APARTMENT ON THE EDGE OF FOREVER
A series concept for Prime Time Adventures RPG.
Notes: These last for the next four of five paragraphs before the plot treatment begins.
This is a game of Prime Time Adventures we ran at Colorado Story Games (www.coloradostorygames.com) in May, 2008. I've included a cast of characters along with a fan intro page.
In the initial version, my wife, Hallie, played J'AIMEE, the green-skinned space-babe, as a bit of a control freak, but she said that gave her a head-ache and she wanted to change the character to be more gung-ho and overconfident than over-controlling.
Also, I got into about a half-hour long rules argument with Scott (who was acting as the producer) over the way conflicts could be set up (silly, I know, but it's all the fault of my increasingly anti-GM, pro-player-power agenda. I felt Scott was acting too much like a typical GM but no one else really agreed. Pfooey!) Not a very good showing for the first time we've gotten more than two players together for a game in months. Oh well.
Anyway, I guess it's opened my eyes to some of the shortcomings of PtA. I still think it's a great game and a step in the right direction, but I guess it's only a step and not a giant leap like I had previously assumed. I look forward to playing it again with fewer stars in my eyes.
Here's a boiled-down version of the pilot episode we played (we didn't have time to finish it, so it's a two-parter. We probably won't get around to finishing it until we play some of the other characters' spotlight episodes.)
Also, I'm changing my character's name to DR. BINDLE, because it has the associations I was looking for. It was originally GAYLORD BRANSTON. I'm keeping the GAYLORD, for reasons of continuity.
PILOT TREATMENT
The show opens with an extreme drop-pan, starting from somewhere in outer space and spiralling in on the island of Manhattan, where the Constellation High Rise sits in the middle of a whole bunch of similar high-rises.
The pan swoops down the front of the building, dropping story after story until we see a cab pulling up and DR. BINDLE climbing out. His fiancee, LUCINDA, stays inside, clutching a small, yapping dog and berating the good doctor for having the poor sense to take a job as a handyman with "his qualifications."
DR. BINDLE resigns himself to his fate and enters the building, becoming somewhat startled by the DOORMAN, who knows who he is immediately. On his way into the building, DR. BINDLE passes a STRANGE GLOWING-EYED MAN who address the DOORMAN in an inhuman tongue.
Intrigued, DR. BINDLE catches up to the man and explains that, while an expert on many languages, he was unable to place the one the STRANGE GLOWING-EYED MAN IN SHADES spoke and would like to clarify it for his own curiosity. The STRANGE GLOWING-EYED MAN IN SHADES says it is "Zindaran" and hurriedly climbs into a waiting cab.
Muttering about what is obviously a made-up language, DR. BINDLE steps into the elevator which the DOORMAN has held for him, only to discover that it has eight sides and only one button. Angrily, DR. BINDLE leaps to the conclusion that this is some kind of hoax at his expense and he steps off the elevator into a sub-basement demanding explanations.
DR. BINDLE shouts down the hallway, demanding those responsible for this outrage should show themselves. A voice from down the hallway indentifies itself as GARY PONDERSCHLOSS and asks if DR. BINDLE is the new guy. DR. BINDLE marches down the hallway, looking for trouble.
This trouble comes in the terrifying form of a slithering, pseudo-pod-waving monster which comes down the hallway at a rapid pace. DR. BINDLE cries out in terror and so does the creature. The creature bunches up against the hallway and chides DR. BINDLE for scaring it. It turns out to be GARY PONDERSCHLOSS, DR. BINDLE's fellow maintenance worker to whom he must report.
After a bit of disbeleif, DR. BINDLE grudgingly accepts that GARY is, indeed, an alien from Venus and that something supernatural or otherworldly is going on at the Constellation. Before he can pull himself together, however, MISS J'AIMEE comes out of the elevator and tosses a toolbox at him, saying there's a problem on five. The toolbox bounces painfully off DR. BINDLE's chest.
In the elevator, J'AIMEE refuses to explain much about what's going on, as she is in a bad mood and doesn't think DR. BINDLE is going to work out. She's also angry that he can't pronounce her name right (it has a psionic component.) DR. BINDLE agrees with her about being a poor choice for the job, but is both curious about his situation and desperate for work. J'AIMEE explains that pressing the button always takes you where you need to go next. The doors open on a cheap pink carpet which tapers into some prehistoric ferns in the distance. DR. BINDLE expresses some doubt over whether or not he wants to go here. J'AIMEE says it's not a matter of want, it's a matter of need and the theme music starts.
THE CREDITS SEQUENCE:
Always starts out with some torturously bad elevator music and shots of the interior of the elevator, which fade into a much more menacing drumbeat-heavy techno theme.
DR. BINDLE is shown surrounded by papers and mouldy books while an inset-image drifts across the screen showing him danging from a skyscraper with pteradactyls below.
GARY PONDERSCHLOSS is shown eating pork rinds and drinking beer while watching football as an inset image of himself shreiking like a little girl and wrapped around a pole to avoid a rat rolls past on the screen
J'AIMEE is shown meditating and floating in a skimpy "psychic preistess" type robe with an inset picture of her in her tight, push-up greasy cover-alls being sprayed in the face by some noxious chemical from a leaky sink floats by in the background
Finally, the credits zoom down the building again, only to confront us with the DOORMAN, opening the door for the camera and a P.O.V. shot of This Week's Lobby.
We rejoin the show with J'AIMEE and DR. BINDLE hacking their way through a jungle (their machetes occaisonally twanging off a floor lamp or other vine-encrusted symbol of the high rise.) DR. BINDLE explains that they've been on the fifth floor for an hour and there's no sign of the resident who called in the complaint. He's also upset about being trapped in an alien jungle in the middle of a downtown skyscraper. J'AIMEE shushes him and explains how the Constellation High Rise actually exists in several different dimensions at once.
