may 29th.

may 28th.
In pre-emptive attack to what you will most inevitably presume, I will merely say, the following statement is not intended in any way to have a degree of vanity embededded within. It is simply a reflection based on the verbal ejaculations of various authority figures and parents:
i really like the idea that i had something beautiful,
so i purposely scarred it.

may 27th.

. says:
hi
+sick says:
hi
. says:
what is the meaning of life?
+sick says:
there is none.
+sick says:
humans are stupid and ignorant and idiots enough to think they deserve meaning.
+sick says:
thats the whole point, that there is no point.
+sick says:
humans were put on earth to suffer, and we dont deserve a decent explanation as to why
+sick says:
in my debate in french class
+sick says:
this girl said she didnt LIKE the idea of destiny, of unseen hands controlling her fate
+sick says:
well SHIT BITCH
+sick says:
do you think EVERYTHING is going to mould the universe around what you like and dont fucking like>
+sick says:
you dont deserve to like thigns!!!
+sick says:
you dont deserve to SPEAK! you dont deserve to wear clothes or be in a classroom or be ALIIVE
+sick says:
what the FUCK make syou think YOU have a say in ANYTHING that happens in the world?! no! NO you dont have a say!
. says:
haha, that was amazing

may 26th.
what the fuck am i supposed to do about you?
...wanna fight?

may 22nd.
it turns out yesterday really was the 21st,
i wrote the wrong dates on the food at work.
hdasklfhaklyru3iorlahfasjk
paul, youre right

part two:
LIAR LIAR and his wooden body floated away!;

NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
NOW I WONDER HOW I WAS MADE
MY ARMS MY LEGS MY HEART MY FACE

may 19th.

may 15th.

Destiny Exists.

too often, we make the assumption that destiny is a product of god or a belief of romantics and optimists. destiny is a fixed, predetermined future that is impossible to change. As human beings, we always expect our futures to be happy and perfect. As human beings we are greedy, gullible and ignorant to think that we deserve happiness.

The human race is the worst thing to have ever existed. the world is full of people who will kill you while you walk to your car, who will take you hostage when you are just trying to get money from the bank to feed your family. the world is full of people who will drug you when you drink, who will rape you when you lose consciousness, who will honk at you because you are not driving fast enough for them, people who will say "excuse me" but in the meanest way possible.

The world suffers a million illness, unemployment, starvation, political and social injustice, the destruction of species and resources, the lies of religion, the devalorisation of sexuality, and descrimination. The world is full of people who take pleasure in watching you squirm when you are hated and unwanted, and full of people who will sabotage you when you are happy and well liked.

All of our accomplishments have been in the interests of one person, never anyone else. We are ungrateful to be alive, we have let greed kill our only world, and now there is too much pain to change. We can do nothing but fail.

That is destiny.

may 14th.
5:28pm - standing over the water! right now, right now! I'M DOING THIS, OK?

forearm hurts. product of girl night.
refuse to take these pants off until
they are baggy to the power of 6

may 11th.
dear _______n_,
the way you are is not ok.
you seem to really like telling yourself that
this is okay,
simply because other people tell themelves that its ok too.
its not.
do you really want to
be like them?
breaktime is over.
dont you remember how happy
quantitative figures used to make you feel
stop caving.
throw it out.
throw it out until there is nothing left
but sharp angles
collarbone-jawbone-hipbone
until there is nothing left but
ribbones-cheekbones-breastbone
bones

may 10th.
big headache.
substance abuse.
flower cookies, pez candy, lost my penguin
big faces french accents
wtf happened in fourth period

may 5th.
happy/ruined.
give you money if you'll just
tell me what I'm supposed to do.
not used to holding all the cards
never be good at poker if
i'm playing for no losers.
I dont care what I said, the
numbers on the scale are
pissing me off
don't think I'll ever really change

may 3rd.
sat in seat 14 today on the bus.
numbers are always everywhere.
5 1/4 on the fire hydrant.
1004 on the house.
my silhouette has a nice shape.
makes me happy for now