She’s weird. Okay, she's really weird. Alyssa Mulvahill is definitely an original character, one that does not come along everyday. She's a little crazy but a lot of human. She has a big heart, especially for bunnies. Alyssa comes from the small town of Freckerville somewhere in northern Kansas. When she was a baby, she saw her first bunny and fell in love with it. She kept him as a pet and named him "Mr. Peepers" because he was always staring at her. One day, her bunny was hit but a car going about 20 miles an hour, which is pretty fast for Kansas. The bunny did not survive. Alyssa was devastated and bowed never to let another bunny die like that again. Since then, she has been saving them and has even opened up her own bunny farm.

What you may not know is that Alyssa is actually Tiffany's second cousin, twice removed for her insane personality. They did not really know about each other until college. Alyssa came over to Maryland after her parents told her to get the hell out of state because her bunny obsession is driving them crazy. She met Tiffany in a store and saw her in a bunny top. Granted it was Playboy, she struck conversation and their relation was revealed. Tiffany introduced Alyssa to Pam and a weird friendship was formed. They then introduced her to Devon and the Super Friends was formed. As part of the UPW, Alyssa's job is to scare and annoy. Erm, yeah. She does a great job at that. The fans are now starting to notice her and a Cult Bunny Following is now forming. It's too soon to tell but it looks like Alyssa could be the next big thing.


We first saw him just before Pamela Paulshock's match against Sable. Devon Townsend was introduced to the world as the comic book nerd and a member of the Super Friends but not much is known about him. Devon comes hails from San Diego, California where he attended the University of Southern California. He has a bachelor's degree in Computer Graphics and is looking to get his master's in the same area. When he is not traveling with his friend Pam, he is at home running the official website for View Askew, owned by fellow director Kevin Smith. Devon is not only a comic book nerd but a computer geek as well. He rook many computer classes and now knows how to put together a computer from its parts. He would also like to get into directing and one day wants to direct his own comic book movie.

Devon met Pam at the 2000 ComiCon in Los Angeles, California. It is a large convention where a bunch of nerds get together. They quickly became friends and kept in touch. When Pam wanted reinforcements to come with her to UPW, he was one of the first people she called. His role is to be the mastermind behind many of their crazy operations. He is a very intelligent person and will smite you in anything regarding computers, comic books, and video games. Yes, he likes video games too. It was recently found out that Devon actually had sex with Tiffany Evans. It was a one-time thing and the two are not starting a relationship. He likes her but....not in the permanent girlfriend sense.

Devon Townsend is just a smart, lovable, and sometimes annoying geek. Once you become his friend, you're one for life.


Originally from Baltimore, Maryland, she started her modeling career after winning the "Bikini Open 2" on Pay-Per-View, where viewers across the country voted for their favorite swimsuit contestant. From there she went on to represent "Merry Go Round Boutiques" as the "Desert Storm Girl", signing pictures and traveling to military bases around the country. One of her favorite trips was to the Galapagos Islands to shoot for the Bikini Open calendar!

While in college, she worked weekends at car shows signing posters as Daisy Mae, and shot for calendars around the world. There, she met best friend Tiffany Evans. After graduating from Syracuse University, she moved to Los Angeles and began modeling for Fredricks of Hollywood, Muscle & Fitness, and other clients, while focusing on a career in acting, in both film and television. Since then, she has shot commercials for Snickers, Sprite, Sony, Budweiser, Keystone Beer, Del Taco, Bally's Health & Fitness, and international spots airing in Japan, Europe, Australia, and Mexico.

Pamela made her debut in wrestling as a WCW interviewer. When the federation closed down, she went onto the INDY circuit. Joining the federation wMe, Pamela quickly became one of its top and most loved stars. She won the Women's Championship on Smackdown in 2003. In 2004, she became the General Manager of the Divas Division but that did not last long. The fed closed months later. Out of a job, Pam took a break. She came back in early 2005 as a wrestler for the UPW. She brought along several friends including Tiffany Evans, Devon Townsend, and Alyssa Mulvahill. Now these four friends are reeking havoc and causing trouble backstage. That's just the way we like it.


