Title: My Death
parts: one
fandom: labyrinth
Rating: oh, PG-13 for violence
Disclaimer: I don't own labyrinth, Sarah, Jareth or any of the other
characters...they belong to the glorious Jim Henson...also the song
My Death is the work of Jacques Brel, and I'm using the lyrics as
they were sung by David Bowie in Ziggy Stardust, the Motion Picture
Summary: Sarah has an accident, her thoughts and transactions before she
passes on
****************************
Sarah awoke, blinking groggily as her foggy mind took note of the way her
room resembled a disaster area...Go figure, let a few goblins and fireys
in your room and guess what happens-
Wait a minute.
"It was a dream, wasn't it?" she murmured to herself as she sat up,
shaking her head as if that could make her understand everything she
didn't. She stood quickly and crossed to her mirror. "It was a dream!" she
told her reflection, and waited almost as if she was expecting her double
to answer. With a frustrated sigh she turned and looked out the window.
Dark...it was still dark outside...the inky blackness filled the window,
or that which wasn't snowy white because of the...
Owl! Jareth! Her eyes widened in instant fear, but he just sat there, as
if he was assessing the situation, judging her, almost, and inside her
mind she could almost hear him.
/This...this is what you came back for?/ he murmured as her eyes sweeped
her room, as if he was guiding the line of her gaze, guiding it to her
textbooks and book bag. /Schoolbooks and homework? School, where no one
understands you.../ Her eyes focused on the pictures of her family on the
mirror. /A mother who's only interest is her own career, a father who
won't even talk to you, a stepmother who wants to use you as a baby sitter
merely because you're available?/ A soft chuckling in her mind. /So this
is what happens to the great heroine who defeats the goblin king...and to
think, you could have had it all.../ She frowned as this last part was
said with almost suffocating depression. Could he have really felt for
her? Could they have made it work? Suddenly, he took flight.
"Jareth, wait!" she cried out, but he didn't stop. Without thinking of
what she was doing she ran out of her room, tore down the stairs and snuck
out of the house as quietly as she could. He was flying low in the sky,
taunting her, daring her to follow. Her brow furrowed, her jaw set, she
took off after him. She defeated him once, she could handle anything now.
Across lawns, under trees, over the streets, she followed, until the
familiar scenery of the park could be seen right across the street. He
slowled, and lighted on the bridge that was visible from the road; he was
waiting for her to catch up. But how long would he wait?
She obeyed her body, let the pull of it lead her running into the street.
Unearthly bright lights in her peripheral vision. They drowned out
everything, the park, the street pavement, the dampness of after the
rain...
Time seemed to slow down and she suddenly couldn't run fast enough to beat
this slow crawl of moments.
A shrill, loud, horrid noise filling her ears completely, but she couldn't
turn fast enough to find out what it was from.
Then the force...a huge pain running through her side, she was flying or
falling or something...but the pain, the pain shot through her arms and
her legs and everywhere as she hit the street hard, feeling the crack of
her body against the slick pavement.
The screech of tires drew her back to reality, and before she could
comprehend what was going on, the car that had smashed into her was
tearing away, back into the night from where it had suddenly appeared.
She tried to speak, tried to cry, but couldn't make a sound...pain shot
through every vain and artery now and she tried not to shriek as she felt
the wetness dripping on her head and shoulder and realized that it wasn't
rainwater, but blood. Couldn't move....not her arms or legs or anything
below the waist...all she could do was turn her head back to the bright
lights of houses and try to will the people out of them with her mind.
/Help me...I'm right here.../
But no one heard. And no one came out, not even by chance. Whether they
heard the car's screeches and the sickening thud is hard to say. Maybe no
one was home, maybe they just ignored it.
Whimpering as much as her throat would allow, she turned her head back to
the park and looked with dilated eyes at the white blur that watched,
emotionless. Part of her wanted to believe he did it on purpose, but she
couldn't know for sure...
Oh, but the things she did know. She wouldn't be walking away...wouldn't
be able to get up and run home...wouldn't wake up tomorrow and sigh with
relief that it was painful but all over. Wouldn't become an actress...the
way it looked, the only thing she would be doing...was dying.
