[updated 8/27/2002]

Artist - Blackalicious "Make You Feel That Way"

Countdown

Labor day is around the corner and I can`t wait to bump into it and crush it with nonstop enjoyment. What a difference a day makes. A day off on a Monday is like finding that little toy at the bottom of a Cracker Jack box. Avoiding work on a Monday is one of life`s best pleasures.
Monday: Don`t you love me?
Me: Get away from me bi`tch.
Monday: Wait come back, don`t go!
Me: See ya later, wouldn`t want to be ya.

A couple of friends visiting from out of town will only serve to enhance what promises to be a wild and whooly weekend. The Fab Five`s NYC connection, Kimchee, will be making her presence felt as she tries to out drink each and everyone of us. Last time we hung out with her, kouhe couldn`t hold his liquor and he ended up making love to the porcelain goddess. Maybe we`ll get a repeat performance when we see her again this time around.

My friend Kat from LA has come up to the Bay to visit for a week. This will be the first time she`s going to meet everyone in the Fab Five. I hope she likes geeks. If not, I plan to sway her opinion by refilling her drink every 5 minutes at the clubs. By the end of the night she won`t even care who the hell we are.

And no, that`s not what I do when I try to pick up on women... although it`s not such a bad idea, huh.

[updated 8/26/2002]

Artist - Our Lady of Peace "Somewhere Out There"

Skimming

In a reflective mood tonight.

What is pure? The struggle. The happenstance’s of life`s little curveballs define who we are. Without them we would be lost to the ilk of ignorance and lethargy. Sometimes when I’m truly working, I can’t help but grin because I feel that I’m making progress towards something greater. Often times we complain about trudging through a meaningless task, but it’s a different feeling altogether when all your effort is behind an end goal. It grants satisfaction.

So raise your glass, say "cheers" to all the grinders of this world.

My weekend was spent in a computer lab trying to code up a hardware verification program. Not terribly exciting but the juices were flowing as I was making progress, no matter that the victories were only small little skirmishes. Sometimes the greatest triumphs are moral ones.

[updated 8/20/2002]

Artist - Coldplay "In My Place"

Stranger than Fiction

Today is the day. Run, don`t walk to your nearest media store and pick up the recently released collector`s edition DVD of Pulp Fiction.

"Whether or not what we experienced was an According to Hoyle miracle is irrelevant. What is relevant is that I felt the touch of God. God got involved."

I first saw this flick in 1994 without much expectation. As I watched in the theatre however, a smile spread across my face because I knew I was watching greatness at work.

"Say "what" again. SAY "WHAT" AGAIN! I dare you, I double dare you, motherf-cker! Say "what" one more goddamn time!"

Tarantino`s a f-cking genius. His dialogue can`t be beat. I wonder how he came up with all this good sh-t. Maybe he was sitting on the toilet when all these good ideas came to him. I wish that could happen to me. The only thing I think of when I`m in the john is how big a piece of sh-t I can crap out. I think the longest I ever got was 1.5 feet. Yeah, I measured it.

"The way your dad looked at it, this watch was your birthright. He`d be damned if any of the slopes were gonna get their greasy yellow hands on his boy`s birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something: his a$$. Five long years, he wore this watch up his a$$. Then when he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable piece of metal up my a$$ for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you."

Such dedication can`t be said of everyone. Can you imagine having a watch stuck up your a$$ for two years? Imagine what that felt like. Damn, lucky guy...

" There`s a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother`s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin` that sh-t for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your a$$. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherf-cker before you popped a cap in his a$$. But I saw some sh-t this mornin` made me think twice. Now I`m thinkin`: it could mean you`re the evil man. And I`m the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here, he`s the shepherd protecting my righteous a$$ in the valley of darkness. Or it could be you`re the righteous man and I`m the shepherd and it`s the world that`s evil and selfish. I`d like that. But that sh-t ain`t the truth. The truth is you`re the weak. And I`m the tyranny of evil men. But I`m tryin`, Ringo. I`m tryin` real hard to be a shepherd."

Sometimes I think I too am an avenging angel, bringing enlightenment to all the ignorant fools of this world. But perhaps I`m wrong. Maybe I`m one of the selfish men who needs to beshepherded towards the way of the light. No one ever said it would be easy to do the right thing. We owe it to ourselves to try though. Trying is half the battle. Do me a favor and try real hard to rewatch Pulp Fiction someday, some night when you don`t feel like having fun with yourself.

"Normally, both of you would be dead as f-cking fried chicken by now, but since I`m in a transitional period, I don`t want to kill either one of your a$$es"

Hey I`m in a transitional period as well. You know what I do when I`m lost and confused about life? I take one hand and... start rubbing my tummy like buddha. That always puts a smile on my face. A peanut butter and jelly sandwich (one of the world`s greatest inventions) helps too... hmmmm, peanut butter & jelly...

[updated 8/11/2002]

Artist - Elvis vs Jxl "A Litte Less Conversation"

Everything AND the Kitchen Sink

I’m in love with hard wood floors and ceramic tiles. The credit card I use allows me to stack up bonus points for freebee magazines. I’ve already got ESPN, Sports Illustrated, Electronic Gaming Monthly,various car subscriptions, almost everything you can ask for. Unfortunately, not Maxim but I would if I could. Rather than let my bonus point go to waste I decided to get Better Homes and Gardens. Ahem, yeah you heard me. It’s not often you get to “bring flavor to your home” and “cozy up your nest”. As I’m flipping through it I’m getting some really cool ideas on how I want my future home to be. Seriously, now I know why women read this. Why not bring Bali to the backyard? Watch the clouds drift by from your bamboo lounge chair. Have a row of tiki torches light the way to your garden paradise. Dress up plain nusery pots with baskets. Okay, forget the damn baskets, but the lounge chair stays.

The weekend was mighty satisfying. Um yeah. How did you know alcohol was involved? Can’t get anything past you. Damn, you knowme too well already. I’m gonna have to break off this relationship. There was a beer festival in Mountain View, and where there’s beer my nose will follow. 20 bucks gets you a beer glass and 8 tokens. With these tokens you can sample the various beer vendors on display, over 30 in all. They had a wide range of pale ales, pilsners, ambers, darks, lights. Hell, they even had raspberry flavored beer. Other flavors included pear, peach, grape, and apple. There was beer made from oatmeal, barley, wheat, and some guy’s spit. I cried when they ran out of the spit one. 8 tokens seemed to fly by pretty quick or maybe it just felt like that ‘cause TIME HAD STOOD STILL!! Extra tokens were only a buck apiece so of course I had to get myself a handful more. I lost track of how many beers I drank after 12… I forgot how to count by then. This all occurred within a four hour period, or at least that’s what my friends say. All I remember is crashing at Canadian Bacon’s (kouhe’s girlfriend) place and taking an extra strawberry tequila shot. Women and their fruity alcohol drinks, go figure. Anyways, point is that it tasted like milk, with no resemblance to any sort of tequila I’d ever taken. Until 10 minutes later of course. Oooh, the spinning. I can count all the dots on the ceiling at once. Quick, take me to Vegas and put me in front a blackjack table. I swear I become an idiot savant, minus the savant when I`m drunk.

I woke up with dry cotton mouth. I hate that dehydrated feeling after drinking, don’t you? I thanked God that I was in my own bed, and without any tattoos that said “Enter Here” on my a$$.

So that was my weekend. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to go rearrange some furniture and bring life to my room by installing some contemporary mini-blinds.

[updated 8/7/2002]

Artist - Diana Fox "Running On Empty"

The X-roads

The monotony of everyday life is starting to take its toll. As such, it`s taken me away from my beloved journal entriesand I no longer come to update that often. If I do go on AA it`s to read other peoples` pages. I find their lives much more interesting than mine at the moment. Sad isn`t it that I`m forced to live vicariously through strangers on AA. Yes, dripping sarcasm is my strong suit.

Last night was kouhe`s birthday so my friends and I met up with him for eats and drinks. We spent the latter part of the evening at D&Bs downing shots left and right. Liquid Cocaine, Three Wise Men, End of the World. It`s interesting how they come up with names for potent alcoholic beverages. I don`t know whether it`s to scare people away from drinking, or to provide ample warning for what`s to come if you do drink. I don`t normally pound the bottle during a work week and now I know why. After shooting myself with an End of the World (151, goldslagger, mixed with whisky), it sure felt like my world was going to end. I somehow was able to get home, stumble into bed, and pass out. I don`t remember taking my clothes off so I`m a bit worried there. But damn, the dreams I had were simply wonderful. The only downside was waking up to the shriek of my alarm radio, prompting me to curse its existence. Sluggish would be a good word to describe how I felt all day today. For the life of me I couldn`t motivate myself to give a f-ck about my job. Not that I do anyways, but at least I try to be accomodating.

So here I am, typing this and watching American Beauty on dvd. It`s fitting that I watch this movie because I`ve been thinking about how my life has turned out thus far, and it`s led me to think about its future. Do I want to continue down this path, and risk wishing that I had gone in a different direction 20 years from now? Perhaps I`m worried about nothing but I can`t help wondering what I truly want to do. I don`t love my job, yet I don`t hate it either. It pays the bills and keeps me off

[updated 7/30/2002]

Artist - A-Ha "Solace"

M.I.A.

Where have I been? I`d like to say I was abducted by aliens and taken to a more technically advanced society. Alas, I`m stuck here on this planet slaving away like a drone in the day to day working world. More often than not I work straight through lunch and it`s quite awhile before I get to smell the fresh air of the outside world. I guess this is payback for all the times I`ve slacked off. Payback`s a bi`tch.

It`s amazing how precious every free minute is now. The time I most cherish is the two hours before I put my head down to sleep each night. Oh, and the 15 minutes I take driving to work is tops in my book too. Is that sad or what?! I`d be an understatement to say it`s been a bit stressful, but one thing does take the edge off. What? Well yeah... porn does help but that`s not what I was gonna say. It`s the music... always been the music... such sweet tunes. I`ve been able to get my grubby lil hands on 40+ more albums and that`s soothing the pounding in my head. Here`s the latest hip-hop mix I`ve been able to compile:

UrbanBeatz 2002 vol IV:

1. Ashanti - "Happy"
2. Amerie - "Why Don`t We Fall In Love"
3. 3LW ft P.Diddy - "I DO" rmx
4. Lady May - "Round Up"
5. Bone Thugs N Harmony - "Get Up and Get Out"
6. Noreaga - "Nothin"
7. Foxy Brown - "Stylin"
8. Scario ft Fat Joe & Angie Martinez - "Live Big"
9. Ja Rule, Ashanti, Vita, Charlie Baltimore - "Down For You"
10. Clipse - "Grinding"
11. Nelly - "Dilemma"
12. JD ft P.Diddy, Snoop - "Welcome to Atlanta" Remix
13. Mario - "Just a Friend"
14. P.Diddy, Ginuwine, Loon - "I Need A Girl" part 2
15. Eve ft Alicia Keys "Gangsta Lovin"
16. B Rich - "Whoa, Now"
17. Alicia Keys - "How Come You Don`t Call Me"
18. Jennifer Lopez - "I`m Gonna Be Alright" Remix
19. Styles - "Good Times"


Of all artists up there I find myself singing to Alicia Keys the most. I don`t know why... I think it`s `cause her voice is so striking, you can`t help but want to join in. Of course I`m a frog compared to that muse but it`s fun nonetheless.

Cussing is such a reliever too... I swear (no pun intended) it`s been awhile since I`ve uttered such nasty words on such a constant basis. Mutha f-cking, bi`tch,a$$, f-cking, son of a shi`t a$$ job. Well, now you know why I cherish those 15 minutes while driving to work. Gotta psyche myself up ya know..

[updated 7/21/2002]

Artist - 4 Strings "Take Me Away"

And then there were four

The fab five has been reduced by one. Well, it had to happen sooner or later and it couldn’t have happened to a geekier… I mean nicer guy. Big ups to kouhe for finding himself a woman. So that’s how it’s done! Next time I’ll remember to club someone over the head and pull her by the hair too. I don’t expect to see much of him anymore ‘cause people tend to lose touch once they get into a relationship. It’s not that they don’t want to hang out with you anymore, it’s because they are getting nookie. And in this circular realm of swinging bachelorhood that’s a non-too recent occurrence. It’s like winning the lottery, going home to Jennifer Love Hewitt, and then watching ESPN while sipping a beer. Hell Yeah!

Now that our ranks have been reduced by one, I thought it would be a good time to open up a casting call for a replacement. Man or woman, if you meet the majority of the following requirements then you too can be one of the mythical but laughable fab five! ARE YOU READY?!!

1. Avid video game player. Shooters, role playing, fighting. It’s all good!
2. Do you understand the rules of Advanced Dungeons and Dragons? If you do then… YOU ARE A FREAK OF NATURE!!!! Get a f-cking life!
3. Drink shots and shots of alcohol. Your favorite drink is the long island ice tea.
4. Go to clubs, stand on the sidelines, not dance, and never hit on anybody.
5. Movie nut. Can you recite the entire benediction of Samuel L Jackson’s character role in Pulp Fiction before he blows someone away? That may be asking too much. Okay, do you watch a ton of movies and have you ever watched Lord of the Rings more than twice?
6. Are you capable of taking apart your computer and upgrading your motherboard?
7. Lovable, huggable person? Never apply here again! Get the hell out of here…now!
8. Insulting, biting, sarcastic humor. Bonus points for being able to cap on somebody with a snappy comeback in less than 2 seconds flat.
9. Open minded. Accepting non-judgmental personality. Just try not to express your opinions around us `cause we just don`t give a shi`t.
10. Enjoy extreme sports: Snowboarding, mountain biking, Sky-diving, motor-biking, jacking off.


And those are the top ten. There are few more criteria but do I really need to list, dorky, geeky, quirky, and f-cked up in the head. If you’ve been reading this journal for awhile, you would have already known that. Waitaminute! If you HAVE been reading this then you are one of us!!! Join us, don’t resist, you know you want to. You will be assimilated sooner or later so why fight it. Come back… don’t click away… damn, lost another one.

In passing I`d like to say CONGRATS to kouhe... we`ll miss having you around. *sniff* I`m gonna pour out liquour for him on the street...

[updated 7/16/2002]

Artist - Groove Armada "My Friend"

Summer Sunday

Of all the times to go out on a weekend I have to do it on a Sun. Did absolutely nada Fri, Sat nite and then Sun comes around. Afternoon, I went out with a friend from my college days that I haven’t seen in 2 years. We chilled at the Stanford mall where I spent entirely too much on overpriced clothing. On University Ave, we had an early dinner at a nice Italian bistro. Angel hair pasta, salmon almondene in a lightly, spiced tomato sauce. That was topped off with conversation at the University café, accompanied with cheesecake and caffeine. With some people you just pick up where you left off even though you haven’t seen them in awhile. That type of easy familiarity is the best, dontcha think?

I’m about to say my goodbyes when my celly rings around 7pm. The fellas want to catch Road to Perdition in an hour. So I take up leave and head on out to the theatres. Twenty minutes later I’m watching the best movie that’s come out this year. Most summer movies don’t carry much emotional weight. This one does and it’s quite heavy.

Through and through this movie details a son’s relationship with his father on so many levels. The acting was superb on all accounts. Paul Newman, Tom Hanks, Jude Law. All the subtleties of film making, conversations, and gestures rolled into a neat package. From the beginning of the film you know what the outcome will be. However, it’s the journey throughout the film that captures one’s satisfaction.

As taken from the www.aintitcoolnews.com:

"This is a film about looking at your parents, seeing them as the flawed human beings that they are, loving them for it, but not repeating their mistakes. It is a film about redemption and revenge. A story about mistakes and corrections. But most of all it is a story a little boy that dreamt his father was the Lone Ranger only to find out he’s the son of Butch Cavandish and that he shouldn’t follow down that path.

There are many awe inspiring scenes. One happens in a diner where Hanks is eating dinner with Jude Law’s character hot on his trail. Watching Jude and Tom sitting there talking about what it is like tobein the presence of the dead, both playing it cool. Both trying not to let on to the other that the other is who the other is, but Hanks realizing that Law knows exactly who he is… Well, this is masterfully played. And watch for a cameo by ‘the best bead of sweat in film history’ in this scene. It is that detail, that amazing excretion that adds so much… so much to the scene."

Hell, parts of the movie made me choke up a bit. That’s a rare occurrence even I’ll admit. If Oscars were handed out today, this movie would get my vote.

After the movie, my friends and I hit Denny’s for some food. It turned out to be a long night of discussion with topics ranging from women, relationships, and the state of the world we live in. By the time it was over my watch read 2am. Why we always have debates at Denny’s beats the hell out of me. The food’s not that great but it’s the only place that stays open 24hrs. I wouldn’t be getting much sleep and I’d be tired the next day, but nights like this bring more than a feeling of camaraderie.

Alas, I’m slacking off on my last vacation journal entry. I’ll finish it eventually so don’t you peeping toms worry. Now quit jackin off to my picture.

[updated 7/16/2002]

Artist - Groove Armada "My Friend"

Summer Sunday

Of all the times to go out on a weekend I have to do it on a Sun. Did absolutely nada Fri, Sat nite and then Sun comes around. Afternoon, I went out with a friend from my college days that I haven’t seen in 2 years. We chilled at the Stanford mall where I spent entirely too much on overpriced clothing. On University Ave, we had an early dinner at a nice Italian bistro. Angel hair pasta, salmon almondene in a lightly, spiced tomato sauce. That was topped off with conversation at the University café, accompanied with cheesecake and caffeine. With some people you just pick up where you left off even though you haven’t seen them in awhile. That type of easy familiarity is the best, dontcha think?

I’m about to say my goodbyes when my celly rings around 7pm. The fellas want to catch Road to Perdition in an hour. So I take up leave and head on out to the theatres. Twenty minutes later I’m watching the best movie that’s come out this year. Most summer movies don’t carry much emotional weight. This one does and it’s quite heavy.

Through and through this movie details a son’s relationship with his father on so many levels. The acting was superb on all accounts. Paul Newman, Tom Hanks, Jude Law. All the subtleties of film making, conversations, and gestures rolled into a neat package. From the beginning of the film you know what the outcome will be. However, it’s the journey throughout the film that captures one’s satisfaction.

As taken from the www.aintitcoolnews.com:

"This is a film about looking at your parents, seeing them as the flawed human beings that they are, loving them for it, but not repeating their mistakes. It is a film about redemption and revenge. A story about mistakes and corrections. But most of all it is a story a little boy that dreamt his father was the Lone Ranger only to find out he’s the son of Butch Cavandish and that he shouldn’t follow down that path.

There are many awe inspiring scenes. One happens in a diner where Hanks is eating dinner with Jude Law’s character hot on his trail. Watching Jude and Tom sitting there talking about what it is like to be in the presence of the dead, both playing it cool. Both trying not to let on to the other that the other is who the other is, but Hanks realizing that Law knows exactly who he is… Well, this is masterfully played. And watch for a cameo by ‘the best bead of sweat in film history’ in this scene. It is that detail, that amazing excretion that adds so much… so much to the scene."

Hell, parts of the movie made me choke up a bit. That’s a rare occurrence even I’ll admit. If Oscars were handed out today, this movie would get my vote.

After the movie, my friends and I hit Denny’s for some food. It turned out to be a long night of discussion with topics ranging from women, relationships, and the state of the world we live in. By the time it was over my watch read 2am. Why we always have debates at Denny’s beats the hell out of me. The food’s not that great but it’s the only place that stays open 24hrs. I wouldn’t be getting much sleep and I’d be tired the next day, but nights like this bring more than a feeling of camaraderie.

Alas, I’m slacking off on my last vacation journal entry. I’ll finish it eventually so don’t you peeping toms worry. Now quit jackin off to my picture.

[updated 7/11/2002]

Artist - Moby "We Are Made of Stars"

Whew! Is is possible for sweat to sweat? It is SO hot out there. 110! What the hell happened? Someone must have left the oven on ‘cause I’m baking like a spring chicken. Doesn’t bother me one bit though. I’m solar powered. I deal better in warm climates, the hotter the better. I hate wind. Cold breezes make me paranoid. Not ‘cause I fear the boogey man but ‘cause I get sick easy . I’m thin skinned, 8% body fat, so any sort of cold weather makes me want to bundle up. Yes, I was a reptile in a previous life.

