Name:	Kim
Online Name:	kimmellee
Country:	USA
State:	New Hampshire
Age:	23
Your Birthday:	Jan. 5, 1976
Special Talents:	Read and write well, good with computers.
Hobbies:	Reading, computers, spending time with my family.
Where do you work?	I work at the local hospital as a health unit coordinator.
Were you working when you became pregnant? If yes, doing what?	I was working at a local card shop but only part time.
Are you in school?	Not now.
If you've graduated, what is your degree?	I have a Medical Office Assistant Certificate.
How old were you when you had your first child?	I was 19.
Did you keep? abort? give up for adoption?:	I kept him.
Was it the first time you had sex?	Nope.
Were you and the father a couple?	We had just gotten back together and he had just gone to jail (I know, great choice...) when I found out I was pregnant.
Are you still together?	I broke up with him when our son Caelan was 2 years old.
If you're not together, is the father involved? How is he involved?	The biological father never really knew what to do with Caelan. He would come and go every few months or so. I got sick of him uprooting our lives like that so I went to a lawyer about custody. When he heard from my lawyer he immediately asked if he could "just sign him off?" On December 14, 1998 my husband (the best daddy in the world) officially adopted Caelan!
Were you using protection against pregnancy? If yes, what kind?	I was on the birth control pill.
If not, was it because you were trying to get pregnant? Please explain:	N/A
Did you know how you would support the baby? Support yourself?	I knew that we would make do.
Were you using protection against STDs?	No.
How many children do you have?	Just Caelan (so far).
What are their names, ages, birthdays?	Caelan (pronounced Kay-len) Michael, four years, June 2 1995.
Was the pregnancy emotionally difficult?	It was hard with the father in jail but I had support from my mom and dad.
Was the pregnancy physically difficult? i.e. were there any medical problems?	No medical problems, but I did gain 75lbs.
What was/is the most difficult experience as a young mother?	Getting over a severe Post Partum Depression.
Was your family helpful/supportive?	My mom and dad have been extremely supportive. I am so lucky to have them in our lives. Before my husband came along, my father has been my son's strongest male influence. My mom helped me in the delivery while my dad video taped it!
Did you stay at home with your parents?	My parents never even considered having me move out. In fact, they were upset when Caelan and I did move out when he was two and a half. They missed us so much they came over every day!
Did your family help support you? The baby? Emotionally, financially, or both?	I did go on welfare and medicaid so that I wouldn't be a burden to my parents. But they bought everything for the baby, or found things through friends. I thank Heavenly father every day for my mom. After Caelan was born I went through a very deep depression that I feel I have only now started to climb out of. If it wasn't for my mother taking Caelan into her room every other night I don't think we would have survived, literally.
Do they support you now? Emotionally, financially, or both?	They are still there for me emotionally. As a matter of fact, when my husband decided to go to college to become an electrician, my parents suggested that we move in with them to save on money. We don't have to pay rent, we only pay for our food and our regular bills.
Did/do you need public assistance? How did/does that make you feel?	I think the fact that I had to use public assistance contributed to my Post Partum Depression (PPD). I knew it was for the best but it still was a blow to my pride. Even now my son is on medicaid. We could have him on my insurance, but this way we can save even more money.
Was the father's family involved with the pregnancy? Emotionally, financially, or both?	His family wasn't involved except for holiday cards from his grandparents. Recently, his step mother has been involved. She is very supportive of my decision to have my husband adopt Caelan. She came to his 4th birthday party and writes frequently. She sends money for holidays and spoils him for Christmas. She is divorced from my son's grandfather but feels like Caelan is her grandson. She is very disappointed in the biological father but knows she can't do anything about it and feels that Caelan is better off.
Did the father's family help support you? Emotionally, financially, or both?	No.
Does the child have a relationship with the paternal Grandparents?	See earlier statements.
Do you feel accepted by people your age?	Now I do. But not when we were younger.
Do you feel like you have it harder than people your own age without children?	Of course. Anyone with out children usually has more money, more opportunities, etc.
Are you happy with the decisions you have made? (Be honest. . .it's ok to feel bad, we all do sometimes)	I am not happy with choosing my son's father, but if I didn't then I wouldn't have Caelan. I really don't regret having him.
What are your personal goals? (goals for yourself as an individual not as a mother)	My goals are to have a house and family and be able to stay home with my children.
Have your goals changed since you became a parent?	No, if anything they have become stronger.
Do you feel that reaching your goals will be more difficult now that your a teen parent?	Yes, I could have saved money and gotten a house first and then started a family. But it didn't work out that way.
What would you tell a (school age) 12-18 year old girl that wanted to get pregnant?	I would say that they need to get settled in the world first. Get an education or a job that will support them both. Make sure they can afford it and that they have the support from family. When all of that happens then they can go ahead. I don't think that will happen much before the age of 25.
How do you think being a Young Mother has changed you?	I am more mature, I am less selfish, I am more compassionate, and I worry more.
How do you think society looks upon teen pregnancy?	I think they look at it as a sad situation.
Why do you think there are so many teen parents?	I think there are many things in society that need to be fixed before we can start fixing teen pregnancy. It's the same stuff that makes kids go on killing sprees. Lack of support and caring from the home and community. The world is in it for themselves. We need to start being in it for everyone, and really start doing something about it.
List 5 Pro's to being a teen Mother?	I am more compassionate, I am more mature, I have my son, I learned I can depend upon myself, I learned who my true friends are.
List 5 Con's to being a teen Mother?:	Society looked upon me as a case, not a person. I didn't get to go away to college like my peers. My son hasn't been able to be supported like he should have (financially). I haven't been able to be where I wanted to be and then start a family. I had to rely on state help.
What do you expect to get out of being a member of Young Mothers?:	friendship, compassion, and understanding.
Today's Date:	October 30, 1999.