" the currency of science is not truth but doubt . . . .

. . . . . the question of whether the universe is a steady state or big bang or whether it has ten diamensions or four, is just decorative trim around the grand mystery of why anything or any law exists.

by reminding us of our deep cosmic ignorance, science far from divulging the mystery of existence, sharpens it the way garlic wafting in the evening breeze whets our appetite.

it reminds us that we dwell in a mystery that is ultimately to be savoured than solved."

dennis overby
time, may 24, 1993.

i got it from an old note book of mine. the authors surname is not very clear. this happens very often - my hand writing is so bad i myself wont be able to make out what i have written later on. i can write legibly; but that inherent laziness creeps in within no time and the result is an indecipherable document.

" few tragedies can be more extensive than the stunting of life, few injustices deeper than the denial of an oppertunity to strive or even to hope, by a limit imposed from without, but falsely identified as lying within"

- stephen jay gould

" - - so limited is his intelligence and his imagination that he is never puzzled for a moment.

one of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision."

: russel, in new hopes for a changing world.

"- - - - - - I always think those people fortunate who are contend to stand without question by the ten commndments, knowing exactly how to conduct themselves and propped up by the hope of pardise on the one hand and by the fear of a cloven-footed devil with pincers on the other.

But we, who answer why to the crude thou shalt not, are like sailors in a wintry sea without a compass - - - - - - - -"

: maughm

"anxiety"
the first time you cannot do it a second time.

"panic"
the second time you cannot do it the first time.

"psychiatrist"
an illiterate under an illusion
that he can decipher the scriptures and "explains" the meaning to the laity.

a. the getting out part :

where is the hurry?

now suppose srivisakh ( it was a cinema theatre in the city - i think it is still there. ) is showing a good movie. if you dont rush you might miss it altogether and you may not get another chance to watch it at all. ( i am NOT talking about the present, where you can easily watch the movie of your choice in the comfort of your bed room, but about the bad old yonder years a quarter century back). this particular show, i mean death, on the other hand, is something which none of us is going to miss. so now that we are here, there is no harm hanging on a bit more; and may be, watching the fun with detachment.

yes, there is no hurry.

b. about the kid part:

i agree with larkins one hundred percent; and will go even further. if at all there is anything called sin it is dragging another life into this world; all the more so when you could have avoided it.

i read this part of larkins advice with relief; relief that i have company, for i was wondering why i alone should be getting this sort of "morbid" thoughts. it was a big relief to know that there was at least one other character - and could be many more - who thought on thhhe same lines as i did. and that was the reason why i noted down his lines.

by the way have you noticed that the clergy of almost all major religions take a vow of celibacy ? i think the objection of the great religious teachers was not to sex itself but to the inevitable result of it - another birth.

the ultimate aim of a hindu is moksha - moksha from rebirths and merging with the paramathma. ( am i right there ? ) then why do you want to drag another life into this earth ?

reproduction is not in mans interest, but is in the interests of nature. it is not just like that, that nature has made sex a pleasurable act; nature is luring you; tricking you into reproducing. scheming, cunning, brute nature !

your forefathers didn't have a choice; for many of them, especially of the poorer lot, the only recreation available was procreation, i mean raw sex. with the inevitable result - children.

you are lucky; your generation has the power; you can have the pleasures sans the pains -
make love, not babies.

" ......... one has to be very sure of oneself to go against the ordinary way of things. and if one is not, perhaps it is better not to run any risks but just to walk along the same secure old road as the common herd. it is not exhilarating, it is not brave and it is rather dull; but it is eminently safe. "

: william morris.

"..... fate was not kind, life was capricious and terrible and there was no good or reason in nature.

But there is good and reason in us, in human beings with whom fortune plays and we can be stronger than nature and fate, if only for a few hours. And we can draw close to one another in times of need, understand and love one another and live to comfort each other.

And sometimes when the black depths are silent we can do even more; we can then be gods for a moment, stretch out a commanding hand and create things which were not there before and which when they are created, continue to live without us. Out of sounds, words and other frail and worthless things we can construct intellectual and lyrical toys, we can create philosophies and songs full of meaning and comfort, more beautiful and enduring than the grim sport of fate and destiny.

We cannot evade life's course but we can school ourselves to be superior to fortune and also to look unflinchingly on the most painful of things. "

= herman hesse ( gertrude - english translation )