I decided to do a little shopping to ease my troubled
mind one fine day in
spring. It was a really beautiful day, so what could
be more beautiful than
shopping in Soho on this lovely day in spring?

I strolled into the Helmut Lang store with two
Barney?s bags and one Kenneth
Cole bag. I felt fabulous. Nothing could ruin my
day. Then, something did.

There was Angel with a totally hot, totally new, and
totally
make-me-feel-insignificant
lover in tow. I knew exactly who he was. Riley Finn.
The Iowa native
playwright who
made a killing by writing nothing. He somehow managed
to live this completely
fabulous lifestyle and not sell a single play. Rumor
had it that his company
came at a very hefty price.

As I tried to discreetly sneak out of the store, Riley
turned around and said
with his
Midwestern accent, ?Oh my God! It?s Alex Harris.?

Fuck.

I turned around, big fake smile firmly in place.
?Yes, it?s me. AlexANDER
Harris.?
Angel turned around in that moment, ?Xander??
I smiled coldly, ?Hi, Angel.?
Riley, grinning with those cornfed Iowa farmboy good
looks that just made you
want to knock his teeth in, said, ?You two know each
other??

Of course, what do I care if Cornfed speaks to me,
?So, Angel, it?s a really
sunny day. I hope you brought the dark car. Wouldn?t
want you bursting into
a pillar of flames and dust now would we??

?Xander, a joy as always. Riley, let?s go.?
?Wait a minute! I haven?t picked out of shirt yet!?
Angel hauled Riley out
of the store
by the arm.

Great. Just great. I?m single, and Mr. Undead
Dickhead whom I?m still not
over is
fucking cornfed Iowa boy, Riley Finn. Damn, I need a
cigarette.

I hightailed it out of Helmut Lang soon after they
were gone, but not until I
bought the
most expensive shirt in the store; the one Riley Finn
had his hands on.

In the cab ride home, I thought, ?Are gay love affairs
this forgettable??
Angel and I were together for a year and a half. And
a scant two months
after our inevitable breakup, Angel is seeing another
man. When did gay men
stop having affairs to remember and start having
affairs they wanted to
forget as quickly as possible? Is the long term gay
relationship a myth?

The boys came over to my place for some Chinese
take-out. Giles sucked his
fingers clean of the sweet and sour sauce. ?The right
man is an illusion,
therefore the long-term relationship between men is a
myth.?

Oz walked into the living room with two cartons of lo
mein and pork fried
rice and said, ?I?m afraid, thought it pains me to say
so, that Giles is
right. If I were to speak from
personal experience, the longest any of my
relationships have lasted has been
six months tops.?

Wesley pouted, holding chopsticks and four wine
glasses in one hand and a
bottle of
white wine in the other. ?I disagree! I have heard
about many relationships
between
men lasting.?

Giles looked up, ?Where? Certainly not in New York.
Maybe in the outskirts
of this
state where everyone swills beer and scratches their
arses for the entire
day.?

I slurped some lo mein into my mouth. ?Sweetie, you
do the same thing in the
morning.?

Wesley and Oz giggled. Giles glared at me. ?The beer
was to get rid of the
hangover that I got from drinking at the Bowery Bar
with you as a matter of
fact. And I have only scratched my arse once. You
just happened to be
passed out on my couch when I did it.?

?Well,? Wesley began, ?although I have personally
never had a long term
relationship... (Wes gave a sidelong glance to Giles
who cowered a little.
They both thought Oz and I didn?t notice. We did.)
...I?ve heard stories.
For instance I have a friend who knows someone who?s
been with his partner
for the past seven years. She said they met at a bar
or some party.
Apparently, it was raining fiercely that night, and
that?s when they fell in
love, at the party while it was raining. Or at least
that?s how I remember
the story being told to me.?

?How romantic,? Oz stuck his finger in his mouth and
mock gagged. Giles and I
laughed.

?Gentlemen! Please! It could happen!?
Oz glared at Wesley, ?Sweetie, everyone knows someone
who knows someone else
that met their someone on a rainy night or on some
singles cruise under the
fireworks.?

