********************************

Graham knew he was in trouble. Deep, deep trouble. If
that many years
spent in the Marines had taught him anything it was to
know when
there was no way out, when there was no way back.

For the first time that he could remember that thought
didn't fill
him with dread and worry. It made him feel nice and
kinda warm inside
and not for the first time recently, Graham worried
about what had
happened to him. //When did I get this mushy?//

Of course he knew the answer to that. The answer came
in the form of
a hot guy with slightly overly long, floppy brown
hair, liquid
mahogany eyes, and a smile that made Graham hard
almost instantly. A
guy that at this moment Graham hadn't seen for 16
hours, 24 minutes
and 13, 14 seconds, not that he was counting of
course. And this was
the problem. Graham knew he was a mess because Xander
was all he
could think about. The last thought on his mind when
he fell asleep,
and the first thought when he woke. Well, if Graham
was going to be
honest with himself, most of the time in between those
two points was
also filled with thoughts of Xander as well, pretty
good thoughts
actually.

That was the problem, Graham thought that because he
hadn't seen
Xander for so long, the moment he did he'd lose all
control, just
jump him and show him how much he cared. Not really a
problem in
itself, Graham thought with a smile on his face, more
a problem
considering where they were going to be meeting.

`So like I was saying,' Riley continued, `it would be
great if you
could come along, just offer a little support, nothing
strenuous. I
wouldn't normally ask it's just he's gonna be there
and I want
someone there I can trust.'

"He", of course was Angel and "He" wasn't really
Riley's favourite
person, or non-person, or whatever the hell civilians
called
vampires. So Graham could understand why his friend
needed the
support.

Also Graham was a little interested in meeting the
guy. He'd featured
in quite a few of Xander's stories and Graham was
interested to put a
name to a face. Thinking about this of course didn't
help. Graham
heard most of Xander's stories about life in
Sunnydale, while the two
were curled up, bodies entwined, in his lover's bed.
//So, so not
helping with keeping me calm.//

`Sure Ri. Glad to help, just let me sort a few things
out. Should be
ready to leave in about 15. You driving?'

Riley just smiled and nodded, clapped his hand on his
friend's
shoulders and left him alone in his room.

Graham thought that if he was going to turn up at a
Scooby meeting he
really should give Xander a heads up. Reaching for the
phone, he
tried to convince himself he wasn't also hoping that
Xander might try
and find a way to also be at Giles'. Just
coincidentally of course.

`Hey baby.' Graham's spirits had lifted as soon as his
lover
answered.

`Uh hello? Sorry you'll have to be more specific. I'm
a very busy
man, sometimes I don't even get names, who is this?'
Graham could
hear his lover smiling as he spoke.

`Xan! Don't tease like that. You know if there's other
guys I wanna
meet them too.' Graham decided two could play at this
game.

`Ouch, so I'm not enough for you Soldier Boy ???'

`Hey no fair, you started.' Something about his lover
always brought
out the worst in the ex-marine. And the best.

`Fair enough. So what's up? You wanna come over and
get me all
dirty?' Graham could tell Xander was smiling again.

`Fuck yeah, but ?' voice trailing off, Graham sighed.
`Riley wants me
to go with him to this Scooby meeting, and I just
wanted to tell you
in case, you know, you were gonna be there?'

`Well I was gonna just blow it off? But now I'm
thinking something
quite different, same phrase, just ? different.'

`Jeez you're a Ho, Xan!' Both men began to laugh.

`Why are you so happy?' Graham asked in between fits
of laughter.

`Well my boyfriend finally called me, thank you very
much, oh and
Willow and I talked, and it all went well. Except for
the fact that
she was running a little late, and I was kinda nervous
to begin with,
and she didn't turn up for awhile, and so I had
another coffee and
three later she finally arrived and now I've got this
really wicked
caffeine rush and I think it's best I stop now ?'

Graham could only smile, he was well versed in Xander
speak. `I'm
pleased your talk went well, so you gonna be at Giles'
tonight then?'
He hoped he didn't sound too needy.

`Of course.'

`Well I better go. I'll see you there then.' Graham
was definitely
smiling as he hung up the phone. He quickly grabbed
his jacket and
moved out of his room.