Tiffany Evans was born in Freeport, New Jersey on January 16th. As a child, she was wild and crazy. Teachers had a difficult time controlling her. Growing up as an only child, Tiffany spent most of her time riding around with the boys and acting goofy. She admitted to losing her virginity at age fifteen. "Yeah..I was young. Really young. Fifteen, actually. But hey, at least he was cute." At age eighteen, Tiffany Evans attended Syracuse University. It was there that she met Pamela Paulshock. The two hit it off and became the best of friends. When they graduated together, Pam went on into wrestling. Tiffany stayed with her, accompanying her on the road.

Tiffany made her debut in the world of professional wrestling the same day as Pamela Paulshock. September. 2003. Smackdown. Pam's opponent? Debra. She stuck by the ringside and cheered her best friend on. Soon, she was roaming backstage flirting with all hot and available men. She is a bonafied slut but don't let the reputation fool you. Befriending Pam and going through what they have gone through, she picked up a few things in the ring. Tiffany became the backstage whore, though she only slept with about 20% the men everyone thinks she has been with. The fans fell in love with her outrageous personality and the crazy things she says. Tiffany, without wrestling, became a real superstar. She also had an obsession with Chris Jericho. Practically stalking him, she was able to sleep with him, which led to a match against Trish Stratus. Unfortunately she lost but her dream of sharing a bed with Jericho came true.

After the wMe closed, Pam and Tiffany went to the UPW where their careers picked up again. Now famously known as everyone's favorite slut, Tiffany Evans is living great with her best friend by her side.

Pamela Paulshock's Second Chance

It's Pamela Paulshock's second chance! Pamela Paulshock has another shot at UPW gold. She defeated Trish Stratus at Lights Out to become the number one contendor for the Women's Title. Now, this week, she gets her shot to go for the gold. It is well known that Trish is cocky and believes that she will win. This arrogance pisses Paulshock off. Looks like we'll have to make her eat her words. Anyway, this week, The Super Friends have united to train Pamela for her match against Trish. Knowing them, it's not normal training. Can she survive?


Scene One-Training...

The sound of leather gloves pounding into a hard leather punching bag bring us into the scene. We are just about a day and a half away from what could be the crowning of a new champion. Pamela Paulshock has finally gotten another shot at the Women's Championship, one that will not be wasted. She will face Trish Stratus once again. One can remember that she defeated the Blonde Bombshell two weeks ago at Lights Out. This week, could we see the same result? Anyway, Pamela's arms move back and forth as she beats away at the punching bag. Her friends are right alongside her, cheering her on. 

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
Come on, Pam! Harder! HARDER!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
And faster! 

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
You can do eeeet! You can do it allllll niiiiiiiight loooooong!

Pamela stops and stares at her friends. Tiffany is making motion with her fingers that cannot and should not be said out loud. Alyssa Mullvahill is chomping away at her already bitten fingernails. Devon is sort of jumping around. He looks almost deranged.  

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Dudes! You act like I'm screwing this piece of leather and cotton and....and...whatever the rest of it is made of!

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
We're just trying to help you train for your match. You're fighting Trish Stratus for the Championships! It's, like, HUUUGE!

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Ginormous, I know. But do I really need to listen to you guys give me the same orders as freakin' Ron Jeremy? I mean, come on guys, this isn't a porno!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
It could be. 

Pamela smacks Alyssa in the back of the head. 

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Oww.... 

She rubs her head and steps two feet away from Pam. She stares at her like she just got kicked for stealing bread. 

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
We're sorry. Look, why don't you put the gloves down and get into the ring?

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Who am I gonna fight? Tiffany's too busy fingering herself, Alyssa would totally bite her nails and break into song before throwing a punch, and you couldn't even land a punch on a comatose horse laying face down in the middle of an abandoned street way.

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Huh? Never mind. Just get into the ring and you'll have a worthy opponent in about.....five seconds.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Fine.....but you better be right.

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Yeah yeah, get in the ring!

Pamela Paulshock reluctantly climbs into the ring. She stares down Devon, tapping her foot impatiently. Devon motions fie seconds with his hands and disappears for a few moments.

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
While we're waiting...how about a song song be m- 

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
NO!

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
NO!

Alyssa hangs her head.

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Fine.... 

Seconds later, Devon Townsend comes waltzing through the door. He blocks the entire entranceway so that you cannot see through him. Pamela stands in the ring, confused. Tiffany is slightly intrigued but more interested in having sex with Devon again. She drifts off into a very graphic flashback. Alyssa is sitting in a corner, singing to herself.

