********************************

Graham was worried.

He could understand if Xander needed time, knew that
more than likely
his confrontation with Buffy probably hadn't gone that
well. He'd
seen her after she'd left, Riley had said she'd been
okay, but Graham
really wasn't too convinced.

Graham just wanted to make sure that his lover knew
that if he needed
him, that he would be there for him. He'd left him a
message earlier.
Had tried to call him at home but there was no answer.
Told him that
if he wanted to be alone just to give him a call back
and that would
be alright. He then used up most of the rest of
Xander's machine
telling him how sorry he was, how he hadn't meant to
say anything to
Buffy, but he'd been unable to stop.

Once he'd started, there was no way he couldn't tell
her what he
thought.

So he'd told him that instead of meeting for lunch
Graham would take
some time off and come back to his apartment to talk
to him, make
sure he was okay. He told him he hoped that he wasn't
answering
because everything had gone well with Buffy and that
if he didn't
want him to come over that was okay too, just to call
him back.

Still no answer, no call back. So Graham had decided
to go see him
anyway. Was a bit worried, hoped Xander wasn't mad at
him. Stopped on
the way there. Bought him some Oreos. Running his
apology over and
over in his head.

Unlocked the door to the apartment. Knocked just in
case on the open
door.

`Xan it's me.' Silence.

Graham moved inside, still no sign of him. Decided he
must have gone
out, not sure if that was good or not. //Surely if
everything had
gone okay with Buffy he would have phoned?//

Graham sighed to himself, decided he'd leave him a
note and the
Oreos.

That's when he noticed.

Xander was by no means a fanatic when it came to
cleanliness,
although Graham had caught his lover cleaning up the
other night
before he'd arrived. Had walked in on him moving the
furniture
slightly, stacking the magazines on the table in a
neat pile, tidying
up. He'd pretended not to notice. The current state of
the room
wasn't like Xander.

The coffee table in the middle of the room looked like
it had been
pushed aside. Track marks buried deep in the carpet.
Magazines,
cushions scattered. A glass, broken against the edge,
shattered
jewels collecting the light, liquid pooling from where
it had fallen.

`Xander?'

Graham's instincts kicking into overdrive, he quickly
searched to see
if his lover was still there. He darted into each
room, no sign.
Graham knew something was wrong, could sense it, knew
something had
happened and his lover was in danger.

Searched for the phone. Found it still on it's cradle,
but knocked
aside, cord unwound chaotically. Next to it Xander's
keys and wallet.
Untouched from where he always left them. Where he
cast them aside
without thought, each night when he came through the
door. Habit
dictating where they sat.

Now Graham was certain, he would never have left
without them.

Reached for the phone, realised he didn't know the
number he wanted
to call. Could feel the panic rushing through him. His
hands began to
shake, still holding the undialled phone. Had to force
himself to
concentrate. Hated the despair that he could feel
rising inside him,
beginning to form in the pit of his stomach.

Graham attempted to reach a semblance of calm. Began
to try to
breathe more regularly.

Knew Xander kept a list of numbers somewhere, couldn't
remember
where. Graham began to frantically search. In only
moments, although
it seemed like hours, Graham began to thumb through
Xander's phone
book. Found the number he wanted, with shaking fingers
he punched the
number.

`Hello ? hello?'

`Willow, it's me, Graham ? is ?' Had to try hard to
continue. `Is he
there with you?'

`Graham? What's wrong are you okay? Who? Xander? No
he's not, oh God,
Graham what's wrong?' He knew that he was scaring her,
knew she could
tell from his voice that he was on the edge of panic.

`He's not here. I think he and Buffy had an argument,
I came to see
him and he's not here. I think, Oh God Willow, I think
there's been a
fight. He's gone but his keys, they're...they're still
here.'

He was now blurting the words out to her, trying to
make them
understandable, hoped he succeeded.

`Buffy? Argument about what? Oh God, she wouldn't
though, not Buffy.
She wouldn't do anything to him.'

`You didn't see her this morning Willow, she seemed
pretty mad.'

`Buffy would never...are you still at Xander's?' The
witches voice
now more firm.

`Yeah, just turned up. I'm just, I'm scared that maybe
something else
has then, it looks like a fight ?' couldn't continue
his voice
fading, trying hard not to hyperventilate.

`I'll be right over.'

Reassured by her voice, heard her hang up. Could hear
the dial tone
on his ear. For the first time Graham felt helpless,
unable to do
anything. He felt mad that he felt like that. Hoped
that Xander was
fine.

Quickly dialled, hoping Riley would be in. Pretty sure
he remembered
him say he'd be home most of the day, in between
classes. Can't
remember if that was yesterday he said that, or this
morning. Graham
was worried he may have to hang up. He felt like he
needed to throw
up. Mouth dry, acidic burning.