**********************************************

Graham didn't really think of Riley as a vain person,
but after
tonight's performance he was prepared to change his
opinion. After
convincing his friend that no, he couldn't wear his
fatigues to
Giles', and that it didn't really matter what he wore
and how
intimidating he looked, Graham decided that yeah,
Riley was still
maybe, just maybe a little jealous of Angel.

`C'mon Ri, we're never gonna get there. It's gonna be
okay.' Graham
wasn't used to his friend and ex-CO acting like this.

`You sure?'

Graham just nodded and made sure that Riley didn't try
and change
again. `Jeez dude you're acting like this is your
first date or
something.' Probably not the best thing he decided.
Riley's stare
would have made even a Polar Bear wish for warmer
climates.

Graham just held up his hands in supplication and
decided that Xander
was a bad influence, maybe it was better just being
quiet supportive
guy.

After only about another ten minutes, and one more
change of clothes,
Riley was ready. Graham was now getting restless and
couldn't wait to
get to the meeting.

The two men drove silently to Giles' house, Graham
wanted to tell
Riley he was there for support but decided that maybe
it was best not
to speak. He knew Riley knew that anyway.

Graham didn't really know Giles, mostly he knew how
the others felt
about him. They all seemed to respect and defer to
him, and although
he was no longer Buffy's watcher, Graham knew to defer
to
responsibility, years of military training had taught
him that. Riley
also seemed to respect him, and that sort of
recommendation meant a
lot to Graham.

Followed his friend to the door to Giles' apartment
and waited while
he knocked. Graham was beginning to worry that he
might not be able
to keep his promise to Xander, and would instead jump
him as soon as
they were together.

He was rather pleased when the man in question
answered the
door. `Hey Riley,' reaching out and shaking his hand.
`Oh and you
brought me a present.' The last part said quietly
after Riley had
already entered the room. Graham was pretty sure his
friend hadn't
heard, but blushed nonetheless.

Graham was pleased his lover didn't offer to shake his
hand, he knew
even that small amount of contact might be too much.

`And Graham, come in.' This time the dark-haired man
spoke a little
louder, still holding the door open and gesturing
inside with his
hand. Graham moved past him to enter, could feel
Xander brush against
him, contact sending shivers through his body,
heartbeat racing.
Xander just smiled in return, knowing that if anyone
else had seen,
it would have looked like an accident.

Graham was definitely worried about keeping his
control. Xander
didn't seem to be helping either.

He moved slowly into the room, following behind Riley,
Marine
training to the fore, surveying the area. Riley had
moved to Buffy's
side, staking his claim, they kissed and he
immediately grabbed for
her hand. Graham could see his friend clearly position
himself
between his girlfriend and her ex. Well, the man who
Graham assumed
was her ex.

The first thing the ex-marine thought, was that he
definitely suited
the name. Standing next to Giles, long dark coat,
pants and shirt in
similar tones. //Jeez the guy's big// Graham couldn't
help but be
impressed. Graham had always been partial to the whole
tall dark and
handsome thing, that's what had first attracted him to
Xander.
Something about this guy was pretty special. Dark
eyes, dark hair.
Graham decided it was probably the incredibly pale
skin that made the
contrast so noticeable. //Definitely one to watch out
for Ri, bet he
sees his fair share of action.//

The two talking, Giles looking up listening intently.
As soon as the
two other men entered the room, Angel's focus changed.
First on
Riley, but soon after, Graham could feel those dark
piercing eyes on
himself. The focus causing blood to rush to his face
as he blushed.

Sitting together on the couch were Willow and Xander.
Willow waved a
greeting to Graham, enormous grin on her face.
Xander's expression on
the other hand had changed. His eyes dark, brow
furrowed. Graham was
unsure what had caused the change and guessed that his
lover was
attempting to not just blurt out their secret.

Graham allowed his eyes to travel back to the dark man
on the other
side of the room.

`Pretty special, huh?' Graham couldn't help but jump
at the voice
that seemed to materialise behind him, voice quiet,
close to his ear,
Graham didn't know if anyone else had heard.

`Spike!' Graham heard Giles raise his voice.

Graham had been surprised that the other man had been
able to sneak
up on him, surprised until he realised who it was.
Hostile 17. Riley
had said his name was Spike.

