I FUCKING LOVE PORNSTARS!!!

Pornstars are fucking sweet. They'll let you put it in any hole you desire and they like facials. I can't wait until I have sex, I'm going to rule then.

Here, Aria Giovanni is donning my official T-shirt. I gave it to her for free, I wish she would've touched my wiener.

Crissy Moran is fucking hot. I would tear her shit up, if I only knew what tearing shit up entailed.

Krystal Steal stole this shirt from Gloatmiel's closet. He wears this shirt when he visits Fire Island.

Sky Lopez looks like J.Lo but she is not. I look like Gilbert Godfried and Woody Allen's love child.

It must be hot in herrre because Amber Michaels is taking her pants off. Someone should turn the thermostat up, maybe she would show me her verginer.