Amy is being harassed by someone who has been calling her and not saying anything for a year. It turns out to be Kif, who has been in love with her since they met on the Titanic but can't pluck up the courage to ask her out. Zapp finds out that Amy knows Leela and calls them up to negotiate a double date, with Leela eventually agreeing to go on half a date. On the date, in a ship orbiting a planet, Zapp tells Kif to use his chat-up lines on Amy, which don't go down too well. When Zapp's kareoke causes the whole restaurant to be evacuated, he takes control, crashing it into the planet. Meanwhile, Zoidberg molts and tries to find a new shell. Fry and Bender call to see what's happened to Amy and Leela, and find out that the ship has crashed. They fly there and manage to crash land on the planet. The planet turns out to be inhabited by gigantic Amazon women, and everyone is taken prisoner. They are taken to the Amazonian leader, a giant computer called Femputer, who wants to know why there are men on the planet. When she hears that they made fun of women's basketball, she orders them to be killed. By snu-snu, the Amazonian word for sex. Before he is snu-snued, Kif tells Amy that he loves her, and that the chat-up lines were Zapp's. Amy and Leela try to save the men. Amy dresses up as an Amazonian and rescues Kif, and Bender goes to confront the Femputer. He discovers that it is in fact being controlled by a fembot, and they take an instant liking to each other. He orders the Amazonians to free the prisoners and give him gold. The crew leave the planet. Back at PE, everyone agrees that it was the best mission ever.
Quotes:
Amy: I just wish a decent guy would call me, instead of this spl'eezball who's got me too terrified to even answer the phone.
(Her phone rings) Amy: (cheerfully) Hello?
Zapp: Kif, I'm headed to the men's room and I'll be needing an attendant, so- oh, I'm sorry, you're crying, like a woman. It's alright, I've always thought of myself as a father figure to some of my more pathetic men. Kif, old friend, let's rap. Kif: Well, I'm in love with this girl- Zapp: (laughs uproariously) Oh, that's rich! Go on.
Zapp: (piloting the palm d'orbit) She's built like a steak house, but she handles like a bistro.
Fry: I can't believe Leela and Amy aren't back yet from their half-date. I'm gonna call the restaurant. Recording on phone: The number you've dialed has crashed into a planet. Please make a note of it.
Leela: What planet is this anyway? Zapp: I dunno. This whole sector is uncharted. Kif: It is not uncharted, you lost the chart.
Fry: Goodbye, friends, I never thought it would end this way. But I'd always really hoped.
Femputer: The Amazonians will be divided into three groups. The one called Zapp will be snu-snued by the large women. He who is designated Fry will be snu-snued by the petite women. And Kif, being the most attractive male, will be snu-snued by the most attractive women of Amazonia. Then the large women! Then the petite women! Then the large women again!
Leela: Bender, maybe you can interface with the Femputer and reprogram her to let them go. Bender: Maybe you can interface with my ass. By biting it.
Zapp: We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy, and bruised.
Zoidberg: ...And that's how I got my new shell. It looks just like the shell I threw out yesterday, and I found it in the same dumpster, but this one had a live racoon inside. Slurp! Pretty good story, eh Hermes? Hermes: Stick to someone else, ya wimpy barnacle!
Seen Around the Future
Signs:
Le Palm d'Orbit
Palm d'Orbit coat check - 25c surcharge each sleeve over 9
Drollery Domicile
Amy keeps her phone in a 'CellMate'
Zoidberg gets his shells from J.Crab.
Bender's case has 'Hecho en Mexico' written inside it.
Amy is being harassed by someone who has been calling her and not saying anything for a year. It turns out to be Kif, who has been in love with her since they met on the Titanic but can't pluck up the courage to ask her out. Zapp finds out that Amy knows Leela and calls them up to negotiate a double date, with Leela eventually agreeing to go on half a date. On the date, in a ship orbiting a planet, Zapp tells Kif to use his chat-up lines on Amy, which don't go down too well. When Zapp's kareoke causes the whole restaurant to be evacuated, he takes control, crashing it into the planet. Meanwhile, Zoidberg molts and tries to find a new shell. Fry and Bender call to see what's happened to Amy and Leela, and find out that the ship has crashed. They fly there and manage to crash land on the planet. The planet turns out to be inhabited by gigantic Amazon women, and everyone is taken prisoner. They are taken to the Amazonian leader, a giant computer called Femputer, who wants to know why there are men on the planet. When she hears that they made fun of women's basketball, she orders them to be killed. By snu-snu, the Amazonian word for sex. Before he is snu-snued, Kif tells Amy that he loves her, and that the chat-up lines were Zapp's. Amy and Leela try to save the men. Amy dresses up as an Amazonian and rescues Kif, and Bender goes to confront the Femputer. He discovers that it is in fact being controlled by a fembot, and they take an instant liking to each other. He orders the Amazonians to free the prisoners and give him gold. The crew leave the planet. Back at PE, everyone agrees that it was the best mission ever.