As she felt her senses start to spin random thoughts whirled thorugh her
mind, and bits of prose seemed to speak directly into her soul, whether it
was her own mind or Jareth's providing the nararation she could not tell,
for in the end, she had to admit that her own heart could be as sadistic
as his. Th e owl stood there on the bridge for a heartbeat, then slowly
morphed into Jareth, leaning against the railing as if he was waiting for
her, as if expecting her to get up and run to him so everything would be
all right.
***************
My death waits like an old roue...so confident I'll go his way...
whistle to him and the passing time...
****************
/So, it comes down to this, my friend and enemy/ she thought bleakly, not
knowing if he could hear her. She had beaten him, beaten her childhood,
but for what? He had won after all...There would be no more fairy tales,
no more balls and fairy godmothers, she had seen to that, but now there
would be no prom, no college, no acting jobs, no having a family of her
own. All of this flooded her mind, all these horrific facts that were
worse than any statistics she'd ever have to learn about gunshot wounds,
plane crashes, or car accidents...
....car accidents...
**************
My death waits like a bible truth...at the funeral of my youth
Weep loud for that and the passing time
****************
She looked at Jareth then, his delicate feather cloak losing it's volume
in the rain, something that she just knew he wouldn't have let happen if
he hadn't been distracted watching her. It was strange that even in such a
mortal setting, even when the rain droplets were pouring down his skin and
soaking his cloak and hair, he still looked other-worldly, magical.
*************
My death waits like a witch at night. As surely as our love is bright
Let's not think about the passing time.
**************
A spasm shook her then, forced her to cough and she tried to recoil when
she found that she was vomiting blood. Tears welled up in her eyes as pain
grabbed at her and she tried to clean the blood away but couldn't move her
hands to do it...
And suddenly he was there, kneeling by her side, that same unreadable
statement on his face, those same mysterious emotions in his eyes. Without
a word he took up a corner of his cloak and slowly began dabbing the blood
off of her chin and neck, and it made her horrified to see such a
beautiful, magical item be tarnished with mortal blood. She tried to
speak, but his eyes silenced her. He paused momentarily, just looking at
her, as if he was trying to tell her something with those eyes. And then
he resumed his task. It had never really occurred that much to her before
how much of her life centered around him, the idea of him. Ever since she
had read about the character of the goblin king, she had become obsessed,
trying to find a way to make him real, to make him love her, to take her
away...and why couldn't she do her part when it suddenly happened? It
seemed he had been with her forever, and his actions almost confirmed
it...he seemed so familiar with how gently to touch her!
!
and he knew to pull her hair that was damp with blood and water out of
her face because she loathed the feeling of wet hair on skin. He knew to
cover the most bloodied and torn parts with his cloak, because she would
be terrified otherwise. He just knew.
***********
But what ever lies behind the door there is nothing much to do
Angel or devil, I don't care for in front of that door, there is you...
*************
She started to think of him then...really truly think of him, what he was,
and what he meant to her, and soon visions were almost dancing in front of
her eyes, covering up the now-distant-looking park and even the real
Jareth right in front of her.
She was in the deep tunnel under the labyrinth, coming to a
harmless-looking beggar who wasn't what he seemed and knew much more than
he should have.Should she have given him something and everything would
have been all right? But what could she have surrendered? Toby, her
dreams,...herself?
****************
My death waits like a beggar blind Who sees the world through an unlit
mind
Throw him a dime for the passing time
********************
She was in the ballroom and he was staring at her...they hadn't started to
dance in that room of mirrors and silver...her was only looking at her
with those glittering orbs that were his eyes. He was magnificent looking,
but how could he not be? His hair, the lion's mane, his face, that of a
mystical predator, his body sculpted like an adonis statue, from his
covered chest to his covered,, but totally noticeable thighs and groin? If
she was so eager to grow up, why had she been so afraid to pursue the
emotions that the sight of him here had stirred in her? Why hadn't she
gone ahead with it?
*************
My death waits between your thighs Your cool fingers will close my eyes
Let's not think of that and the passing time...
*************
She was with Ludo, Hoggle, and Sir Didymus and they were dancing in her
room...it was all over, or most of it was, but somehow they had come to
her. There was no quest now, no one to battle, just fun to be had by all.