Vacation Trip, Day 4: Caliente

Man, is this vacation ever going to end! I’m getting tired typing all this shi`t out. Okay, so today we made a run for the border. Surprisingly, the entrance is quite near to San Diego. No more than 20 minutes away. We were driving along and next thing we knew all the signs had Spanish on them. At first I thought we some how got detoured to East LA. But that wasn’t likely ‘cause the streets here were actually cleaner and the people didn’t carry guns. Below is a typical house that can be seen on the streets of Mexico.



Most people tend to take for granted their lot in life. You don’t have to visit slumy places to feel grateful for what you have. But staying in a 2nd world country reminds you of how lucky you truly are. That’s what Mexico is… a 2nd world country. The majority of the housing ranks similar to the ghettos of our poorest neighborhoods. People wandering the streets in search of a hand out are plentiful. Either that orthey try everything possible to earn a decent living by selling you a 10 cent pack of gum. Women have many children there. They figure the more kids they have, the more opportunities they’ll have to sell you something. Children of the ghetto, cry for them, and then buy a pack of gum off em.

The difference between the have and have nots is great. One minute we’re driving by poorly constructed housing and the next we’re checking into a luxurious condo by Rosarito beach. The view is breathtaking.



Appreciate what you have `cause there are alot of people worse off than you. It`s one of the reasons why I can`t stand whiners. People who b.itch all the time have no worldly perspective. They are so self absorbed, they can`t see past themselves. (TANGENT ALERT!) I witnessed one of the worst examples imaginable at a club once. While waiting in line, I saw some ladies try to gain entrance through the guestlist. Unfortunately for them, by the time they got there the guestlist had already closed. They started b.itching to the bouncer about it and eventually left pissed. Oh no! Heaven forbid actually paying to get in a club. To them it was all about the principle of paying. Shi`t, get over yourself. The world doesn’t revolve around your elitist personalities. I don’t care how beautiful you are, that kind of selfishness is plain ugly. That my friends is SCRUB behavior. SCRUB! I swear (and I do that liberally), people like that deserve a bullet to the head.

Off my soapbox. Just to let you know we did not stay in Tiajuana. Instead we stayed in Rosarito, a beach town community 30 minutes south of TJ. Once there, all I wanted to do was chill, take in a Corona, and sample the food. So we did. Authentic hand made salsa & chips, quessadillas, fish tacos, and carne asada, tortilla wrapped burritos. We practicallyordered everything off the menu. Later on, the fan in the bathroom back at the crib had to be left on constantly. And you thought you could escape this article without one bathroom joke... foolish human.

[updated 7/9/2002]

Artist - Aphrodite "Calcutta"

Damn, so tired. I knew coming back to work there’d be tons to do. Yet, I was stupid enough to sign up for a couple field classes that apply to my industry. So on top of the 12 hour days, I gotta go to class in the evenings for a few hours. Meesa Crazy! The problem is that I feel my mind going to waste when it’s not active. Now, my mind is mush from thinking too much. Me… thinking?! Who woulda thought.

Someone said why don’t I post up my entire vacation journal all at once. I would if I could. The thing is I’m writing it as I speak and I don’t have enough hours in the day to actually finish it. Shi`t, something must be wrong with me… I’m actually doing work at work. Foolish me.

Vacation Trip, Day 3: The Venetian Beach



We’re off to Venice. But not the fairytale Venice you’re thinking of. There aren’t any gondolas, houses built on stilts, or young maidens singing from the rooftops here. Not a romantic edifying European locale. Au contraire mon frere. What you’ll see here is a potpourri of humanity at its strangest. An amalgamate of people from all corners of the earth, mostly the dregs and deadbeats of society. Or what I’d like to call, Berkeley dropouts. Out of towners flock to see this bizarre freakshow. Myself being one of them.

More than anything though, the people know they’re weirdos and they take it in stride. In fact they try to pass off their strange behavior by charging you for it. Want to see something bizarre? Get ready to pull out your wallet. An old man starts dancing in the street. Before too long he’s got balls, broken bottles and flamethrowers juggling in the air. For his grand finale he drops his pants and wets himself. Afterwards he asks for a donation from passersby to help contribute to his insane asylum fund.

Want more? Just up the street another strange performance is about to present itself. An unkempt looking bum stands on a stool. Below him is a sea of sharp glass at his feet. He is to jump feet first into the broken glass without coming to harm. Before undertaking such a dangerous stunt, he asks the audience to pay token to his alcoholic habit. Once satisfied, he soars on high and lands painfully on his a$$. *CRUNCH* Amazingly he’s unhurt, but now there`s a hole in his crotch. The crowd applauds.



Everytime I look at the pic above I think about Baywatch babes running through the sand in that exaggerated bouncy way. When I snapped the pic I expected to see one but I saw a whale of a man chasing after his wind blown bag of chips instead. I`m still shivering from that memory. Hold me.



People build strange gardens in Venice. Some dumbass actually tried to extort money from me when I took this pic. He claimed it took him hours to construct it. Judging by his crossed eyes I would tend to believe him. So I rolled a quarter and had him run after it. I was kidding of course but he actually ran after it.

There ARE legitimate businesses on the beach. Painters selling their pictures, bead makers peddling bracelets and necklaces, tatoo/henna parlors, and tarot card readers fortelling the future. Okay tarot card readers are shysters. I got something read once and one of the cards that was flipped over said “I can’t believe you’re paying for this shi`t.” I promptly set fire to the place.

I’ve learned something very valuable through my travels of Venice. Something mindbending and insightful. Now I know where the bearded lady and lizard man spend their time during the off hours.

Day 3 was educational!

[updated 7/7/2002]

Artist - Nelly "Dilemma"

Vacation Trip, Day 2: A Visit to the Past

Westwood

After such a wild first night, it was understandable that we ended up getting up rather late. My watch read 1pm by the time my feet hit the floor. The day after clubbing is usually the recovery day, a time to chill and do something laid back. I suggest revisiting my old haunt in Westwood for lunch. Back during my Ucla days I used to go to Westwood a lot because I didn’t have car back then and it was the closest place in walking distance. They’ve done a little remodeling to the surrounding area since then but for the most part it’s stayed the same. There’s still the Coffee Bean on Gailey, Tommy Burger next to the gas station, and Mann movie theatres playing the latest releases. There’s a lil known sandwich place next to Tommy Burger that serve up 12inch subs the old fashioned way. Handmade, on cheap french bread, with plenty of fixings. I’m sure the only people who know about the place are the students themselves. It’s so lil known that I forget the name of the place. I just know that it’s next to Tommy Burger. Anyways, if any of you are in town, go check it out. The sandwiches there are the shi`t! That means good for all you white bread dorks out there.

We sit outside, eat our sandwiches and take in the scene. The weather is balmy in the mid 70s. The air actually smells pretty good for LA air. Somebody must have lit a cigarette and burned off all that smog. Although a college town, Westwood caters to visitors as well. There are niche stores lying about that are good for the casual passerby to peep into. Of course there a few bars and clubs scattered about but for the most part I’d say Westwood is the perfect place to lounge about on a sunny Sunday afternoon. Especially after clubbing in the wee hours of the morning. If it was up to me, I’d sit here all the time, sipping a cup of java, watching all the beautiful people walk by, sunning myself below the cloudless deep blue sky.

Il Fornaio: Dinner Among Friends



If Westwood was a place of my past, then dinner would be a reunion with people from it. I’d be meeting up with Jeffro, my good buddy from my college days who always copied my homework. The funny thing was that everytime he copied my homework, he’d end up getting a higher score on it. Fu`cking conspiracy if you ask me. Besides that, Jeffro’s a good guy. He and I click on a fundamental level… we both have a hard time getting a date on Sat night. Basically it’s a bond born out of pathetic circumstances. Sad huh? Yeah, I think so too.

That’s not why I’m excited by this dinner though. I’m going to be meeting Kat, my best female friend. Sorry Jeffro, you`re cool and all but you just don`t do it for me... haha. Kat’s one of those rare birds who’s sexy, smart, beautiful and holds a composure of such dignity and grace that’s hard to describe. Anyways, we only get to hang out a few times a year but each time we do, good times are guaranteed to be had. Tonight would be no different.

I ask Jeffro about a good Italian restaurant and he suggests Il Fornaio, a place nestled between Ocean and Colorado right by the Santa Monica Beach.It’s a great place. (Yo, I’m giving you props Jeffro!) It’s quaint in a family style way but it’s romantic enough to bring a date. But that’s not what I’m here for. Tonight would be a dinner among friends. A dinner between myself, TnT, Superman, Kat, Kat’s friend S'ter, and Jeffro.

We get to Il Fornaio ten minutes early because I hate being late and having women wait for me. When Kat and her friend show up, I stand frozen for a second. Although usually beautiful, tonight Kat was a number one stunna. She shows up in a tight form fitting dress but that’s not what gets me. Her hairstyle has changed completely. Her hair has been braided and the look totally reminds me of Alica Keys. Picture Alicia Keys. Now picture an Asian version of her. That look just kills me, KILLS ME.

I jump out of my frozen moment and quickly give Kat a hug. We exchange pleasantries and introduce everyone in our group. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect dinner. The food was tasty, the wine complimentary, and the conversation free flowing and natural. Hell, even the waiter was on the ball. It was good catching up with Kat again. We spoke of our lives, our most recent happenings, our highs, our lows, and our plans for the immediate future. I talked to her friend S'ter a bit, but not long enough get a clear picture. She seemed like a cool person though, somebody I’d definitely wouldn’t mind getting to know better. S'ter has a laid back personality which reminds me of me.

After dinner, we moved our gathering to the World Café. It’s a lounge a couple miles south of Santa Monica Beach. Here our conversation steered more toward relationships and the qualities we look for in people we want to be with. Kat responded with balance. Similar interests are a given, but someone who balances outyour personality is equally important. It’s not the opposites attract scenario. It’s more about somebody who can keep you grounded and complement your qualities in a mutual beneficial way. Kind of like how an outgoing personality is balanced by a more laid back one. Garrulous talk balanced by focused listening and commentary.

Kat’s a strong out going personality. I’m… well, we know that part already don’t we.

The day ended at the lounge. I hope to see Kat, Jeffro, and S'ter again someday… soon. Day 2 was even better than Day 1.

[updated 7/6/2002]

Artist - Paul Oakenfold "Ready, Steady, Go"

I’m back. Bet you missed me, huh. Admit it! Okay, don’t all of you give me a hug at once. The line forms at the door.

It’s good to finally come home again. I love going on vacations and all but I like sleeping in my own bed too. The paradox of the vacation lies in the fact that you’re trying to get away to relax but in the end you’re so tired of having fun you just want to go home and crash. Alas, that’s the price you pay for getaways.

The most important aspect I’ve learned about vacations is that it doesn’t really matter where you go, it’s the company you keep that drives your experiences. Somehow it doesn’t feel as meaningful when you’re not able to share them with your friends or a loved one.

Anyways, I’m sure most of you want to hear how my vacation went… voyeuristic slu`ts that you are. So without further ado:

Vacation Trip, Day 1: Spundae into Sunday

It`s around mid-afternoon. I pick up the guys, TnT and Superman, load up the M3 (yeah, we figure on traveling in style), and we start going down 101 South headed for LA. At TnT’s suggestion, we stop by the Gilroy Outlet Center on our way thereand hit up the Nike Factory Store. Now this is a good and bad idea. It’s good in the fact that I picked up some pretty nice gear at low, low prices, but bad in the fact that I drop 200 bucks without going fifty miles from my house.

Okay, so after shopping like school girls, NOW we’re headed to LA. It takes us about 4 hrs to get there but don’t try this at home folks ‘cause I drive like a fiend. That’s what happens when you average 90mph the whole way down. By early evening we’re in town and checked in a hotel near the LAX. You’d figure we’d be tired after driving all the way down but this is SAT night in LA and that means there’s an event playing somewhere. So of course we gotta get our hands dirty.

Tonight we are going to a Spundae event at Circus. Sometimes Spundae holds parties at 1015 so I figure it’ll be a similar type of scene at Circus. Trance, techno, house music. Hey, we like playing with our glow-stiks remember. I never been to Circus before but it’s pretty much in the middle of a fu`cking ghetto a$$ neighborhood. It’s cool though ‘cause I’ve been to some pretty good clubs in shi`tty a$$ places. (Tangent alert!) This of course begs the question, why the hell do clubs pick the ghetto-ist locations to build from? Does someone go around looking for streets with drug dealers, crack who`res, and crazy bums walking around and say “Hey this looks like a great place to open up a club?” Somebody has got to do a story on this someday. Sorry ‘bout that, back to the mission at hand.

When we get to Circus we end up driving around for 1/2 an hour looking for a parking space. The parking lot is full and there’s no way I’m going to park a bimmer on the streets in a place that looks like Compton on crack. Luckily, a security guard shows up and allows us to stack park our car in one of the lots. But that was just phase one of trying to get in the club. Phase two was standing in a massive line for 2 hours like herded sheep. FAWK! Okay, some of you might think we’re crazy to wait that long for a freakin club and I’d agree with you. There’s no way I’d stand in line that long again but this was our 1st night in LA and we didn’t know of any backup clubs we could hit. By the time we get in the place, it’s near 1am but the music is good and alcohol has a strange way of curing any mood.

TnT and I hit up the bar. I down three drinks immediately and I’m feeling the vibe. Strangely, Superman is nowhere to be found. I order up a long island and go look for my lost friend. Lost? I should have said cornered. When I find him, two very good looking ladies are there with him. One has pinned him against a wall and won’t let him leave. By way of their friendly attitude, I figure he knows them somehow but he tells me that he just met these girls. SHI`T! Not 5 minutes in a club and he’s already got women all over him. Well, we don’t call him Superman for nothing.

Apparently, the two girls, Lisa and Anna, have propositioned my friend for sex. I stand there dumbfounded for a minute. They want to go to a dark corner somewhere to have a threesome. I still stand there slack jawed as Superman tells me this. I ask the two girls if this is true and they nod their heads in confirmation. Shi`t, I knew that most women from LA were shallow, superficial types but I didn’t know that they were this easy. I later find out that they’re actually visiting from Seattle. That explains it.

Superman, being the noble figure that he is, refrains from taking up the girls’ offer. He placates the situation by picking up Lisa’s number instead. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking “NO WAY!! A guy turning down sex?!!!” Everybody has standards and Superman has his. He doesn’t partake in sex with strangers he just meets at a club. Believe it or not he and I are cut from the same cloth and I would have done the same thing. I would have turned down sex too. Really! Hey, why the f`uck you laughing. Shi`t! I’m not that desperate. REALLY!

The DJ spinning that night was Richie Hawtin. Though I’ve never heard of him, he’s supposedly a world famous DJ from Europe. He backs up his rep by turning out the best house music I’ve heard in awhile. Damn, his show was kick a$$. Everyone was going crazy on the dance floor. TnT was insane with his glo-stiks, giving a lightshow to everyone in reach. The music was infectious like that. We got our groove on until closing. Afterwards we went to get our grub on at the Pantry steakhouse in downtown LA. By the time we got back to the room it was past 6am already.

When you’re on vacation it’s time to party hard and expend all your energy on good times. That means staying out at all hours of the night, or should I say morning. Day 1 basically stretched into Day 2 but it was great start to our vacation.

[updated 6/27/2002]

Artist - Chemical Brothers "The Test"

The Other Side

I`m about to go on a voyage of self discovery, a treacherous journey that will test the limits of my inner being. No doubt there will be danger, intrigue, plenty of shady characters, and an endless road of obstacles. This certainly isn`t for the faint of heart. One drink of the local water and you`ll be rendered blind. I will be going to Mexico, our downtrodden neighbor to the south, but this danger I speak of... is in reference to Los Angeles. I have to pass through this den before reaching Taco Bellgrad. It`s ironic how they call it the City of Angeles when it suffers from a severe lack of any semblance of such divine creatures. Shi`t, on top of the silicon parts and shallow personalities, everyone in LA owns a gun. I got gatt flashed by a grandma driving a minivan once.

So I`m making a run for the border. My Spanish doesn`t come close to... how you say... beuno. I plan to practice speaking broken span-glish and trying not to get gang raped in an alley somewhere. Hmmm, I think I had a similar problem in NYC once. Mexico may not have the cleanest bathrooms but you can`t exactly fault a country for coming up with the siesta and one dollar coronas. And those burritos..WHOOWEE... that`s some good eating there. The ocean shall be my toilet!

I`ll be gone for awhile so I won`t be updating. But I plan on keeping a running journal of any escapades that may crop up and I`ll post them up when I get back. Here`s another bit of irony, I`ll be celebrating the 4th of July in a different country. That`s okay though `cause I celebrated Cinco de Mayo in the US. I`m a backwards kind of guy. Hey, I once thought that Michael Jackson was a black man but he turned up being an old, asian lady.

[updated 6/24/2002]

Artist - Nelly "Hot In Here"

Get Jazzy

I couldn`t put my finger on it but there was something amiss. A feeling out of sorts. What could it be? What could be wrong? Oh that`s right, I haven`t cussed in awhile. Mutha f-cking bi`tch a$$ fu`ckin SHIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEET@!! Ah yeah, much fu`ckin better. Gotta get that daily stress reliever know what I mean. Hey, it takes talent to be this coarse.

Weekend Update:

Fri - My best friend from the east coast stopped by for a visit so of course it`s clubbing time. Sometimes the ghetto-ist, grungy places are the best. In this case, it`d have to be 1015 in SF. On occasion, the best underground DJ`s spin there and Fri night was no exception. Well, maybe I thought it was good `cause I was toasted for most of the night.

Sat - Went to the New Orleans by the Bay festival in Mtn. View. Basically, it`s the Bay Area version of the Mardis Gras celebration and they do a decent job pulling it off. All the music and food was from the New Orleans area. Nothing beats eating crawdads, jambalya, and gumbo while listening to live bands performing jazz, bluegrass music in an open air stadium. Oh of course alcohol was present there as well. Um yeah, nothing beats anything while sipping a cold one.

Sun - Preparing for my upcoming vacation to sunny San Diego and Mehico. I`m taking the entire 4thof July week off. HAHAHAHA! Envy me! It`s time for the proverbial summer road trip. Personally, I find road trips to be more of a bonding experience with your friends. It`s a test of your will power as you`re stuck in a cramped car for hours on end. Damn, they have to do a real life TV series on this. They could call it Survivor on Wheels. First person who goes psycho and eats everbody wins. The unintentional comedy would be through the roof. WTF was I thinking... stuck in a car with friends for hours on end... I hate my friends... FEEL SORRY FOR ME!

[updated 6/21/2002]

Artist - Fragma "You Are Alive"

Got Music?

I`ve just been introduced to a new method of downloading music from my friend Ethery and I`ve been keeping busy doing that for awhile. Never to look a gift-horse in the mouth I thought I might share this bit of insight with y`all.

Ever hear of mIRC? Before there was AIM, before Yahoo IM, before ICQ there was mIRC. A realm of different channels where techno geeks could spout and rant about various topics ranging from music, to porn, to hacking tips. Actually, a wide demographic of people use the program but it`s not overly popular because it looks complicated to use. It`s a bit user unfriendly in the fact that you have to type "/msg" before each line when you want to talk to somebody.

Once you become associated with its quirky handling it becomes quite handy. File transfering off their servers is a snap. In this case, I`m looking to download mp3 albums. First, goto their site www.mIRC.com and download the software application. Once installed, input a user name, email address, etc and get connected. When you connect make sure you select the EFNET server. Once you`re in, a window will pop up and scroll down with the various people on their server. In the "Commands" pull down menu, select join channel. Enter channel name #mp3hqdcc (which stands for mp3 headquarters). Cool, now you`re ready to become a download wh`ore.

Wait a couple minutes for the mHQ servers to spit out a text list of their album servings of the day. There are usually 2 or 3 bots that have a selection of albums and they update it every few days. Today, I`m looking to download Wyclef Jean`s new album "Masquerade". Yeah, another great thing about downloading off mIRC is that you can get advanced copies of albums before they are even released. To request a music file all you have to do is follow the directions in the file list. Example: "/msg MP3-DCC03 xdcc send #x"

Download time is pretty quick depending on the amount of traffic. While running on a DSL/cable connection most bit rates range from 50mbits to 100mbits. Oh I forgot to mention that all the files you download are in tar format, basically compressed format. You`ll need to goto www.winrar.com to download the unzip program. Use this app to uncompress all the files DLed off mIRC.

