'The Immortal' Jeff Hardy

Three Men... Three Matches... One Winner!
Thursday Night Turmoil ~ December 23, 04

- Opening Scene - A cWe arena. A full capacity crowd on the edge of their seats. What's going to happen next? The lights in the arena begin to strobe in different color patterns. Lasers make the shapes of what seem to be the various ICP 'Jokers Cards' as 'Juggalo Homies' begins to play. Stage hands role out a six foot bottle of Faygo. Pyro begins to spray out of it as Shaggy 2 Dope and Violent J come from behind the curtains, each with a two litre Faygo bottle. The begin shaking the bottle and sprayin them on the crowd as they make their way to the ring. Shaggy gets in the ring and kicks his half empty bottle into the crowd. J continues around the ring shaking and slapping hands with the crowd and taunting those who rufuse. 'Juggalo Homies' fades out as Shag pulls a mic from his pocket.

' Stanky Twickle Puss ' Shaggy 2 Dope :
"All six cards have come, as we said they would.
We tried to save you're lives... We did the best we could
We showed you Shangri La, then ventured to Hell's Pit
You just blew it off and said, 'We don't give a shit!"
Well now you better listen, what we say wil effect your fate.
Turmoil is the beggining, we've already set a date!
A new warrior has arisen on the side of good.
We don't know what you're thinkin, but we'll tell ya what you should! "

- Current Scene - J has also made his way into the ring and pulled a mic out as well.

' Mr. Rotten Treats ' Violent J :
"In a time of false prophets like Messiah, Mordecai, and the Taker
One man comes along and shows you all your fuckin maker.
Juggalos and juggaletes gather round to hear this story
I swear we'll bloody some necks and make this shit real gory!
Now as we kick it I spit it you take it all in,
Cause some ninjas aren't quick to get witcha when singin this shit
Do or die, We know where we're goin.
We've been tellin the tale for many years now Finally we have some force.
We've got a guy who lives by the word And will die by that shit of course! "

' Stanky Twickle Puss ' Shaggy 2 Dope :
"It' been said he's too extreme and that he has no fear
Always doin shit that mkes the people cheer
Flyin off ladders and taken shit to new heights
Boys got enough air time tah ge a thousand free flights!
He's back now with the message to you to can be free
He's back now to save you all... BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY! "

- Current Scene - The lights fade out. A blue spot light shines on the enterance ramp as 'Savior' by Skillet begins. As the drums kick in and the guiatar hits it first power chord Jeff sprints out onto the ramp. Jeff points to the crowd as the blue from the spotlight spreads throughout the arena. Multi colored lights pulse with the guitar as Jeff dances around and sprints to th ring. Now in the ring Jeff climbs a turnbuckle and does the trademark 'twin guns'. Jeff does this on the remaining three turnbuckles as well. The lights begin to fade up and 'Savior' fades out as Jeff gets off the final turnbuckle. Jeff reaches between the ropes and grabs a mic from the ringside assistant.

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "Championship Wrestling Entertainment, your savior has arrived! Jeff Hardy is back with a message of fullfillment. The last time you saw me I had just returned from an institution and was battling with demons in my head. I stand before you now a new man. I stand before you now a somber soul. I want each and every one of you to feel what I do... And you will... Yes, all of you will feel it in due time. As my friends said 'By any means necessary' is the motto we live. And it is by any means necessary that you will come to be whole...

...As with every mission there must be a starting point. Ours begins Thursday night on Tumoil with a man named Tommy Dreamer. From what I'm told this won't be an easy task. I've heard this man relishes in pain and lives every moment like it is his last. Well Tommy, I know not what pain is and when your immortal you have no last moment. For what ends in this life is just the beggining in the next...

...I used to be a dreamer to Tommy... Now I don't need to dream, everything I could ever want or desire is mine. I need not and want not. When your left with nothing and all alone you begin searching for something. Something to fil the void. Then when that something comes along, you learn that what you thought you needed so bad was inside you the entire time. Then all you can do is hide from the fear that's deep inside. It's when that fear is overcome that you truely reach serenity."