Giles added, ?Or underneath a starry New York night,
by the Christopher
Street pier
when they had just broken with their boyfriend.?

?Or,? I said, ?at a New Year?s party where the first
person they kissed ended
up being their boyfriend for X amount of years.?

Giles said, ?These are gay urban relationship legends.
It doesn?t happen...
especially in New York City.?
Oz and Wes said together, ?That is so depressing.?

Giles said, ?Nah. I think it gives us poufs something
to look forward to.?

I raised my eyebrow.

After they had all gone, I opened and book and
thought, ?To hell with love.
First, Angel. Now, the illusion of the perfect
relationship. I?ll stick to
my secret stash of Danielle
Steele novels.?

The following day came and went. Lunch with boys. A
meeting with my editor.
And
me trying to avoid Angel?s haunts.

I went to a hole in the wall straight bar somewhere in
Hell?s Kitchen. I
could not take
gay men right now. I just had to get away from the
whole gay urban legend,
Angel, Riley and Doyle thing.

After tipping back a few beers, I was significantly
more depressed. The
breeders were starting to come together for bad slow
dancing to some random
Bonnie Raitt song. I had my own pity party going on,
what did I need any of
them for? So, I did the only logical thing I could
do; cry.

After having my moment for about five minutes, this
gorgeous, tall, muscular,
square-jawed, blue eyed, short-haired Adonis walked up
to me with a look of
concern on his otherwise serious face.

?Dude, are you OK??
?SNIFF I?ll be fine.? I grabbed my coat off of the
bar stool, picked up my
umbrella and
was ready to leave the rinky dink bar when the guy put
his big hand on my
shoulder.
?Hey, are you sure you don?t want to talk about it??

My eyes welled up with tears again. He asked the
bartender for a napkin.

?It?s just stuff you know. I recently broke up with
someone and saw them
with someone else. I had a really awful one night
stand. I mean not the
sex, just the way I felt about myself, you know? SNIFF
And my friends are all
convinced there is no such thing as a long term
relationship.?

?How long did your last relationship last? I?m Graham
by the way.?
?Xander, nice to meet you. SNIFF A year and change.?
?Why did you break up??
?He... uh, she cheated on me with hi...err, her ex.?
Cut me some slack! I
was in a straight bar!
?Aw. Don?t worry about it. There?ll be another one.?

I smiled at this man. He was so sweet. I thought he
would turn on me if he
knew I was a great flaming pouf so I kept up the whole
she this, she that
routine up. It didn?t matter to me at that point. It
just felt good to get
it off my chest.

?Thanks. I certainly hope so. Well, here?s hoping.?
I downed the rest of
my beer.
He smiled softly. Wow. He was painfully handsome.
?Hey, umm, Xander, right??
?That?s right, Graham.?
Even bigger smile, ?Next one?s one me.?
?So, I guess I?m sticking around??
Full out teeth now, ?Sure. They have a Karaoke
machine. I know nothin?
makes me feel better than to watch people make asses
of themselves.?

I liked him already.

After a few more beers, I looked outside. It was
really coming down.
?Graham, it?s been great, but I?m going to get soaked
if I don?t get home
soon.?
?Oh OK. Want some company??
?What about your friends??
He laughed a little. ?Just coworkers. They?ll
understand. Do you have an
umbrella??
?Yep! I?m always prepared.?
Still smiling at me he said, ?Let?s go.?

I was extremely confused. Either this is the NICEST
straight guy alive or he
was
honestly and truly coming on to me. Nah, he couldn?t
be. I looked like
hell. My eyes were all bloodshot and red-rimmed. My
face was puffy from the
crying. I looked like an unmade bed.
?How far away do you live??
?About ten blocks on the East side.?
We stepped outside.

Graham said, ?I don?t have an umbrella. Do you mind
if I share it with you??
I was lit up like a Christmas tree. ?Not at all.
Now, we have options.
Cab, train or
walk??
?How?s about we walk??
?Sure.?

