a friend is someone who is always at your side.
a friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of $it and your breath smells like you've been eating cat food.
a friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as a hat full of a$holes.
a friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself.
a friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your sad, sad life, a friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really think you should be raped by mad goats, then thrown to vicious dogs.
a friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much english... no, sorry that's the cleaning lady.
a friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he wants his wish of being rich to come true. now pa$ this on! if you don't, you'll never have sex ever again.