Thus far I`ve been able to cop the following albums:

Avril Lavigne - Let Go
Camron - Come Home With Me
Musiq Soulchild - Julisen
Nelly - Nellyville
VA Promo Only Canada - Urban Radio May 2002
Amber - Naked (Yeah, I got that one 'cause of the title)
Lauryn Hill - MTV Unplugged
Ruff Endz - Someone To Love You (retail)
DJ Boom - Phat Pharm Mixtape
DJ Jay Faire - BET Top 20 vol 15 2002
Wyclef Jean - Masquerade
Hot 97 - Blazin Hiphop Vol 10 2002


Most of the albums are retail, but there are a plethora of various mixes you won`t be able to find in any stores. On top of that, if music videos are your scene, those can be downloaded in VCD format as well. Hell, it`s so easy! If you don`t want to wait around for it finish dowloading just send a request in the morning before you goto work or before you sleep at night. You`ll have a brand new album waiting for you when you`re ready. Damn, with Ethery hooking me up with his mp3 archives and now mIRC, I have 200+ new albums to sort through. I don`t have enough time to listen to them all.

Ifyou have any questions on the above pirating techniques feel free to drop me a note. Happy downloading!

[updated 6/17/2002]

Artist - Voodoo & Serano "Slide to the Vibe"


Chilled Out

If there was a formula for weekends I`d want them to bottle it up and sell it on the shelves. I`d purchase a years worth and use them up ata moment`s notice. Nothing beats 80 degree days and cloudless skies. Gorgeous, gorgeous, goregeoooos. Only thing missing was the pina coladas and the dancing girls.

Weekends like these are made for doing nothing. Just get your a$$ outside and enjoy the weather. Sit around twiddle your thumbs and bask in the glory of nature`s beauty. No need for conversations. Take it all in and be glad you`re alive. Smile a goofy grin and people will wonder what the f-ck you`re smiling about. But that`s what happens when you make believe dancing girls in your head.

Caught a couple movies: Windtalkers and The Bourne Identity.

Windtalkers was an average war movie that was entirely too formulaic. I could have guessed what would happen next with precise accuracy. It`s sad... John Woo has lost touch with his originality. Hollywood must have brainwashed him and said "No more flying through the air with two pistols blazing and shooting 20 guys at once." I`m going to promise myself to not watch another movie with Nic Cage in it. I think I`ve seen him play the same character in his last 10 films. Grade: C+

The Bourne Identity was an excellent spy thriller I must say. Based upon the book by Robert Ludlum some 20 years ago, it`s been updated to reflect a modern feel. It was directed by the same guy (Liman) who did the movie "Go" and "Swingers". Similar camera work was done on all three movies. The close up shots of the character`s faces detail their emotions more. As usual, Matt Damon gave an "A+" performance. He far surpasses his friend Ben Afflect whenit comes to acting talent in my opinion. Just an all around good movie: B+

Oh, I got my car back from the shop too. Good as new. Yippie! (Doing the dance of joy)

[updated 6/12/2002]

Artist - Sergeant Pepper "Charge"

Road Kill

The degree of difficulty riding a motorbike with a sprained wrist is quite daunting. Forget watching out for other vehicles, it`s a challenge just trying to steer. I should have taken up my friend`s offer for a ride to work this morning. If I`d known what was in store for me later on I surely would have.

Riding is a dangerous activity and with any form of risky endeavor, safety gear is in order. With helmet and kevlar lined jacket, one`s body temperature isn`t the most optimal. Combine that with the relatively warm weather outside and you have your own mini-sauna on wheels. I was sweating like mad on my ride to work. The inner portion of my face mask started fogging up and that makes for interesting navigation when visibilty is low.

Somehow I manage to pull into the parking lot without incident. It was good to breath fresh air once again.

Work has been hectic lately with all the recent layoffs. Fifty percent of my department got chopped. As a result, I`m being saddled with extra projects from those who were let go. Now I have three 10 million dollar designs to worry about. With this kind of responsibility it`s no wonder our stock price has taken a plunge.

After 9 hours of fielding customer issues it was time to leave. As I start to turn the ignition I notice something. Nothing is happening. No sign of life. Apparently my battery has died and no amount of cursing was going to make it come alive again. I end up hitching a lift back with a co-worker but one thing repeats in my mind the whole time... "this is one of those days where I should have stayed home and made love to my body pillow... like usual"

Some of you may wonder why (or maybe you don`t give a f-ck) I had to ride my cycle in the first place. Well, my beloved automobile is stuck in the shop for a few days. My friend borrowed it one time and he ended up running over a cat. This feline must have been the size of Fort Knox because the front bumper is cracked and there`s a huge hole in the right wheel guard. Poor kitty must have beenrun over multiple times or something... fur is stuck in the fender.

When it rains, it pours. And then someone pisses on you. It`s a good thing I like that kinky shi`t...

[updated 6/10/2002]

Artist - Brandy "Full Moon"

*CRUNCH* That`s the sound one hears when a 200lb dude steps on your ankle while playing b-ball. *CREEAAAAAAACH* That`s my wrist as I fall down to brace myself against the ground. *SHUFFLE* That`s my attempt to move from point A to point B for the next couple weeks. *WAAAH* That`s the wail of my lamentation as I try to figure out a way to use my hand to relieve myself. A man has needs.

A Higher Power

Early darkness. Creeping shadows cast their spell across the unsuspecting earth. Although daytime, the sun was blocked from the cloudless sky. Hast an evil force taken grasp over humanity? Is this the end? Is this the armaggedon that was foretold by our ancestors? The Aztec civilization believed that when a solar eclipse occured, the sun god was angry atthem. To appeasetheir god they would throw vigins down a deep dark pit to their deaths. Shame... damn waste of virgins if you ask me.

A partial solar eclipse vented its natural greatness today. I looked up at it but couldn`t see shi`t cause I was rendered blind as my retnas burned to a crisp. I think God is agry with me.

[updated 6/05/2002]

Artist - Mos Def and Massive Attack "I Against I"

In Neutral

It`s 1am and I`m still up trying to download the last song to Eminem`s newest album "The Eminem Show". The boy`s got talent. Tightest MC to come up in a long while. He`s moved up in front of Ice Cube in the ranks of all time greatest rappers. Tupac is still #1 though. I like listening to Em`s rhymes because they paint a vivid story. Sometimes humorous, sometimes angry, and all the time controversial. He`s not afraid to get in your face. A big fu`cking hypocrite but at least he admits it. All part of his image I suppose.

His music takes the edge off especially now with the way I`m feeling and all the bullshi`t that`s gone down. I take solace in his furious lyrics, hellbent beats.

Highly combustable/sparking the fire
Oblivious to rain/Don`t irk the ire
Behind the drama, strife and strain
Lurks a man walking around with his inner pain

-B

[updated 6/04/2002]

Artist - Puddle of Mudd "Drift and Die"

Sanguine. Blood, blood, everywhere. Such a bloodbath. So much so that it seeped into the foundation and cracks. So sad, so sorry. You will be missed myfriend, you will be missed. Peace be to you and your family... KP.

Peace be to you all...

[updated 5/30/2002]

Artist - Royce Da 5`9 "Life"

I always seem to write better shi`t when I`m feeling down. Just 1.5 months left but that`s how it is. This is dedicated to Her...

Tomorrow, Tomorrow

Feelings abound/They surround
Wrap me tight/Like a blanket/Warm
Can’t try to dismiss/Can’t escape
They come back/Always reminiscing
In my head they swirl/Pounding my temples
From ear to ear/Beats keep hitting
These thoughts/No dismissin’


This is life/Ain’t no fair
Rich or poor/It don’t care
Caught in it’s grasp/At it’s mercy
Are you, me, him, her and she
Fists on the pavement/Pound away
Hands bleed/But hearts bleed more
Nothing doing/Just look to the Lord


Chorus:
Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I love you Tomorrow
Sands in the hour glass, Time I want to borrow
When the Dream is goneit’s a lonelier place
Wish I could go and replace this empty space


Mask shows/Gotta keep moving
Occupy the mind/Keep it alive
Try as I might/Hard to keep level
Crush grooves/Easy to get disheveled
Twisted/Opportunities not gifted
Gin and juice/Priorities get shifted
Out to sea/Thoughts are drifted


No taking for granted/Like a tree/Planted
Destination unknown/Train without stops
Off the tracks/Gotta keep it locked
Happiness/hopes/Smiles and jokes
Pain behind the eyes/Nobody knows
Day by day/Wrapping the flows
Only lines on my face/The sadness shows


Chorus:
Tomorrow, Tomorrow, I love you Tomorrow
Time is the only thing to replace this sorrow
Ups and downs, happiness and strife
Pawns are we, in this play, in this life

[updated 5/28/2002]

Artist - Fabolous "Trade It All"

This past Memorial Weekend wasn`t exactly memorable because of a certain lowpoint which occured, but I won`t go into detail here just yet. As a diversion I will describe my experience at the beach in beautiful Carmel, CA.

The Discovery Channel Presents: The Fuzzy Playa

If you ever stop by Northern California be sure to stop by Carmel-by-the-Sea. It`s about 10 miles south of Monterrey, home of great clam chowder and whale watching. The charm of Carmel is best depicted in its picturesque oceanside views, cozy village style housing, and friendly wildlife. It`s not exactly sunny by the beach. In fact it`s downright overcast and windy most of the time except for a few weeks during the peak of summer. Despite this hangup, it`s a great time exploring and communing with the wildlife there.

Nearby the beach, there are small shrubs and bushes growing out of the sand. Underneath this growth, underground burrows have been built which house the native ground squirrels. Or as I`d like to call them... fuzzy, wuzzy, chia animals. Armed with camera in hand, I wandered near the shoreline in hopes of capturing these creatures in action.

To my surprise, these chia-like animals are very chatty and I was able to get an interview with one of them by bribing him with food.



Me: "Hi my name is B-1 and I`m doing an interview for my AA journal. What`s your name sir?"

Dino: "Yo, no kidding?! I go on AA all the time at home. My name is Dino (pronounced Deeno). Yeah, I`m cute. All the chicks dig the Dino. Now feed me."

Me: "So what do you do in your spare time Dino?"

Dino: "Not much. Most of my time is spent looking for food. Now feed me DAMMIT".

Me: Um, okay.



Dino eager for food hops on my foot and begins to chow down onsome bread.

Dino: "Yo man, this is really good shi`t. Where`d you get this stuff?"

Me: "We humans go to places called supermarkets to get our food. What you`re eating now is what we call bread."

Dino: "I gotta tell ya man it sure beats scrounging around for nuts, berries, and dead insects. Damn, this shi`t is hella good."

Me: "Yeah, no problem. Um, so what else do you do besides look for food?"

Dino: "What does any guy do?! He has to go scope out chicks of course. Get his mack on, naw what I mean.... heh heh. Hmmm, by the looks of you... you ain`t getting any."

Me: "WHAT! I DO TOO get some."

Dino: "Yeah whatever. By the way, your feet smell like sardines."

Me: "I can`t believe it, I`m being insulted by a chia pet."

Dino: "Here comes a fine honey. Watch, how a playa handles his business."



Dino: "Hey baby. How YOU doing?"

Candy: "I`m hungry."

Dino: "What`s your name babe? I`ll hook you up."

Candy: "My name`s Candy."

Dino: "Yeah, I bet you`re sweet like it too.

Candy: *tee hee*

Dino: "Yo, I got your hook up right here. Check out this bread I got for you."

Me: "Excuse me, I`m the one supplyingthe bread."

Dino: "Don`t pay attention to this human. He`s just my sidekick."

Me: "Waitaminute!"

Candy: "You`re right this food is good. Thank you Dino."

Dino: "No problem babe. Now why don`t we head back to my place. I got a nice crib with wall to wall sand, and a nice leafy bed."

Candy: "Okay, but what`s that sardine smell?"

Dino: "Oh, that`s just my sidekick`s feet. The boy needs to clean himself up. Now, let`s go."

Me: "Thus concludes another one of my many humiliations."

[updated 5/21/2002]

Artist - Qurarashi "Stick Em Up"

Working Stiff

A project of mine has just been put on hold for a few weeks so I`m rather free at work. During off periods in the work cycle we`re supposed to be self motivating and explore our software tools and read up on the technical documentation. Here`s a sample:

"CMOS ASIC products now include redundant memory arrays. In the presence of certain manufacturing defects, fuses are blown, enabling redundant structures and increasing the yield of chips containing redundant memory arrays.

This document describes netlist processing requirements for manufacturing access to redundancy information. This document does not attempt to describe how to interface redundant memory arrays to edge-triggered logic. For functional interface descriptions, refer to Memory Arrays in ASICS application note.

Except as noted in this document, the functional interface to a memory array does not depend on whether the memory array is redundant."

FAWWWK! Now you know why engineers should NEVER EVER write. My head is spinning from reading so many REDUNDANT sentences. I`m surprised that workplace violence is so low. It takes me half an hour just to get through one page of material before I end up either pulling my hair out or being face planted on the desk with drool trickling out my lower lip. For crying out loud, at least insert a joke here and there to keep it somewhat interesting.

So I end up checking AA every 10 minutes just to keep myself sane. I don`t even check notes. I just stare at the pretty banner ads in an attempt to psyche myself out. To tell you the truth, I hardly get notes. I`m not a girl and I don`t have any booty pics up to attract the occasional pathetic desperate loser`s pick up line. Too bad, I`d have a good time shooting them down and messing with their heads. Damn, women have all the fun. I`m relegated to adding people who I don`t even know to my friends list for the entertainment value in their journals. Yup, the secrets out... I`m a peeping tom... damn proud of it too.

Ooops, time for my 1:30 nap time. ZZZZZZ.

[updated 5/20/2002]

Artist - Musiq Soulchild "Half Crazy"

Sweatin` Bullets

The game of billiards is normally played among friends in a stress free environment over a few drinks. Shots are hit, shots are missed, trash talking and teasing ensues... no big deal. Apparently I’ve been playing it the wrong way. Now my eyes are OPEN... and tongue hanging out. As with any competitive sport, something must be on the line to make it more exciting. With DG in town it can be down right titillating (damn, I love that word).

Scene: 1st Street Billiards in Downtown SJ People involved: Me, my friend TnT, my girl DG and her friend MsLa The Game: 8 ball – guys versus girls (Me and TnT versus DG and MsLa) Proposal: If the guys win, DG and MsLa must engage in a kiss. If the girls win, the guys must take body shots off of one another. *Note* I am 100% heterosexual... I can’t 100% speak for TnT though.. heh.

The balls are racked and it’s a perfect break. Things start off well and I line up for my first shot. I repeatin my head “Win DAMMIT! WIN! There will be no undertaking of any bodyshot off any guy tonite!” (Deep breath) A relatively easy three foot shot liesbefore me. As I aim to shoot something distracts me at the corner of my eye. DG is doing a mock strip tease to try to throw off my concentration. Grrr! Damn, I forgot to stipulate no dirty, underhanded tactics in the rules. Women are so devious. (Deep breath again) “Okay” I say to myself, “if that’s the way it’s going to be. We are still going to win this thing… no problem.” I confidently line up my shot and I fire. Things look good, cue ball hit perfectly, it’s going in, rolling, oh wait, crap, ball not hit perfectly, it’s veering a bit, SONOFABI`TCH, ball hits corner bumper and rims out. FU`CKING SHI`T!!! Alright no problem, I’m not worried. TnT is a pretty good player and he’s going to back me up.

I turn to him looking for assurance but one look tells me a different story. He says to me, “hey my hands are shaking and I haven’t even shot yet.” FAAWWK!!! Disturbing visions of me taking a bodyshot off him plays in my head. NO, NO, NO! Dammit, I need oxygen.

Fortunately for us, the opening few salvos are a draw. DG is a so-so player, and MsLa hasn’t been to a pool hall in awhile so her shots are going astray as well. I feel better… that is until 10 minutes later. MsLa goes on a hot streak and pockets balls left and right. We have 6 balls left on the table to their 2. Ouch!

Settling down a bit. With much needed relief we’re able to close the gap despite more come hither looks from DG and MsLa. We’re down to 2 balls versus their 1. Yes! Now I all I gotta do is hit this long distance shot. Wait, I suck at long distance shots. Crap! Just shoot it without scratching I say to myself. I place the cue stick in my hand and try to steady it. Steady, steady... DAMN! Too nervous. I can’t aim properly because my hand is shaking like J-Lo`s a$$ on vicodin. DG unbuttoning her shirt may have something to do with it. I need a drink. I take my beer and gulp the whole thing down. Much better. My nerves calm again, I line up to shoot. Damn, I must have drank too fast. Blood rushes to my head and to my pants. %&$@! Vision blurry. I somehow manage to get stick on ball and roll it forward.

ARRRGH! I miss everything and I scratch.

Now it’s DG’s turn and she easily sinks her last remaining ball. The only thing remaining between me and a homo-erotic body shot is the 8-ball. I’m caught behind the 8-ball so to speak. At this point I’m ready to pass out. The tension is credible. She steps up to the table and *whack*. The cue ball spins forth, hitting the 8-ball. Like slow-motion it rolls toward the left corner pocket, a wordless “No” escapes my lips. Closer it creeps towards its destination, closer I creep to insanity. And then as if by magic it doinks off the edge and lips out of the pocket. I let go of my breath. But wait! As a twist of fate the cue ball is still ricocheting about and it lands straight into a pocket of its own. SCRATCH! I leap up and pump my fists in the air. YES! WE WIN! I high five TnT… being careful not to hug him ‘cause well that would be too damn weird given the circumstances.

For our reward, we are able to watch DG and MsLa make out. But it’s a pyrrhic victory. I’m so drained of our ordeal I’m unable to enjoy the spoils. Isn’t pool fun? Next time I’m sticking to bingo.

[updated 5/16/2002]

Artist - Malyssa "Reminisce"

Life Cycle

Not too recently, I used to think I was invincible. I didn’t care about death. I was fearful of dying, but not death. Death is the end, the finality of life. Dying on the other hand involves pain, and though I have a high tolerance for it I can imagine it hurting like a muther fu`cka. It’s funny how your perception of death changes once you have someone special in your life. You become more wary of taking unnecessary risks TO your life.

I’m seriously thinking about selling my bike. The weather has been nice yet I haven’t ridden in weeks. Part of it has been that I’ve been really busy on weekends lately. The other part is that the passion just isn’t there anymore.

A few weeks ago I was on the freeway when traffic grounded to a standstill. There had been an accident up ahead. As I passed by, I could see what remained of a mashed up motorcycle that was no longer recognizable from its once beautiful, wind tearing self. The flashy blue and white paint job was now riddled with tears and huge chunks of ripped away fiberglass. Not too far off, a bloody cracked helmet could be seen lying on the ground, a stretcher carrying the broken passenger’s body. The blood soaked sheets gave indication that he didn’t make it.

I heard another tragic story from my friend TnT. His friend’s cousin died in a motorcycle accident as well. She was riding down the coastline of Highway 1 when she took a turn too fast and fell off a cliff. By the time her cousin was able to get to her she was already dead. He had to carry her lifeless body back up the mountain by himself. She was a mother of three young children.

No doubt, motorcycle riding is a dangerous sport. I’m trying to decide if it’s worth the risk. It’s true that there are no guarantees in life but it would be foolish to tempt its fate on too many occasions. There’s so much more I want to do before my time comes. There are many adventures that I want to share with her.

[updated 5/13/2002]

Artist - Ying Yang Twins "Say I Yi Yi"

Meet the Friends

I hit the I-5 to LA this past weekend to meet up with DG. This time however, I would also spend an inordinate amount of time with her friends. If it came down to meeting a girl’s friends versus her parents, I’d rather meet her parents. The reason simply because you would probably spend more time hanging out with her friends on a day to day basis and you have to project that much more effort to make a favorable impression. I can’t imagine her parents wanting to go clubbing or downing shots on top of bar tables. There’s something not right about that picture. Scary actually.

