RAGE

 This page contains lyrics to my life.
They come from the heart and mind.
Not all these lyrics are to be taken literally,
this is how I vent... this is how I live.
copyright 2001 ALX

--Ass Phantoms--

There are moments recollected within my mind
Moments when I was taking it from behind
Moments where butts were sticking in the air
Where others scaunt but I don't care
Bound by the memories of things gone wrong
Betrayed by the ones with the oversized dongs
My buddy rolled over, my dick growing bolder
I had a desire but there was a resistance.
It seem his dick in my ass is my only existence

Deep within my crevice I felt him reach his peak
His man juices in my ass making me feel so weak
Distorted mental images of never being straight
Being a homosexual pedophile is on my only true fate

--Ballad of a Dirty Mexican--

There's this awful stench, what could it be?
Is it Rico? Juan? Julio? Well maybe it's me
To remember where my family's at
Picking vegetables and carrying them in a dirty ball cap
Tengo que quedar leal con mi familia
Never let the bad times keep me down
Or let my red minivan turn brown
I'm tired of seeing all my brothers deported
Our people's lives being torn apart
Consumed by the flame of gringo rage
Being played as if I can't afford to bathe
Well, I can't
There's no running water in the house we're squatting.

I'm just sitting here thinking of that night,
Thinkin bout the border chase, and Papa loosing his life,
Everything happened so quickly,
I was afraid the only one to make it would be me,
Shit-stained pants and my dirty cap,
No shoes on, but I didn't give a crap,
I remember getting split up, and lost my way,
But I found my hombres the very next day.

There's a hole in my shirt where a stain used to be
I never thought having lice would bother me
I want to take a shower after work, but I'm always so rushed,
"I didn't wash up on shore like a dirty Rican,"
"I just want a shower," I started freakin' Cleanliness is not over-rated
Maybe one day I'll stop caring
I'm tired of smelling like shit, God, if it would only rain
I wish for a downpour like that of a hurricane
Sometimes I think, only God's tears could cleanse me
And show me life the way it oughta be
This smell is too much, I'm too dirty to fuck
Maybe someday I will be clean, and everyone will like me.

--Cock-ridden--

You didn't know that I only think with my cock, or how he likes to play
And when you get close, I'll sleep with some fat whore to help me get away
I'll lie and say everything will be fine
But in reality I'm still cheating and feeding you a line
When we're fucking she's always on top so I can see the ceiling
I lie to you because I'm too much of a pussy to tell you how I'm feeling
I watch the phone, hoping for another booty call
When your number showed up on the Caller ID, I ran down the hall.
But?

Where was I in your time of need? Running around looking for play.
I lied to myself, to help cope with the fact that you weren't okay
And you believed me, you stupid girl, you believed my lying
All because I wasn't man enough to see you crying.

--Useless Rubber Dong--

I know I just let go of the past
Like the time I broke your heart and left you on your ass
I guess that slut and I went too fast
Three days after sex, I developed a rash
I just couldn't stop thinking about her face
While I attempted to fuck you in an awful place
If you were smart you would have sprayed me with mace
Remembering how we went to the show
And how you left me at the doo'
You flirted with other boys, but what could I say
I had been fucking around the past 3 days

Useless rubber dong
Cause my STDs are contageous
Useless rubber dong
Because you were young and so defenseless (x2)

I don't why you wasted your time with me
or why I slept around like it was meant to be
I know I fucked you over but
My cock somtimes does the talking
Is that the reason you cried?
Could it be because I lied?
I remember when you looked me in the eyes
and told me it was over
Because I was too busy with another
In the field behind my trailer park home
I let my fingers roam
cause I knew you were the girl...
that I'd break.

Useless rubber dong
Cause my STDs are contageous
Useless rubber dong
Because you were young and so defenseless (x2)
Useless rubber dong...

--Untitled--

I feel like dick, something's not right, cum blurs my sight, so I can't see the light. I live my life in a hole, remember that one part in Joe Dirt? Imprisoned in a hole. Contemplating ass sex or suicide. I can't sleep, I'm a fucking loser. I whine too much, I act like I'm perfect, like I was there for you, and like I was faithful. I think I am full of rage, but it's actually constipation. It's coming out. I'm afraid I might go while Jordan's inside me. The power is intense, I'm ready to blow. I try to hold back, but the urge grows stronger, I don't know if I can keep from shitting during ass sex much longer.

--Somehow,Someday--

You're beautiful,
But do you know how much you hurt my heart?
I lose it all,
From mistakes I made that tore us both apart.
I know I can’t change the past,
Or how you feel,
But can I make it up to you?
Somehow, someday.

I’m learning now of how much pain I’ve caused before,
And if you don’t open your door,
I will understand.
I lost your trust and I’ve lost myself,
Can’t you see I need your help?
Do you understand?

Everything I see reminds me of the time we had together,
And how it’s all become a memory,
I think we both know that I can’t go on like this forever,
And maybe you like seeing me in pain,
But I can’t blame you.

Hurt me, and beat me, I’ll tear my own heart out,
To be with you again,
I know I can’t have you until you gain my trust,
At a time you were by best friend….
Now we’re no more.

--Ladida--

Seventeen, Goin’ no direction,
Not knowin’ where to go,
Seventeen, with no connection,
To the world that we all know.
It’s not enough to ease the tension,
It’s not enough to ease the pain,
It’s not enough to give you shelter,
In the cold and pouring rain,
But no matter how hard you try,
You’ll always be the same,
You’ll never become something,
And your problems still remain.

Ladida,
Cuz I have no direction,
Ladida,
Cuz I have no plans,
Ladida,
Cuz I don’t have the money,
Ladida,
Because I have no friends.

So now I sit in my bedroom,
Cuz I have no place to go.
And I sit and I think about you,
And I wonder cuz I don’t know.
The way you feel about me,
Or if I’ll ever be,
The one to show you love,
Or the things you want to see.
I write this song to you,
And I’d like to believe,
That someday we'll be together,
And you'll never have to leave.

Ladida,
I don’t care if I have no direction,
Ladida,
I don’t care if I have no plans,
Ladida,
I don’t care if I have no money,
Ladida,
As long as I have you in the end.