesn’t make it okay to say that now.

Mystic C: What did she say?

Thunder: Oh nothing... Nothing at all.

Sesshomaru: May I ask a question, Mew?

Mew: Of course!

Sesshomaru: Thank you. Mystic, you host a talk show, correct?

Mystic C: That’s right! It’s called “Mystic’s Talk Show.”

Sesshomaru: What kind of guests do you have on your show?

Mystic C: Well, who ever wants to come on. I’m not really that picky.

Mew: You can’t be in the beginning.

Thunder: Yeah. But once you make a name for yourself you can get selective.

(They hear a loud crash back stage.)

Mystic: Ummmmmmm...... Mew.... Thunder.....

Thunder: (Ignoring Mystic the Mew and the crash) What other stuff do you like to do, Mystic?

Mystic C: Well-

Mystic: Hey, Chupi! Mew! We have a problem!

Mew: What is it, Mystic!?

Mystic: A blonde haired guy with awful taste in clothes, a red haired guy with a nasty hair style, a blue lion, a really pale guy, some lady, and another lady who is in serious need of a new dress are in the guest room attacking Maester Seymour. Mew Two is trying to settle things down, but I don’t know how well he’s doing.

Mew: Oh no!

Thunder: We’ll be back, Mystic.

(Mew teleports away and Thunder runs back stage. In the gust room, Mew Two has Maester Seymour’s attackers sitting on some chairs trying to discuss the situation.)

Mew Two: So Maester Seymour is a little on the evil side. Is that any reason to attack him while he visits a talk show?

Wakka: But, Mew Two! He’s nothing but trouble, ya!

Mew Two: Wakka, we talked about the “ya.”

Wakka: I’m sorry, ya- *sigh*

Mew Two: Settle down.

Seymour: (Hiding behind Mew Two) Make them go away!

Mew Two: Hey! I’m working on it!

(Thunder runs in and Mew appears next to him.)

Mew: What is going on back here!?

Mew Two: Well, the “good guys” from Final Fantasy 10 decided that now was a good time to attack Seymour.

Auron: Please explain to me why it isn’t.

Mew: What did Seymour ever do to you!?

Lulu: Well, he tried to kill us on 4 separate occasions, he is always getting in our way when we try to get to Zanarkand-

Mew: Stop! Just stop it! He’s not bothering you now, so why won’t you just leave him alone!

Tidus: What fun would that be?

Mew Two: Tidus, fun is a terrible reason to attack Seymour.

Yuna: Mew Two?

Mew Two: Yes?

Yuna: We want to destroy Seymour so he can’t become Sin and destroy the planet.

Wakka: And he’s evil, ya! Argh! Why can’t I stop saying that, ya! Ahhhhhh!

Mew Two: Wakka! Settle down!

Wakka: Okay...

Mew Two: Now, Yuna, you know that Seymour is just acting and doesn’t really want to destroy anything, right?

Yuna: Really?

Tidus: He must be some actor, then.

Seymour: (coming out from behind Mew Two) Why, thank you!

Auron: I don’t buy it.

Mew Two: Why not?

Auron: He doesn’t strike me as someone we can trust.

Mew Two: I’m not asking you to trust him. I’m asking you to leave him alone.

Rikku: But what if he destroys the planet all because we leave him alone like you asked us to?

Mew Two: He’s not going to destroy anything.

Rikku: Okay.... (pulling out a pen and a notebook) Can I have your autograph!?

Mew Two: (taking them) Certainly.

Mew: Are you guys going to leave Seymour alone now?

Tidus: I suppose. But he had better stay out of trouble!

Seymour: Don’t worry! I’ll behave, I swear!

Tidus: Okay. Then! I guess we’ll be leaving.

Yuna: I’m sorry we bothered you.

Mew Two: Don’t worry about it. Have a nice day.

Thunder: Come back and let us interview you sometime!

Wakka: Of course we will, ya! Grrrrr....

Lulu: Come on, Wakka.

(They leave the studio. Thunder and Mew head back out onto the stage.)

Mew: Okay. That takes care of that.

Thunder: Okay. That took us a minute, so we’ll have to let you go, Mystic.

Mystic C: That’s okay. I understand.

Mew: Okay! Come visit again, sometime!

Mystic C: I will. Bye!

(She walks off the stage.)

Mew Two: Next?

Mew: Lets let Sesshomaru pick.

Sesshomaru: Okay. Who is left?

Thunder: Giovanni, Michelle, Kaiba, Davis, and Goku and Vegeta.

