Fun Things To Do In An Elevator

1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

2. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"

3. Sell Girl Scout cookies.

4. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake. 

8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

9. Do Tai Chi exercises.

10. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

11. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"

12. Give religious tracts to each passenger.

13. Meow occasionally.

14. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

15. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"

16. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

17. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.

18. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

19. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

20. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"

21. Leave a box between the doors.

22. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

23. Say "Ding!" at each floor.

24. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

25. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

26. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

27. Bring a chair along.

28. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

29. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

30. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

31. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."

32. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

- Author Unknown