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
The sun will come out...tomorrow.... 

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Ahem! I present to you, Pamela Paulshock, a very worthy opponent. Everyone knows that Spiderman is perhaps the greatest comic book character of all time. Unfortunately, we couldn't afford the costume so we went with the next best thing.

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
Who?

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Superman is the man of steel! He is faster than a speeding bullet! 

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Holy shit, I'm fighting Superman?!

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
No! It seems that the guy playing him found his very own Lois Lane in which he decided to reenact the theory "faster than a speeding bullet". So we went with the next best thing. 

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
Batman?

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
No. 

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Iceman?

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
No!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
The Green Goblin? 

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Definitely no. Through an intensive search, we have found a worthy opponent who not only matches the same exact in-ring skills of Trish Stratus, but who we can also afford. I give you....THE MIGHTY MIDGET!

Pamela's jaw drops.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
You've gotta be kidding me.

Cheesy Superman music plays as a midget walks from behind the curtains. He is dressed in a black mask with a white target like the character "Bull's-eye" from Daredevil. His tight spandex is decorated with red, black and blue, resembling Spiderman only the lines are squiggly and badly done. Pamela rolls her eyes as he makes his way into the wrestling ring. Unable to climb in himself, Devon brings in a two step ladder. When that doesn't work, he simply hoists the dwarf into the ring. Alyssa Mulvahill has somehow found her way in the ring as well where she will act as an announcer.

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Laaaaaaaaadies and Geeeeeeeeeentlemen! Booooooooooooooooooooys and giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirls! Little people and- 

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
All right! We get the point!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Making his way to the ring weighing......uh....weighing.....err twenty-five pounds? The uh...the....the.....

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
MIGHTY MIDGET!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Oh! The Miiiiiiighty Midget!

Pamela shakes her head. The midget gets into the ring with Pamela and immediately starts throwing air punches. Pam snorts and looks ridiculously at Devon who just gives her a thumbs up. The bell rings and the two circle each other.

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
Come on, Pam!

Pamela's Thoughts: This is way too easy. 

Pamela goes to kick up and the midget does a Matrix bend, dodging her foot. Using his quick reflexes, he kicks Pam in the shin. 

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
OW!

Pamela's Thoughts: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!

She grabs her foot in pain. Devon pounds on the mat. 

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Come on Pam! You can take him! You beat Trish Stratus!

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Yeah well she had collegian lips that slowed her down. This midget is freaking fast!

Just as she gets that last sentence out, the midget kick her in the back of the leg. She falls to one knee, grabbing her hurt leg. 

Pamela's Thoughts: Oh my god, I'm getting my ass kicked by a midget. Totally uncool. Get it together, chaquita!

The midget goes to kick her again. This time, Pam just sticks her hand out. The midget runs right into and falls to the floor, unconscious. She pins him with one foot. 1.....2...3!

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
Kick ass, dude.

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Yeah, that was a great warm up. Here's your real opponent.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
What?

Before she can say another word, some corny wannabe hard music plays. A big, bulky, muscular guy comes walking through the door. Pamela's jaw drops and her eyes become the size of saucers.

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Making his way to the ring weighing 578 pounds.......GINORMO MAN! 

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
He's......huge. I wonder what he's like in bed.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Tiffany! So not the time right now! 

The huge man steps into the ring and stares down Pamela. She unconsciously shakes in fear.

Pamela's Thoughts: Holy Christopher Anne Heche! I have to face this cross between HHH and and Trish Stratus on horse steroids. I am so screwed!

The bell rings and the man immediately charges at Pam. Pam sidesteps him and he goes crashing into the ring post. He grabs his shoulder in pain. She grins.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
All right!

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Pam look out!

She turns around and finds her face smashing directly into a hard fist. She grabs her nose in pain.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Oww! Crap!

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Come on! You can do it!

The man picks Pam up and slams her down. He then elbow drops her. She grabs her chest in pain. The man grabs her by the head, punches her, and gives her a neck breaker.

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Come on! If the Athenians can beat the Spartans, than you sure as hell can beat this genetic freak!

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Well, then, give me ten thousand ancient soldiers and I'll have this dude down in five seconds!

