?You know, maybe we should look into getting you
involved in an anger
management program.?

Spike glared up at Xander.  ?I can manage my anger
just fine.?  He focused
his attention back on the fledge lying helpless
beneath him.  He slammed its
head down against the ground a few more times.

?We do have somewhere to be.?  Xander leaned back
against a tall headstone
with his arms crossed over his chest.

The reminder just made Spike growl and increase the
force of his attack.
When the fledge was unconscious and no longer begging
for release, Spike
staked it and stood up, brushing ash off his duster.

?Feel better??  Xander?s manner was joking, but the
concern in his eyes was
real.

Spike ignored the question.  ?I thought you were in a
hurry.?

Xander shook his head and started walking.  ?You don?t
sound like you feel
better.  Maybe you should try something else.  Maybe
you could join an
encounter group or something so you can talk about
your feelings with
someone.?

Spike raised his hand in an obscene gesture behind
Xander?s back.  Talk
about his feelings?  The only person he needed to talk
to about his feelings
was the person who was responsible for them.  The
person who made him feel
so protective that he turned into a bodyguard, the
person for whom he wished
he could bleed and hurt, the person who made him want
to go on existing even
though he was neutered by the chip.

The person who was taunting him with bleeding ?anger
management therapy? and
trying to distract him out of his bad mood.

He didn?t know how it happened, but then, he didn?t
expect to.  It didn?t do
any good to sit around and try to understand love, and
he knew better than
to try to fight it:  all he knew to do was accept it
and give in to it and
try to enjoy the ride as much as possible.  He knew
that he found Xander
attractive:  with his dark eyes and mobile mouth and
delicious scent of fear
and determination, he was hard to resist.  It was
getting to know Xander
that had doomed him, though.  Before, he could sit
back and laugh at the
other man?s clumsiness in a fight or anxious nattering
when with his
friends.  Now he?d seen Xander?s stubborn refusal to
ever give in or give
up, heard him laugh for true and not for show, watched
him half-kill himself
to protect his friends and include Spike in that
category.  It hadn?t taken
long for Spike to realize that he was in trouble, that
lust had deepened and
transformed into love while he wasn?t paying
attention.  Now he no longer
imagined just tumbling Xander down to the ground and
taking him; he wanted
to make Xander laugh and gasp and beg him for more, to
hold him before and
after and know that Xander was his.

Caught up in his thoughts, he was surprised by how
quickly they reached the
crypt they were seeking.  He reached out and caught
Xander?s arm.  ?There
are other ways we can do this.?

Xander shook his head.  ?No way is going to work
better than this.  I have
to do this.?

Spike released him reluctantly.  He hated this, but
one of the things that
drew him most to Xander was the dark-eyed man?s
refusal to stop just because
something was difficult.  He knew that he couldn?t
stop Xander from doing
it, so he would do his best to not make it any harder
than it had to be.
?I?ll be waiting, pet.?

Xander smiled at him and touched his shoulder
comfortingly.  ?It won?t take
long,? he said reassuringly before entering the crypt.

Spike growled and kicked over a headstone.  Xander was
trying to comfort
*him*.  Him, when Xander was the one the Cynon had
fixated on.  Spike hated
Cynons on general principles and hated this one even
more for hurting
Xander.  Unrelated to vampires, Cynons fed off the
emotional energy of their
victims; the darker and more painful the emotion, the
better the damn things
liked it.  He and Xander had encountered this one when
they had just started
to patrol in Buffy?s place.  Spike had wanted to kill
it for its interest in
Xander, but before he could, it had offered Xander a
compromise:  if Xander
would allow the Cynon to feed from him, the Cynon
would use its psychic
abilities to keep him informed about demonic activity
on the Hellmouth.

Xander, being Xander, said yes.

Spike moved closer to the crypt so he could see
through the door.  He hated
watching this but he didn?t want to leave Xander alone
with the Cynon.  He
compromised by watching from outside.  The minute the
bastard made one move
to go beyond its bargain, Spike would take its head
off.

