With the exception of Tom, who, apparently, is a “technophobe – he doesn’t bone computers”, I managed to squash Roo, Hamish and Andrew from Burning Coalition into one of those little MSN conversations, since they’re so unreliable when it comes to arranging a time to meet and interview them properly. Still, as Roo says: “The internet’s lots of fun. You can get naked and shake, and no one can see you”….

This is Burning Coalition’s interview. Expect to giggle.

You lot have been kinda quiet over the last few months: not many gigs or Ep releases or anything. Have you been recording lots of things in a cave somewhere or have you just been plain lazy?

Hamish: I’ve been fucking lazy; I haven’t got a job or nothing. It’s been fun!
Roo: Yeah, the past few months have been annoying gig wise.
Andrew: But we have been working on our new CD, trying to get it finished. However, we’re slack so um….well, it isn’t finished.

Will you be having a comeback anytime soon? The streets of Plymouth are quiet without you…

A: July should be hardcore.
R: I think we’re pretty hardcore now. And info on the CD…it’s gonna be called Infused With Purest Fire.
A: Since when?!
R: OK, the CD isn’t called that…
H: I wanted to call the CD ‘Burning Coalition......In Valhala’. A: Featuring Roo’s home videos as extras!
R: HOME VIDEOS!!
H: Or 'Burning Coalition.....Phallic Secrets'.......

Shh now Hamish. So, you’re supporting Death By Stereo soon, right? Excited?

R: (three big smiley emoticons appear on the screen)
H: How can she transcribe that?!
R: She can draw pictures. Of smiling faeces. I mean, faces.
H: Oh right.
A: Anyway…totally excited, they’re one of my favourite bands!

And what were you all up to last night?

R: I got drunk and started a ruckus. Half my face looks like part of Good Charlotte now: fat and with runny mascara.
H: Hahaha, do the other side.
A: Roo was being a dick at the No Comply gig, so someone smacked him! And Hamish kicked him when he was down.
H: That was a lame thing to do. To the guy who punched Roo: I’m very sorry.

Are you really, or are you trying to secure a new fan?

R: Haha fans. I think we gave up people expecting to like us.
H: Well, I don’t think he’ll be much of a fan of ours now.
R: I dunno, maybe he won’t remember who we are? With my newly shaped face and all!

What’s the best thing in all the world?

R: Love.
H: Roo getting beat…
A: The sandwich Roo made me today!
R: Can I change my answer? Sandwich beats love.
H: I like those ones you used to make…you know, the ones that used to hurt to eat.

Final words, anyone?

A: Um…I hope you’re going to edit this interview!
H: Why can’t we do good interviews? The Whole Truth one is going to be so much better than ours….
R: Er….be really nice to everyone. Cos otherwise the world doesn’t work properly.
H: Yeah, and don’t punch guys in the face. It’s mean!

Burning Coalition may or may not be playing the Quay Club tomorrow night. No one actually knows. But go check out www.burningcoalition.tk for updates!!!!

Written by Luce