One of the great mysteries of life is what brings two strangers together to form an exclusive intimate relationship and how that initial flame can be kept alive.
There is of course the  romantic notion that we have a "soul mate," that singular person predestined for us. When we "fall in love," there is a feeling akin to spiritual ecstasy; so it is easy to see why people attribute supernatural qualities to this experience.
There are endless psychological theories as to the nature of love and marriage. A very popular theory these days is the one authored by Harville Hendrix.  He argues that we fall in love with the person who most reminds us of the significant other who denied us unconditional love early in life, most often the opposite sex parent.  Naturally, we then hope and expect that the new-found lover will provide what was missing the first time around, so that we may once again feel whole, like we did at birth.  Hendrix suggests that we have to be conscious of this natural tendency in order to avoid choosing the wrong partner or having unrealistic expectations of our present partner.
And of course there is the less than romantic scientific explanation that we have a biological imperative to procreate the species and that our mating patterns will be largely based upon predetermined genetic and sociological factors.
Personally, I believe that there is something even greater at work here.  I first started thinking about this at age 19, when I was introduced to the works of the great Christian philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard. He wrote that when two people formed a committed intimate union, a new life form emerged: the relationship itself. In other words, there were now three beings who needed love and nourishment: two human beings and the relationship. But the relationship itself commands the most reverence, because it is the fragile vessel that holds God's greatest gift: pure Love. Kierkegaard's writings left an indelible impression on me and to this day my thinking has not strayed very far from his. In most cases, I believe divorce is a very bad idea. I really do believe that when two people part, there is something very sacred and irreplaceable that dies along with the interpersonal relationship.
I am not among those who believe that the ultimate purpose of marriage is personal growth, although that is surely a

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