The week we Artsies have been waiting for all year has finally arrived. It is ARTS WEEK--our week to shine as Arts Students. It may not be as big a celebration as Mardi Gras (simply because there's far less nudity and debauchery), or on par with Christmas (because there are fewer presents and David Strangway steadfastly refused again this year to wear a big red suit), but it is at least as big as Thanksgiving, because we are surrounded with turkey: Science and Engineering weeks are before and after Arts, and we have a lot for which to be thankful--we don't have to breathe formaldehyde and poke fetal pigs, or wear silly red sweaters and worship a block of cement.
Arts Week gives us the right to collectively thumb our noses at Science, Engineering, and all those other lame faculties that really just give a student a degree with a few extra letters after the 'B', but nothing more. Personally, I like the sound of B.A. It's short, sweet and unpretentious--unlike the longer degrees such as B.Comm., B.Eng., B.SC., etc. Afterall, it is not the size of one's degree that counts, it's how one uses it. And if we choose to, we can use it well. Quite frankly, we've got a lot backing us up in Arts to warrant this attitude. For instance, when judging our lesser brethren we can conclude that other faculties pale in comparison because sociologically they failed to develop from poor conditioning vis a vis poor symbolic interaction or weak structural functionalism. Their lack of connection with the world is from a dysfunctional degree likely caused by a failure to connect properly with their education figure early on in their schooling. Historically this has been going on for a long time, which has been corroborated with recent anthropological research into the behaviour of Cro-science/engineering peoples. We always know where on the map we are, and where we are going. We can figure out easily how much it's going to cost, and whether or not it will be cost effective. On an international stage we can better relate to Artsies from other countries, and we are more politically in the know. We can not only put our findings into the correct words, but we can satisfy the basic rules of grammar at the same time. And not just in English, we can do it in French, German, Spanish, Italian, and Japanese to name a few. Heck, we can even do it in Russian. So in conclusion, philosophically, we have the moral high ground (and as a final note, we throw better bzzr gardens too).
So there you have it! We are King of the ant hill. Go out there during ARTS WEEK and snub science, egg an engineer, flip the bird at forestry, or cackle at commerce. And if anyone complains, saying that you have a bad attitude, just smile and say, "Why thank you. B.A '97!"
The Underground