LA is the land of beautiful people. There must be something in the water over there because compared to the Bay Area, the amount of pretty ladies out number the ones here 10 to 1. DG’s friends are no exception. They are all well above average looking. That only spells trouble for me. I have a hard enough acting normally in front of one pretty lady. Put me in front of 4 or 5, and I’m like a deer caught in the headlights of anoncoming train. I get runover… repeatedly. Factor in my reserved only child background, mix in my all boys highschool attendance record, and blend in my uncomfortable feeling of meeting large groups of strangers, and you have a royal f-ck up in the making. In the rules of basketball it’s easier to play against one-on-one than one-on-five. This situation is no different.

I’m not the type of person to come up with thought provoking social tangents to spark conversation. On the initial outset, the most you’ll get out of me is small talk. That’s all I can handle at the moment. I have a difficult time remembering just one new person’s background info. Ask me to remember five, and I’ll have to start jotting things down in my Palm Pilot. And I my Palm broke 6 months ago. My humor is of the “cap on you, cap on me” variety. To utilize such tactics with strangers would not be a good idea. Witty remarks are possible, but if you refer to paragraph 2, line 7, you will remember the deer in the headlights comparison. I will be in a catatonic state. Sometimes nothing will come out of my mouth. Other times you’ll get garbled speak “goo goo ga, hrmp geresah, boo boo”. Sort of like what a 1month old baby would say. Most of the time though you’ll just see me listening to the conversation played out before me. I’m a great listener. Mainly because I plan to go into the FBI someday and I need all the info I can get to blackmail your a$$ at a more opportune moment.

Overall I give my “Meet the Friends” scenario a "C-". I neither promoted nor hindered my case. Hmm, now that I think about it I was very bland. A garden variety turnip. Hopefully next time I’ll turn out to be more of a jalepeno. But I plan on shooting for at least bell pepper.

[updated 5/7/2002]

Artist - Camron "Oh Boy"

More Than Meets the Eye

I just found out what my raise would be. Now I`m making an extra buck fifty per hour ontop of my $6.00. Woowee! Silki Silky y`all. I`m going to spend my winnings by getting my legs waxed. But first I must indulge my geekiness by reliving a part of my childhood.

Quickly I speed off to the nearest media store in search of the recently released Transformers Season 1 dvd.

Description:
Earth is the battleground, control of the Universe is the prize, and the only defense is an army of Autobots able to transform into massive fighting machines as powerful as their enemy—the deadly Decepticons. The complete first season is available in this special collector`s edition totaling 16 episodes:
More Than Meets The Eye Part 1
More Than Meets The Eye Part 2
More Than Meets The Eye Part 3
Transport To Oblivion
Roll For It
Divide And Conquer
Fire In The Sky
SOS Dinobots
Fire On The Mountain
War Of The Dinobots
The Ultimate Doom Part 1
The Ultimate Doom Part 2
The Ultimate Doom Part 3
Countdown To Extinction
A Plague Of Insecticons
Heavy Metal War


Talk about awesome!! Doesn`t that just get your heart racing?!! After watching this series I`m going to go play with my toys.

In 1999 I had an unheathy fixation with ebay where I`d pay way too much for the old school action figures. Let`s just say it got real ugly. So ugly that I ended up paying $250 for Skyfire. If you`ve seen Skyfire then YOU WILL UNDERSTAND!

The other part of my weekend was spent viewing Spider-man. Great, great movie. Another faithful adaption of a comic book franchise. Thankfully, they focused on the storyline and character development more so than the action sequences. You gotta respect a guy who can climb on walls. That`s one power I wouldn`t mind having. Do you realize how many positions you can get into? I`ll let you stew on that for awhile.

[updated 5/1/2002]

Artist - Celine Dion "A New Day Has Come"

Taking the Plunge

I like hotels. There`s something about them that makes me imagine that I`m in a giant sandbox. I think it`s because I can jump up and down on the bed and mess up the room without having to worry about the consequences. People who stay in hotels have the good life. They are either a) on vacation, b) on a business trip where the company pays for everything, or c) about to get it on with a call girl. I`ve experienced two out of three and it doesn`t take a genius to figure out which one is missing.

I was watching "Lethal Weapon" on cable in the hotel room and there`s this one scene where Mel Gibson is trying to talk a suicidal man from jumping off a building. Clever Mel acts friendly with the guy and gets him to smoke a cigarette with him. When the suicidal man reaches for the smoke, Mel handcuffs himself to his arm.

Mel: We`re together on this. You can go if you want. But you take me with you. Makes you a murderer.
Suicidal man: You bastard!
Mel: You`ll be killing a cop.


Silence.

Mel: I`m going inside. What say you come with me?

He turns, starts to ease along the ledge. Suicidal guy swallows hard, says: F-ck you, I`m jumping.


And suddenly Mel turns on him. Eyes like steel.


Mel: You wanna jump ... ? You really want to ... ? (long pause; then) Fine. Let`s do it.


He steps to the edge.


Suicidal man: Hey, what the f-ck ...
Mel: You asked for it.
Suicidal man: Hey, wait a minute ... !


Mel does something very drastic. He jerks them both off the ledge. Holy shi`t. The crowd gasps.

Mel: Geronimoooooo ...

Downward they plunge, all ten stories -- Tumbling and falling -- Suicidal man shrieking like a lunatic ... And suddenly, BAM -- ! They land in a fireman`s net. Bounce a few times. Come to rest, safe and unharmed ... Mel rolls over with a sour look on his face. Cops surround them. The suicidal guy is a trifle upset.

Suicidal man: Get him away from me!! Cut me loose!! Crazy f-cker tried to kill me!! Did you see that?? He tried to kill me!!!


Just goes to show that jumping can be fun as long as you have something to catch you on the other end. I took the plunge this past weekend but I`m still wondering if there`s a net at the bottom. And for all you dirty minded people out there... I was a) on vacation this past weekend.

[updated 4/25/2002]

Artist - Cranberries "Analyse"

I just found out I got promoted?! I sit on my a$$ all day doing squat and now I’m moving up the corporate ladder. Interesting. Now I know how morons get put in charge of multibillion dollar companies. It’s so that they have someone to blame later on when it goes bankrupt. It’s a conspiracy I tell ya! I better quit my job and go work at McDonald’s before it’s too late. Um, but not before I fatten my 401k.

I’m scared out of my mind. I’m on a serious winning streak and I don’t know why. I’m suspicious by nature and I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop soon. I’m starting to sound annoying by starting all of my sentences with “I’m”. *slap myself upside the head* That’s better. To counteract my good fortune, I shall think bad ominous thoughts and say “woe as me” 5 times a day when I wake up in the mornings. This can’t continue.. can it?

[updated 4/21/2002]

Artist - Goo Goo Dolls "Here Is Gone"

A Change In Seasons

I love it when springtime weather comes along. It`s a time for new beginnings. There`s something about it that gives me that fresh, crisp, clean feeling. Hmmm, great now I sound like a Masengil douche commercial. Where the hell do ppl come up with those ideas anyways? Does someone sit in a room and say "Gee, it feels dirty down there. Let`s package alcohol in a bottle and sell it to some poor sap off the street." Don`t mind me, I like going off on tagents that have nothing to do with my original thought.

This past Sat I went to a birthday party for an aquaintance of mine. There was a large group of 20 people, most of which I didn`t know very well. Has anyone felt alone in big crowd? That`s how I felt. I prefer smaller, intimate group settings because it`s easier to get to know somebody. I feel like an outsider in posses larger than 5 or 6. I`m the kind of person that likes to be myself and go with the flow. I don`t want to have to expend extra effort by going out of my way to fit into the group mentality. There are a number of problems when hanging out with a large gathering of people. First you have togather them. So you spend at least an hour waiting for everybody to show up. Then once everyone is assembled you have the pleasantry of introducing everybody. About 15 different names that I will soon forget in the next 5 minutes. The worst thing about it is trying to decide what to do later on in the night. Everyone has a differing agenda of where to go and someone is bound to get disappointed.

I didn`t feel like going clubbing that night, but the b-day party crew ended up going to 1015 in the city. If I was driving I would havegone home but since I wasn`t I had an obligation to stick around. Besides, it`s not good to hitchhike in the city.. you`re bound to get picked up by some sadist in a gimp outfit and my a$$ hurts enough as it is. Needless to say, I was bored out of my mind at the club. Why? Cause DreamGirl was in my thoughts all night. Last weekend with her was explosive... not firecracker explosive but like 20 million solar fusion reactions explosive. Any weekend without her would be destined to be weak on the richter scale.

Next time should be a much different scenario. I`m going to be meeting her in the City of Angeles. I like springtime weather... it`s a time for new beginnings...

[updated 4/16/2002]

Artist - Shakira "Underneath Your Clothes"

Bold & Spicy

Are you a dare devil? When I`m out partying there`s nothing I wouldn`t try and this past weekend the "boldness" was stepped up a couple notches.

Who: Me, DreamGirl (my friend from LA), DreamGirl`s friends, and my bud superman
Location: Club Ibiza hosted by Organic
Mission: Get wild and crazy
Result: All eyes on us


Club Ibiza is situated inside a hotel. Part of the setup is located outside, surrounding the swimming pool and hot tub. Our mission was to first down as many drinks as possible to get a healthy buzz going, get on the dancefloor and shake that a$$... and later on JUMP IN THE HOT TUB. Yup, you heard me. GET IN THE HOT TUB IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CLUB. How many people have gone swimming in the midst of partying inside a club? Not many I imagine. But that was the plan or so it seemed...

People who initially meet me think that I`m a quiet reserved guy. Little do they know, there`s a heart of a crazy man beating inside me. I have a hard time shying away from a dare... and an even harder time shying away from a woman`s dare. It was DreamGirl`s suggestion that we hop in the hot tub. There`s no way I can say no to her `cause... well.. she has these really deep eyes, the kind that you can drown in, and her nose crinkles a bit when she smiles... the crinkling aways gets to me. However, there are limits to my boldness and jumping in a hot tub in a crowded club was pushing it.

The first part of the mission goes according to plan. We have more than a few drinks and start dancing to the DJ beats. Superman slinks away somewhere and comes back with glowstiks. Uh oh, it`s lightshow time. It`s never a party until somebody breaks out glowstiks for trance/house music. Trance/house without glowstiks would be the equivalent of traffic without swearing... just doesn`t work.

After getting our groove on till 2am, it`s now or never. People are milling around the pool but there is NO ONE ELSE IN. Hmmm, "am I really going to do this?" I say to myself. DreamGirl bats her eyelashes at me. F-ck it! One, two, three. We all strip and jump in. Imagine hundreds of pairs of eyes on you at once. Then imagine... *APPLAUSE*. I`m not an attention seeking person, but in this case I can live with it. We were the life of the party. Everyone was whooping and hollering. Another girl we didn`t know decided to jump in the pool too. We all started playing catch with our glowstiks. Superman was displaying his skills by talking to 10 girls at once by the side of the pool. DreamGirl had a good time relaxing in the warm water and teasing me. I got to see her in a bikini. All was well....

[updated 4/10/2002]

Artist - John Mayer "No Such Thing"

Gone Fishing

Thinking about looking for a new job, I began to update my resume the other day. It`s amazing how one piece of 8x11 paper can either catch a recruiter`s eye or have them skip you by w/o a second glance. If my life were depicted by a resume it`d go something like this:

Name: B-1, Address: Living under a bridge waiting for unsuspecting visitors

Objective: Take over the world. Be able to unstrap a bra with two fingers. Find a Mrs. B-1. I`d be happy with 2 outta 3.

Education: School of Hard Knocks, GPA: Enough to get by, with special emphasis in f-cking up royally.

Experience: Hits and misses. Relationships read like a battlefield. If love means thinking about someone 24/7 and feeling at peace with yourself when they`re around, then I`ve been in love with my hands for the past 15 years... haha.

Other highlights include:

A pathetic attempt at a rap career in the summer of `97 with two other asian engineers. Predictably it didn`t last too long.

Drinking a 2 foot tall margarita with 15 shots in Vegas and later throwing up in a hot tub.

Being chased by apack of wild dogs from 1980-1988.

Able to look black, mexican, korean, filipino, japanese, viet, and martian... apparently I get mistaken for ethnicities other than chinese.

Hobbies: Watching the comedic stylings of Conan O`Brien. Taking notes on Charlie Brown`s love life. Counting the number of stars in the sky... I`m up to 104123411423. Imitating the dance moves from MTV videos.

Skills: Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Lip synch. Make cereal and toast both AT THE SAME TIME! Really good at kissing. <- had to throw that in

Think I can get a job with any of those credentials? Well, if you`ve been reading my journal lately you`ll know that I`m bored at my workplace. I need something more challenging. Something that a dolphin can`t do. Maybe even something that`ll put me in a higher tax bracket. I like money for what it can do for me but I hate keeping track of it and worrying about exact change. I think Tupac said it best when he said "man makes the money, but money don`t make the man." I`d like to buy my own place someday but the housing here is SO expensive. To get a decent place in a primo location here would cost a million bucks. Yup, pretty CRAZY! I used to think a million dollars was a lot of money, but after living in Silicon Valley for so long it`s like chump change. People throw money like that around everyday. It`d be nice not to think about money and just live on a deserted island somewhere. But then there`d be no one around and I`d end up making love to a monkey. That`s disgusting though `cause they`re much too hairy for me. However, the opposable thumb would come in handy. Nah. I prefer humans. Let me clarify. Female humans... female, non-hairy humans. Much better. I`ll have a side of chump change and a Maxim model too please.

[updated 4/4/2002]

Artist - Res "They Say Vision"

Class Is In Session

When you were a kid, who among you hated to be called on during class by the infamous teacher? It seemed like every time I didn’t know the answer, I’d be called on to answer the question. I’d stand up and try to bullsh!t my way out. But of course, I’d look the fool.

Me: “Well, you see due to my religious and ethnic background I can’t answer that question.”

Teacher: “There’s only one problem with your theory young man. As I recall, you were born in the States, and this is a Catholic school that you’re going to. In this classroom I am God and you are my b!tch”.

Me: *gulp* Does this mean I have to give you a foot massage after school again?

Teacher: “Yes, yes it does.”

Me: Miss Johnson, can I wear gloves this time? You have huge corns on your feet and they scare me.”

Teacher: “No!”



Ah yes, the memories. Well, the shoe is on the other foot now. To the chagrin of parents everywhere, I’ve volunteered to tutor the malnutritioned young minds of our generation. How did this horror come about you say? *grin* If you pay enough cash upfront they’ll let you get away with anything.

Humor aside, I had my first sessionthis past Tues with a poor 9 yr old kid who was struggling with his math homework. You would think with my engineering background that I’d have a firm handle on the subject, but take into account that I sit on my a$$ all day at work and haven’t touched addition in the last couple years and the warning light will say “Houston! We have a problem”.

My student’s name was Dijon… yeah, like the mustard. A shy kid, but he seemed willing to learn. The assignment was decimals... adding, subtracting, and converting them to fractions. Damn, I hated fractions when I was kid so I understand his troubles. As older and supposedly wiser adults we tend to take for granted for what we know. Something as simple as figuring out where to put the decimal point can be a huge obstacle for a kid just starting to learn it. So that’s how it went... it was back to the basics for me and I started from the beginning. At the end of the night, my protégé was able to solve most of the problems and wasn’t dozing off quite yet. Success? Well spitballs weren`t flying in my direction so that was a good sign. But from my point of view, he still needs to brush up on his multiplication tables. Makes me wonder what the hell schools are teaching kids these days. All and all, it was a good start and I look forward to imparting my wisdom once again.

Professor B-1... damn, now that’s a scary thought isn’t it?

[updated 4/1/2002]

Artist - Kai Tracid "Too Many Times"

Into The Mix

April fools everybody!

Well, it wasn`t a sucka free weekend. Fri, my friends and I were supposed to hit Bas in the City but we ended up going to 550 again. Is that 3 times in a row? Afraid so. The music that night wasn`t happening at all. Mostly hiphop and some weird jamaican tunes. Nothing against those two genres but I was hoping for more variety. To top it off, the place wasn`t crowded at all. It`s never a good thing when all you have to look forward to is drinks at a club. Speaking of drinks, one of my friends (superman) ordered the nastiest crap... goldslagger, mixed with 151 and peppermint snops. Bleah! Headache for the rest of the night. I couldn`t wait to pass out back home... and I did.

Here`s the sh!itty part of the weekend. I was washing my car and I found out somebody tried to steal the emblem off my car. I didn`t notice it before but the back portion of my car has some paint scrapes from somebody trying to pry the bimmer logo off my ride. Of course when I realized that, I was like... MUTHA FU`CKING SH!T A$$HOLE SON OF A MOTHERLESS GIMP!!! Damn, I was pissed. A guy messing with a man`s car is like someone messing with a man`s woman. Sh!t is shameless. If you have any decency at all NEVER mess with a man`s car or his gf. Damn! If I ever find out who did this, the person will be rendered impotent. Either that or make the perpetrator watch "Gitter" a hundred times... now that`s a fate worse than death.

At least the weekend wasn`t a total wash. My hacker friend Ethery was able to hook me up with 20 gigs of mp3s, and a couple games. You the man! It`s gonna take me hours just to sort through all of it. If anyone knows of any good music files to DL let me know. If you`re nice, maybe I`ll even send you some...

[updated 3/28/2002]

Artist - iio "Rapture"

Crazy man speaks truth?

For some reason I always seem to attract the weirdos. I was coming out of the post office the other day when I was approached by a grungy, homeless man with wild beet red eyes and rank alcohol breath.

Him: Can you spare some change?
Me: Let me see what I can…
Him: Don’t hit me!
Me: Um, I didn’t do anything.
Him: Who do you think you are?
Me: Well, I’m second gen Chinese, born in the Southbay…
Him: Really?! I’m Chinese too.
Me: Are you sure? I think you’re Caucasian. Your skin is white or at least I think it is. That dirt is covering up most of your face.
Him: Oh yeah. I forgot to shower last week.
Me: Uh huh. I’m just going to step in here for a minute.
Him: Don’t you want to hear my story?
Me: Is it going to take long ‘cause I really feel like hanging myself at this moment.
Him: Not long. I’m where I am now ‘cause I used to work at a dot com startup but it went bankrupt. I got a divorce, my wife took everything, and I’m broke. But you want to know the real reason why I’m fu`cked up?
Me: Not really, but go ahead.
Him: My d`ick fell off from masturbating too much. *Cackling*


I stood there dumbfounded for a second thinkingabout what he just said. Him being Chinese, I can’t believe. Working at a dot com, I don’t think so. D`ickfalling off masturbating... damn I hope not.

[updated 3/26/2002]

Artist - System of a Down "Toxicity"

I Swear (Cussing Etiquette 101)

Reading ency’s journal lately has revealed her plight of not being able to cuss properly. Never fear B-1 is here. Cussing should always flow naturally and come out during proper times. Any fool can swear up a storm but they come off as another wannabe ghetto child whose been listening to too much gansta rap. A well placed cuss word can put somebody in his/her place, provide an opportunity to belittle somebody thereby providing much amusement for your friends, or just relieve stress in an uncontrollable situation. Here are the dos and don’ts of cussing etiquette.

Perfect opportunities:

Traffic - The roads are full of moronic drivers. If you have trouble dropping "F" bombs in speaking situations, now is the perfect opportunity to practice your spontaneity and delivery.

Example: A driver cuts you off forcing you to brake suddenly. “What da f`uck do you think you’re doing?!! Dumba$$ mutha fu`cka! Stupid, stupid fu`cking a$$ sh!t for brains SOB.!!!” Ah, feel much better? Of course, the situation hasn’t changed one bit, but don’t you feel stress relieved?

Sporting events – It’s proper to cuss at opposing players to get them rattled. Of if you’re watching at home, feel free to vent your frustrations at the referees or team players for failing to score.

Example: During the closing seconds of a b-ball game, one of the referees fails to call a blatant foul as your favorite player drives towards the basket. “Fu`cking ref!! What da f`uck are you doing??!! Blind as a bat mutha fu`cka!!! The guy in the nose bleed seats could have seen that. This is total fu`cking bullsh!t!!!

Among friends – It’s always cool to swear at your friends. Good or bad situations, it doesn’t matter.

Example: Your friend has justflaked on going out with you and your buddies.

