-BEING CONTENT-

I am now 22 and I feel like I have totally grown a lot in the past 2 years than I ever did my whole life. It's bizarre but then again... such a great feeling. To know that I'm growing up and I'm learning the differences between right and wrong, the goods, the bads, as well as the friends and foes I have encountered. Just to learn more about myself, what I'm all about, what I stand up for... what I'm worth and recognize my purpose in life. What makes me who I am, what makes me happy... and where I want to be. How to improve myself as well as maintaining the good qualities that makes me...ME. I have acknowledge my bad qualities and have turned it into just another task I need to improve and not come up with another brilliant excuse for my wrongs. I am no longer that little 16 yr old boy who feels the need to constantly defend myself, prove myself or even worse... settle for less only to regret it later on in life. I am no longer battling to find myself and only to lose it again and again. I now realize the person that I was and the person that I've become and the person that I want to be. That is what I am working towards. I am fully content with the way my life has been for the past year and have definitely learned and realized alot about myself and the people that surrounds me. Accepted the fact that I have been through alot and still came out of it with a full head of knowledge on my shoulders. The knowledge that can make me a better person and the knowledge to not to let history repeat it's self. I am utterly and completely satisfy with my life, my wife, my families and friends that I have now. I acknowledge that they were the same ones that stuck around, picked me up, and believed in me while I had doubts about my own self. I thank you for that and know that I would not be the same person as I am now without you guys because I would not have the strenght to do so. I will now take the lessons that my past have taught me, the good and the bad, and carry it with me through out life. God knows there will be a million more to learn. But I will keep on striving to be a better ME, for my ownself. Like I said I am completely satisfy with the life style that I have adopted and grown to love. And in no way will I ever choose to go back to my old ways... even though I thank you for the experiences that I have encountered. I CHOOSE this. No one will ever know my thoughts, my goals, my hopes and wishes or my past unless you were me. I hope you will grow and learn how to better yourself and stop concentrating on how you think I should better mine. Because I'm doing this or myself and no input from any one else but my loved ones... is needed. Just my wife, my family and friends. That is enough. I am truly.... HAPPY.

-One Minute-

If I could have one minute out of this world to sit back and just think, just some time to analyze my own life instead of having someone else do it for me. One minute of my own time to sit down and look over the things I've done and the things I haven't done, just one minute to redo my wrongs and acknowledge my rights. To appreciate the goods as well as the bads, for they have taught me a lil something in this path called life. Just some time to thank my loved ones and block out those who claimed to love me but through time...it has proven to be otherwise. Just a lil moment to breath, to let the negatives evaporate out of my system and to absorb what I can get out of the positives...back in. A minute to let you walk in my shoes and live my life and have you finally come to an understanding of why I do the things I do and believe the things I believe. Just a lil time for you to love me for who I am and who I am not. Some time to get myself together and know that my past will not destroy me but instead... the lessons I've learned will make me stronger. Just a moment to forgive those who have trespassed against me and to let you know that I live my life as to how I want it to be... not how you want it to be... if I can just have one minute...just one minute...