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
*To self* I've got an idea...*out loud* Hey Ginormo!

The man turns around. Tiffany flashes him. He rubs his chin and smiles. Pam uses this opportunity to give him a low blow. He keels over and she rolls him up. 1....2...3! 

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Take that Trish Stratus!

::Slutty Sidekick::-Tiffany Evans::
You are so gonna kick her ass tomorrow!

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Hell yeah!

They slap each other high fives.

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
Good work, Paulshock. You've made me proud.

::More than just electrifying::-Pamela Paulshock::
Oh stop with the weird commando talk. Let's just get the Hades out of here. Ginormo Guy is really starting to freak me out.

They look over at the wrestler who is still grabbing his groin.

::Comic Book Nerd::-Devon Townsend::
You're right. Let's go. Come on Alyssa!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed::-Alyssa Mulvahill::
Coming! 

The Four Super friends exit the building through the door. The male wrestler is still still in the ring, holding his crotch. He rocks back and forth, groaning. The scene fades.

Scene Two-Interview

The scene opens up backstage at a UPW Arena.  Thousands of fans have gathered. it is the night before X-Fire and excitement is in the air. Pamela Paulshock is going to face Trish Stratus for the Women's Championship. Speaking of which, she is standing in front of the camera at this very moment. She is clad in a Celtic's jersey with a white hat. He has a huge chain around her neck and baggy jean shorts that go past her knees. Tiffany Evans is standing next to her with lip prosthetics and a Canadian flag in her hand. They both have microphones.

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Yo yo yo! The Champ is here!

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Along with his busty lipped whore, Trish Stratus!

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Yo, dis be John Cena. Yo, I'm here backstage at the arena, yo.

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
We're here to interview some people backstage!

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
But first. lemme introduce ya'll to da chain gang, yo! First up is MC Bunnies Fo Free!

"Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice plays in the background. Alyssa Mulvahill walks out wearing fifty gold chains and rings. She has on a wet wig to resemble a greasy afro. She also has on very baggy pants that make it difficult to walk. 

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed Chain Gang Member::-Alyssa Mulvahill is MC Bunnies Fo Free::
Yo yo yo yo! MC Bunnies Fo Free in da hooooooooooooooouse! 

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Erm...right. Our next Chain Gang member is a white boy straight from  suburbs like me...Yo, it's my dawg Docta Doom!

Some crappy wannabe rap song plays in the background. Devon Townsend walks out, clad in a black beanie, gold teeth, gold chains, a football jersey, and his ass hanging out of really baggy jeans. He struggles to walk towards the two.

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
Yo!

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Wussup!

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Hey guys! I'm from Canada, eh! I'm a canuck!

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed Chain Gang Member::-Alyssa Mulvahill is MC Bunnies Fo Free::
What's a canuck? Do you buck? Do you chuck? Does it suck that your lips could have saved everyone on the Titanic?

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
You're not supposed to talk aboot that, eh?

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed Chain Gang Member::-Alyssa Mulvahill is MC Bunnies Fo Free::
SHHHHHH! Someone's coming!

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Who?

Just then, Torrie Wilson approaches them. She walks up to the gang and stares them up and down. 

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
What's going on here?

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo!

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
You mind if we ask you a few questions?

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
Oh, no. Not at all. 

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Great! First of all, what do you think aboot me new lips, eh?

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
Huh? What? 

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
What do you think aboot me new lips, eh?

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
I'm sorry. I can't understand you. 

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Yo, what Busty over here is tryin' ta say is what do you think of her new lips?

Trish smiles and Torrie Wilson looks shocked. Her lips are so big that when she smiles, it covers up her chin. Wow. 

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
Whoa! Those are.......enormous! 

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Thanks!

She giggles. 

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed Chain Gang Member::-Alyssa Mulvahill is MC Bunnies Fo Free::
Looks like a raft to me!

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
More like the iceberg that actually sank the Titanic!

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Yo, dats mad harsh, yo. So, Torrie, do you think I'm a punkass bitch?

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
Uh excuse me?

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
You think I'm a punkass bitch?

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
I don't even know what that is. 

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Basically, a whimp. I love whimps. I once dated Christian and he's the biggest wuss I've ever seen. He uses ass cream and even cried when we watched The Notebook. It's his favorite movie, I swear. But that's a different story, eh?

