yes, that's right, i work at a discount retail chain that was once worldwide, yet has dropped all international branches from its direct control in order to concentrate on getting its struggling company back up to what it used to be and more. i manage a department in that store and still get treated like a new guy after over six years. i swear that nearly every customer who walks into the store leaves his or her brains in the car. customers have no consideration for anything; they think that everything they could potentially buy is theirs to do with as they please.

FINDING THE DEPARTMENT
the first thing i noticed in discount retail shoppers (hereafter referred to as DRS) when i began working in this environment is that they will have something they want to buy. in this example, say: greeting cards.

the average DRS will not ask for help until they are seriously flustered as to the location of the thing they want. in our store, we have the entrance, to the left is the checkouts, then JUST BEYOND THAT is the greeting card department.

for the first six months of my employment, more than half the customers walked by the greeting cards, stared at the signs that said "hallmark," walked away, walked back, walked through the department, browsed through a few cards, then came up to me and asked "where are the cards?"

OLD JEDI MIND TRICKS
this kodak moment is brought to you by the fact that the customer doesn't specify "cards." we retail employees cannot (usually) read minds. cards could mean greeting cards, poker cards, collectible cards, credit cards, cash cards, etc.

so i ask the DRS "what kind of card?" and then they get this look like you should know exactly what they want and just crawl around and bark like a duck in heat until you have forecast the next year's worth of weather and suddenly summoned the perfect card they need magically into their cart/hands/pocket... yeah, right. seriously.

UNCOMMON SENSE & THE LANGUAGE BARRIER
then there is the ethnic diversity of our local customer base. we have people from all countries around the world. first they expect us to have a translator handy for every moment they visit our store. then, if that is not possible, they go around trying to find domeone who can figure out what they are saying.

now i have no problem with where they come from or who they are, but if they come to a country where the primary language is english - even though it is not the official language - they could at least learn the basic words - like "hi" or "bathroom" or "do you need help?" or even "yes" or "no" - but why would they bother to do that?

and of course, we americans have a common sense here that no other country in the world seems to accept as common... our common sense is based upon the history and cultural references to slang and events in life. i would give an example but i cannot think of one right now... maybe later. my point here is: these people have no fucking clue!

SHOPLIFTERS
shoplifters are the reason price increases occur. when an item is stolen, the store must raise prices to cover the cost of that item. this causes inflation and decrease in happiness amongst the rest of the customers who wonder why the prices go up...

the most fucking annoying thing with shoplifters is that they cause descrimination toward certain ethnic groups. more than 50% of all shoplifters are hispanic; (it is a fact!) 30% are white and less than 20% are black. these numbers are based on the cumulative reports from the security chief at my retail outlet (rounded off). more than half of all shoplifters are actually mothers with children, while the rest include kids under twelve, teenagers, and senior citizens.

when a person of hispanic origin walks into the store, they are more often watched because of the people of their race who essentially rape the retail market. not all hispanic people are bad; in fact, most of the latinos i know are very nice and wonderful people. i grew up in a diverse neighborhood (the projects), so i have nothing against whites, blacks, or latinos.

my point is, too many people who shoplift do not realise the impact it will have on how people of the same ethnicity as themselves are treated in the future. they are fools and they just don't give a shit because they love the thrill and challenge and the free stuff...

VANDALISM
bathroom stall grafitti can be very cute, or very annoying. some of it is quite amusing, while most is pathetic and totally un-original. not to mention the immaturity of what most people scratch into the wall, like: "for great head, call 555-SUCK" - how pathetic.

the other form of vandalism occurs with spray paint. in the hardware and automotive departments of the retail chain that i work at, our counters are a multitude of colors. this is due to the fact that most DRS's are not intelligent enough to realise that the color of the lid on the can of paint is the color of the paint inside the can. so we end up raising prices due to the cost of cleaning or replacing the shelves, if we even get around to doing that...