Graham almost ready to hang up, not sure how long it
had been
ringing, seemed like forever. `Yeah.' Riley answers.

`Riley it's me, fuck, I don't... I'm not sure... I
think something's
happened with Xander. He's missing, no sign at home,
shit, have you
seen Buffy?'

`Not since this morning. Don't panic, maybe he just
popped out, why
do you think he's missing?' Graham could hear the
confusion in his
friend's voice.

`God Riley, I dunno, I just know something's wrong.'
He quickly
described the situation to Riley.

`I trust you Gray, if you think something's wrong,
I'll be right
over. I'll just try and get hold of Buffy, gimme 15.'

`Yeah? I'm worried Ri, could she have ???' Didn't want
to finish the
sentence, knew the reaction he'd get.

`Shit no Gray, you gotta trust me too, OK?'

Graham mumbled his acquiescence, still unsure in his
own mind.

'15 okay?'

Silence again. Graham waited.

********************************

`There's no way Graham.' His friend pacing in front of
him. He sat on
the couch with his head resting in his hand. Willow
sitting next to
him stoking his back, gentling cradling his other hand
in hers.

`She wouldn't Graham, I know Buffy. She loves him, she
couldn't hurt
him, she's a gentle person. OK, except for all of the
slaying and
killing, but that's vampires and demons, not Xander.'

Graham felt the witch clasp his hand harder, knew she
was worried
that she was making the situation worse. He began to
nod.

`Yeah? Still something's not right.' He watched Riley
move across the
room, looking at the mess that was there.

`Got to agree with you, definitely a fight and Xander
left his keys?
God we need to get hold of Buffy, see if she knows.
Maybe I'll try
Giles?'

`Here I will.' Willow moved away from Graham, reached
for the phone
and began to dial.

Graham sat on the couch, head resting in both hands
now, reassured to
feel his friend grab him on the shoulder, gentle
squeeze.

`It'll be alright Gray, we'll find him.' He just
nodded in response.

Graham now felt numb. Couldn't tell what he was
feeling, just knew
that he wouldn't feel right until he knew Xander was
okay. Didn't
really hear Willow on the phone. Barely caught any of
the
conversation till she'd hung up.

`No sign of her there either. Giles is expecting her
sometime today.
Said they spoke earlier and that she wanted to go over
a few things
from last night's patrol. Something about a demon she
crossed paths
with. He thinks maybe we should go over there, leave a
note here and
then wait for Buffy. I'll try back at the dorm again,
maybe at her
house as well.' Willow picked up the phone dialling
again.

`Sounds like the best thing to do, you gonna be okay
man?' Graham
looked up to see Riley watching him, knew he was
concerned. He
nodded.

`You need to take anything, you bring anything with
you that you want
to grab?' Could see Riley looking around the room. All
Graham could
focus on was the packet of Oreos. Felt like he was
losing control.
Just wanted Xander back, wanted to give him the
cookies, just make
sure he was okay.

Could feel Riley's arm around him as he tried to
control his
breathing. Knew he was no good to Xander if he broke
down, knew he
just had to be strong for him, strong like Xander
always was.

That gave him the strength. Willow was now off the
phone, the three
moving out the door. Graham locking it behind him. Was
now even more
worried about what may have happened.

********************************

Graham watched Giles remove and polish his glasses for
about the
thousandth time since they'd been here. The three had
barged into the
Englishman's house. Willow had taken Giles aside when
they got there,
the two talking quietly in the ex-Watcher's kitchen.
Graham could see
Giles look across at him.

Graham had replaced his sense of despair with
nervousness and anger.
He began to pace around the room, nervously twisting
his hands,
sombre statement on his face. Anger starting to boil
inside of him,
anger at his inability to help, the futility of just
waiting.

He stopped when Willow and Giles returned. Was worried
at the
expressions the two wore, was about to start pacing
again, when he
realised Giles was holding a steaming cup out for him,
gesturing for
him to sit at the table.

The ex-marine sat down, unsure what to do with the
milky drink before
him. `Tea?'

`Of course, of course, it'll help you settle. Maybe
calm all of our
nerves whilst we wait, I'd rather you didn't track a
trench through
the floorboards with all your pacing.'

Graham had the decency to look chagrined. Still felt a
little unsure
about the tea. Could feel Giles watching him so he
slowly took a
sip. //And yet another reason to be proud you're an
American.//

The action seemed to settle the older man as he began
to sip at his
own cup. `Anyone else?' he moved his hand towards the
pot he'd placed
on the table.

The other two shook their heads quickly, Riley cast a
worried look at
his friend. Trying to hide the pleasure that he'd been
allowed to say
no to the Watcher's offer.