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
Huh? 

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
I said- you know what? Nevermind!

::Playboy Goddess::-Torrie Wilson::
Riiight. I think I have....somewhere to be. 

Torrie slowly backs away. She then quickly disappears, very confused. Pam, Tiff, Devon, and Alyssa all look at each other. 

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
What was that all about?

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
No friggen idea. 

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Whatever. I'm dressed up as John Cena and I'm just standing here like an idiot.

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed Chain Gang Member::-Alyssa Mulvahill is MC Bunnies Fo Free::
You could rap!

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
NO!

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
NO! 

::Crazy & Bunny Obsessed Chain Gang Member::-Alyssa Mulvahill is MC Bunnies Fo Free::
Just a suggestion.

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
No she's got a point. John Cena thinks he's so great because he can make two sentences rhyme. Wooooow! I can do that too! Anyone with a thesaurus can! Watch me...

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Oh god..

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
Here we go....

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
Yo yo...

X treme X fire is just a day away

And I hear what everybody has to say

Pamela Paulshock is gonna lose to Trish Stratus

Those idiots haven't even checked my UPW status

I'm not a stupid bimbo who's just here to wave and smile

I'm a championship contender and I'm gonna be here for a while

Trish Stratus is just an huge ego and not much more

Except a wanna be  but never could be John Cena whore

What you should be doing Trish is worrying about our match tomorrow

Because soon you're gonna find yourself crying in sorrow

The match hasn't begun and already you think you're gonna win it

I've got news for you Trish. You're not that great and you're full of s**t.

This match is for the championship and soon you'll see

That not all fairytales are gonna end happily 

This is reality, there are no ifs, ands, or buts about it

Trish Stratus is gonna win? I highly doubt it.

So you can say all that you wanna say about me

At the end of the day, you can't hear, see or touch me!

::Comic Book Nerd and Chain Gang Member::-Devon Townsend is Docta Doom::
I think that was the lamest thing I've ever heard. 

::Busty Lips::-Tiffany Evans as Trish Stratus::
Wow...

::Wigger with a Crappy Haircut::-Pamela Paulshock as John Cena::
I can do better! Watch me!

Yo yo.

I've been hearin' this stupid bitch talkin' all this crap about me

Like how she's gonna kick my ass but what Trish fails to see

Is that I'm not one of the whores that she's used to fighting

I'm a monster. When people see me they report a demon sighting

When I get her in that ring I'm gonna make sure that she's - ah screw it!