You: “So how come you didn’t come out last night?”
Friend: “Sorry man, last minute change of plans. This girl called up and…”
You: “A girl?? *laugh* You’re f`ucking mom?”
Friend: “Fu`ck you! It was this chick from...”
You: “A guy!?! You fu`cking f`aggot!!!”
Friend: “Oh my bad, you’re right... you called me”
You: “Yeah, and you loved every second of it. Fu`cking dumb a$$!”


This back and forth dialogue could go on for hours so there is a downside.

Bad situations:

- Never cuss in front of your boss. Makes you look unprofessional. However it is okay to cuss if your server crashes and you lose a ton of runtimes on your scripts.
- Don’t cuss in front of parents. It makes them feel bad that they raised such a potty mouthed a$$hole of a child.
- Restrain swear words in the company of children. Pretty much a lost cause b/c they’ll sneak into some R rated movie someday and learn it anyway. But you don’t want to be the catalyst
- Don’t cuss when you start dating someone. Makes you look like an uncouth ogre. After you’ve been dating for awhile, it’s okay ‘cause you’ll have him/her in the palm of your hand by then.
- Try not to swear when you’re wearing good clothes. For me, it just looks strange when somebody swears and they’re wearing a $3000 Armani suit. Just doesn’t look right. Feel like swearing? Dress down.


There are hundreds of other proper/improper situations I can think of but I`m tired and I need to sleep now. Need more? Send a note...

[updated 3/25/2002]

Artist - The X-ecutioners "It`s Going Down" (repeat)

Going down at the movies (a Blade 2 review)

Blade 2 is best summed up as an orgasmic experience. No, there are no nudity scenes in the movie, but action fans everywhere will be fully satiated and spent after two hours of visceral in your face carnage. As quoted from the often maligned but entertaining www.aint-it-cool-news.com site by movie insider Harry Knowles: “BLADE 2 is the tongue, mouth, fingers and lips of a lover. The Audience is the clit.” Yes my friends, Blade 2 will go down on you like a rabid prison inmate who hasn’t seen a woman in 20 years. Five minutes into the movie and you will know what I mean.

“This is where Guillermo Del Toro (the director) goes down on the audience. It starts with long licks with a nose bump on the joy button slowly. He smiles as he does this...”

Blade, played by Wesley Snipes, is seen chasing vampires, blasting away at them with his massive handgun, slicing and dicing them with his twin bladed boomerang, punching/kicking them into bloody submission, and finally somersaulting onto a moving motorcycle killing it’s passenger with a strangle move and stopping himself just before he crashes. That’s just one of the many foreplay scenes. The movie slows down to allow you to catch your breath and just when you think you’ve had enough, it speeds up it’s thrusting… I mean sequences with another mind blowing over the top performance.

“The audience relaxes… labored breathing… a sated smile, WHEN SUDDENLY THE RELENTLESS BASTARD IS AT IT AGAIN!!!! You begin laughing, trying to push him away, but no... more pleasure, more joy, more fun… You can’t handle it, you start giggling and screaming... And it goes like this for quite some time, till at the end... The credits roll, the theater lights come up... You look at the screen, you realize you want that tongue again.”

I bet this is the first review that you’ve ever read that’s been described in such an NC-17 manner. No insipid, stuffy, limp di`ck, 50 yr old commentary here. This movie was made by geeks for geeks. There is plenty of phallic imagery throughout the film. Just take a look at one of the Reapers and you`ll be nodding your head in agreement. On a side note, I just have to say that Wesley Snipes is a total bad a$$ in this movie. With the sad shortcomings of age readily apparent in Swartzenegger and Stallone, it’s good to see a new hero take the reigns and satisfy sex starved… err action starved fans worldwide. I especially like Blade’s shades. He gets pummeled WWF style, kicked in the face, and gets thrown against a column of marble without breaking his sunglasses. Amazing! Where can I get a pair of those?

Suffice it to say, if you’re a virgin and you watch Blade 2, you will instantly be deflowered. Need I say more? Two very high fingers... thumbs up!

[updated 3/21/2002]

Artist - Pink "Don`t Let Me Get Me"

Hi, my name is "Bob"

I work for a fortune 500 company and the campus to our place is huge. 10 thousand ppl can work here at any given moment which rivals most small colleges. There`s a gym, two cafeterias, and a small park complete with a pond and it`s own geese on site. It`s relaxing sometimes to go to the park to take a break and feed the ducks and geese swimming in the pool.

Despite the large size of our company, the division I work for is rather small. I belong to a team of about 40 ppl working in one of the many buildings here. One of the members (Eric) of my team is a recent transfer from China. Like most non-native Americans his english isn`t too good. He likes calling me Bob. I guess "Baldwin" is too hard to pronounce. Bob?? Damn, I don`t see myself as a Bob... it`s so "Joe Blow", ordinary. I`d consider myself a Brandon, Bruce, or Bad Mutha Fu`cka. (Can anyone tell I`m a Bruce Lee and Pulp Fiction fan?) Anyways, I`m too polite (or else I`d slap him upside the head) so I humor him and let him call me "Bob".

In addition to butchering my name, he also has trouble distinguishing American slang. On one of the recent emails he received, one of the developers described a problem he was working on as "a wild goose chase". He thought in order to solve the problem he had to literally go chase a goose and present it to our customer. I tried to explain to him that a "wild goose chase" is just a figure of speech used to convey "a waste of time solving a problem that doesn`t need solving".

Unfortunately, I don`t think I got through to him. Last I saw he was headed to the park on campus. I hope our customers like goose flambe...

[updated 3/18/2002]

Artist - Nas "Rule"

A Nightmare on Gym Street

Ugh, I felt like puking up my dinner at such a disgusting sight. TnT and I usually hit the gym on weeknights and tonight was no different. At least that`s how it started. This beginning had the element of a b-type horror flick. It starts out normally, but towards the end you start hearing the creepy music (dun dun da dum) and something bad happens.

We get therearound 8pm and it`s pretty crowded at that time. It`s a good time to start working out `cause that`s when all the aerobic classes end and you can see all the lovely gym ladies walk out with a thin sheen of sweat on them. That always turns me on for some reason. (Okay, so I`m a horn dog... so sue me!)

So far so good, the classes let out and TnT and I take a break from bench pressing to check out the show. Sometimes, guys take those types of aerobic classes too and one of them that comes out is this really big fella. I don`t think anything of it at the time and I continue pumping iron. (Jaws theme is slowly beginning to build up.)

Fast forward to the free weights. I`m by myself and I start to pick up the 45 pounders... okay, okay... I lied, I pick up the 35 ones... happy now! I begin doing the curls on the incline seat... 1, 2, 3... 22... 87. =P Out of the corner of my eye I see Jaws come towards me and pick up a couple free weights. (Da dum, da dum, da dum... )

All of a sudden the big fella starts flexing in the mirror. I think this comical at first `cause guys do this sometimes... it`s an ego thing. But then the horror begins. He takes off his shirt and attempts to flex his abs. Now, this guy has a spare gut the size of an 18 wheeler. While he`s trying to flex, rolls start rippling. A jiggling hypnotic motion ensues. (AIIIEEE!) On top of that, an unbearable smell starts emanating. Something must have died in between one of those tidal waves. (NO!!! PLEASE! ANYTHING BUT THAT!) Now this is a gym "no no". An overweight guy taking his shirt off in the gym is the equivalent of a chubby woman trying to fit herself in a tight fitting tank. Do us all a favor and keep a baggy shirt on at all times please!

At this point everyone else sees what he`s doing. A gym trainer comes over and asks "Sir, could you please put your shirt back on? We require that everyone be properly dressed at all times". But it`s too late.. the damage is done... I`m on the floor trying to keep from passing out, spots are flashing in my eyes, I feel nauseous... ever so slowly I crawl to the fresh air outside. (There better not be a sequel!)


The Thin Friend Line

On a recent series of “Friends” episodes, Joey has a conflict of interest when he struggles to admit to Rachael that he likes her more than just friends. That got me thinking. (Yes a dangerous thing!) Where do you draw the lines of friendship? Sometimes it can be hard to distinguish that line. Say you’ve been dating someone for awhile, how do you determine whether or not you want something more or something less? I hate that decision. Often times it can be a battle of two heads. The one on top versus the one on the bottom. It’s a battle of loneliness versus companionship, emotion versus lust. Make the wrong decision and the friendship could be over. Don’t make a decision and you can drive yourself insane with possibility. Don’t you just hate the realm of the unknown. If I could kick “unknown’s” a$$ I would. Sometimes I wish I had a crystal ball where I could peer into the future. First I’d look for all the upcoming lottery numbers. Then I’d look up whom I’m supposed to be with. But that would probably take all the mystery out of life, right? Great, now I’m talking to myself! To whoever’s out there, I’m just venting. I recently made a decision along the thin friend line and I don’t know whether or not it was the right one. I guess time will tell all. Did I mention that I would really like to kick “time’s” a$$ too.

[updated 3/15/2002] later in the afternoon

Okay, somebody just sent me this story about her having sex on a office room conference table and now I really can`t work. Yeah, you know who you are! My imagination is running wild... daydreaming... if only...

[updated 3/15/2002]

Artist - Default "Wasting My Time"

Working in Coal Mine

I’m sweating bullets. Guilt is burning a hole in the lining of my stomach. I really shouldn’t be doing this. I’ve been sitting here at my desk at work trying to look productive while being bored to death for the past few days. Is it wrong for me to collect a paycheck at the corporation’s expense? So I shuffle papers. I scatter technical documents across my table to make it look like I’m busy. I pick up the phone and spout key phrases like “timing rules”, “testability analysis”, and “synthesis checks” even when there’s no one else on the other line. There’s an Excel spreadsheet hidden behind my AA website for quick click-ability in case someone walks into the room. If you suffer from any of the above habits then you too are culpable of GPfDN... getting paid for doing nothing.

For $19.95 you can purchase a handy guide to further your GPfDN habits by learning hundreds of ways to look busy in a work environment. Learn secret ways to shave work hours by literally doing whatever it takes to placate your boredom. Send check or money order to: 808 Bumming Around Road. PO BOX 4321, Slumber, CA. Learn from the master...DO IT NOW!

One of these days I’m going to go up to my boss and say “I can’t take it anymore! Here! I’m returning my paycheck. I’ve been a bad, bad, employee for taking this money without having earned a single penny of it. I’m so ashamed.” *sob*

Yeah right! And give up my naps in the afternoon?! Never!

Damn, I’m such a lazy bastard. Ah well, what the hell… it’s a living.

[updated 3/12/2002]

Artist - Bengals "Eternal Flame"

*DISCLAIMER* The following excerpt is a fictional entry taken from my collection of short stories called Full Circle. Any likeness to any of the characters is purely coincidental. At its heart these stories chronicle a man`s perspective on relationships. Although written from a first person perspective, it in no way represents who I am. I`m not that pathetic...haha. I appreciate any criticism and or suggestions. If you like it, hopefully this can become an ongoing thing.

The Song (A Full Circle short)

“Man, stop looking at her picture. Stop torturing yourself like that.”
Mack glared at me and I put my wallet back in my pocket.
“Why do you still have her picture in your fu`cking wallet anyways?” asked Mack.
“I dunno, I just do okay,” I replied. “Besides, don’t you have any pictures in yours?”
Mack turned to me and let out a lecherous grin.
“Of course I do,” He said. “I keep a bevy of b!tches in my wallet…. Jenna Jamison, Janine, Kobe Tai.”
We both laughed at that. I can always count on Mack to cheer me up when I’m down.


Mack and I always stopped for beers after work on Thursday nights at this bar called Toons in downtown SJ. Itwas quiet tonight. Despite half price happy hour drinks, there were only a few other patrons besides us. The jukebox played the Bengal’s Eternal Flame in the background.

Mack took a swig of his Guinness.
“Do what I tell you, man. Take her picture out your fu`ckingwallet and burn it.”
I thought about that for a second.
“Maybe you’re right.”
“Damn right I’m right. Sh!t, take it from me... women ain’t nothing but trouble. Just love em and leave em. That’s what I always say.”
I didn’t say anything to Mack. Instead I gripped my beer and chugged the rest of it.
“Barkeep, I’ll have another one.”


The song continued to play. Not too long ago it played during happier times. It was her song. Her`s and mine.

[updated 3/10/2002]

Artist - Natalie Imbruglia "Wrong Impression"

*shaking the magic 8-ball* Things look woozy. I`ve been lying sick in bed all weekend feeling sorry for myself `cause I haven`t been about to go out and enjoy this weather we`re having. No new insights here. Okay maybe just one... if you take enough cough medication you can attain a buzz of rather epic proportions. I guess my Sat nite wasn`t a total waste after all. I ended up hitting on myself.

[updated 3/7/2002]

Artist - J-Lo "Ain`t It Funny" Good Doggie

The other day I was talking to a friend on the phone when she mentioned that she took the bus to work. She was describing all these stories of weirdos on the bus line and this got me thinking about my bus experiences. I haven’t ridden a bus anywhere since my first year in highschool. During that time I’ve had my fair share of encountering weird ppl on the bus (like this one time where this girl began playing jingle bells with the next stop indicator) but there is one instance in particular that stands out. It was a rainy day and I wanted to get home from class as soon aspossible. As I got on the bus I could see that it was nearlyfull except for this one area near the back where this grungy old man was sitting. Everyone else seemed to becrowded in a 3 foot radius around him doing everything they could to avoid the guy. I was tired and didn’t think much of it at the time so I sat next to him. Two minutes into the ride he started chanting… or maybe it was groaning. “Ooooooouooouuum, Oooooumoooum”. I looked through the corner of my eye to see what was going on. From appearance alone I could see why no one was sitting next to him. I didn’t notice it before, but up close I could see that he was soaked from head to toe and it looked as if he had been playing in the mud. He was wearing a faded gray coat, and brown cordoroy pants that blended nicely with his dirty torn up sneakers. His hair was long like a hippie’s, going down to his shoulders and covered most of his eyes. After chanting for a bit, he started babbling. “Wet! Biscuit! Munch! Down!”. At this point I was thinking “why me” and started looking for a way out. I began inching my way left but the fat guy sitting next to me wouldn’t budge and I was bouncing off of him. Dammit! I still had 20 minutes left until my final stop. Awhile later, the guy started barking like a dog. “Ruff! Grrrrr! Bowwee-Wowee!”. He clutched his stomach and made a motion to his mouth. I thought to myself maybe this guy is hungry so I said “you want something to eat?”. He looked up at me expectantly and nodded. I had some cookies left over from lunch in my backpack so I gave them to him. Grabbing the cookies he started to eat them like Cookie Monster from Seasame Street. Cookie bits were flying everywhere. Munch, munch, munch, munch. Midway he would pause and growl to make sure no one tried to take his food away from him. Munch, munch, munch, munch, munch. After he was finished, chocolate chip was smeared near his eyebrows and crumbs could be seen near his nose, beard, and ontop of his head. He grinned in satisfaction only to reveal yellow stained teeth and more chocolate chip victims that didn’t escape in time. Thankfully by then,my stop was coming up. As I got up to leave, I patted him on the head and stepped out the exit. I was going to scratch him behind the ears too but thought better of it. When I was out in the open air again, I swore I heard whimpering in the background. The type of whimpering only a dog makes when his master is leaving the house. When I got home I promptly gave myself a flea and tick bath. From then on, I’d always be armed with extra cookies on the bus… and a stun gun just in case.

[updated 3/4/2002]

Artist - ATB "Don`t Stop"

Wild Weekend

I hate being confused. I was confused three nights in a row this past weekend. The demon liquid that is alcohol was a key contributor.

FRI night: Dinner and send off of Bruin96 before he heads back to the dreary cold temperatures of Pittsville, Mass for his Med internship. (They call it Pittsville for a reason) This would also be the first time in a long time the Magnificent 7 would be gathered together.

*DISCLAIMER* Unlike the fictional Magnificent 7, we don`t go riding around battling evildoers. Instead, we contribute to the financially strapped bartenders in our area by filling up their tip jars.

The Magnificent 7 are:

B-1: (Moi) The so called dangerous one. Some ppl say I look it, but I say they`ve been drinking too much bong water. No need to fear me... unless I`ve been eating alot of burritos.

Bruin96: The MD. Currently, he`s doing his med internship marooned in some backwater town in Mass. This man hasn`t seen a real woman there in months. Ladies, please help him out and talk to him.

Superman: Known as the ladies man because a lot of women like him. He`s not a player, just really picky. As a result, he`s broken alot of hearts and left the majority of Bay Area women jaded and undateable. He`s currently waiting for Jennifer Love Hewitt to call him.

TnT: The mysterious one. International man of mystery. No he isn`t Austin Powers, but he dances like him... except with glow-sticks. He may not reveal much about himself, but give him enough drinks and he`ll crack faster than Monica Lewinsky at a Bill Clinton fund raiser.

kouhe: The animation expert. Also known as the pushover, punching bag, and stepping stone when it comes to women. kouhe if you`re reading this don`t get mad... Kim said it not me. =P

Ethery: The Neo of the bunch. He can get you any music file, movie or video game before it even hits the market. He judiciously pirates... I mean borrows from online sources. If the FBI calls I don`t know him.

Mikee: Pu`ssy-whipped. He has a girlfriend and we don`t see much of him anymore. Enough said.

The mission: Get Bruin96 drunk and make it a night not to remember. Location: Downtown SJ bar scene Result: complete and utter failure

There is a very good reason for this breakdown of events. TnT, kouhe, and I decide to get a bottle of Yager for some pre-drinking drinking before going out. Not a good idea. We were pretty much toasted in our own little world while trying to match Bruin96 drink for drink. It turns out we become the drunken fools and not him. DAMN! Next time Bruin96, you`re going down!

SAT night: Hitting club 550 in SF with friends and friends of friends. You know a club is good when the name is the number of an address.

Typical conversation:

TnT: It’s really loud in here. Me: What? TnT: The DJ is really mixing well tonight. Me: I can’t hear a damn thing you’re saying. TnT: What? Me: The music is really loud. TnT: Let’s get something to drink. Me: Sounds good to me!

We are not wallflowers. Enough drinks in you and anybody can become a dancing machine. It can be a surreal experience. Needless to say...

SUN night: I’ll just say one thing... drinks with a woman can cloud your judgement.

[updated 2/27/2002]

Artist - Beanie Siegal "Roc tha Mic"

The deadline

I was recently talking to someone online when the subject of age came up. I said I just turned 28, and the response I received back was “that’s old”. At first this didn’t bother me, but then I got another response that said “shouldn’t you be married by now?” Should I be? Isthere a set agelimit for men when they no longer become attractive to women? Say you have a 32yr old guy who’s still single. Does a 23yr old woman think that he’s too old to date? Does a 25yr old woman think that he’s too old to date? What do women think about dating older men? How old is too old? Back when I was 21, I thought I would like to get married by 26. Well, that went by like a fart in the wind without so much as a sniff of marriage in sight. After 26, I thought I’d like to be married before I reached 35. Now, I don’t know. Hell, it’s hard enough trying to get a date at 28, how do you get one at 32? I wonder if my standards are too high. As the years go by, I can feel my resolve crumble a bit. Instead of Tyra Banks, I’ll settle for Renee Zellwegger. Okay, maybe not Renee since I lost her number awhile ago. She keeps changing it for some reason. I could offer a laundry list of who is and isn’t my type, but I’ve narrowed it down to a few criteria. The kind of woman I’d be interested in would be someone I’d be attracted to physically (obviously), with high moral aptitude, emotional intelligence, and a nurturing yet spunky personality. Yeah, I know what you’re saying… Tyra Banks again. I lost her number too. What’s the point of all this? I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s easy to fall into that trapofloneliness, wavering in that limbo of wanting someone now as opposed to waiting for someone who sparks your interest later. Rating your potential mate with a laundry list of criteria is a pointless affair. Ultimately youwill have to compromise some things because the perfect “one” is a fairytale. Personally, I’d rather be alone than have the prospect of marrying someone wrong for me. But even I have learned to be less picky. You just have to know what to be selective about. Marriage shouldn’t be set to any timetable. To quantify a deadline for it would be as silly as setting a time for your own demise. I may not be getting any younger but I`m comfortable in my own skin and that's what's important. Now where the hell did I put my reading glasses?