- Current Scene - Jeff walks to the ropes and climbs out. Shaggy and J follow him. They begin to walk up the ramp.

' Mr. Rotten Treats ' Violent J :
"Follow us if you will, because soon you'll have no choice,
I know it's getting dark, just follow the sound of my voice.
The time draws near to break out the axes and spill the evil blood
Watch out Father cause soon they'll come like water in a flood! "

' Stanky Twickle Puss ' Shaggy 2 Dope :
"Tommy Dreamer your just the first in our sacred mission
Soon we'll show you what we know and give you brand new vision.
If you chose to keep doing things your way
We'll bloody ya neck with a rusty axe and then we'll let ya stay... "

' Mr. Rotten Treats ' Violent J :
"Right up on our mantle with the other heads we've amassed
Time to make some choices before your chances pass."

- Current Scene - Now in the back of the arena the Jeff approaches a dumpster and Shaggy and J venture off. Jeff notices a pair of feet sticking out by a dumpster. He procedes over to them and notices a man braced up against the dumpster, asleep and covered in newspaper. Jeff nudges the man with his foot. The man wakes up violently.

' Stinky ' Bum : "Wha?! What the fuck do you want? I'm not hurting anybody here! Your not a cop.. What do want?"

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "Easy guy, I just wanted to see how you were doing..."

' Stinky ' Bum : "How does it look like I'm doing asshole?"

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "You know there's a way out. A way out of the pain and suffering you feel. A way to calm the hunger."

' Stinky ' Bum : "You're one of those holy rollers aren't ya? Just give me the damn sandwich and go away."

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "Holy roller? Sandwich? No... I'm the real thing. I can show you the way or you can continue suffering."

' Stinky ' Bum : "Just leave me alone!"

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "Have it your way... But remember, I tried to help..."

- Current Scene - Shaggy and J walk up as Jeff leaves. Shaggy has a supersoaker. Ha begins to spray the man. The man begins to freak out. J pulls a zippo from his pocket and lights it. He tosses the zippo at the feet of the man where a pool of the liquid that came from the supersoaker has formed. It instantly flames up and spreads to the man. The man is screaming as J and Shaggy walk off. The video pans to Jeff. You can see Shaggy and J walking up behind him and in the distant background you see the man flailing his arms and hear the faint screams of agony.

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "It's that simple Tommy Dreamer. It's time for some changes in the human race and it starts here in Championship Wrestling Entertainment. One by one I'll make you all see things my way or see no more. You will embrace the power or you will fall before it! The time draws near for Tommy Dreamer to make his decision. Change is inevitable and the changes will come fast."

' Stanky Twickle Puss ' Shaggy 2 Dope :
"Tommy Dreamer I got somethin' for ya hangin next to mah nuts
Getcha mind out tha gutter fool, It's sumthin that slices and cuts!
As I raise my rusty axe and you begin to pray
Inside you start to think, I shouldn't have lived this way.
You last hope comes on this Thursday night
When Jeff gives you the chance to be saved or stay and fight. "

' Mr. Rotten Treats ' Violent J :
"I hope you choose to stay cause I don't like your sorry ass,
Break a faygo bottle and cut ya with the glass.
Make this easy on yourself and take right way out.
Or stay and see what we'll do tah make the people shout! "

' The Immortal ' Jeff Hardy : "Dreamer, you think showing me x-rays of broken bones is going to impress me? Your physical pain concerns me not. It's the spiritual pain I'm after. When you are as I am now broken bones are nothing. When you become what I am you will nie think about pain as a strategy. When you see the light you'll suffer no more...
...You think you being in ECW will frighten me? Where I've been makes ECW look as it was... Pathetic and lowly! Where I've come from is the only place worth mentioning. And where you'll soon venture is the only place you need worry about...
...Well Tommy, as you've seen tonight going against me is not... And I repeat IS NOT! Something you want to do! So Tom, either you let me save you or I'll be foreced to save you from yourself! See ya soon... Thomas... "

- Ending Scene -The camera begins to fade out as Jeff and ICP throw up the 'twin guns'.

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