?You know, Xander, you?ve just gotta be grateful for
the time you?ve got with
people.
Cherish each little moment. They all mean a lot.
They also teach us a
little bit about ourselves.?
?You mean like how much you?re willing to put up with
until you lose it??
Laughter. ?Yeah, there?s that. And how much you?re
willing to love someone.?

I slowed my pace. He was absolutely right. Plus, we
were a block away from
my
building.

?I guess you?re right.?
Some silence and I said, ?Well, here I am.?
?Yeah, cool. Nice building.?
?Thanks.?

I closed the umbrella, and gave him a quick handshake.
Before I could get to
the top of the stairs, a significantly more wet Graham
said to me from the
bottom of the stairs, ?Hey, do you want to do
something sometime??

I turned around with a big knowing smile on my face.
He WAS coming on to me.
Yay! I walked down the stairs, the umbrella still at
my side. Graham
smiled broadly. When I got to the penultimate step,
he wrapped those big
arms of his around my waist and kissed me softly.
Damn, he could kiss.
Those big hands of his brought me in closer. Our
leather jackets were making
squeaking noises with our movements in the rain. And
there on my staircase,
we kissed for about an hour in the pouring New York
rain.

So, maybe the gay urban legend is true. Maybe this
one will last longer than
anything else I?ve had. All I know is that my new
friend Graham is right.
Whatever time you get with someone you have to be
grateful for. Little
things mean the most. And everyone who comes into
your path is there to
teach you something. Every lesson learned is
valuable. I?m grateful for the
time that I had with Angel. I?m happy he?s found
someone else. And now, I?m
going to be cherishing the time I?m allotted with
Graham.

I have to call Wesley!

~Fin

**********************************************************************************

TITLE: The Guy Thing 1/?
AUTHOR: Otsoko
E-MAIL: otsoko@hotmail.com
SUMMARY: Xander catches up with Riley at Willey's Place.
RATING: PG-13

TITLE: Entreat (2/?)
AUTHOR: Pablo
EMAIL: little_claps@yahoo.com
DISTRIBUTION: If you're interested just gimme a yell.
SPOILERS: Nothing specific S4 Buffy (Kind of)
CLASSIFICATION: Xander/Graham
SUMMARY: Graham has another chance to talk to Xander.
RATING: A warm blooded PG-13, set the wheels in
motion.
FEEDBACK: Hello ??? What do you think ???
DISCLAIMER: I don't own nothing.
DEDICATION: Thanks to Yvette for the beta and everyone
for all the
feedback :-)

********************************

Graham pushed open the door to his dorm room with his
foot, and
dumped the books he'd carried back with him from the
library onto his
desk. The majority of his day had been spent studying
and the start
of a headache was already threatening to make the rest
of the day
even worse.
Graham sighed as he removed his shoes. Stretching to
remove the kinks
in his back from being hunched over a badly lit desk,
surrounded by
other students yammering away. What was it about
Libraries that
people couldn't understand?

`Fun Day?' Riley leaning against his still open door.
Wearing his
good red shirt, so he must have a "hot date" planned.

Graham doesn't even bother to answer just shakes his
head
noncommittally.

`Thought you might need a study break so I've invited
you along for
the evening'. Confusion obvious on Graham's face so
Riley continues
to explain. `We're going to meet up with Buffy and
some of her
friends in about half an hour so you better get
cracking.'

`And I have no say in this, why?' The last thing
Graham needs right
now is Riley being all over protective and trying to
get Graham out
for the evening. The ex-marine can already see his
plans for a quiet
night are out the door. Riley just gives him "that"
look so Graham
relents. `Yeah sure, but I gotta get changed, and
where are we going
and when you say Buffy's friends who do you mean, and
please don't
tell me you're gonna try setting me up with someone,
cause Ri we've
been through this ...'
Actually manages to shut Riley up as he moves towards
his wardrobe,
grabs the nearest shirt off the hangar, and throws it
on the bed,
wonders if he needs to change his pants as well.
Assumes these ones
will be fine.

`OK I might need a pen for this but lets see, getting
changed won't
take long, we're going to the bronze, ah' memory
ticking
over, `Friends ... Willow, Tara and Xander, which I
guess answers the
final part about me setting you up huh?'. Ticking off
on his fingers
as he goes.