Graham stood his ground, only inches from his face,
shock of white
blonde hair, deep blue eyes. Graham could feel those
eyes staring
deep into him.

`Spike!' A new voice deep and gravely. Graham
recognised the voice of
authority and immediately the blonde Vampire moved
back. As little as
had been said, Graham recognised a command when he
heard one. Angel.

`Well, aren't you gonna introduce us?' Sharp English
accent, arrogant
swagger. Blue eyes never leaving Graham's face.

`Yeah sorry.' Riley this time. `Everybody this is
Graham, Graham I
think you know everyone except Spike, whom you've
met,' all the offer
Spike needed. He reached out, hand extended. Graham
could feel the
cold flesh pressed against his, strong grip, slight
squeeze. Graham
was unsure if he had imagined it or if Spike had
actually trailed his
fingers against his open palm as he let go. Looking
into those eyes
Graham was pretty sure he hadn't imagined it.

`And this is Angel.' Even though he tried, Graham
could recognise the
resentment in his friend's voice.

Graham turned, and crossed the room. Up close he was
even more
impressive. The ex-marine hoped the others couldn't
see his
blush. `Nice to meet you Graham.' Shaking hands again.

Angel's hand was cold, just like Spike's. Something
about him seemed
different though. This Vampire didn't make him feel
simply like a
meal. Graham definitely knew Riley was in trouble now.
Graham let go
of Angel's hand and moved back to where he'd been
standing. He
decided not to give the blonde Vampire the pleasure of
making him
stand somewhere else.

Giles and Angel had begun to talk quietly again.
Graham could still
feel those dark eyes on him. The ex-marine looked back
to the couch,
Willow was now alone. Xander nowhere to be seen. Noise
attracted his
attention to the kitchen where he could see his lover,
seemingly
occupied, slight scowl on his face.

Graham felt uncomfortable. Unsure how to act, he could
tell from
Xander's behaviour that he felt more comfortable
keeping his
distance. Graham felt that was for the best, and
decided to go along
with it.

Willow indicated the spot next to her and he sat down,
immediately
engulfed in the conversation she had begun.

`Graham?' Riley's voice now. `Giles says Buffy was
waiting for me to
arrive before they started. The four of us ?' He
indicated himself,
his girlfriend, Giles and Angel. `?are going to talk
privately. I'll
just leave you guys to it.' Graham nodded in response.

`Don't worry Pet,' the blonde Vampire was back again,
lecherous look
on his face, `I'll take good care of him.'

Riley stiffened and began to move to stand between his
friend and the
Vampire. Graham just shook his head and Riley stood
back, moving once
again to Buffy. The four of them began to file out of
the room.
Graham could see Angel staring hard at Spike.

`Don't worry, secret Scooby stuff, when it's hardcore
they don't even
tell us about it, I'm surprised Buffy wanted Riley
here, but I guess
she wants the support.' Willow leapt back into their
conversation,
distracting Graham again. Although the ex-marine
decided he'd be best
to keep an eye on Hostile 17.

Graham could see Spike had devoted his attention to
Xander, the two
now in the kitchen. Graham could see his lover
drinking from a glass
doing his best to ignore the blonde Vampire beside
him. He could see
by the look on his lover's face that he wasn't
enjoying himself.

`Oh don't worry about Spike, he's all bark no bite now
and when
Angel's around he's on his best behaviour.' Willow
seemed to be the
only one unfazed by this meeting.

She did however help Graham to calm down a little, his
nerves on
overload at the moment. `So what's Angel's deal? Riley
mentioned him
a bit, I can see why he feels intimidated by him.'
Willow smiled and
began to talk to the ex marine about Angel.

Graham sat next to Willow and continued to listen. He
noticed Xander
and Hostile 17 come back into the living room. Xander
looked just as
frazzled as Graham felt, he tried to offer a smile in
support. Didn't
seem to help. Attention attracted to what the blonde
was saying. The
two men sat down opposite Willow and Graham.

`So Pet, haven't seen you around much lately...'
Graham could feel
the blonde watching him as he spoke to Xander. `Been
busy have you?'
laughter evident in the man's voice.

`Fuck off Spike.' Graham could almost feel the tension
in the room,
even Willow was no longer speaking. The look on
Xander's face summing
up his reaction to the questioning.