About that time, a huge eyeball protrudes from the foliage and demands to know what took the repair crew so long. J'AIMEE is, frankly, a little short with the eyeball, but DR. BINDLE tries to rise to the occasion. The eyeball will have none of it and reveals itself to be TIAMATT, a giant multiheaded dragon with an apron and curlers.
Incredulous, DR. BINDLE asks if this resident is, in fact, the one-and-only TIAMATT, chaotic mother goddess of Babylonian mythology. TIAMATT avoids the question but then recognizes DR. BINDLE as "one of those academicky types who always ask the wrong questions." DR. BINDLE admits that he is a folklorist and that he has published a few things on Bablyonian Mythology. TIAMATT chides him for being a wastrel and a liar and demands he fix the plumbing right now.
The problem turns out to be a 10-foot ogre or cyclopse stuck in a huge waterfall. J'AIMEE pokes it with a stick, like an errant puppy and demands it leave, but DR. BINDLE assumes it's a resident as well and tries to talk it out. The talk works, and the Ogre-Monster slowly emerges. While DR. BINDLE is giving J'AIMEE an "I told you so" speech about customer service, the Ogre knocks him savagely on the head with an impromptu club.
Cut to a shot of GARY in the basement, wearing his huge baseball cap atop a mass of worried-looking tentacles. He's pretty much reading the newspaper and goofing off when a call comes in on his walkie-talkie. It's J'AIMEE. In the background, you can hear the cries of a giant creature, resembling godzilla, and whispering voices threatening to consume her soul and that of the academician she carries. J'AIMEE explains that things went south when the New Guy, DR. BINDLE, tried to talk TIAMATT's lunch (the Ogre) out of the plumbing where it was trying to hide. Now both the Ogre and TIAMATT are chasing them (with pretty much the same dietaryt intent.)
Clearly reluctant to come up there and put himself in danger, GARY hems and haws, double checking that there's no rat problem, first. Then, a call arrives via the main pneumatic tube in the sub-basement maintenance office. GARY fights with his conscience for a minute, but then see it's from MRS. GRANGER, who always has cookies. Cookies win out over certain death for GARY every time. He goes in and fiddles with the elevator and it takes him where he wants to go. He never presses that damn button.
Meanwhile, DR. BINDLE and J'AIMEE make it to the elevator just in time. With a psychic blast, she keeps TIAMATT's gnashing jaws from holding the elevator open and drags DR. BINDLE to safety. He comes to, groggy and out-of-sorts. J'AIMEE explains that they have another call even though DR. BINDLE wants to give up and go home. J'AIMEE says there's only one more job and it involves cookies. DR. BINDLE reluctantly agrees. He feels he is due a cookie, at least.
MRS. GRANGER lives on a floor heavily decorated in the art-deco style. It seems a little older than the lobby, but much more elegant. J'AIMEE and DR. BINDLE are met at the door of her apartment by GARY, who is happily eating a cookie. DR. BINDLE gets patched up by MRS. GRANGER, a sweet and doting old lady who gives him treats. DR. BINDLE carefully accepts the treats and looks out the window, only to see a 1930s version of New York outside with King Kong busily assaulting the Empire State Building. MRS. GRANGER seems fond of the Big Ape and refers to him as a good neighbor.
While waiting there, the crew receive another work order which MRS. GRANGER says was slipped under her door, earlier. It says that XORLAC, DESTROYER OF WORLDS on 13 is also having trouble with his plumbing. GARY seems happy to take the call and says XORLAC, DESTROYER OF WORLDS is an old friend of his and an over-all okay guy, as long as you use his full title.
XORLAC, DESTROYER OF WORLDS lives on the 13th floor, which is shabbier than the other floors visited so far and somewhat dark-futuristic. XORLAC, DESTROYER OF WORLDS turns out to be a twenty-something headbanger with a heavily-armored VW Bug (THE DEATHMOBILE) in his living room. He explains that the alien invasion outside has messed up his hot water. DR. BINDLE looks outside to see a full-fledged saucer attack, complete with death-rays and burning sidewalks.
GARY pats DR. BINDLE companionably on the back and suggests the use the DEATHMOBILE. He asks if "Gaylord" would like to take the gun turret and DR. BINDLE's face twists into an ugly rage. He shouts that he hates that name and starts having a flashback.
We see DR. BINDLE as an academic, talking to a fellow professor named DR. GARY. DR. GARY calls DR. BINDLE &Quot;Gaylord," which sends DR. BINDLE into a rage. DR. BINDLE ends up knocking DR. GARY (probably played by one of the same guys who does the puppeteering for GARY PONDERSCHLOSS) out of the window, along with years of invaluable research. DR. GARY says that DR. BINDLE will never work in academia again.
DR. BINDLE snaps out of it when a stray death-ray destroys the DEATHMOBILE and most of the apartment. Looking down to see he has a gun in his hand (that was pointing at GARY PONDERSCHLOSS) the good DR. BINDLE screams that no one calls him Gaylord and leaps to the window, firing willy-nilly at the invaders.
He rushes out of the building, where a version of the DOORMAN politely lets him out on to the churning, ruined streets. GARY PONDERSCHLOSS and XORLAC, DESTROYER OF WORLDS follow behind, picking alien ships out of the sky with nasty-looking ordinance. But DR. BINDLE's rage dies down quickly and they are soon surrounded by hostile alien forces pointing disintegrators at them.
The first part of the pilot ends here, in a cliff-hanger.