Sesshomaru: I don’t know... Who would you recommend?

Mew: Davis is usually pretty fun.

Thunder: Yeah.

Sesshomaru: Okay. Davis, then.

Mew Two: Davis it is.

(Davis walks onto the stage.)

Davis: Hey, guys!

Mew: Hi Davis. What’s up?

Davis: Nothing really.

Thunder: Nothing?

Davis: Yeah. I’ve just been hanging out.

Mew: With who?

Davis: Well, some times I hang out with Mokuba, Li, and Ken, but other days I hang out with T.K. and Andrea.

Thunder: What happened to Madison?

Davis: Ever since Mew made her be I friends with Sakura again, Madison has been spending more time with Sakura and Meilin.

Mew: That’s too bad.

Davis: No it isn’t! I can leave the house again!

Mew: Does she talk to you at all anymore?

Davis: She calls sometimes, but not nearly as much as she used to.

Thunder: Well, we’re glad you’re happy.

Sesshomaru: Who is Madison and why don’t you want to talk to her?

Mew: Madison is this girl that he made friends with after she got in a fight with her best friend. Then she became really clingy and obsessive and he stopped wanting to be friends with her.

Sesshomaru: I see. So you’re happy that she got her old friend back because she’ll leave you alone now.

Davis: That’s right.

Thunder: Any way, I’ve heard rumors that you’ve been hanging out with Andrea a lot lately.

Davis: More than I used too, I guess.

Mew: Why is that?

Davis: I dunno.

Mew: You don’t know?

Davis: Well, if she calls me wanting to know if anyone wants to hang out, I tell her ‘sure’ because I hang out with the others almost every day. She just kind of tags along.

Thunder: When did she start tagging along?

Davis: Well, when I was here a few weeks ago, Giovanni asked me if I would introduce her to some of the kids I hung out with. He said that he was worried because she didn’t have very many friends. So I told him that I would and she’s been coming with me when I go do stuff with the others ever since.

Mew: Giovanni asked you to bring her along?

Davis: Yeah.

Thunder: Wow. I can’t imagine Giovanni asking you to do him a favor like that. That’s so strange...

Davis: Yeah, but he did.

Mew: He must be getting soft in his old age.

Thunder: Yeah. There aren’t very many mean old people.

Mew: Yeah. So, anything else we should know about, Davis?

Davis: I don’t think so.

Mew: Okay. We’ll see you later, then. Bye!

Davis: Bye.

(He walks off the stage.)

Mew Two: Before you call your next guest, I think you should know that we only have 10 minutes left.

Mew: You’re kidding!

Mew Two: I’m not. We’ve had several interruptions today.

Thunder: That’s not enough time to interview anyone.

Mew Two: I’m sorry. How about you talk about tomorrow, then?

Mew: Okay. We’ll do that. You go let Giovanni, Michelle, Goku, and Vegeta know that they’re off the hook for today.

Mew Two: As you wish.

(He goes backstage)

Thunder: Okay. Lets talk about tomorrow. Ummmmm.... What are we doing tomorrow?

Mew: The special...

Thunder: Oh yeah! Tomorrow we are going to do something very different with the show. So it’s kinda like a special, but not exactly.

Mew: You see, Thunder and I are going to go out to dinner with a few different guests and we’re going to have nice, casual conversations with them.

Thunder: I get to eat with Goku and Vegeta’s families and Mew will be eating with Kuja’s family and Giovanni, his parents, and Andrea.

Mew: I’m very interested to see how well Giovanni and his family get along with Kuja and his parents.

Thunder: That could be trouble...

Mew: Hmmmmm.... That could be fun!

Thunder: You would say that...

Mew: Yep! So any way, tune in tomorrow to see some fun dinner conversations.

Thunder: Well, I think it’s time to end this.

Mew: Yep. Lets have Sesshomaru do it.

Sesshomaru: What do I do?

Thunder: Just say “That’s it for today’s episode of TPAMS. Tune in tomorrow for the Dinner with Guests Special.”

Sesshomaru: Okay then. *ahem* That’s it for today’s episode of TPAMS! Tune in tomorrow for the Dinner with Guests Special! Good night everyone!

Mew: Great job!

Thunder: Yeah!

Sesshomaru: Thanks.

Thunder and Mew: BYE!!!!!

That’s if for today’s episode of The Pikachu and Mew Show. Tune in tomorrow to see Thunder and Mew have dinner with some of their guests. I suppose that could be interesting... Just watch. Okay? Okay! Good night, everyone!