Spike didn't stop, he seemed to be enjoying himself
now. `Interesting
isn't it? I wonder why that is? Would have thought
after demon girl
left you'd have nothing better to do. Or should I say
no-one ?' Voice
fading off into almost silent laughter.

Graham wasn't sure why his lover was putting up with
this if what
Riley said was true. He watched Xander stand and move
quickly out of
the room. Graham was just about to stand and beat the
shit out of the
blonde smart ass sitting in front of him, laughing
cocky statement
plastered on his face. Could feel Willow's hand on his
shoulder. Saw
her rolling her eyes, telling him not to bother
without saying the
words. He just nodded back in response.

She followed her friend out of the room.

`Alone at last.' Spike sounded pleased with their
predicament.

`Don't try that shit on me Hostile 17. I'm not like
them, I won't
think twice about kicking your skinny British ass.'

Graham's hostility seemed only to fuel the Vampire
before him. Spike
laughing uproariously.

`Like the fire Pet. Bet he does too.' Wicked gleam in
his eye. `You
see I know. I can tell these things, and all I can
smell on the whelp
is you. Well you and a healthy dose of fear, so I'm
guessing the
others don't know. I know Red does but the others ?
Hmmm?'

Graham tried hard to control his rage, knowing the
other man could
sense it as he's holding his hands up before him.

`No need to worry Pet ?' Graham watches the man turn,
can see past
him. Xander and Willow back in the doorway. The
witch's hand on
Xander's arm, moving reassuringly.

`Leave him the fuck alone.' Graham knows Xander's
pissed, but he's
worried if he says or does anything he'll just make it
worse.

The blonde is back on the defensive again. `No need to
worry mate,
just clearing it up with your man here. Secret's safe
with me.'
Graham's now worried that Xander's going to get into a
fight as he
sees his lovers reaction to the blonde Vampire winking
at him,
grinning madly.

Graham moved to stand between the two men as Xander
moved back into
the room fists clenched. `Xan...' Concern in his
voice. `The freak's
not worth it, just leave it.'

`Oh I do love a big strong man.' Can hear Spike's
voice from behind
him. Xander reacts badly, moving forward, trying to
get past Graham
to the laughing Vampire. Graham resting his hands on
Xander's
shoulders restraining him gently. Trying to get the
dark-haired man
to look at him, but he seems mightily pissed.

Can feel Spike close behind him, Xander looking over
his shoulder.
Graham unsure what the blonde is doing. Hears him
inhale, face close
to the side of Graham's almost touching. `Oh, and it's
not just you
he's hot for Pet.' Hears him laugh. Graham now having
to use his
strength to restrain his lover. Lets the man twist
away from him when
he gives up trying to get to the Vampire.

Can hear Willow from her position in the doorway. `I'm
going to get
Angel ? and Buffy.' She turns to move, Spike's voice
stopping her.

`No, wait?.'

`Scared are you blondie?' Xander seems more calm but
Graham can tell
he's still pissed.

`Look, let's just keep this between us. I've said I'll
keep my trap
shut, I just, find it interesting that's all.' Spike's
smiling again,
moves around Graham, hand out for Xander to shake.
Raises his
eyebrow. `Truce?'

Xander reluctantly shakes, seemingly more calm now.

`That's better mate.' Grins lecherously at Graham,
`Mind you if
either of you do ever wanna talk you know where to
find me?'

Spike quickly moved back to avoid Xander. Laughing at
the same time.

`God get over yourself Spike. What makes you think
anyone's
interested in you anyway. You've been dead for over a
hundred years
and the whole cold thing ewww. Don't flatter yourself,
Eskimo man.'

Graham's pleased to see the old Xander is back. Spike
actually looks
a little upset.

`Hope you like them feisty mate.' Graham can feel
Spike's hand slap
him on the back as the blonde moves across the room.
Spike still
chuckling to himself.

`Shut the fuck up Spike!' Xander, voice raised from
the other side of
the room.

`If I don't will you punish me?' Vampire, laughing
harder to himself,
winks at Graham and moves quickly away. `What say the
four of us raid
ol' Ripper's booze cabinet while the grown ups are off
talking. Wanna
whiskey Pet?'

