Authors Notes: Well here's part 8…woo hooo! Sorry I get excited over the simplest things, what can I say? Anyhoo that's about all that I can think to say at the moment other then enjoy! Now if you'll excuse me I have a block of fudge sitting in the fridge calling my name. Disclaimer: Ranma ½ is property of Rumiko Takahashi and is used without permission.

Letters from Nabiki part 8
A Ranma ½ fanfic by Crikit

From: n_tendo@new_world.com
Date: March 20, 1999
To: listener@new_world.com
Subject: You better make this good

All right Kuno you win…maybe. I promised myself that I wouldn't let you win, that I wouldn't make an attempt to even talk to you let alone forgive you until you explained your actions. But as you said in your last email that you wouldn't start explaining until I contacted you in some way, well here you go. I hope you're happy with this because this is all the contact that you are getting from me until you tell me just what is or was going on in your pea sized brain. Now start explaining, and your explanation better be a good one, for your sake.

Nabiki

Letters to Nabiki part 8
A Ranma ½ fanfic by Crikit

From: listener@new_world.com
Date: March 21, 1999
To: n_tendo@new_world.com
Subject: Where do I start?

Well first of all I must say that I was thoroughly surprised to see your email last night. I thought that you would continue in your stubborn ways and make me suffer…which we both know you do oh so well. And truthfully Nabiki I was ready for that, because despite what I said to you in my last email about it being my last…well I was wrong. To tell you the truth Nabiki, and that is what I intend to do from this point on, I decided soon after I sent the last email to not remain silent, figured one of us doing that was enough. Instead I decided to keep pestering you until you either broke the wall of silence or got a restraining order put on me. Hopefully that is one lie that you will be able to forgive without the need for me to think of an explanation. Now about that explanation, that is after all the reason you contacted me, so perhaps it is now time for me to produce it. Here it goes.

Why? Why did I become Listener, and why did I wait so long to tell you who I actually was? That's a good question, one that I've spent many sleepless nights pondering, and finally the answer hit me…quite literally actually it came to me shortly after being decked by Akane and Ranma. Hmmm, maybe while I think about it I should send those two a thank you gift, do you think they would enjoy a trip to Hawaii…not right now of course, I have to see how everything turns out. Oh, and it would probably be best to wait until after the wedding. And the card, well that would be rather hard to word wouldn't it? Oh sure I could use the typical Shakespeare response that I would usually give the two of them, but that would seem so wrong, instead I think that I would have to word it as follows:

'Ranma and Akane,
Thank you, a hundred no a thousand times over for the part that you played in reconciling your sister (Nabiki) and I. It wasn't until the day that you hit me that I realized what a fool I was being and so once again I thank you. As a token of my appreciation please accept this all expenses paid trip for two to Hawaii, to be redeemed on or after the day of your wedding.
Sincerely Kuno.'

I know, I know, I'm rambling now, and I probably should get to the point of this email soon, otherwise you will most likely feel the need to stop reading this all together. Well like I said in the little mock letter I was a fool, I had a chance with a girl that I was absolutely crazy about and who was fairly crazy about me and I…well I blew it. There I admitted that much, I blew it. What happened between us, that is you getting ticked at me, it was all my fault, it will always be all my fault. Years from now, say maybe at our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary you will look at me and say "you know dear, it really was all your fault!" and I'll just smile and nod. That is if you forgive me, and what we have or had advances that far. If not I'm sure what will happen because at the moment I have a one-track mind.

Okay, so we now know two things…I was a fool and it is all my fault, however we do not yet know why. It's simple really, if I take a careful look at things the answer comes very easily. I did it all for you. It's not a very strong reason I know, but let me explain it a bit more, before you make up your mind about what to do.

Listener was born on a mere whim actually. I was trying to decide on what to use as an email address, I didn't want to use something typical, something that identified me as well me. For a few moments I considered using Romeo, thought it would look really great in the member profile and pen pal section, you know something cheesy like lone Romeo seeks his Juliet, go ahead laugh, it really was quite pathetic. But then I saw something that changed my mind. It was what you put down; you wanted someone to listen to you, someone who would listen to you and provide some form of stability in what you called an abnormal life. So without a moment's hesitation I chose listener, and emailed you. It was just a chance, I didn't think that you would actually reply…but you did.

Why did you reply anyway Nabiki? It wasn't like my first email to you was anything spectacular…in fact it was rather disturbing. In my opinion at least. Anyway, you responded. I thought right away that I should tell you, reveal to you who I really was, but something stopped me. It could have been the fact that the day of your first reply you were ranting about me and how stupid I was. That's what I keep telling myself anyway, I think what really was though was the fact that I was scared.

Yes you read right, I was scared. I wasn't scared of you; I wasn't scared of Ranma or any of the others. I was scared of the fact that for the first time in years, you were actually talking to me, and I didn't want to lose that, and for some strange reason I knew that once you found out you would stop. I would go from being Listener, a guy who was really nice that you knew nothing about but liked to talk too, to Kuno. A one-time friend, Shakespeare spouting pursuer of your sister and her fiancée, a psycho, an easy target to make a quick buck off of. And I hated that, I hated myself for thinking that, my heart kept telling me to tell you, if she really is the right girl for you and if she really loves you she will look past the Kuno that she sees and see the Kuno that's been emailing her. But my mind it was telling me the opposite. It was telling me that if I told you who Listener was it would all stop the emails, even the insults it would all stop. Well you can tell which one finally won but we can also see which one was right.

You should know, that I never meant to hurt. I've said that before and I will say it again until you realize that I truly mean it. I just wanted to get things to the way they once were, you remember those times don't you? When we used to tell each other everything, our hopes, our dreams, our deepest darkest secrets…to this day I have never told anyone about your secret crush on the New Kids on the Block…that will go to my grave with me. But of course you remember all that, you told me you did.

That's another thing, you were asking me for help…me of all people. And you know what Nabiki? I liked it, and I meant it all. I wanted to help with Ranma and Akane. I wanted to help with Kasumi and your father…I still want to help with it all. I know that if we try we can make Kasumi happy and help her break free, that we can get your father the help he requires, but most of all I want to help make you happy. I'd sell my soul if I knew that would do the trick. Of course then I wouldn't able to be happy because it's sort of hard to feel joy…to fell any type of emotion without a soul, but still if it would make you happy I would sell it without a moments hesitation.

So you see what my dilemma was and you certainly know the outcome…in fact the outcome is now in your hands. I hope, no, I pray that you will find this explanation enough to find it in your heart to forgive me. If not well I understand, betraying you as I did was wrong, but please remember while you decide that everything that Listener said, everything that Listener did, it was all really me. It was all really Kuno the whole time. The feelings and thoughts that are expressed by Listener were…no are the same ones that I feel now, and no matter what you decide those feelings and thoughts will always be there.

Taachi