`Well more for us then.' At least Giles looked pleased
at that
sentiment.

After half a cup of tea, to Giles' two, there was
still no news.
Giles had grilled all three of them on the situation,
Willow had been
on the phone most of the time. She'd called Tara and
had asked her to
check at her dorm room to see if Buffy just wasn't
answering. Riley
even popped back to his dorm, to see if she was there.
Still no
sighting.

The waiting was almost becoming unbearable for Graham.
It was almost
dark and there was still no sign that Xander was okay.
Riley had
offered to check back at Xander's, a vain hope that he
may have
returned.

His friend let himself in with Graham's keys, nothing
had changed.
Note still where they'd left it.

Graham was worried if Giles tried to give him anything
else to drink
he might get violent. Nervous energy the only thing
keeping him
going.

`Hey all.' Graham leapt out of his seat when he heard
movement from
the door, felt devastated when he saw who it was.

`Now that's the sort of welcome I like Pet. Nice to
see you all
excited to see me. Uh, any reason why the four of you
are staring at
me like that? Well besides the fact that I might turn
on you at any
second, you know rip your throats out `n all.' Spike
raised his hands
in front of him, forming claws, fake snarl.

`What? Come on get a sense of humour.' The blonde
swaggered in, threw
himself down on the couch.

`Might I ask, what exactly you're doing here Spike?'
The ex-Watcher
remained standing, the others sat when they realised
it wasn't who
they'd hoped it would be.

`Your tellie's bigger `n mine mate, so I thought I'd
pop round. Got
anything to drink?' Already reaching for the remote,
turning the
television on.

Giles reached forward and turned the television back
off. `Now is not
the time Spike, I really think ?'

The blonde not allowing him to finish. `What's up Pet?
You okay?' No
longer interested in the television, his eyes now
fixed on Graham.

The ex-marine still felt uncomfortable in the
Vampire's presence,
knew even though he was chipped and that he couldn't
hurt him, he
still didn't trust him. Too much training to overcome
so quickly.

`Pet?' Graham still hadn't answered. Tried to raise
his voice when
Willow responded.

`Please, not now Spike. We think something's happened
to Xander. We
can't find him and Buffy hasn't turned up.' The
blonde's eyes never
leaving Graham, he moved forward to sit at the table
next to him,
responding to Willow.

`You sure? Maybe I can help. Not with the slayer, no
loss there but
?' Let his voice trail off, could sense that Graham
was uncomfortable
with him sitting so close.

`What's happened to him pet?' The blonde now ignoring
the others.

Riley this time. `It looks like there was a fight at
Xander's, no
sign of him, all his things are still there. We can't
find Buffy
either.

Graham flinched as he saw Spike reach out his hand
towards him. The
Vampire reacted at the same time, pulling his hand
back, leaning back
in his chair, feigning nonchalance.

`Like I said, I can help with the boy, no worries
there mate.' The
blonde crossed his arms across his chest.

`I think we'd be best to wait for Buffy, she may be
our only key to
working out what's happened here.'

Graham looked at Giles from the corner of his eye.
//One thousand and
first time polishing his glasses.//

`Up to you mate, just thought I could help.' Something
seemed to grab
his attention, the blonde swivelling in his chair to
face the door.

`Giles? Oh hi everybody. Okay this doesn't look good,
why are you all
staring at me like that?'

The slayer had returned.

Buffy moved into the room, shutting the door behind
her. `Giles?
Riley?' Graham could sense her eyes on him. `What has
he said?' Her
posture fluidly moving to the defensive.

`Buffy, we think something's happened to Xander, he's
not at home and
we can't find him. We're getting worried we haven't
seen him all
day.' The emotion almost overtaking Willow's voice.

`I don't think there's any cause for worry. He's
probably just
disappeared for awhile, he's been pretty flaky all
week.' He could
hear the disdain in her voice.

Graham knew that comment had been directed at him,
couldn't help
clenching his fists in response. Now having to control
the anger he
felt, he wanted to lash out. Unused to having to be so
passive, the
ex-marine was used to action, and the lack of it was
grating on his
nerves. He wanted to get out, find Xander sort
everything else out
later.

`C'mon Slayer, sounds like the boy's got himself in a
bit of a
pickle, this is no time to go all 90210 on us.'

`This is none of your business Spike, what are you
even doing here?'

Giles moved forward positioning himself between them,
both Spike and
Graham were now standing, tension almost palpable in
the room. Riley
moved to his girlfriend's side, the voice of reason.

`Buffy listen, we've been at Xander's it looks like
there was a
fight.' He turned her around so she was facing him,
trying to explain
what had happened.