And it had been lovely...It was a shame there would be no more times like
that. Even then, though she had not let the thought register, he was
there, in his owl form, watching...only watching.
*************
My death waits to allow my friends A few good times before it ends
So let's drink to that and the passing time
*****************
Her mind shot back to the present and she realized that her head was
cradled in Jareth's lap and he was talking to her. What, she wasn't
sure...she couldn't quite make out the words, but the sound of it was
lovely. Somehow, now, she wasn't at all afraid of this incredible
creature...he had only done what he was supposed to do, after all, just as
she had. Again, the thought that all of it, her adventure and even her
entire life, had everything to do with him struck her. It didn't seem to
matter any more if he was hideously evil or genuinely good...she knew that
she couldn't go to the afterlife without him. Wouldn't go without him.
************
But what ever lies behind the door There is nothing much to do
Angel or devil, I don't care For in front of that door, there is you.
**************
This was not the way she would have chosen to end it, of course...not in
the street, in the slimy run-over leaves and rained-on pavement that
should have been hard, but now she couldn't feel it. Couldn't feel
anything...did it matter? Jareth frowned down at her, expectantly, almost,
and all she could do was look at him helplessly. /I can't understand/ she
tried desperately to speak it, but her lips refused to obey her muddled
brain.
************
My death waits there among the leaves In magicians' mysterious sleeves
Rabbits and dogs and the passing time
*************
Images seemed to revolve, colors blended together in a great mixture, and
she felt as if she was suspended in air and nothing was touching
her...except for the cold. The cold was everywhere...and then she could
hear nothing at all and she was nowhere and nothing at all. Everything was
cold and dark and she was terrified...the only feeling she could
comprehend was that she needed to vomit...no, it couldn't end like
this...not dark, not alone! /JARETH! Help me...I need you!/
Everything seemed to pause, exactly as it had when she had told her
friends across the mirror that she needed them...all of them...and now she
realized that she even needed Jareth. Jareth, who she probably loved, but
definitely needed just like she needed to live, like she needed air and
water. The realization hit her hard and by the looks of it she had forever
to contemplate on it.
And then she felt it. The soft, persistant stroking of Jareth's hand on
her cheek. Her eyes flickered open instantly in response, and his whole
frame seemed to relax. Her vision became sharper, the blurred images
melding into one, the colors going back to their rightful places...the
nausea left her and suddenly she was warm...just the right kind of warm,
like in springtime when the air is sweet and crisp, but you know it won't
get too cold. Her eyes looked up at Jareth, who's lips were moving but the
sound was all mixed together, and her ears suddenly caught up with her
eyes.
"...it won't come back all at once...you'll still have to rest for a long
time...but this is what I felt that you wanted..." he said tentatively,
his eyes questioning. She frowned, not comprehending, until her focus was
drawn to the ground. She wasn't in the street anymore, but in a garden...a
garden where delicate blossoms perfumed the air and everything was vibrant
and warm and wonderful. A smile touched her lips and she tried to sit up,
but was instead cradled against Jareth's chest, against his cloak, his
dry, warm cloak "Don't try to move, Sarah..." he whispered as he slowly
picked her up and carried her into the castle...a courtyard garden it was,
then.
*************
My death waits there among the flowers
Where the blackest shadow, blackest shadow cowers
Let's pick lilacs for the passing time
*************
Her eyes picked out stoney hallways and she felt the rhythmic stride of
Jareth's hips as he carried her up stairs and into a distant hallway. She
was tired, so tired...she needed to rest...she didn't know if she was dead
or had still to die...but at least the blood was gone.
Everything seemed warm and safe...and at least she was with Jareth. Bound
together by love bound together by hatred...whatever it was, they had to
be together, that she knew...they were two sides of the same coin, that
she was sure of...her suspicions were confirmed when he carried her into a
large bedroom and laid her gently on the bed before crawling in beside
her, his strong arms holding her until she would reach the next step,
whatever it was...All she could do was breathe in his otherearthly scent
and cuddle in his warmth. Whatever would happen would have to happen
later...for now they only had to be together.
*****************
My death waits there in a double bed
Sails of oblivion at my head
So pull up the sheets against the passing time
But what ever lies behind the door There is nothing much to do
Angel or devil, I don't care For in front of that door, there is you...
End