I know I could not get up in the mornings if I did not hope that some day this disease will leave me. I truly cannot face the horrifying prospect that I will be ill for the rest of my life: it is too unjust and frightening. Yet, with my positive belief that I will, I must recover, I am still sick. Those who would say that a positive attitude is all that it takes to recover are, frankly, wrong. As important as it is to mental stability, and as it may be for its physiological effects, a positive attitude is not a miracle cure for all ailments. Nor is it an easy thing to achieve when one is beset by, for example, low blood pressure, nausea, dizziness and fatigue all at once. I have been known to get downright curt in such circumstances, and I defy the 'think positive and you'll be fine' brigade to do otherwise.
The public is so often presented with 'miracle recovery' stories that I wonder whether people's understanding of the illness experience is increasingly out of touch. Think of how familiar the line, 'Doctors told him he would never walk again!' is, and the accompanying report which details our hero's valiant contradiction of his doctors' forecast, supposedly achieved through sheer willpower alone. One almost imagines doctors are deliberately telling patients they'll never walk again to spur them on to recovery. But what of the patients for whom their doctors' opinions are correct? What of those who passionately love life and health but are denied it through illness or injury? These people, too, are doing their best, but, due to the devastating power of their disability, cannot reclaim perfect health. Not because they're not trying or aren't positive, but because some assaults on the body are too great to be overcome by the mind. Doubtless, these less fortunate indivduals, who are never destined to be the subject of a good-news story, find ways to enrich their lives despite their misfortune. They probably grow emotionally and philosophically in a way healthy people never imagine.
Here we uncover another aspect of the 'think positive' exhortation: it implies the patient is not doing so already, is not already doing their utmost to survive and prosper during this challenge. It comes from the ignorant assumption that physical illness in a person equals a lack of willpower, hopefullness or a desire for health. The fact is, illness strikes without fear or favour, that not all those who are ill want or deserve to be, and that we all try our best to live in spite of illness in whatever way we can.
I think this succinct and beautiful quote by Albert Camus typifies my experience of maintaining hope:
"I discovered during the depths of winter that there is within me an eternal summer."
