When I dream I see 
Shadows,

Shadows of a past I
Cannot forget, and a 
Future I cannot face.

You are with me again,
Looking at you I see
Myself in your smiling
Eyes.

I cannot tear myself
Away, I feel like a
Bug writhing on flypaper.

When you start to scream,
I cover my ears,
But the sound still rips
Through my head.

I hear the echoes when I
Wake, and I see the wisps
Of the fantasy before it
Dies.

There is so much blood...

I scrub and scrub but my 
Hands will not come clean,
Like Lady Macbeth, I cannot
Escape my fate.

It follows me as a shadow,
Or a rabid-foaming-faithful
Dog.

I close my eyes and the
Movie begins --

Night. Touch. Body. Shadows.
Eyes. Scream. Blood. Fear. Dance. Breathe.
Fear. Cry. Plead. Birth. Death.

Again...

The concrete mattress is
Cold against my back, and
The bars are long fingers.

Fingers that want to claw
My eyes from my head, and
Tear my heart from my
Body.

I feel empty now,
As if I never existed.

I killed to live, and
Now I want to read the
Last chapter.

As I rise from my slab,
I curl the bedsheets
Around my wrist.

It feels sensual against
My neck like a lover's
Feather-touch.

I hang the noose from the
Ceiling and look over my
Makeshift gallows.

I pull it tight around
My neck and squeeze my
Eyes shut --

I stand on the concrete bed,
And dive off...

I hear my neck crack and
My life winks out.

The dreams come...
  
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