| 1985 Toyota Corolla Hatchback | Mom's old car. It met it's unfortunate end on RT. 20 and Townline Rd. on my way to work one day. I was watching an autoparts truck weave in and out of lanes because he was driving erratically. I look up and there's a red fullsize chevy van trying to make a left turn. My brakes didn't quite cut it on the wet pavement. | ||
| 1979 Pontiac Bonneville | The first car I ever bought without my parents. This car actually survived pretty well for the time I drove it. It was the first car I tried to paint. I used two gallons of bondo on it. Then once I thought it was in decent shape I decided to paint it. That was the third mistake. I got a door painted. It looked good. I painted the trunk. It also didn't look too bad. I painted a basecoat of white on the hood. Not too shabby. Then the colors. The spikes were wide at the front and came to a point about a foot and a half from the windsheild. The colors went from purple to blue to green and the blending was done very well. Good, good, good. I didn't put the black on right away because I was busy, or lazy, or something. Then I got tired of doing a good job of smoothing out my bumpers. So, I did a bad job and sprayed that make it stone stuff on the front bunper. One it looked like crap. Two it got crappier when rain washed half of it off. I painted the passenger side of the body. I let my neighbor help. Mistake number four. He let some run and I couldn't get a smooth coat in that area to save my life. That was about all the painting I got done because I had run out of black paint. Then on my way to work one day my engine started backfiring and just doing bad things. Mistake number five. I took my car into a mechanic to get it looked at. He said the points were bad. The points have a rotating center piece that connects on a point and the spark plug attached to that point fires. Unfortunately, it ran really crappy after I took it to the mechanic and since I had a job I bought a hot little number, the Celica. My aunt said she could use another car if I wasn't going to do anything with it. So, I gave it to her and her husband John said the mechanic had the cylinders firing in the wrong order. | ||
| 1988 Toyota Celica All-Track (4 Wheel Drive) GT Turbo | This car was the shit. And, unbeknownst to me and my parents was shit. The leather interior, the tinted windows, the aluminum alloy wheels, the five-speed manual transmission, the power sunroof, and the power driver's seat that gave you a hug when you inflated and adjusted everything just so. It was previously owned by a lesbian. A gift from her lesbian lover. (They could have had sex on my seats!!!) (Well, not really sex, but whatever lesbians do!!!) I was on my way to work one day. I was making a left across Rt. 44 at about 8 in the morning. I must not have been paying too much attention because I didn't even see that F-350 Commercial Box Truck. Fifty-five to sixty miles an hour later into my passenger door and after I had been catapulted across the median into a Jeep Cherokee and another car after that I came to rest in the middle of the opposing lane. Every side of my car was mashed up except for the driver's side. Anyways, in lieu of many speeding tickets and my first accident the judge decided that I didn't really need to drive for a little while. And since the insurance took care of my remaining balance on the car loan for a car that was terrible in the snow and developed some expensive problems to fix, I didn't need a job anymore. If I didn't need a job, then I didn't have to have a car. All problems solved sort of. | ||
| 1976 Chevy Van | You could tell it belonged to a biker. I came back from boot camp and decided to move on and do something with myself, unfortunately for me, this task would be much more easily accomplished if I began driving again. Yuck. That and there was a girl I wanted to start dating and a vehicle helped with that too. I had a vision. I was going to try to do a crappy job recreating the mystery machine from Scooby Doo. The van was in piss poor shape in and out and I didn't see any harm in modifying the van to my hearts content. I used gallons, and gallons of bondo and window screen. I used the window screen to patch up holes in the sheet metal. I attempted to install a large plate of highly durable plastic onto the top as a 4ft. by 5 and some ft. sunroof. It was a success. Albeit, maybe winter was a bad time to do this as driving around with a hole that large is very cold. This was the first vehicle I ever had sex in. The van met it's mechanical demise on Rt.2 driving said girl home from a date. Twenty-three year old motors in disrepair are usually on their last leg though. | ||
| 1988 Mercury Grand Marquis GS | This car was very large. This car was very good to me. For about a year that is. That would make it the record breaking vehicle as far as I am concerned. It is the first car I put a stereo system into. Two cheap tens that hit, hard. Then, it started leaking oil very bad. I drove it until I wanted to take a road trip and bought another car I deemed more reliable. | ||