Giles tried to restrain Graham and Spike, neither were
pleased at
what the blonde girl had been saying.

`Buffy, no matter what's happening at the moment, I
think we have to
assume that Xander's in danger. Why don't you sit down
and we'll run
through what happened last night. Maybe some Tea?'

A chorus of no's ran around the room.

`Got anything stronger?' Giles didn't even respond to
the Vampire.

********************************

`So let me get this straight.' Giles continued to
polish his
glasses. `You were attacked by a pair of demons last
night whilst on
patrol? You killed one but the other managed to get
away.' He
continued quickly before Buffy could respond to the
blonde Vampire
who'd snorted at that.

`And you didn't see what happened to the other one?'
Buffy shook her
head in response.

`Oh God Giles, you don't think it followed me? I ? I
went to Xander's
this morning.' Her eyes flicked across to Graham.
`I'll need to go. I
can try and track it, I hope nothing's happened to
him.' Her voice
almost silent as she finished.

Riley wrapped his arms around her shoulders. `It must
have taken him
for a reason Buff, I'm sure he'll still be okay.'

`Yes, well that makes sense. We should try and find
what species the
thing was, then start back at the park where you
fought with it last
night.' Giles had stood up, moved to one of the
bookcases in the
room. Removed a large leather bound book and placed it
on the table,
already opening it. Buffy moved to his side, both
pairs of eyes
scanning the pages as she described it.

Graham was surprised to see Spike also move closer,
listening
attentively. `Sounds like a Drighlock demon to me
mate. Nasty
buggers, big teeth, and scaly green skin. Takes a fair
amount of time
to get rid of the smell of them as well. Pretty tough
buggers to
boot.'

Both Giles and Buffy now watching him. Giles quickly
flicked through
the pages of the book, he now seemed more sure of
where to look. He
turned the book so Buffy could see. `Like this?'

`Yeah, that looks about right.' Buffy and Giles
already moving
towards the weapons chest the Englishman kept. Graham
watched Buffy
grab a crossbow from the pile, she also strapped a
large knife to her
waist.

`I'm coming.' Graham stepped forward, unsurprised to
feel everyone
now watching him. Pleased that he could sense Riley
move up next to
him.

`No way.' Buffy stopped what she was doing, moving to
face the ex-
marine, their eyes locked. `Xander's my friend, he's
my
responsibility. It's my fault he's in this mess, I'm
going to get him
out of it.'

`It might be better if you stay Graham.' Disappointed
to hear Riley
agree.

`Riley and I can handle this alone, I think it'll be
best if Giles
and Willow stay here, maybe try and find anything else
about this
Dryrot demon.' Small gesture of her hand as she
finished kitting
up. `Someone will need to go back to Xander's. Wait
there, see if he
turns up.'

The others all deferring to Buffy. Graham felt Riley
place his hand
on his shoulder.

`I'm not going to just sit there and wait for him, I'm
coming.'
Graham was gritting his teeth, trying not to raise his
voice, to let
his true emotions show, jaw pulled tight.

`Graham.' Heard Riley's voice from behind him.

`Not that I want to make a habit of it Pet, but I
agree with the
Slayer. Let them go, we'll go check the whelp's
apartment.' Graham
was surprised to hear Spike's opinion. Apparently so
was Buffy.

`I really think it's best that you stay clear of this
Spike, I've got
enough trouble on my hands without you getting
involved. Riley come
on.' Already moving for the door.

Riley started to follow, then turned back to Graham.
He could see her
past Riley, standing in the doorway, impatient look on
her face.

`It'll be okay Graham, I'll make sure he's alright.
We'll be back
before you notice.' Graham nodded, still not happy
with the
situation. Pleased that at least they had something to
follow up on.

Watched the two leave, Willow moving up to hug him as
she whispered
soothing words.

Graham felt alone. Willow and Giles had moved back to
the table, two
more books to the pile, both concentrating.

Spike moved into his field of vision.

`C'mon Pet lets go.' Wanted to respond, to tell him to
leave him
alone, didn't know what to do instead. Allowed the
blonde to lead him
out the door. Willow still trying to reassure him.

`C'mon then.' Graham had to hurry to catch up with the
Vampire, saw
him lighting a cigarette, coat billowing as he walked.
Graham just
followed.

`Spike wait.' He reached forward, hand on the blonde's
shoulder
stopping him. Spike exhaled cigarette smoke out as he
looked back at
the ex-marine.

`I'm not just gonna sit and wait for him.' The two men
looking at
each other.

`Of course you're not Pet, we're gonna get your man
back.' Spike
wrapped his arm round Graham's shoulders as he led him
forward.

`I've got a pretty good idea where to start looking.'
 

tbc