Graham shook his head in response, turning to see if
Xander was okay.

The dark-haired man had moved back to stand by Willow.
Graham wished
he could reassure his lover but was worried the others
might return.

The soft clink of bottles drew his attention back to
the blonde
Vampire, who now had his head deep in the cupboard,
muttering to
himself.

*******************************************

Graham's attention became distracted as Buffy burst
back into the
room. She didn't look happy, it was easy to see she
was fighting back
tears. She moved quickly towards the door, Riley
trailing behind her.
Before any of them had noticed, she had left.

Riley seemed unsure what to do. Graham could see his
indecision. `Go
after her man, I'll be fine.'

Riley nodded then followed his girlfriend out the
front door.

Spike couldn't resist. `Always fun when me old sire's
in town.' He
softly chuckled to himself.

Both Giles and Angel appeared in the door. Angel had
taken off his
coat somewhere in the other room and a worried
statement was on his
face. Giles stood behind him, gently cleaning his
glasses with the
hem of his shirt.

`Sorry Rupert.' Graham could see Angel was concerned.
The other man
shook his head as he placed his glasses back on.

`Yes, well. Not really your fault I'm sure. I think
it's probably
best we get onto things nonetheless. Angel nodded in
response. `Willow if you wouldn't mind, I was hoping I
could get your
help with a few things.'

Willow seemed more than happy to help as she followed
the older man
out of the room again. Leaving Graham and Xander alone
with the two
Vampires.

Graham was worried after Spike's performance that he
would say
something to Angel, but he didn't seem interested
anymore. Xander
remained quiet, not looking at Graham, whilst the
blonde focused his
attentions on Angel.

`So mate, the ol' slayer not as tough as she used to
be huh?'

`Spike...' Deep voice signalling the dark Vampire's
annoyance.

`Cries at the drop of a hat these days ?' Spike
threatening to
continue. Graham was pleased the other man interrupted
him.

`Spike, get in here.' Angel, voiced raised, doesn't
even bother to
check if the blonde Vampire's even following him into
the kitchen.

Spike stands and follows, muttering to himself.
`Bloody ordering me
around ?'

Graham can't help but smile, eyes following the two as
they exit to
the kitchen. Turns back to look at Xander, smile slips
off his face
as he sees the dark-haired man staring at him. Face
serious. No
humour in his eyes at all.

`You okay babe?' Graham begins, shocked when Xander
interrupts him.

`Shut up!.' Other man keeping his voice low. `Don't
you think it's
bad enough he knows, you want everyone else to hear?'

Graham at first taken aback, feels hurt at the way
Xander is speaking
to him. `What? What do you care what he knows, he's
just a Vampire!'

`Oh just a Vampire is he? Yeah right Graham.' The
ex-marine can hear
the way Xander says his name, wants to reach out and
touch him, show
him it'll be okay. Thinks that won't be a good idea.

`I'm ? I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking, it's just ?'
Interrupted again.

`Yeah, not thinking ?' Both men now distracted by the
argument from
the kitchen. They can see Spike rolling his eyes,
Angel is obviously
chastising the smaller blonde Vampire. Spike throws
his arms in the
air and storms past Angel towards the door.

`Think I'll let myself out.' Doesn't wait for an
answer and he's out
the door.

Graham looks back to Angel, sees the Vampire watching
him, can tell
he feels as exasperated as he looks.

`Maybe that's a good idea.' Graham can hear Xander
muttering to
himself. Graham feels confused, can't tell when he
slipped into the
Twilight Zone and feels bad he can't show Xander
everything is fine.
Wants to touch him, but from the look in his lover's
eyes is unsure
what he should do.

About to speak to him when he sees Giles pop his head
in the room
from round the corner. `Xander? Can you come and help
us? Willow and
I need some supplies picked up from the Magic Shop and
we were hoping
you could help.' Not really a question. The older man
is gone before
he waits for Xander to respond.

Graham sees Xander watching him as he speaks. `At
least good for
something I suppose.' Wants to answer but sees him
leave the room.
Graham itching to follow him, hold him till he makes
him feel better.

Instead stands in the room, mouth open like a fish,
feeling useless.