Riley doesn't notice the look on Graham's face as he
finishes his
sentence.
Graham moves straight back to his wardrobe, surveys
the clothes
hanging, some on the floor. `Sure, just gimme about 10
minutes to
change.' Trying to decide between his good black pants
or the tan
ones he's only just bought. Wonders which ones Xander
would prefer.

`Yeah sure, 10 minutes, just grab me when you're
ready.' Riley shuts
the door as he leaves the room.

20 minutes later, Graham closes the door behind him
and moves down
the hall to Riley's room. Riley standing there
waiting, talking to a
few of their buddies, Graham nods a greeting, he can
tell Riley's
already tired of waiting, not concerned after last
night. `I thought
I'd better take a shower', explanation enough as he
moves past the
others towards the stairs and the way out.

Over at the Bronze, 5 dollar cover charge. Graham not
that pleased
considers making Riley pay since he made him come
anyway, then
remembers he'll get to spend some more time with
Xander and thinks
that the Bronze could make a whole lot more money if
they upped the
cover.
Once inside, Graham scans the crowd hoping to catch a
glance of him.
Sees Buffy standing over by one of the couches,
talking to a couple
of figures sitting. Follows Riley towards them.

Greetings exchanged, Riley tries to re-introduce
Graham to Willow,
whom he's met. Guess Xander's ribbing from the night
before has
effected him. Graham likes that fact. Meets Tara,
timid girl,
obviously very much in love with Willow as they sit
together on the
couch. Hands unconsciously brushing each other.
Intimate without even
noticing.

No Xander. OK not how Graham had planned the night
whilst he was
getting changed. Admits to himself that most of how he
planned the
night occurred whilst he was in the shower, and that's
why he was a
bit late. Didn't think Riley would have liked to
receive that
explanation. Memory still doesn't help obscure the
fact that Xander's
not here.

`Just the three of you tonight?' Graham decides
subtlety may be the
best approach as he questions Willow.

`Uh Yeah, Xander's supposed to be here as well but he
said he might
be a little busy with Anya.' Graham tries to hide the
disappointment
as he takes a seat. Riley offers to get a drink, as he
fends off
conversation from Willow and Tara. Well mainly Willow.

Riley brings him a beer and then goes off to dance
with Buffy.

`So Riley mentioned you guys were adjusting well to
civilian life.'
half an hour later and still no sign of him. Buffy
monopolising
Riley's time so Graham seems to be Willow's new
"project". She's
already asked him questions about what he's studying,
his childhood,
whether or not he has a girlfriend. Graham deciding
whether or not he
should answer truthfully and tell the redhead the only
thing that's
keeping him here is the opportunity to check out her
incredibly hot
friend with the cute smile. Decides that's probably
not the best
thing to do and responds noncommittally instead.

Buffy and Riley come back from dancing and Graham can
tell already
what they're gonna say. Guess all that close contact's
gone straight
to certain parts of their anatomies and it's so not
their heads.

`You'll be OK Gray? we're probably gonna just call it
a night.'

Riley holds Buffy's hand not overly interested in
Graham's response
but that's OK with Graham, he'd probably be just the
same if he was
with Xa ... with someone he cared for. Mentally
corrects himself.

The two of them moving towards the door, barely after
Graham's opened
his mouth to respond. Willow just smiling and shaking
her head. Turns
her attention back to Graham. `So how long have you
and Riley been
friends?'. Graham wonders how long before he can
extricate himself
from her clutches.

Graham actually getting involved in a conversation
with Willow fails
to notice him, until Tara looks up and says hi. Graham
stands up when
he sees who it is. Heart rate already increasing.
Secretly glad he
wore his new tan pants. Moves to offer his hand to
Xander, notices
his face.

`Are you OK Xan?' Willow can tell straight away
something is wrong.
Xander flops down next to her on the couch leaving
Graham standing,
chairless.

`Well I guess it was only a matter of time.' Xander
leans his head on
Willows shoulder and closes his eyes. `So the reason
I'm late is
cause I just spent the last hour trying to convince
Anya not to leave
me.'