[updated 2/24/2002]

Artist - Tweet "Oh My!"

This is what I have to look forward to every morning when I wake up.



Ah yes, lazy Sunday afternoons. With days like this hitting 80 degrees in Feb, it feels as though I`m on vacation in a tropical location. Then again, the weather smiles nicely 80% of the year in Cali. I guess that`s why most ppl want to move here. People who consider California the rebel state have just a twinge of jealousy in them I suppose. Yeah, it`s a hard life but somebody`s got to do it. The only problem is motivating myself to go to work in the mornings. It`s tough to do when it`s so nice outside. All things considered, it`sa welcome dilemma to have. Hmm, I wonder if my boss will believe me when I call him up and say: *cough* "I`m really sick, I don`t think I can come in for the next 2 weeks." Think he will buy that? Maybe if it was windy and raining like a b*tch I`d actually want to come to work. Some place like Seattle which rains 99.98% of the year. What the hell am I saying?! If I WAS in Seattle I`d probably kill myself.

[updated 2/20/2002]

Artist - Sylver "In Your Eyes"

My best friend (Bruin96) just came back from his med internship to spend his vacation here in the Bay. He`s my best friend `cause he let me copy his homework while we were in Chinese school. Then again, maybe I shouldn`t have copied off of him because they were all the wrong answers. Needless to say, we didn`t do so well. What can you expect from going to Chinese classes on Sat morning. There`s only so much attention you can sacrifice, and forsaking my Sat morning cartoons was not one of them. I can`t deny the good times we had though. Playing cards, reading comic books, shooting hoops... yeah, this was all during class time. As you can see, the teachers basically gave up all hope and let us do whatever we wanted. We were the Bart and Milhouse of Chinese school. (I`m Bart) It`s amazing how well we turned out despite our delinquent childhoods. I`m an Electrical Engineer and he`s a doctor. Just don`t ask us to fix your computer or diagnose any diseases and you`ll be safe. Only in America!

[updated 2/18/2002]

Artist - Ja Rule "Always On Time"

To be or not to be

The Lottery has just hit $190 million in Cali where the odds of winning is somewhere around 1 and 50 billion. The odds of me getting a date is close to that but on this Sat night I hit all 6 digits. Can it be? The self-deprecating, Asian Charlie Brown lookalike actually has a date? Hell hath frozen over my friends and I’m making snowcones. How did this happen? Only one way. At a club where I’m intoxicated and I don’t know what the hell I’m saying or who I’m hitting on. A week ago at Club Bas, in the midst of drinking and dancing uncontrollably, I managed to find the time to wrangle information from a fellow female partygoer. We socialized a bit (let’s call her CC to keep her name anonymous in case she decides to sue me later) and I gave her my business card. I didn’t think she’d contact me later in theweek but I guess I was charming enough for her to do so. I shall now pay homage to the wonder that is the alcoholic beverage. Who invented this stuff? I must bow down before thee. Seriously,whenever I drink I somehow transform from dull Clark Kent to dashing superhero Hugh Hefner… heh heh.

I know you’re just wetting your pants for this dating masterpiece. Butfirst we must delve into my background and determine the origins of my Charlie Brown ways. It is fairly simple really. Combine only child, overprotective Asian parenting, schooling at an all boys Jesuit hs, and you have the makings of a socially backward individual. Now surround that person with geeky a$$ friends whose idea of fun is rolling 20 on a D&D game and you have your hands a perfectly conditioned f-ck up. For only $99.99, you too can have this detailed recipe for success. Please send check or money order to: 911 Killing Me Softly Lane, P.O Box 91111, Whyme, CA. Onward to dating glory…

Mission: date with female Execution: dinner, coffee, conversation… and hopefully not screwing up Result: ???

First and second impressions

This will be my second time meeting CC but in all actuality it will be my first. The problem with meeting ppl while intoxicated is that you have trouble remembering what they look like or what was said.

Note to self: bring camera to club

While getting ready I figured it’s a good thing to show up with something in hand. I bought a flower (a single elegant rose) and made some music CDs (a collection of different mp3 genres). I’m dressed and ready to go…so far so good. I call her up to tell her I’m coming but she doesn’t pick up. Ominous thoughts run through my head but I start to drive to her place anyways. She lives in SF about 45min away from me, but while driving it starts raining like crazy which slows traffic to a crawl. Is this an omen for what’s to come? Stuck in traffic,I hear my cell phone ring. It’s her! Seems she was in the shower when I called before. I explain that I might be a little late because of the weather and she’s very understanding. I feel better. There are dark clouds outside but the inner ones have cleared up. By the time I get to her place, the rain has waned to sprinkles.

She’s dressed conservatively which is understandable because it’s chilly and rainy outside. Her face is how I remembered it from before (thank God)… cute, oval shaped, bambi eyes. CC thanks me for the flower and CDs, we make light conversation, and we speed off to the restaurant. I pick this seafood joint called the Neptune, located on the piers of SF which over looks the entire bay. At night you can see the lights of the Bay Bridge and the surround boats making their way beneath it. CC likes the ambiance and comments on my good taste. I feel like Superman… I mean Hugh Hefner. While talking to her she’s a bit reserved but then we do 20 questions to each other and the conversation starts to heat up. She even starts laughing at my jokes. I think it’s the wine.

By the time dinner ends, the weather has cleared up and the stars are out. I take her hand and we head outto a coffee place nearby. At this point the conversation slows a bit and we stop to enjoy the moment. I’m not sure if this is a good or bad thing. I’m not the world’s greatest conversationalist and I prefer women who are more outgoing and can bring the conversation out of me. It’s a fault of mine that I’ve been trying to work on. CC admits to me that she’s also a bit of a reserved/quiet type of person so I’m not sure if we’re suited for each other. Overall though we did have a good time. After coffee, I drop her off at her place. We hug and make promises to see each other again. It’s hard for me to make any judgements after just one date so I won’t. It’ll take a few more outings in order for me to truly know whether I like her or not. For a first date, I give this a “B”. That’s not too bad for Charlie Brown is it.

[updated 2/14/2002]

Artist - X-ecutioners "Dramacide"

Ah yes, Valentines... the day couples show their love for one another. Contrary to popular belief, card companies did not invent this holiday out of the blue. It`s been around for ages in fact. St. Valentine`s Day began with a pagan fertility festival, Lupercal, held on Feb. 15. In 496, Pop Gelasius created a feast day in memory of St. Valentine, a martyred third-century priest, and placed it on Feb. 14, hoping early Christians would celebrate their romantic traditions a day early and dedicate them to the saint instead of the Roman love goddess, Juno. The feast day stuck, but the romantic holiday didn`t. The idea of the romantic event would come hundreds of years later. King Henry VIII would make Valentine`s Day a national holiday. Love tokens were given on the feast day, almost always anonymously. Fast forwarding to the modern era, card companies in search of a buck would adopt the holiday to sell sappy couples chocolates and cheesy one liners in folded pieces of paper.

What did I do for Valentine`s Day? Watch the Charlie Brown Valentine Special of course. Poor Charlie Brown can never get a date... damn, this story sounds strangely familiar...

[updated 2/12/2002]

Artist - Remy Shand "Take A Message"

Happy New Year!! I`m not really a superstitious person, but the zodiac signs have a certain sway over me. I`m the year of the tiger and supposedly tigers get along with horses and dogs. So far that`s been true for me... I`ve gotten along famously with women who happen to be horses or dogs (bi`tches)... hmm, that doesn`t sound too good does it...haha. Whatever the case, this year is supposed to be good for my love life... then again beggers can`t be choosers... if you`re female and have a pulse, I`m your man!

Now that I think about it, this week is kind of significant for yearly holidays. Today is the Asian New Year, tomorrow is my b-day, and Thurs is Valentines. Not that I give a rat`s a$$ about any of them, HA!

New Years? I haven`t got any red envelopes with money in them since I was a kid. For those of you that still do... you f-cking losers should be ashamed for taking your parent`s money. Don`t mind me, I`m just bitter. This one time, a relative of mine gave me an envelope with a dollar in it. What the f-ck am I gonna do with a buck? Forget that 10-10-220 sh`it, I`m not gonna be calling you. There`s a sip of beer with my name on it.

B-days? Somehow, they`ve lost their luster ever since I stopped getting gifts for being a darling, mischievious kid. Wait, I lied. The shine started coming back when my friends decided it would be fun getting sh`it-faced drunk on b-days. I`m a hypocrite that way. I don`t necessarily like it when I get drunk, but I sure do have fun trying to get my friends wasted when it`s their turn.

Valentines? Stick a fork in me, I`m done. The two times I`ve celebrated this holiday with my past girlfriends were forgettable experiences at best. Take last year for example. I take my girlfriend out to this nice resort in wine country, Napa Valley, for the weekend. Once there, however, she doesn`t seem to acknowledge all the effort I went through and we end up bickering.

Sidenote: Why the hell do couples always fight when they are on vacation? It`s a f-cking waste of time. The last thing I want to do while I`m on vacation is to get into an argument. I just want to chill, relax, and have sex.

Back to the story. We get to beautiful Napa Valley, and all my girlfriend wants to do is read a magazine. WTF! I didn`t just drive 3 and 1/2 hours to a romantic place and have you read a magazine. Hell no (ghetto style)!! I end up feeling unappreciated, she doesn`t think it`s a big deal, and I end up the bad guy. Our relationship didn`t last long after that. Thus ends another happy Valentines story... awww, how sweet.... *blam* (shoots cupid in the head).

[updated 2/10/2002]

Artist - X-ecutioners feat Linkin Park "It`s Going Down"

Good times, good times

Time had no meaning. Tilting between reality and the surreal, it was hard trying to remember my own name let alone try to put one foot in front of the other. That`s what happens when you break your own record for receiving mast quantities of alcohol and getting wasted. My b-day is coming up so my friends consider it a rite of passage. Whoever thought of the idea of getting the birthday victim drunk so that he pukes all over himself needs to die! I used to remember the good o` days when birthdays consisted of going to Chuck E Cheese, stuffing yourself with pizza, and getting handed a bag full of tokens for video games. Good times, good times. Now that I`m older it`s been regulated to getting retardedly drunk at some bar or club, and hoping that your a$$ doesn`t get reamed in some dark alley later on. Ah yes... good times, good times. Here`s the setting for this past Sat nite:

Location: Club Bas in San Francisco My mission: To hold onto reality and remember my own name Friend`s mission: Get me wasted and have me violated in some dark alley My mission #2:Try to talk to some women Friend`s mission #2: Get me drunk so that I end up hitting on some transvestite (this is SF, the probability of him-hers at a club are high)

I know for a fact that I`ll be taking 6 shots at least since that`s how many of my friends are going. Unfortunately I failed to calculate the friends of friends factor. Yeah, at the club I`d be meeting up with one of my friends, but she would end up bringing a few of her own friends that I`ve never met before. Now, I end up taking extra shots with them. Damn! My limit for drinks tops off around 7 or 8 (yes, I`m a lightweight), but I end up taking 10 overall. My only defense is to try and dance it off. I become the dancing fool, a court jester if you will. Hey, if it means puking over myself or dancing, I pick dancing any day. Plus, I consider myself a fairly competent dancer (I watch alot of MTV) so it wasn`t that bad. Then again, I was wasted so I don`t know if I had any rhythm or not. I could have been moving like Elaine from Seinfeld and I wouldn`t have a clue. Well, in the end my idea of dancing pays off. I`m able to forgo the porcelain god and protect my a$$ (literally) from any dark corners.

Only problem is that a goodfriend of mine is going to be visiting next weekend, and this process will most likely repeat itself. The a$$ is a sensitive area and it must be protected at all costs! Wish me luck.

[updated 2/5/2002]

Artist - TMF "2001 Countdown"

Any Given Sunday

Don`t you just love the underdog? The ugly duckling, the neglected younger sibling, the guy who gets picked last for kickball, the shy dude with a cowlick who gets turned down for a date. What a comeback! The Patriots, seemingly underdogs, a team supposed to lose, defies all odds and beats a so called superior opponent on sheer guts, will power, and determination. One of the greatest upsets in Super Bowl history occured Sunday. You got to admire the Patriotsfor their play, it was beautiful to watch. That`s all you really ask for in game like that... smash mouth football, translating into a gut wrenching last second win as time expires. Makes you wonder how underdogs can translate into real life situations. Imagine the possibilities.

Scene: Upscale club in downtown San Francisco

After spotting a cute girl at the bar trying to get a drink.

Me (with cowlick) : It`s pretty crowded in here. Mind if I buy you a drink.

cute girl: Sure! Afterwards how bout you and me hit the dance floor later?

Woowee! In the background the Rocky Theme begins to play in my head.

Or how bout:

Me (with 80s haircut) : It`s pretty crowded in here. Mind if I buy you a drink.

cute girl: Only if we get naked.

Yowza! Okay, okay I`m fantasizing right now...oh yeah.... oooh that`s hot... whew... yup, still fantasizing... ah yeah... oooh... whoa baby... damn, it`s getting warm in here....

[updated 1/31/2002]

Artist - primitive radio gods "standing outside a broken telephone booth"

The trumpets sound, hear the booming bass of drums` call to battle, feel the spectacle, a barbarian walks the earth once again.... Conan Lives!

Conan Script in the Works

Arnold will be back ... as Conan. Scifi.com reports that Arnold Schwarzenegger and writer/director John Milius have been discussing "King Conan," a third film based on Robert E. Howard (and Marvel Comics`) barbarian.

Finally! A new Conan movie has been put in motion. Crom! The first Barbarian movie displayed what true fantasy genres should be about... a true display of Schwarzenegger`s skill. I can`t wait for the next installment to rollout... thank God the next one will have a script by Milius as well. Since I`m such a movie nut I usually watch alot of my favorite flicks multiple times. The most watched movie I`ve seen is probably Star Wars... I think I`ve watched it 20+ times, most of those when I was a kid.

Top 5 Arnie movies:

1. Conan the Barbarian, # of Viewings: 15+ 2. The Terminator, # of Viewings: 15+ 3. T2, # of Viewings: 10+ 4. Predator, # ofViewings: 15+ 5. Total Recall, # of Viewings: 10+

Top Arnie Lines:

1. "Crom, I have never prayed to you before. I have no tongue for it. No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. No. All that matters is that two stood against many, that`s what`s important. Battle pleases you Crom, so grant me one request. Grant me revenge! And if you do not listen, then to HELL with you!" (afterwards he slaughters an entire army of evil minions, in "Conan the Barbarian") 2. "I let him go" (after he drops one of the bad guys off a cliff, in "Commando") 3. "He`s dead tired" (after he kills a bad guy on an airplane, in "Commando") 4. "I`ll be back" (afterwards he drives car into police station, in "Terminator") 5. "You are one ugly mother f-cker" (afterwards he gets his a$$ kicked by Predator but has the last laugh, killing him in the end, in "Predator") 6. "Asta la vista baby" (afterwards he shoots liquid terminator in the head, in "T2")

[updated 1/29/2002]

Artist - Ayla "Alya Part II"

A cold wind blew through the Sierra mountains bringing fresh flakes to the treetops and slopes. Perfect conditions for boarding.

Location: Heavenly, Tahoe Mission: Big Air Result: Face plants

That`s what happens when you take double black diamond runs at full speed. Luckily I landed on my head so the damage wasn`t too bad. A group of mutual friens of ours rented a cabin up at Tahoe over the weekend. The cabin itself was an MTV cribs style place. Four bathrooms, 7 bedrooms, jacuzzi, and outdoor hot tub. The kind of place I wouldn`t mind owning if I ever hit that multimillionaire status... so in other words never. Met a couple new ppl while there. One of the guys supposedly is this CEO type offellow who would be holding a singles party on Valentines. Cute women would be present so of course I volunteered my services immediately. I`ll believe it when I see it though. Something tells me it`ll probably be a sausage fest. Hell, if I knew a bunch of cute women why would I invite them to a party with a bunch of other single guys... I`d just invite them to my place.. heh heh.

[updated 1/22/2002]

Artist - Mint Royal "Don`t Falter"

Ta`varen

A ta`varen as defined by Robert Jordan in his fantasy series "TheWheelof Time" is a person who weaves all surrounding life-threads, perhaps all life-threads,to form a Web of Destiny. In his books, a ta`varen`s every action has a consequence that shapes the world in which they live in. In our world a ta`varen can be seen in our political system, the president of the United States would be a good example. His every decision has a defining effect on our way of life as a citizen of this country. However, I think that everyone can be a ta`varen in his/her own way. Our every action can have a profound on someone else whether we know it or not. I could be driving in traffic, give someone the bird and piss him off. He in turn goes home angry and takes it out on his kid. His kid feels wronged, runs away from home and is never to be heard from again. Of course this may seem like an extreme example but the point of all this I guess is to show that we shape the lives of ppl around us more than we think. What should we do about it you ask? Well, we could be more friendly with one another, tolerant, and treat each other with more respect. So does this make you go "hmmm" or am I not making any sense here? Hmmm, now that I think about it, WHAT THE HELL AM I SAYING... not cussing at ppl in traffic is impossible to do.... hell, there are a ton of dumba$$ drivers on the highways.

What am I doing as a ta`varen: introducing ppl to the fat end of my baseball bat... oh wait that was before.... ummm, trying to be more friendly by giving ppl my goofy smile... hope it doesn`t scare em...


Artist - Ruff Ryders ft DMX "Friend of Mine"

Miscellaneous Rambings:

You know, I always thought "MTV`s Cribs" peaked with the show where Snoop Doggy Dogg showed off the studio in his house, and the camera panned from a "No Drinking, No Eating" sign to a table with a half-eaten sandwich and a tipped-over soda, but when rapper Big Boi showed off the metal pole in his living room, then explained it was there so any visiting ladies could "do their thang" ... well, that will never be topped.

Speaking of MTV, does anyone else out there think that Coral from the Real World 10 is really, really hot.... she can get in my face anytime... heh heh.

Let`s face it: The "Does Britney have fake boobs?" debate is the 21st century`s version of "Who shot JFK?"

If you were holding a class on capitalism, my life would be an essential examining point... I`m one of those voracious consumers. Sometimes I wish I could go back to the basics and not be a slave to the all encompassing capitalistic mentality. The payments on my bimmer is killing me... I never seem to have enough money anymore and I`m constantly watching what I spend. It sucks cuz everytime I step into Fry`s Electronics (like this past weekend) I always spot 3 or 4 things I want to get. Taking a line from Tyler Durden in "Fight Club"... "society teaches us to buy $hit that we don`t need". Hmmm, if there`s a Project Mayhem out there.... where do I sign up? Now punch me in the face.

I can`t believe Sylvester Stallone is going to make a Rocky 6 movie. I remember watching the first Rocky movie when I was in grade school. I`m afraid that there`ll be Rocky X when I`m like 40 years old... I can see it now, Stallone will be taking geritol in between rounds while he`s fighting a cloned version of Apollo Creed. Somebody shoot Stallone before it`s too late. While you`re at it, clone a young version of Arnuld Swartzenneger and shoot the current one... his last few movies were just sad.

Word of Advice: If you`re gonna smoke pot bring some munchies... um, like burritos and chilli... that way you`ll kill everyone else in the room and leave the rest of the weed for yourself... heh heh.

Want to laugh at drunk ppl? Take a look at these New Years 2002 Pics: NYC Pics!

[updated 1/03/2002]

Artist - Aimee Mann "Wise Up"

A Trip to Remember

Happy 2002! I just got back from NYC and I have to tell you it was one of the best trips I`ve ever had. Suffice it to say, there was plenty of alcohol to be had... not that I`m a lush or anything... that`s something reserved for my friends. ;)

Fab 4 = me, TnT, kouhe, and superman

Day 1 - We (The Fab 4) get into NYC and as we are riding in the cab, we see a light snow fall begin to drift from the heavens. It was a magnificant sight... I`ve never seen snowfall in a city before.. too bad it lasted all of 2 seconds. After that, there was nothing. No snow or rain just hellish cold wind. Anyways, we were tired from the plane trip and since our hotel was in the middle of Times Square, most of the night was spent eating the various foods and drinking at the various bars NYC had to offer. First we`d drink, then we`d go outside and eat at one of the street vendors. Man, those street vendors sure do make a mean hot dog and gyro. It seems they never close either. Amazingly as we stumble out of a bar at 4am, there seems to be another street vendor selling something. If only the Bay Area had pll working that late, I`d probably put their kids through college with my late night munchies.