`He'll be okay.' Surprised once again. Turns to see
Angel standing
right behind him. Hadn't heard him approach. Just
opens his mouth
again still not speaking. Angel smiles at him.

`I think I owe you an apology.' Angel signals for
Graham to sit,
waits for him to do so then sits himself. `I know you
don't think the
best of me, I know how Riley feels,' slight pause.
`And Xander.'
Raises his eyes to meet Graham's

`Fuck, does everybody know? Did blondie tell you?'

Sees Angel smile again, joins in as he shakes his
head. `No Spike
didn't tell me. You're probably not aware but we have
certain
advantages when it comes to that sort of thing.
Heightened olfactory
senses, and in Spike's case the intuition of a slut.'
Graham smiled
at the other man's joke.

`Now I know Xander and I haven't always been the best
of friends, but
he's a good kid. And even though he'd hate to hear it
I do care for
him. I do care whether or not he's happy. I also feel
responsible for
what's happened here tonight, I should never have left
Spike alone. I
of all people know what he can be like. Genuine
concern from the
older man, he reached over, hand on Graham's shoulder
signalling his
support.

`I think it's best I go now.'

Graham stood up, the two men now facing each other.

`Give Xander my apologies as well.' Graham was
confused but nodded in
response. The contrast between the two Vampires made
his mind reel.
Graham wasn't sure which was more odd, the callous
disregard of Spike
or the almost nurturing attitude Angel held towards
his lover.

`It's not your fault Angel.' Graham knew the Vampire
didn't believe
him but was reassured when he held his hand out and he
shook it.
Graham turned to watch the Vampire leave.

`Hmmm, cosy.' Xander's voice from the doorway shocked
Graham back to
reality. Graham knew he had been staring but was
unaware his lover
was also in the room, unsure how long he'd been there.

`I'm leaving now as well.' Xander crossed the room not
even waiting
for an answer.

Graham began to follow. `Xan, listen we need to talk.'
Graham had to
walk quickly to try and catch up, only reaching him
when he was
almost at his car. Angel now no longer to be seen.

Xander seemed to be ignoring him. `Xan? Wait please?'
Graham reached
out wrapping his hands around the top of Xander's arm.

Xander froze then spun towards Graham, eyes locked to
where he still
held him. `Get your fucking hands off me!' Graham was
shocked, he'd
known Xander was mad but couldn't work out why Spike
had effected him
so much.

`Xander? Don't worry about him. He's a worthless piece
of shit
anyway. Please will you just listen?' Graham removed
his hand, still
shocked by the way Xander was looking at it.

`I'm leaving. When you're not so distracted you should
maybe get in
touch' The dark-haired man opened the door to his car.
`If that's
what you still want.'

Confusion clear on Graham's face as his lover drove
off.

*****************************************

Graham still stood at the side of the road, even after
his lover's
car had disappeared from view. Unsure what had made
his lover react
so badly, he felt drained. Like he'd taken a beating
and then been
made to run 20 miles after it.

Graham knew it wasn't wise to stand alone at night in
Sunnydale, but
that was the last thing on his mind.

`He'll come round Pet, don't worry.' Graham spun round
quickly, could
see Spike walking towards him, surrounded by a halo of
cigarette
smoke.

`Get the fuck away from me, don't you think you've
done enough?'
Graham had to clench his fists to restrain himself
from pummelling
the blonde Vampire before him.

Spike held his hands up before him. `Hey, alright I
must admit I got
a bit carried away, but the thought of you two. You
can't blame a man
huh?' Spike quickly continued as Graham's face
darkened
further. `Look, don't tell the whelp I said this, but
I owe him one
okay, so I'm going to help out here.'

Graham was unsure why he bothered to stay and listen,
but sensed that
maybe the Vampire was in his own twisted way trying to
be helpful.

`Here, I'll walk you home, we'll talk, by the end of
it we'll be best
mates and next you'll be asking me to hold the camera
for the two of
you okay?' Full smile back on the Vampire's face.

Graham didn't want to admit he needed walking home but
he thought at
the least the blonde Vampire would act as fodder and
allow the ex
marine the chance to escape if they ran into trouble.
He nodded and
let Spike lead him away, giving him directions as they
walked.

`You see the whelp's jealous, seeing you `n' Angel
talking ?' Spike
began.

tbc