The Squad 1999-2000

You'd be better off never knowing any of these people, but.....

For profiles of some of our famous names from the past, visit the Hall of Fame.

LOOKALIKES PAGE (NEW).

It was recently suggested to me to introduce transfer market valuations for each member of the playing squad. If you have any suggestions on the value of any of these players, please e-mail me at wvidywv@yahoo.com

NEW! Season 2000/1 Squad. To see a page slagging off this season's muppets, click here.

1. Gary Deans

Goalkeeper.

Reliable shot-stopper who recently took on the extra responsibility of being club secretary. Famously remembered for costing Visage a place in the Tony Pickett Cup Final last season with two horrendous blunders in the semi-final against Eureka, and for his constant whining.

1999-2000 : Pld 24

2. Gary Scott

Defender / Midfielder.

Versatile player who has played in every position for the team during his spell with the club, excluding goalkeeper. Was once known as a silky, skillful forward, but the years have taken their toll on him, and he is now known as a craggy stopper. Well known by the all referees, Gary holds the record for most bookings for the club.

1999-2000 : Pld 19(+7), Gls 5, Yel 3

3. Lee Allan

Left-back.

Skillful player who has also filled in many positions for the team. One of only four players who still remain with the club since its formation, Lee is apparently a fan of Playstation and of arguing with Lee Sutton. Lee was the only player to start every match for the club last season.

1999-2000 : Pld 28, Gls 1

15. Steve Elliott

Right-back.

El.

1999-2000 : Pld 8(+2)

13. Kenny Elliott

Defender.

Kenny.

1999-2000 : Pld 8(+2)

5. Kevin Deans

Centre-half.

His name is Kev, and he likes WWF.

1999-2000 : Pld 22(+3), Gls 1

4. Andrew Purvis

Centre-half.

The sort of sad b*stard who would sit all day making web-sites of his football team because he's got nothing else better to do.

1999-2000 : Pld 28, Gls 3

14. Gary Millen

Centre-half.

Cockney Gary.

1999-2000 : Pld 8(+4)

12. Lee Sutton

Midfielder.

Known by the players as the barrister as he spends so much time on the bench.

1999-2000 : Pld 14(+5), Gls 2

8. Mick Dematas

Midfielder.

I've been asked to not give too much information on this player in case the immigration officers track him down. I've also been told not to mention his own goal in the cup final which cost us the cup.

1999-2000 : Pld 25, Gls 10, Yel 1

7. Steve Carlin

Midfielder.

Left shoulder, left shoulder. Some of the players call him Bobby Darin, a joke that I don't really get.....

1999-2000 : Pld 16(+4), Gls 3, Yel 2

6. Gary Smith

Midfielder.

Another Gary.

1999-2000 : Pld 14(+9), Gls 8, Yel 1

11. Gavin McDonald

Winger.

Gav is rumoured to have stolen many pairs of the club's shorts for his kids, but these allegations are as yet, unproven.

1999-2000 : Pld 25(+2), Gls 6, Yel 3

16. Steve Posgate

Midfielder.

Not much is known about this player, other than that he works away alot. Introduced to the club by Gary Scott, Steve is known to everyone as "that bloke that Scotty brought once who looked like Steve Stone". Steve quickly won over most of the squad however with his displays in the matches against N & N, Carpets and the 2-1 win over Grey Hen, when he scored the winning goal.

1999-2000 : Pld 3, Gls 1

17. Lee Newman

Midfielder / Forward.

Recently rejoined the club after a spell with perrenial strugglers Low Simonside, where it is thought he enjoyed looking like a star in a crap team, Lee has missed many matches over the last 12 months due to back injuries and fishing commitments.

1999-2000 : Pld 2(+3), Gls 1

9. David Smith

Forward.

Len.

1999-2000 : Pld 26(+1), Gls 30

10. Graeme Strike

Midfield / Forward.

Record £2.5 million summer signing from the Satellite, Graeme started well for the team with two goals on his debut in the 2-0 win over Bentinck. Has played more in midfield recently.

1999-2000 : Pld 24, Gls 18, Yel 1

Alan Deans

Manager.

Recently retired to focus on guiding the club to domestic honours.

NEW SIGNING - a man with a huge cock.....to see a picture of the new signing, click here.

Other players to have represented the club this season:

Andrew Bowey, pld 3(+2)

Transferred to Homefair Blinds

Aaron Davison, pld 10(+1), gls 6

Recently returned from Homefair Blinds - profile to come

Peter Cummins, pld 1, gls 2

Retired

Iain McFee, pld (+1)

Unknown

Stats correct up to and including 9/4/00