Even Graham can sense the tremors in Xander's voice as
Willow begins
stroking his hair softly. She tries to respond but
Xander won't let
her.

`I mean I guess it was inevitable, but I thought that
maybe this time
it would work, I think I need a drink, you want a
drink Willow, you
Tara? I'm gonna get a drink. How bout you Graham,
drink?' Xander only
just now noticing the ex marine standing over him. `Oh
hi, sorry bout
that, gimme 5 more minutes and I'll be ready for the
next act in the
pity play that is my life'.

Graham tries to respond but it seems nervous energy
has taken control
of the dark haired man. `I'll get you a drink, you'll
get drunk with
me right? These two, their problem is they can't
handle it. But us
guys we'll get drunk.' Xander already off and moving
towards the bar.
Back before he even reaches it.
`Uh Graham, since, you know you've been exposed to all
the pitiful
aspects of my life tonight already, think you could
grab us a drink?
I left my ID at home.'

Xander smiles for the first time tonight but Graham
can tell it's a
pale imitation of what the boy gifted him last night.
`Sure man, I'll
grab them. You just take a seat.' Gestures back to the
spot next to
Willow on the couch. Makes sure Xander is sitting
before moving up to
the bar.

********************************

`So, I'm just really pleased that I got her to promise
me she
wouldn't get back into vengeance, although I guess she
left me so
that doesn't count right? Right? Yeah I'm sure that
doesn't count.'

Graham can tell Xander has had too much to drink. The
emotion of the
situation seems to have taken it's toll. Willow and
Tara both look
concerned but it's obvious that they both need to get
home to sleep.
Graham wants to tell them it's OK he'll look after
Xander, but he's
unsure how that will sound.

Tara attempting to stifle a yawn, knows that Willow
will feel better
if she's here to look after Xander but knows she feels
just as tired.
Xander stands to get another drink, a little unsteady
on his legs,
ends up back down on the couch next to his friend.

`Xander, don't you think you should go home? If you
like we'll grab
you a taxi?' Willow, unsure how to convince the drunk
man to leave
without offending him.

`No, nothing to drink at home. I'm fine, if you guys
want to go I'll
be fine. Anyway Graham's here, he'll take care of me.'
Three sets of
eyes look towards Graham, sitting on the seat next to
the edge of he
couch the others are sharing. Graham quickly stifles
the smile that
comment elicits from him and nods his head, hoping he
comes across
reassuringly not lecherously like he feels. Willow
seems OK with that.

`If you're sure', mumbled agreement from Xander in
response. The two
witches stand, both giving Xander a hug, Willow
whispering
reassurances in his ear. Tara smiles across at Graham
and waits
patiently for her girlfriend.

`If he causes any trouble, you tell me.' Willow
focused on Graham
now, still holding onto Xander's hand. Graham's eyes
travel
unconsciously from her arm to her hand to Xander's
hand then
arm. `I'll leave you some money so he can grab a taxi
OK?' The witch
already opening her purse, full on mother mode.

`It'll be fine Willow.' Graham holds up his hands
signalling he's in
control. `I promise you I'll take care of him'. Willow
moves in to
give Graham a hug. Whispers in his ear, Graham unsure
why she
bothered as Xander probably wouldn't hear anyway. `Try
and get him to
go home OK?'

`Yeah, just another half hour or so.' Graham whispers
back. One more
hug from Xander then the two girls are gone. Graham
watches them
leave. Turns back to make sure Xander's alright. He's
sitting
sprawled on the couch again, although it takes a
moment for Graham to
notice. Xander's smiling again. Full face smile, eyes
lit up. Graham
can't help but respond in kind. Feels a bit guilty as
the last thing
he wants to do right now is let Xander go home. Well
alone anyway.
Graham mentally kicks himself for thinking like that.
Doesn't know if
Xander's interested anyway, and wants more from him
than that if he
is. Remembers the dark haired man has just split up
with his
girlfriend and tries to focus on something less
stimulating than
those beautiful brown eyes and that flirtatious smile.

