Do you know any people? I bet you do. C'mon now, I bet you know SOMEBODY. I bet you know somebody and you're afraid to admit it. Why? Why are you afraid to admit that you know someone? I wish I knew someone. I don't see why it's such a big deal that I don't know whether or not you know someone. I think that if you know somebody that I have a right to know. I mean, seriously.....you're a human being, I'm a human being, and the person you're not admitting knowing is a human being.
Wait! Maybe that's it! Maybe that person you know is NOT a human being, but in fact, an alien....and you're trying to keep his identity a secret! is that it??? C'mon, you can tell me. I mean, if that's why you're keeping a secret, I've got news for you. Something like that doesn't stay secret for very long. Someone WILL find out, and then you will know a LOT of people. Most of which you don't want to know.
Wait! Maybe that's it! Maybe the reason you're keeping the alien's identity confidential is that you don't want people to know because you will eventually have to know them. Is that it??? C'mon, it's just the two of us. You can tell me anything. Are you afraid of what will happen once you know people who know that you've been hiding an alien? You know, when they do find out that you've been hiding an alien, and that youdidn't want to tell them about it, they will get really pissed off, and throw you into a big room of people that you REALLY don't want to know.
Wait! Maybe that's it! Maybe the reason you're keeping the alien's identity to yourself is because you don't want anyone to know because you know that those unsatisfying people will put you in a big room with much less unsatisfying people! Is that it??? C'mon, be open with me. I bet you're scared of being caught and thrown into that big ugly room. Maybe it's because you know that those awful people are soooo awful that they'll do mean things to you. Maybe you're afraid of that really big guy named Pinky who will make you his male bitch.
Wait! Maybe that's it! Maybe you're hiding this alien because all the people who will find out will put you into that big nasty room with those ugly dirty people including that guy Pinky and you don't want to know him because you know that you bill become his male bitch! Is that it??? C'mon, let's stay honest. I bet that you promised the alien that you wouldn't share yourself with anyone but him....and if you reveal the alien's identity, you will be put in that room with Pinky and by no fault of your own, you will break your promise to the alien.
Wait! Maybe that's it! Maybe the alien you're keeping in secrecy is a female alien and you are making love to her constantly each night. Maybe you don't want to be separated from her and put in that big cell with Pinky because you know that Pinky will soon start to look more like your alien friend. Maybe you don't want your plan to screw up. You know, the plan to make the alien pregnant. That way she'll HAVE to stay, and that means YOU'LL have to stay and be a father to your child!
So that means that you got an alien pregnant. Do you really think that they're going to let you keep that baby??? Do you really think that those people who find out about your alien lover will be kind enough as to let you keep that baby??? If you do, I have news for you. They're going to take that baby and put it away and do all kinds of tests to it, and your alien lover will not be able to stay...she'll be sent away....and YOU will be sent away into that big room with you know who.......
Or do you know? Maybe your problem is that you are not aware of any of this, and you haven't been listening to what I have been trying to say!!! Is that it??? I'm trying to say that those people are going to find out about your alien family and completely destroy it!!!!! You're going to become Pinky's male bitch, and then when you finally get out and try to find your kid, he'll find you and kill you!!!!!!!!!!!
And do you know why he will kill you? Because you let him go through all that trouble just because you didn't want anyone to know about him, his mother, and YOU!!!!! He will unleash all his half human half alien rage onto you and completely and totally kill you! He will kill you and he will kill everyone around you. He will be so mad that he will use his alien powers to revive some of his dead victims, just so he can kill them again! And you know what??? YOU will be his first victim that he revives, kills, revives, and kills again! Just because you didn't want to share yourself with a guy named Pinky, but had to.
And you wanna know something else that you didn't know? You never knew why Pinky was in the ugly room in the first place. He was in there because he financed a lot of financiers who donated money to charities who gave money to people who worked for you! And he got caught......and Pinky wants to get even with you. And if you keep your family a secret, he WILL get even with you by making you his male bitch. And your son will remember all of this as he's tearing away your puny all human body. He'll know that you didn't want to suffer the consequences of putting Pinky in jail.
So if you don't tell them about your family, they will come and take your lover away and you will never see her again. They will take your son away because they want to do tests on him. And they will throw you into a room with Pinky who will get even with you by making you his male bitch because he financed you and your crooked friends and he got caught and you didn't. And then when you get out, your son will find you, be mad at you because you let them do all those tests on him because you tried to avoid getting caught because Pinky was in jail for financing you and your crooked friends to bring your alien lover down to Earth illegally...and HE got caught....and because of this your son will kill you forever by killing you with his human side, and reviving you with his alien side, then killing you again with his human side, and reviving you again with his alien side, etc.......you are saying that you want the best of both worlds by making your son half human, and half alien. Well, your son will SHOW you the best of both worlds by killing you forever.
So..........now that you've heard the consequences of NOT telling me whether or not you know somebody, what do you have to say for yourself?"
Man #2 says..................... Okay...............I know somebody. You.
Man #1 says................... I meant besides me.
The End!!!!!!!!