All week long I've been hearing the same stupid thing over and over and over again. It's really starting to get on my nerves. Trish Stratus is the best diva this federation has to offer. Trish Stratus is going to defeat Pamela Paulshock to retain her Women's Champion. What does everyone see in Trish? Why are so many people afraid of her? She isn't that great. They talk about her reign in the WWE. Well, let's talk about it. She first entered as nothing but a whore. She flashed her breasts, wore those hideous trench coats and had sex with Vice McMahon. Then she injured her foot and was out for several months. When she came back, she picked up a couple of moves. Big deal. The broad learns how to wrestle and all of a sudden she's the Messiah of the divas division. She trained to fight a little, she didn't cure cancer. SO what if she was a six time women's champion. Do you know what that means? That she lost it five other times! Stop putting Trish Stratus on  a pedestal because she is not that great! She's not even above average. What can she do? A couple of chick kicks and sloppy punches. So what? Is it because of the way she looks? Don't even get me started. The women looks like she's been injecting her lips with so much collegian it's starting to give her a speech impediment. We already don't know what the hell she's saying because she's Canadian. Now she wants to make it harder by getting herself a couple of rafts for lips. Her face is frozen in time. She's become a Greek statue. Who the hell likes the Greeks anyway? All they did was create a bunch of fairytales about how the world may or may not have been created and created a bunch of statues of ugly men with small penises. Is that something to be proud of? She's a Greek and a Canadian. A double fault. Greece is the home of homosexuals. Canada...hell, it's becoming the land of homosexuals. Greece is full of ugly guys with small penises, stupid accents, and are more interested in other boys. Canada is full of spineless whimps with stupid accents, ugly guys, and probably men with small penises. I don't really know. I guess I'll have to look at one of their statues but then again, I'd rather wipe Sadam Hussein's ass than to step foot in Canada ever again. Trish..Trish Trish..There is not a thing that is great or special about you. The way you wrestle..the way you looks. You're a dime a dozen. That little ego of yours is way too big for a girl who makes Fat Betsey who sits on her ass eating Bob Bons all day while watching Oprah, seem like the most interesting woman in the world. You're the greatest? You're a Greek goddess? That is a lie! That is nothing but a joke! You can't even get John Cena to notice you without stripping naked, sprawled across the bed with your legs wide open. Who can blame him? Everybody's had you. Vince McMahon. Shane McMahon. Stephanie McMahon.. hell that guy in the front row somewhere out in that arena. Half of the Toronto Maple Leafs. Don't forget the entire Pro Football League. Oh, then there's the old guy with the gimpy leg. You're like a free bus! Everyone gets a ride! You've got more mileage on you than every Fed Ex vehicle traveling throughout the country combined. EVERYONE HAS HAD YOU TRISH! You're old news, damaged goods. I think it's time to put your fish away because it's spoiled and starting to release a stench that's killing half the roster. Put it away I beg of you! Put it away before you start another Holocaust with that smelly crevice between your legs! Should I now call you Hitler? Sheesh. Twit. Why would you go after John Cena anyway? He's the ugliest superstar to ever grace the UPW arena. He makes Gary Busey look like Brad Pitt! What's your obsession with this douche bag? He thinks he's black and that he has street credibility. HE GREW UP IN WESTBURY, MASSACHUSETTS! In a two story home with a white picket fence! This idiot is nothing but a fake! His raps aren't even real raps! They're just him rambling on about a bunch of nonsense. Any woman who falls for his crap should be thrown in jail for incredible stupidity. So, I guess that means there must me a warrant out for your arrest, Trish. Jesus. And this is the woman that is allegedly better than me? This is the women that is our World Champion, representing the best of the diva's division? There is something completely wrong with that. Trish doesn't even deserve that title. She has brought nothing but shame to the belt. Her reign has been nothing but the flaunting of an egotistical bimbo with the abilities of Terry Shivo! Well, tomorrow night, I'm going to end that reign. Soon, the world will see a real champion hold that belt. Trish, it's over for you. You're done. Finished. It's time for a real woman to hold that belt and you can sure as hell believe that it's going to me. Too long have you held that belt. Too long has there been no rain on your little parade. Trish Stratus, tomorrow night on X Fire, I'm gonna knock your lights out....one more time.

Pamela stares at the camera. It fades to black.

Stats-Roleplay Information

[W/D/L]-Singles
07-01-02

[W/D/L]-Tag Team
04-00-00

Role-play #: 25
Next Match: Pamela Paulshock versus Trish Stratus
Stip: Women's Championship on the Line
Event: X Treme X Fire
Mentioned:Trish Stratus, John Cena
Used: Pamela Paulshock, others

Stats-Paulshock Information

Name: Pamela Paulshock
Hometown: Baltimore, Maryland
Height: 5'6
Weight: 130lbs
Finisher:Shock Therapy (torando ddt)
Theme Music: "Love In An Elevator" by Aerosmith
Best Friends: Tiffany Evans, Alyssa Mulvahill, Devon Townsend
Allies: None
Enemies: None
Alignment: Face
Accomplishments: former IC Champion, Roleplayer of the Week(3x's), Quote of the Week(2x's), Miss UPW, Story of the Week

Electrifyingly Shocked

Beulah, Stephanie McMahon, Gail Kim, Sable, Joy Giovanni, Kim Page(2x's), Carmella, Daffney, Debra, Tracie Wright, Lita, Desire, Bubba Ray Dudley, Trish Stratus

Stats-Disclaimer

This role-play was written by me, Keisha. No part of this role-play may be reproduced, used, or copied without my permission. Much effort was put into this and it is not to be degraded by a lazy punk who does not know how to get his or her own stuff. I made this role-play and graphics. Don't steal. I am not Pamela Paulshock. I do not know her nor am I affiliated with her. I have no connections to her. In closing, I would like to say one last thing. DON'T STEAL MY SHIZNIT! If you want something from this, contact me on AIM (xxHurrixBloomxx). Thank you for listening.