| 1987 Mercury Grand Marquis Colony Park Wagon | This was my car until the title was transferred out of my name. But, mostly it just sat in the driveway. I got it at an auto auction because the price just kept on falling. It got down to a $100 bid and I couldn't help myself. When I bid, I had no clue what I was going to do with it. I was broke at the time, my friend Jeff Nero loaned me some cash. We actually were there to get him a car. While I was driving home I had a brainstorm. I'll give it to Brian...! How nice huh?... Anyways, I park it in a driveway three streets down from home and drive the rest of the way with Jeff.. I pick Brian up, drive him there, and as we are driving by I asked him what he thinks of it. He said and I quote," It's a piece of crap." So much for being a good brother. --It had grown on him though, and he said he liked it. Probably just because it was HIS now. It may have taken nearly a year, but we got the title transferred to his name eventually. He let it sit too long and it has since been towed. | ||
| 1988 Mercury Grand Marquis LS | I was so impressed with the first one that I ended up buying a total of three. This is only the second one I actually drove on a regular basis though. As mentioned above, I bought it for a road trip with said girl to New York for her birthday. A few months later I decide to let her drive. She got spooked at the combination of driving a behemoth, night time darkness, oncoming traffic, and slightly foggy windows. "Screeeeeshhhhhhh" on the passenger side. Swerve left. Swerve right. "Kkkshhhscreeeeeeeeeessshh." Slam on the brakes. It was very exciting despite the fact that I was very apprehensive about gauging the damage to my vehicle. I was pleasantly surprised to find that only the molding was scratched and scraped a bit. Very little damage for so much crash. The LS had more options and less miles, but it began running shitty after the heater core went. Because eventually the water pump started to leak something fierce. And with all that engine and all of the technological crap sitting on top of it, it was just too cumbersome to fix. Eventually, the dealer that sold me the Civic said they would take it for $50. They said they knew a guy who wanted some of the parts. | ||
| 1986 Honda Civic | I got the green animal print interior finished except for the tassels and putting my ashtray back in. I had the $1500 1600 watt stereo in and working, off of a laptop no less. The only thing it needed was another coat of paint. Crash. | ||
| 1988 Ford Taurus Wagon | Station wagon #2 for young Brian Chesney paid for by yours truly. He bought this bomb off of his buddy. His friend tried to say that the odometer hadn't rolled over... Rather than argue the point I just paid the $400. For that kind of money the point is moot. | ||
| 1989 Oldsmobile 98 Regency | Having demolished the Honda I needed another car. I was going to buy a car that I could put a hitch on anyways. This sufficed. It is the first car that didn't pass e-check. And it never did. The subframe went bad and it messed up the steering. I ended up donating it to charity. | ||
| 1985 Dodge B150 Window Van | I bought this anticipating many advances in my home improvement war. It faithfully served it's purpose and now belongs to my brother. It just used too much gas to be a daily driver. | ||
| 1986 Pontiac 6000 Stationwagon | I love this thing. It has bench seats, more cargo space than I usually need, and a friggin' roof rack. It's not bad on gas either. The engine is real complicated looking, but it is clean and not corroded. I'm not even going to try and fix anything. It is worth taking to a mechanic. My best guess is that it is a southern car. | ||
| 1989 Dodge Dakota | What can I say?... It's a truck. It's grey. To it's credit, it is useful. It is very reliable. I bought it from this guy. He is a mechanic out of his garage at home. He's great and he is relatively inexpensive. His name is Ken Brown and he lives in Mentor give him a call, he's in the white pages. | ||
| 1985 Chrysler Fifth Avenue | I bought this hunk of junk off of the deadbeat boyfriend of my sister as he was moving to Arizona without her. It was old, not in horrible condition and he needed to get rid of it. | ||
| 1989 Dodge Dynasty | Say what you will, old men sell the best cars. Really, what does a retired guy have to do besides kick back, relax, and do the things he likes while taking exceptional care of his vehicle(s). This car was really good. The body was rough, but mechanically it was in great shape. It even had a hitch with a 2" ball. It is the first car I've had stolen. I had been unhappy that I was inconvenienced. Worse, was that the theives potentially had stolen my favorite bungi cords, my best frisbee, my maps, and some relatively expensive composite fence post caps that I needed to finish my new fence. When my car was recovered, I got everything back except my maps and the bungi cords. | ||
| 1999 Ford Taurus | This sky blue four wheeled object is probably the nicest car I've owned in a long time. My G/F bought it for me from my Uncle who let it go for a very generous price. She is very good to me. She suspects I don't appreciate her. I told her she is crazy. So here it is for the people I know to see and some complete strangers who couldn't give a rat's ass. Thank you Rae. You're the best! | ||