`So Graham, now it's just the two of us you wonna move
on to
something more serious?' Dark eyes staring straight
into the still
standing mans face.

Graham's worried he may suffer from a coronary when
Xander says this
and his smile if possible seems to get even bigger.
`Ah yaaa ...'
Graham curses the fact that he seems to have forgotten
how to speak.

`I'll take that as a yes, two tequilas it is' Xander
stands a little
unsteadily and moves towards the bar. Bartender
stopped asking for ID
about four rounds ago. Graham watches him move and
can't help but
appreciate the view. Silently smirking to himself,
wondered what was
happening, had assumed he'd fallen asleep and been
dreaming when
Xander posed that question.

Two shots each later and Graham is now determined not
to let Xander
drink anymore. Well that and the fact that he doesn't
think he can
trust himself if he continues to drink as well.
Definitely feeling a
little drunk himself, despite the fact that he hasn't
been drinking
as much as the other man. The ex-marine had moved from
his seat and
was now sitting next to Xander on the couch. Both men
facing towards
each other, knees almost touching. Xander was regaling
Graham with
yet another story about Willow. It seemed he'd chosen
her as a safe
topic. Graham was definitely enjoying himself.

`Xan?'. Graham tried interrupting the other man during
a particularly
weird story involving the witch and some sort of
computer demon or
something. `I just wanted to tell you how much of a
good time I've
had tonight.' Graham lowered his eyes and waited for
Xander to
respond. `I mean I'm sorry about the whole you and
Anya thing but
it's been good getting to know some more of Buffy's
friends. Riley's
always trying to get me to you know talk to Willow and
Buffy ... and
you.' Graham slowly looked up at Xander's face.

`Uh, Graham. You do know Willow's a Lesbian right?'
Graham could only
laugh in response.
`Yeah Xan, I didn't mean that.'

`You have a girlfriend Graham?' Graham takes a moment
for that to
register. Xander waits for a response. His eyes never
once leaving
Graham's face. Under such close scrutiny the ex marine
hopes Xander
didn't notice him blush.

`No, I...'

`Good'.

Good? Had Xander just said good.

`You and me, two bachelors. It'll be us against the
world huh?'.
Graham had almost forgotten how drunk Xander was.
Graham was about to
respond when Xander lurched forward and wrapped his
arm around
Graham's shoulder pulling him closer.

`We don't need girls huh Gray? Just us. They just use
us and leave us
anyway right?' Not waiting for a response Xander
continued on his
tirade. As comfortable as Graham now felt in his new
position he
thought it best to suggest a change.

Graham rather reluctantly removed the other man's arm
from round his
shoulders and sat back. Xander was still talking.
Graham tried hard
to concentrate on what the other man was saying, even
though he knew
it was drunken rambling, but he kept getting
distracted by the fact
that Xander's hair had fallen down and was now
obscuring his eyes.
Graham didn't like that, as he believed if he was
going to be sitting
with Xander, he really should be able to see the man's
beautiful
eyes.

So without thinking he reached across and pushed back
the lock of
hair that had fallen across his eyes. Graham let the
back of his
fingers trail across Xander's forehead before he
realised what he was
doing and then snatched his hand back.

Xander, momentarily confused, stopped talking and
focused those eyes
on Graham's now obviously blushing face. After only a
moment Xander
started up the conversation again. This time with a
rather large
smile on his face.

Graham quickly decided he had had more than enough to
drink and it
was time to go. Xander seemed to have no problem when
Graham
suggested this and within moments the two were on
their way home in
separate cabs. Graham taking a few minutes to find out
Xander's
address so he could ask the driver to make sure the
other man got
home safe. An extra 20 was all it took.
Graham mused on the way home that he would rather have
walked the
other man back to his apartment. Made sure he was
safe, but knew that
you just didn't do that sort of thing in a town like
Sunnydale.

Graham swore to himself that concern for Xander's
safety was the only
reason he'd requested his address from him. Always
paid to be careful
after all, and if he just happened to remember the
address, that was
just fine by the ex-marine. Graham couldn't help but
smile on the
quick taxi ride home.

tbc