Day 2 - We get up really late (2pm?) but we have enough time to hop over to the MET (Metropolitan Museam of Art). They have a great assortment of exhibits there but unfortunately we didn`t have enough time to visit them all. If you`re ever in NYC, the MET is definitely a worthwhile excursion. For dinner we meet up with my friend Sunshine and TnT`s friend Kimchee. Well, I call her Kimchee cuz she`s on the hot and spicy side.. heh heh. It was good seeing Sunshine again cuz she`s kinda my ex, but I`ll save that for another story. Later that night Kimchee takes the Fab 4 to a lounge/club called Punch. Sunshine doesn`t come along with us cuz she`s dating somebody now and her guy won`t let her go out with us... can you say insecure? We had a ton of drinks at Punch and got our groove on... hey, SOME asian guys can dance ya know... I`m speaking for myself of course...haha Afterwards we go back to the hotel and kouhe makes his acquaintance with the porcelain god. He can usually outdrink us but tonight he finally gave in. He`s never thrown up before so it was surprising to see him sick up. The virgin has now been deflowered...heh heh.
Day 3 - We visit the WTC ground zero site. It was emotional to see the devastation there but I thought it was good to pay my respects to those who lost their lives that day. Day 3 was a laid back day. At night we didn`t do much but go meet Kimchee and get our game on at a pool hall. We play a few games and then the real challenge begins. Kimchee and superman team up and play against me and TnT. Now Kimchee and superman are REALLY good players and they proceed to kick our asses. TnT and I vow that we won`t leave until we win at least one game off them. BIG MISTAKE. We proceed to lose 7 games in a row... ouch! We come close to winning a couple games but we always seem to come up short... eventually we had to leave cuz it was getting late. DAMN!Next time we will win... this I guarantee. ;)

Day 4 - We get set up to celebrate New Years at a privately rented bar. Many, many drinks flow... I have too many and I basically get drunk off my a$$. It was a struggle trying not to throw up and make a mess of myself. Yes, I do seem to remember a countdown and spilling champagne on myself. Everybody seemed to have had alot to drink because in the photos I took, everyone seems to look like an alki. By some miracle we manage to get back to the hotel and no one visits the porcelain god... amazing!

Day 5 - The Fab 4 gets ready to leave for home. But before our exit, we meet up with Kimchee, her friends, and Sunshine for some bowling. Bowling huh... go figure. I haven`t been bowling in years but I manage to break 100 twice. All that was moot though... it was just good to see Sunshine again. It was a bittersweet goodbye between her and I. When I look at her it pains me a bit cuz she`s a potential "one"... years from now I know I`ll regret letting her go. Hours later our flight leaves and the Fab 4 exhaustingly trudges back to our homes in the Bay. Hey guys, let`s do this again sometime! =)

Top 10 NYC memories:

1. The late night street food vendors. (I`m hungry!) 2. New Years Celebration ( or what I can remember of it.. heh heh) 3. Hanging out, joking, drinking with the Fab 4, exploring the city (don`t get lost again okay TnT.. hahaha) 4. Seeing Sunshine again 5. Our hostess Kimchee (she`s a hottie... too bad she has a bf... DAMMIT!) 6. Metropolitan Museam of Art (it would be really nice to steal, I mean to own some of that stuff) 7. Times Square (lotsa street food vendors.. heh) 8. The cabbies (they may drive crazy but it was convenient getting from place to place) 9. Citizens of NYC (the people get a bad rap for being rude but I felt that most of them were genuinely hospitable) 10. The chill (man, it`s cold there... next time we should go in the summer)

For some NYC pics click here: NYC Pics

Word of Advice: Have a Happy 2002!

[updated 12/26/2001]

Artist - Mellencamp & Arie "Peaceful World"

Happy Holidays! It was a good Xmas where time was spent enjoying the company of family and friends. Hopefully everyone can recognize the big picture and be thankful for what they have.

I have a feeling that 2002 will be a great year for me. For one thing, it will be the year of the horse... horses are reputed to get along great with tigers (my year). I`m not normally a stuperstitious person but for some reason in the back of my mind I have a good vibe coming from 2002. To start it off, I shall be heading to NYC for New Years with the "Fab 4". It should be a fun and memorable time and I`ll be sure to post a couple pics of my adventures during my sober moments. Hope all of you have a happy and safe New Years!

Word of Advice - Stop drinking when things look blurry.

[updated 12/16/2001]

Artist - NB Ridaz "Runaway"

I looked into her endearing eyes and she looked back peering into the depths of my soul. When I first saw her I knew I had to have her. She had the most gorgeous body and had curves in all the right places. I could hardly believe that she stood in front me at this moment and I cautiously approached her. She didn`t flinch as I neared her and she invited me to touch her. I felt the electricity flow beneath my fingers as I touched her smooth silky skin. She was a playful lil thing and soon I was sitting in her lap, playing with her buttons. One thing soon led to another. I pulled out my key and inserted it into her slot. She purred softly as I twisted my fingers forward. I wanted to see how wild she could get so I put my foot down. She roared to life. A lil later I could be seen speeding down the freeway. Banshee`s a real screamer.



Top 10 Reasons Why Men Love Their Cars:

1. Easy to Turn On 2. Does everything you tell it to 3. Never talks back 4. Only eats once a week 5. Doesn`t mind when you stay home to watch sports 6. Can take her anywhere 7. Doesn`t mind 3somes 8. Likes the same music you do 9. Low maintenance 10. Bi-sexual

[updated 12/14/2001]

Artist - Creed "Weathered"

It`s 1am and I`m still at work.... somebody shoot me please.

[updated 11/29/2001]

Artist - Missy Elliot & Genuine "Take Away"

Horizon

It was a sad day yesterday. My co-worker, office-mate, my friend Dave was laid off. In these tough economic conditions I guess I shouldn`t have been surprised that layoffs were coming. Nonetheless, I feel bad for him because he has a wife and two kids to raise. The Si Valley is an expensive place to live which makes it even harder to make ends meet. He`ll probably end up moving out of state to find a job and acceptable living conditions. Hope he finds something... he`s a good guy.

It`s my friend Steve`s b-day tomorrow. We`re going to be taking him out to dinner and drinks to commemorate his old age... he`s going to be 28. He`s the oldest out of our group of friends but I`m not far behind.... my b-day will be coming up in a few short months... I`ll be 28 as well. Man, the big 28 already. It`s not quite 30 but I can see it peeking around the horizon.

As 28 nears, I can honestly say that I`m pretty happy with the way my life is going. I got my health, a steady job, and a great group of friends who annoy the hell out of me. =) I`m content being single but I`m open to a relationship if one so happens to come my way. One of the big differences that I see between men and women when it comes to relationships is that males tend to be more ready for one. I find that women tend to hold onto more emotional baggage and let their past relationships influence them too much. Why let that happen? Everybody has a bad relationship once in awhile... why let it control you? For guys, I`d say it takes them 3-6 months for them to getover someone before they are ready to embrace something again. People say "if something happens, it happens... let relationships occur naturally." I agree with that, but at the same time I say "be open to something happening... don`t build your walls up so high that they shut you in."

Word of Advice: Ladies don`t be afraid to give out your numbers... esp to me... heh heh

[updated 11/27/2001]

Artist - Members of Mayday "10 to 1"

Movie Buffness

I`m a certified movie aficionado... well anything 1980 and above and I should know something about it. I don`t watch too many of the oldie flicks but I should just for aesthetic purposes. What can I say... I`m a product of being an only child... TV was my sibling, and I had nothing better to do. As a result of that, I proceeded to kill off a majority of my brain cells by sitting in front of the boob tube. Why do they call it the boob tube anyways? Maybe that`s why I sat in front of it all the time... I was waiting for some boobs to pop out... haha. Nowadays, I pay my respects by collecting dvd movies, watch cable, go out to theatres, and frequent Blockbusters. I watch alot of movies more than once... it`s amazing what you can pick up a 2nd or 3rd time around... lotsa subtleties that you miss. The past weekend I was able to catch "Spy Game" starring Brad Pitt and Robert Redford. It was directed by Tony Scott, the same guy who directed Will Smith in "Enemy of the State". If you watch both movies you can definitely see similarities. Scott has acertain style and some of the effects and camera angles used were the same. "Spy Game" was a good movie but it was slow in some spots... "Enemy of the State" was more action packed. I was also recently able to catch "Harry Potter". Has anyone seen "Goonies"? It was a fun lil movie directed by Chris Columbus in 1985. Columbus also directed the newly made "Harry Potter" movie. If you watched "Goonies", it was essentially a kids movie with alot of adventurous elements in it. "Harry Potter" mimics that adventuresome spirit nicely... and in my opinion elevates it to "Goonie" status. I haven`t read any "Potter" books yet but after watching the movie it makes me want to pick one up. Well, that`s a lil about me and what I like to do... have I solidified myself in the geekdom hall of fame yet? haha

Word of advice: Everyone needs a lil bit of "Goonie" in them...

[updated 11/22/2001]

Artist - American Hi-Fi "Another Perfect Day"

Happy Turkey Day everybody! Mine was aiight... I had dinner at my cousin`s house. The only prob was that it was full of old people... it was full of old traditional chinese people..... so it was quite boring. Nothing wrong with the elderly but if you gather them all in one room they start inquiring about your love life and then you get embarassed when you say you haven`t been on a date in months...hahaha. Then they start wanting to introduce you to some daughter of some aunt, who`s down the street, wanting to marry her off, and wants grandkids... scary! At this point, I`m stammering trying to make an excuse to flee the room post haste... "Sorry folks I gotta leave cuz I have to buy beer immediately, get drunk off my a$$, and basically do whatever it takes to get disowned by all of you."

On a lighter note..... I caught Friends guest staring Brad Pitt and it had to be one of the funnier eps. Pitt plays an old hs classmate of Rachael who used to be fat and he starts an "I Hate RachaelGreen" club cuz she used to make fun of him. I liked where he said, "The two things I hate...Rachel Green and Carbohydrates!" Classic line. It`ll be sad when the showis taken off the air... it`s one of the better TV comedies ever made.

Word of Advice: Carbohydrates are bad but relatives trying to set you up are worse!!!!

[updated 11/20/2001]

Artist - Dilated Peoples "Worst Comes to Worst"

One Flew Over the Coo Coo's Next

Riddle me this Batman, do most women seek complications and drama on a daily basis? Why you ask? Well here's the scene: I set up my friend TnT with a lady friend that I know semi-well... let's call her Evie. I help chaperone a meeting where we all go out for eats and then meet up later at TnT's house to socialize. Overall I thought the day went pretty well. The convesation seemed to flow and everyone got along nicely. After that, I leave it up to them to see if anything materializes.... or as we like to call it... hook up.

A few days pass, a couple weeks... I don't keep in touch with what's going on. Then one day on AIM, Evie messages me and asks if TnT is at all interested in her. I say "I have no idea, I don't keep up with his personal life". I've been pretty busy with work and haven't been talking to him much in the first place. So she ask's me to ask him whether or not he likes her. If you know the male mentality, it's kinda awkward to have one guy ask another guy he's friends with about his personal life. Guys like to keep that stuff kinda private ya know. So I tell Evie I'll try to approach him about it but I pretty much know the answer already. It's common sense that if a guy likes you HE WILL CALL YOU. If you don't hear from him it's pretty obvious what the answer is.

So it was pretty comical that when I asked TnT whether or not he liked Evie or not, he was kinda put off by my questioning. He basically stepped around the subject and gave a round about answer that I expected... "Usually people know whether or not someone is interested in them by how often they keep in contact."

Now recently, I get another message on AIM from Evie asking me what TnT's answer is. At this point I feel like I'm being given the 3rd degree in some B-type cop movie. I can sense a bit of desperation in her questioning. So I give her the answer that "I don't really know. If he likes you I'm sure he'll call you." This didn't seem to sit well with her and she proceeds to take it out on me for some reason. She says that "guys are usually scared and cowardly..... and are afraid of rejection." At this point I'm thinking... no $hit... isn't everyone afraid of rejection at some point in their lives... I don't voice this however. She then says that "I'm transparent... that I'm trying to spare her feelings and that I'm basically an a$$hole for getter her in this situation." After this, she hangs up on me and doesn't talk to me anymore.

All I can think of now is that one scene in the "Exorcist" where that woman is possessed by some demon, her head starts spinning around and vomit is coming outta her mouth. I'm just an innocent bystander in all of this. I'm fairly blunt and honest about things and if I know what people are thinking or feeling I'll tell them about it. What's amazing to me is how Evie accused guys of being "scared and fearful of rejection", when she herself was acting totally childish, desparate, fearful of what TnT thought of her. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. If you're going to make a point about something, you'll come off alot more competent when hypocrisy doesn't bite you in the a$$.

BTW, as a man gets older he grows less afraid of rejection. I guess we just don't give f-ck anymore... if you're not going to be comfortable with yourself at this point, you'll never be.

Word of Advice: Beware of setting up your friends... it could haunt you later.

[updated 11/9/2001]

Artist - DMX "Who We Be"

Do you ever have that urge to feel evil? Sometimes I do but I almost always feel badfor feeling it... does that make sense? Whyam I asking? Well, today as I came into work this morning I found out that some bastard stole my jacket. My office is so cold that I keep a jacket on my chair to use when I start getting the chills. You would think that by working at a big corporation you wouldn`t have to worry about theft. So now I`m thinking evil thoughts and I hope the person who stole my jacket cooks to death and burns up from dehydration "ya sonofabizniatch"!!!

On a side note, the use of my dream car will need to be put on hold because the security system hasn`t been installed yet. Damn, sometimes it doesn`t pay to wake up in the mornings.

[updated 11/7/2001]

Artist - Tenacious D "Wonderboy"

Okay some folks are bashing me for not updating my page on a frequent basis. Hey! You think it`s easy to come up with this thought provoking stimulus? Hell, it takes almost all my brain power to tie my shoes let alone write good crap on here....haha. Besides... I do have a life ya know... a pathetic, bore you to tears kind, but it IS a life. I revel in my mediocrity and single hood.... umm, but if you do know any single ladies... let me know aiight.... throw a dog a bone will ya!

Anyways, enough about me... let`s talk more about me. Over this past weekend a dream of mine was realized. A superficial, materialistic dream but a dream nonetheless. I`ve been savingmy pennies for the past year and I was finally able to purchase my dream car. Of course there are many more payments to come but this car is so rare, it`s a wonder that I actually possess one. I had put in an order for this car months and months ago and I was finally able to pick it up this past Sat. What kinda vehicle is this you ask? Well, all I can say is that it`s the ULTIMATE driving machine. Pics to come soon. Until then, if you look hard enough somewhere on my page you can probably figure it out.

Word of advice: Dreams do come true... even wet ones......haha.

[updated 10/25/2001]

Artist - Ben Folds "Rockin the Suburbs"

Damn, I just heard my friend Steve just got laid off. Man, this economy sux so bad... everybody seems to be losing their jobs. Me and my other friends will be taking him out for drinks this weekend to help him blow off some steam.

Speaking of stess relief, one of my loyal readers (Masks1008) asked if there were any other ways for women to relieve stress besides sports.

Watching sports is a great way to relieve stress cuz you get to cuss, yell, and scream at the TV set. I guess you could do that while watching "Friends" but it doesn`t have the same effect ya know.

Scenario:

When Ross finds out that Rachel is preggers. Holy SHIIIIIIIIIIIIEET!!!!!!!! You go boooooooooyyyyyyy@! You da MAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNN!!

Hmmm, other substitutes that are good: Driving in traffic, cursing at other drivers and giving them the bird. Yeah, that`s a favorite. Another one would be sex, but I`ve hit a dry spell on that one so I have to substitute that with spending countless hours searching the web for the perfect porn site.......hahaha.

Other more banal alternatives would include getting off my ass and going to gym, actually playing sports, or listening to some good music tunes with a good background beat.

A great juvenile stress relieverwould be to crank call your ex at the wee hours of the morning and basically try to make their life a living hell..... *sigh*.... ah yes the memories.....hahaha.

Word of advice: Other ways to relieve stress - cuss at ppl who annoy you (but be prepared to get your a$$ kicked), sex (hopefully with the opposite gender, but if not then with the same gender, or by yourself), torture your EX.

[updated 10/21/2001]

Artist - Freestylers "Here We Go"

The Fab 4

The guy version of the "Joy Luck Club", aka "The Fab 4".... me, Steve, Rich, and Tuan, all good friends hanging out on a Sat nite playing pool, chillin, having drinks in downtown SJ. Good times, good times indeed. We start around 10 and stay till closing. Afterwards, its down to Milpitas square where we fill ourselves with greasy chinese food. All during this time, jokes, insults, philosphical debates fly furiously. We`re all similar in our outlooks on life... we know exactly what we want out of it. No drama is present. A wide range of topics ensue over late nite eats. Important subject matters such as: "A religious person and an atheist attempting a relationship is doomed to failure", "Being grateful for everything we have in life", and "The perfection that is "Jennifer Love Hewitt". Good natured arguments all around... we may disagree with one another on many things but we accept who each of us are. One thing we can agree on though... the only women that we have any hope of getting into a relationship with is someone who likes geeks....haha.

[updated 10/14/2001]

Artist - Ja Rule "Livin it Up"

House party ona Sat nite? A friend of afriend would be throwing one... my friend Steve, his friend Tony. I hadn`t been to one in years... probably even longer than that. But alcohol would be present, and possibly single women... I`m there! Okay, for ppl who know me I`m not exactly a social butterfly, fluttering from one social event to the next, but in an effort to broaden my horizons I decide to go. His place is nestled in a side street, near the SJ State Campus, and has the looks of a frat house combined with an air of sophistication (is that a paradox?). Well, his house has hardwood floors okay, that to me is sophisticated...haha.

In any case, his party had that college feel to it except the ppl there were alot older and mature. Everyone was laid back and just chilling, getting to know each other. It`s refreshing to join in conversation that doesn`t border on banality. All in all a great time was had. Although, I think I had a bit too much to drink because by the end of the nite I was so tired and out of it, I forgot to ask the cute girl I was talking to for her number.. damn! Oh well, life will deal another card later on I`m sure.

Word of advice: Don`t drink so much that you forget the other person`s name. =P

[update 10/07/2001]

Artist - DMX "We Right Here"

A season to remember. There`s something about sports that makes you forget the ugliness around you and lets you cheer for somebody else. Barry Bonds hitting his 73rd homer.... unbelievable.... here`s hoping that he stays in SF.

I`ll make a broad generalization and say that most women probably don`t watch sports. That`s why I think guys deal with stress better. They at least can put their worries behind them by watching a few hours of other guys competing in some sort of sporting activity. Hmmm, just adding something to the theory of women and their PMS syndromes.

Word of advice: Want to relieve some stress? Watch and learn about sports... it`ll get your mind off of things... at least it`ll give you something to cheer about.

[update 10/2/2001]

Artist - Mystic "The Life"

Introspect

My online self and my real life self are two different ppl. Online self: I can be goofy, jokey, and be brutally honest. Real life self: more reserved, serious, mature, but more forthcoming if I know you better (or if I have a few drinks in me). If you meet me in real life, it`s going to take a lil bit of effort to get to know me. Sometimes I think I`m too mature. This and my high moral standards makes me annoyed at juvenile behaviour. Once in awhile is cool if you`re joking/goofing around. But incessant childish behaviour annoys the f*ck outta me. Whining, b*tching, and drama would also fall into this category. Ppl who constantly bring up drama aren`t comfortable with who they are. WORK ON THIS!! I also keep meeting ppl who aren`t satisfied with the way their life is going at the moment. How is this possible? You live in the USA, the best nation on the planet, one of the highest per capita grossing nations. If you own a computer, you`re in the top 1% of the world`s population. Is it possible to be this dense and not see the big picture? Be grateful DAMMIT! If you`re not happy with how your life is shaping up... DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! The US is the land of opportunity. If an immigrant can come here with less than 200 bucks in his pocket and turn it into 200,000, then you should have no problem getting where you want to go.