The Cynon was circling Xander, skimming over the
ground in that smooth gait
peculiar to its species.  In appearance, it was closer
to human than most
demons, with skin of palest blue and small horns in a
darker shade ringing
the top of its head.  Its over-large eyes were fixed
on the dark-haired man
and its tongue skated over full lips.  ?What shall we
do today?? it mused in
a low voice.

?Something that won?t take too much time?? Xander
suggested.

Spike ground his fist into the stone of the crypt,
focusing on the pain as a
way to stop himself from walking in there and dragging
Xander out.  Xander
knew what was coming and dreaded it, but he still
found the will to mouth
off a bit.  It made Spike proud as hell, and made
watching that much more
difficult.

?I think...loneliness.  Yes.  I think that will do
nicely for tonight.?  The
Cynon reached out its hand so that it hovered bare
inches away from Xander?s
face.  ?Loneliness.?  It hummed quietly as it began to
summon forth that
emotion from Xander.

Fine tremors ran through Xander?s frame, growing
stronger as each second
passed.  Face twisted in lines of pain, he stubbornly
kept his eyes open,
refusing to look away from the demon.  As his shaking
grew worse, tears
began to stream down his face and still his eyes
remained open and his gaze
locked upon that of his tormentor.

Not even the pain was enough distraction for Spike
now.  He stopped grinding
his fist bloody and watched helplessly.  Cynons worked
by getting inside the
minds of their victims and summoning up emotions on
which to feed.  Right
now, Xander was reliving every moment of loneliness
he?d ever experienced
all at once, the pain of it magnified a thousendfold
for the demon?s
pleasure.  Spike knew loneliness, knew what a killing
sensation it was and
he hated that Xander had to go through this.  He?d
stand in for Xander if he
could, but the Cynon had no interest in him.  Only
Xander.

A noise distracted him from the interior of the crypt
and he turned quickly,
ready to take out his rage and frustration on whatever
was foolish enough to
sneak up behind him.  He froze when he saw who it was:
Riley and Graham.
?What the hell are you doing here??

?I could ask you the same thing,? Riley said.

?Where?s Xander?? demanded Graham.

Spike fought to keep himself from slipping into
gameface.  Did Graham think
Spike didn?t know?  Did Graham think Spike couldn?t
smell the attraction and
interest on him whenever he looked at Xander?  Spike
knew what was going on:
  Graham wanted *his* Xander.  ?Xander?s busy,? he
snarled.

Graham moved as though to look in the crypt and Spike
instantly countered
him, blocking his view.  What was going on inside was
none of their
business.  He knew that Xander didn?t want people to
be looking in on him
and watching him while he suffered.  Even more, he
knew that Xander didn?t
want the Initiative to find out about the Cynon.  Not
only was he nervous
about what they could do to him, but he feared that
they would take some
action against the demon and destroy his valuable
source of information.
Spike might not be able to take Xander?s place before
the Cynon, but he
could help make sure that nothing else happened to
upset him.  The soldier
boys were staying outside the crypt.

And Graham especially was staying away from *his*
Xander.

?He doesn?t want your help in this,? Spike said,
standing firm.  ?He doesn?t
need it.  It?s none of your business.?

Graham shook his head.  ?Whatever you?re hiding, it
ends now.  Move or be
moved.  I?m checking on Xander.?

Spike stepped forward, getting into the soldier?s
face.  ?No.  It?s not your
concern.?  When Graham moved to side step him, Spike
grabbed his arm.  He
knew it was foolish, knew that he couldn?t do anything
to stop Graham, not
with the chip in his head.  He still had to try, had
to protect Xander in
any way that he could.

Graham countered by grabbing Spike?s arm and trying to
throw him off.  Spike
refused to be moved.  Ignoring the first warning
twinges from the chip, he
shoved Graham backwards.  He shook his head to clear
it and set himself
stubbornly in front of the blue-eyed man.  ?No.?  He
watched Graham clench
his jaw and prepared himself for a fight.  It was
going to hurt, but he was
going to buy Xander as much time as possible.

?Spike??

The shaky voice behind him drew his attention away
from the confrontation.
He turned and watched Xander exit the crypt, face pale
and drawn in lines of
pain.

*****