Unobtrusive.

© Tim Barker 2000

(27/2/2000) 317 words

“I’ve got this friend, you see !” She said then continued to lament at the sad demise of her pet terrapin.

“Oh, never mind Bab, I mean, perhaps it was for the best ?” Consoled her friend.

“Yeah, maybe you’re right Sal.”

The terrapin had been her pride and joy. She’d bought it after a rather messy end to a four year relationship. It was some kind of consolation and, of course, some kind of companion. She’d name him ( the shop owner had said it was male ) Derek. She thought ‘Derek’ was a plain name indicating a contented, steady, dependable kind of companion, who’d always be there when she needed him. Apart from when he’d selfishly slipped this mortal coil and joined the great aquarium in the sky.

So she’d come out shopping for a new roommate. Something which she could get attached to but would still be pretty unobtrusive in her regular, day-to-day life. After perusing the shelves of the local pet store and running all the implications of cohabiting with all God’s creatures through her mind, she eventually decided on a stick insect. The shop owner managed to persuade her to purchase a new tank purpose-built for stick insects. It included little twigs reaching between floor and stick insect heaven which the inhabitants could climb up and just think about life.

All the way home on the bus Bab was running various names through her mind, turning over the syllables soundlessly on her tongue. When she reached home she knew exactly what she’d call her stick insect. Unobtrusive. She knew it was a strange name for an insect but she thought it would sum up his presence, she was hoping he’d blend into the background. She pictured the perfect scene: her hoovering, taking a bath or maybe even exercising and there, sitting in the corner, would be her perfect man, Unobtrusive.