What ever happened to multi-tasking? I keep hearing single ppl say "I`m not ready for a relationship because I`m not established yet". NEWS FLASH! You think it`s ever going to get easier? What does "being established" mean anyways? Is it after school? After finding a job? Hell, if you can`t juggle work and a relationship now how do you expect to do this in the real world..... or even when married?

Yeah, everyone has problems and we tend to only care about ourselves. It`s easy to be selfish that way and frankly it`s the cowards way out. GROW UP! What`s the point of life if you`re only going to concentrate on yourself all the time? BORING!

Word of advice: Stop b*tching, and learn to multi-task.... oh and stop admiring yourself in the mirror. If you aren`t volunteering, helping out someway, you`re taking up space.... make way for somebody who actually deserves your life.

[updated 10/1/2001]

Artist - D12 "Fight Music"

I find it a waste of breath for ppl to write "Don`t Go To War with Afghanistan", or for them to petition Bush & the government to judiciously provide proper evidence who the evil doers are. How can ppl be this dumb? We are aren`t going to war against a country, we are going to war against terrorism. Read the newspaper for once in your life and you`ll actually see what the hell is going on. I think the government is doing a great job of moving cautiously and sorting out who the bad guys are. Why petition the govn`t to provide evidence when they are doing it as we speak. It`s going to take some time to gather all the evidence and sort everythingout. Besides all this is moot anyways... Bin Laden is our target.. not just him... every sucka terrorist. Who the hell needs evidence anyways when Bin Laden already admitted he bombed the African Embassies. 1 + 1 = 2, and Bin Laden = terrorist. The US is going after all terrorists and he just happens to be at the top of the list. It annoys the hell out of me that ppl write all these petitions and articles whining to the govn`t about what to do. These cake-eaters just like to hear the sound of their own voice. Let the gov`t do their job already and shut up!

[updated 9/21/2001]

Artist : B-1 "World Without End"

Wrote a new rap today (see below).... dedicated to those lost in the tragedies 9/11/2001... dedicated to America.... God bless everybody.

[updated 9/20/2001]

Artist - So Solid Crew "21 seconds"

My heart is beating a 1000 beats per sec... I`m high on coffee.

Tip of the day: don`t mix coffee with a 1/2 pound of sugar.

[updated 9/12/2001]

Artist - Kenna "Hell Bent"

Watching and reading about the tragedies really pisses me off. Reading some of the posts onAA, pisses me off even more. Some ppl just don`t know what the hell they`re talking about. How can anybody say "US got what it deserved" or "what goes around comes around". That is so FUKKING LAME!!!! Whether the US did any wrong doings toward another country or not, it doesn`t justify hijacking planes and killing innocent ppl. That is so utterly cowardly... if you really have a grievance, have the balls to do it on a battlefield instead of sneaking around killing innocent ppl to make a point.

[updated 9/4/2001]

Artist - 112 "Dance With Me"

This past Labor Day was pretty relaxing... letsee... Fri - hit 550 in SF, get hella buzzed. Sat - pool down 1st Street, have a few beers. Sun - hit Jillians in SF Metreon, get hella faded again... (geez this is getting monotonous). Mon - recover and sleep for a long time.

Since I have few vacations days left, I decide to take Tues and Wed off this week as well...hahahaha...suckas! jp So today I decide to go riding up in the mountains up Skyline in Oakland with my friend Rich. The trip goes up through Highway 1 and spans over a 100 miles for the entire trek. All I gotta say is WOW and OUCH! Breathtaking views of the field, mtn landscape... a spiritual experience to say the least. It was tiring riding so long in a crouched down position for so long though and my hands were killing me afterwards. Plus midway between the trip I got stung by a bee on my a$$.. okay not exactly on my a$$ but on my hip. It was hurting like motha though and it felt like my a$$ was numb...hahaha. Not very pleasant when going 90mph down the freeway, but still a worthwhile experience.

Tomorrow I think I`ll go out and buy some b-ball shoes and shoot around at the local park.

[updated 8/29/2001]

Artist - Weezer "Island in the Sun"

Embarassing moment happened today. I was working out bench-pressing 185 on my 4th set going into my 9th rep... I barely got the 9th one up when I thought what the hell, let`s go for #10. I`m halfway up #10 when I lose all my energy. Slowly the bar drifts closer and closer down to my chest. Next thing you know, I got 185 lbs sitting on my chest.... WITHOUT A SPOTTER!!!! DAMN! Now I know what a turtle feels like when he`s turned upsidedown. Only thing I could do was say "yo, can I get some help here... get this %(&%$#@ thing off ofme."

Moral of the story: work out when there are ppl around.... "Hey, can somebody get this thing off of me please???!!! Dammit... where the helll is everybody?"

[updated 8/25/2001]

The 6th "C"

Artist - Bjork "It`s Oh So Quiet"

I left out an important "C".. at least for me it is. Here`s an addition to my list below:


Cash
Computer
Car
Crib
Chick (yes, this is non-PC term.. please don`t throw things at me)


CYCLE

No, I`m not talking about a bicycle but something with an engine... VROOMY... a motorcycle. It must be the adrenaline rush and the constant brush with death that propels me to ride. Common, you know what I`m talking about... haven`t you done anything dangerous in your life? If you haven`t, then you haven`t lived IMO. The only way to truly feel alive is to know your own mortalily. I think for the most part, young ppl think they`re invincible and it takes a brush with death to put them in their place. When I ride, I don`t ride recklessly or take unnecessary chances. I just love the freedom and challenge of being constantly aware of your surroundings. Respect your life, be grateful for it... and watch out for me on the road... don`t hit me or I`ll come back and haunt your a$$... haha.

[updated 8/21/2001]

Artist - Floorkiller "Dance Floorkiller"

The 5 "C"s to life (a man`s perspective)

What are the 5 "C"s to life??? Sit back relax... I shall now enlighten you with my pathetic attempt at sounding intelligent. Okay, this one time at band camp... waitaminute, my bad... that`s from a movie. Let me start again... back in the days of college, my friends and I were sitting around pondering our goals in life when my nerdy friend Andrew sat up and said "It`s all about the 5 `C`s man." "What 5 `C`s?", I said. "I think I got that on my last grade report." "No you stupid &$#*@", Andrew replied. "The 5 `C`s to life are:"

Cash
Computer
Car
Crib
Chick (yes, this is non-PC term.. please don`t throw things at me)


WHOA@! We allsat around for awhile in amazement. If any ladies are reading this, these goals are basically what a man strives for. It doesn`t matter what order it`s completed, but usually cash, computer, and car come first. Oh yeah, and after a man gets a "chick"... cash, car, computer, and crib disappear for some reason.. hmmm, we men still have to figure out how to retain those things.

What`s fun on weekends? Being from the Cali Bay Area, I just like doing laid back kind of things... you don`thave to go out to have fun all the time. Just chillin and relaxing is a great way to spend a weekend especially after a hard week of work. I like going out asmuch as the next guy, but tha would usually entail some kind of preparation... getting ready, putting gas in the car, and driving out someplace. After stressing through traffic on the weekdays, driving out someplace again on my days off seems like a chore. If I do go out, hanging in the good company of friends would be a major part of it. Doing simple things are the most fun.

Great hangout places:

1st Street Billiards in downtown SJ. Me and my friends love playing pool and this is a great place todo that. The place has a fully stocked bar, classy atmosphere, and lots of pooltables..around 30. The place is packed on Fri/Sat nights but you don`t have to wait that long foratable, only 20-30 mins.

In the meantime you can just chill on one of their comfy sofas and have a few drinks. The food there is good too.. their buffalo wings are tasty, and their chicken nacho supreme is to die for... great with beer. =)

Dave&Busters (D&B) in Milpitas, CA. Okay, whoever came up with the idea of serving alcohol and video games in the same place is a freakin genius. This place has two huge fully stocked bars and an entire auditorium of video game andticket prize machines. Remember back in the day when you went to ChuckECheese and played that skee-ball game to win prize tickets? Well, they have that game here in all it`s old skool glory with prize tickets and everything! They also have other prize ticket machines like basketball and horse-racing where you can redeem tickets for a $2 dollar prize that you spent $20 playing. But hey, it`s the fun that counts right?

[updated 8/17/2001]

Artist - Enya "Only Time" remix version

Spiritual Event: Cruising on my bike up Mount Hamilton in the evening... looking down at the city from above... lights shining like a 1000 stars on a clear cool night.

[updated 8/15/2001]

Artist - Cold Play "Trouble"

Yeah, I like to get into trouble... sitting around all day can get boring real quick. The song above is a reflective one though... mellow, smooth, chill... terrific listening to it at the end of day... and drift off to sleep.

It`s been one of those weeks where you look forward to the weekend... but doesn`t that happen all the time.. heh. Sometimes I wonder... why must we always have to lookforward to the weekend... is that all we have left to look forward to??? Guess it depends on the job... but even if I had the greatest job in the world, I can`t imagine myself not looking forward to a weekend once in awhile. Is there more to life than a weekend? Yeah....

[updated 7/27/2001]


Artist - Wiseguys "Start the Commotion"

Planet of the Apes. Is is possible for a human to fall in love with another species? I dunno about you but I can`t imagine myself kissing someonewith more body hair than me. =P

Tip of the day: Don`t drink beer before watching a movie... you`ll fall asleep really easily.

[updated 7/23/2001]


Artist - Drunken Tiger "Happi Mexico"

Is it me, or does watching George Bush talk make you want to punch him in the face? We should all pool our tax refund money together and hire somebody to make him sound more intelligent.

Have a nice day!

[updated 7/13/2001]


Artist - Jill Scott - all her songs

Okay, so I go clubbing this past Sat at club Ibiza in Oaktown... we wait over an hour to get in, it`s packed with wall to wall ppl, I can`t wait to get myself a drink so I can get a healthy fade on, and perhaps meet some potentials. I think I`mgetting this all wrong... I know I am. There are never potentials at a club dumb a$$... the probability of meeting someone down to earth is next to nothing. It`s all one big meat market of ppl checking out other ppl.. shallow, superficial air quality reigns supreme. This is getting tired. I don`t know where to meet women who don`t put up such fronts but I do know that if I want to get a good buzz on, I shouldn`t goto a club to do so. I should just goto a bar... I`ll save on that hefty cover charge too. In the meantime I`ll be scoping out the local supermarkets.

BTW, Jurrasic Park 3 had a sucky ending but for entertainment purposes it did it`s job. Hopefully the next movie will show more dinos eating ppl. YUM!


07/12/2001

Artist - DJ Mystik "Now It`s the Time"

The above song puts me in a good mood... makes me want to stand up and dance... shake that groove thang. Life`s short... you should be in a good mood for a majority of it.

Saw Final Fantasy the other nite... an okay movie with a few flaws. The plot and dialogue was a bit cheesy, but the animation was pretty good.

Man, it`s such a nice day outside... Iwant to ride my motorcycle out on the open road and smell freedom.


7/01/2001
Artist - Everclear "Brown Eyed Girl"
Ahh, lazy sunny Sundays... such an idylic life... warm breezes on the back of your neck, basketball in the afternoon, bbqs at nite... throw me back a beer.. in the company of friends... just chillin...


6/30/2001
Artist - Blu Cantrell "Hit Em Up Style"
Want to see true love? See the movie A.I. sweet flick... 2000 yrs is a long time to wait for acceptance... now THAT is patience.


6/26/2001
Artist - Jagged Edge feat Nelly "Where the Party AT?"
I`ve been thinking and I can honestly say that I`m pretty happy with my life right now. Out of school, working at a steady job, spending time with my friends, doing my own thing,enjoying the single life. Having a sig other is nice, but singlehood has it`s ups. If I find somebody that`s cool and if I don`t that`s cool too. In the meantime, I`ll date myself and buy myself some nice things... I`ll be my own sugar daddy...haha.


6/12/2001
*sigh* another 12hr day in the rat race.. is there no end to the maze?
Lakers up 3-1! It`s ova! I`m predicting 4-2... Lakers will throw the 6ers a bone.


6/7/2001 It`s been a long time...

Artist I`m feelin right now... Alicia Keys - Fallin`

All I gotta say is that IVERSON is the man! The killer crossover is a deadly weapon. I tried doing one of his moves but I fell and twisted my ankle. DAMN!


5/10/2001 Burned anew CD! I like giving them to friends... if you ask, you might get a copy too. =)

Letter to Cleo - I Want You ToWant Me, Verticle Horizon - You`re A God Cold Play - Yellow, Uncle Kracker - Follow Me The Verve - Bittersweet Symphony, Sade - By Your Side Nelly Furtado - Fly Like A Bird, Creed - You Take Me Higher Dido - Thank You, Go Go`s - Head Over Heals Cranberries - When You`re Gone, Bon Jovi - Say It Isn`t So Josh Joplin Group - Camera One, REM - Imitations of Life American Hi Fi - Flavor of the Week, Goo Goo Dolls - Broadway Semisonic -Chemistry, Lenny Kravitz - Again


5/8/2001 Hmmm, not much has happened since my last update. Was able to goto Vegas a couple weeks ago and had a good time chilling with my friends, gambling, pigging out at the buffets, and drinking semi-vast quantities of alcoholic related beverages.. I don`t remember how many. Since then I`ve just been going through withdrawal symptoms as I lament the banality of the day to day working world. BAH! There is one upside! I was informed by my boss that I`ll be receiving a hefty raise as of May. Can you say "Mo Money, Mo Money, Mo Money"!! Money`s not everything but it does tend to relieve some of life`s ills, making it alot more comfortable to live in. Hmm, I think I`ll catch up with some old friends this weekend. Drinks will be on me. =)


4/23 Okay, it`s been a week since I updated this so sue me! Nothing exciting happens on the weekdays anyways... just the usual work, eat, go home and sleep routine...blah blah blah. The weekends are where the action hits the fan. Sat 4/21 nite, it`s my friend Eric`s b-day and my friends and I are determined to get him drunk so we head onout to SF to club NV. It`s usually called club Era, but on the 2nd to the last Sat of every month, it changes to club NV and that`s when it`s packed with Asians... and that`s when we usually go. I`m designated driver this time around but that`s okay with me.. theniteis young and I still plan on pounding a few drinks.

We get to the club just before the line gets long so it was a bit empty when we get inside. Nothing else to do but order drinks for the b-day boy.. heh heh. We start off light with a beer to wet our palates, but shots soon followed. Each of us ordered a round of shots and downed them with in a 1/2 hr period. After a few of those, we decided to wait for our other friends to show up so they could buy Eric some shots too. By that point I was starting to feel buzzed anyways, a break was a good idea. Yeah, I`m a cheap date and I suffer from that red faced Asian syndrome... 4 or 5 shots and I`ll be in happy land for a couple hrs. =)

After our other friends show up, more drinking was in order of course and at the end of the nite you can figure what happened to poor b-day boy. He was left befriending the porcelain god giving offerings of the inner lining of his stomach. Well, that`s what I heard at least cuz I lost track of him while dancing and making a fool of myself in public. Luckily, so was everyone else in the club so I don`t think anyone noticed. I was sober by the time we left so driving wasn`t a problem. The only problem we had was literally carrying Eric to the car, fumbling around looking for his house keys, waking his entire household up, carrying him to his room, and not look too embarassed doing it. Aren`t weekends great!


4/15 Happy Easter everybody! One of the best things about easter Sunday is seeing the church packed with ppl who don`t normally goto church. They may notgotochurch every weekend, but at least theymade an effort on this day to pay their respects to God. While in church, I saw something that made me smile and put my mind at ease for the future. It was during collection time and the basket was coming around for donations. I was sitting next to this woman and her son. The mother was looking for her wallet in her purse but she must have forgot it at home. Her son, who couldn`t have been more than 8 years old, saw this and pulled out his own wallet.. this loony toons wallet with a velcro strap. There`s nothing in it but 2 dollars, but he pulls it out and gives it to his mom. Wow, now that was definitely a noble act and sums up Easter just right... selfless acts of sacrifice. That type of giving spirit gives me hope for this world and it`s future outlook. I hope that older and supposedly wiser people can follow that lil kids example.


4/23/2001 Okay, it`s been a week since I updated this so sue me! Nothing exciting happens on the weekdays anyways... just the usual work, eat, go home and sleep routine...blah blah blah. The weekends are where the action hits the fan. Sat 4/21 nite, it`s my friend Eric`s b-day and my friends and I are determined to get him drunk so we head on out to SF to club NV. It`s usually called club Era, but on the 2nd to the last Sat of every month, it changes to club NV and that`s when it`s packed with Asians... and that`s when we usually go. I`m designated driver this time around but that`s okay with me.. the nite is young and I still plan on pounding a few drinks. We get to the club just before the line gets long so it was a bit empty when we get inside. Nothing else to do but order drinks for the b-day boy.. heh heh. We start off light with a beer to wet our palates, but shots soon followed. Each of us ordered a round of shots and downed them with in a 1/2 hr period. After a few of those, we decided to wait for our other friends to show up so they could buy Eric some shots too. By that point I was starting to feel buzzed anyways, a break was a good idea. Yeah, I`m a cheap date and I suffer from that red faced Asian syndrome... 4 or 5 shots and I`ll be in happy land for a couple hrs. =) After our other friends show up, more drinking was in order of course and at the end of the nite you can figure what happened to poor b-day boy. He was left befriending the porcelain god giving offerings of the inner lining of his stomach. Well, that`s what I heard at least cuz I lost track of him while dancing and making a fool of myself in public. Luckily, so was everyone else in the club so I don`t think anyone noticed. I was sober by the time we left so driving wasn`t a problem. The only problem we had was literally carrying Eric to the car, fumbling around looking for his house keys, waking his entire household up, carrying him to his room, and not look too embarassed doing it. Aren`t weekends great!


4/15/2001 Happy Easter everybody! One of the best things about easter Sunday is seeing the church packed with ppl who don`t normally goto church. They may not goto church every weekend, but at least they made an effort on this day to pay their respects to God. While in church, I saw something that made me smile and put my mind at ease for the future. It was during collection time and the basket was coming around for donations. I was sitting next to this woman and her son. The mother was looking for her wallet in her purse but she must have forgot it at home. Her son, who couldn`t have been more than 8 years old, saw this and pulled out his own wallet.. this loony toons wallet with a velcro strap. There`s nothing in it but 2 dollars, but he pulls it out and gives it to his mom. Wow, now that was definitely a noble act and sums up Easter just right... selfless acts of sacrifice. That type of giving spirit gives me hope for this world and it`s future outlook. I hope that older and supposedly wiser people can follow that lil kids example.


4/12/2001 NO! I do not want to crawl out of bed and goto work this morning! But here I am with the other lemmings sitting in my office slaving away trying to make a buck. Is there more to life than this??? Yes, and the answer is Friday`s!!!! Can`t wait until tomorrow...


4/8/2001 Nothing beats going a ride on your motorcycle at 80+ mph, 2am in the morning without a car in sight. Man, can fly...


4/5/2001 "It Nerver Rains in Nor Cali"! Sun is shining, 70 degrees at my back, all I need is a beer.... is it wise to come into work wasted? maybe it`ll help me work better..


4/4/2001 My burner died on me today..damn... *funeral pyre in background* ... gotta say some last words. No more copyrighted music mixes....ARRRRGHH! Hopefully one of my hacker friends can hook me up with a new system this weekend. Finally worked out again for the 1st time in a couple weeks...damn, it`s tough to come back when you`re out of commish for awhile. Bench 205 in a couple weeks? we`ll see...


4/3/2001 It`s a nice 75 degreesoutside and I`m stuck inside unable to enjoy it. Sometimes working really sucks, but I guess it`s better than living on the street begging for change.


4/1/2001 Ah yes! April fools day! What kind of devious tricks can I play on my friends today? =)


3/31/2001 It`s freakin Sat, 80 degrees outside, and I`m sick as hell still... stoopid a$$ cough won`t go away. So what do I do when I`m sick and drepressed? Spend money of course! Despite my weakened state, I decide to go out, soak up some sun, and go down to the local Fry`s electronics and buy myself a monster 19" monitor. I get a great deal, only 200 bucks. I go home and hook it up to my dreamcast and I`m ready for some gaming goodness. Still got that cough but no longer depressed...mission accomplished!

2/16/2000

1/22/2000

1/17/2000

1/12/2000

1/09/2000

1/07/2000

2/28

2/10

2/9