Bender asks what would heppen if he was a human:
The Professor uses reverse fossilisation to turn Bender into a human, and he gets used to
all the advantages. He quickly starts drinking and smoking - even better when it's bad
for him - and runs away when his frieds tell him to have self control. He goes out and
parties, eating loads and loads. When the Professor presents him to the Nobel Prize
comitee, is enourmous and unable to move. He persuades the scientists to try his way of
life, and they have a party. Wornstrum presents him a Nobel Prize, but he's dead.
Fry asks what would happen if life was like a video game:
At the DOOP, Donkey Kong hits Nixon with a barrel. The Earth is attacked by Space
Invaders, lead by Lrrr, and Fry is called upon due to his experience at video games. Led
by General Pacman, the crew go through the escape tunnels to the invaders. Fry kills all
but one of the ships, which his brother always did for him. The invaders land on Earth
and demand quarters, but the crew refuse, as they need them for laundry. They agree to
let the aliens throw their laundry in with theirs.
Leela asks what would happen if she found her true home, and Professor knocks her out with the machine, making her dream that:
Leela gets lost in space, and lands on a mysterious planet, similar to, but legally destinct from, the Wizard of Oz. She kills the man-witch of the West, and takes some boots from him. She also kills Amy, the cute witch of the north. Leela follows the yellow brick road, finding Fry the scarecrow, who doesn't like Leela's suggestion that he needs a brain, Bender, who needs to pump blood out of his cellar, and Zoidberg, who wants courage. They are taken hostage by Mom, who is a witch. Leela wants to join her, and has found her true home. Unfortunately, Bender kills Mom with some Chapagne. They reach the Professor, who gives Zoidberg a gun, gives Bender some money and wants to send Leela back home. Leela says she wants to become a witch and turns everyone into frogs. Zoidberg melts her.
Quotes:
Professor: I've finished fine-tuning my 'What if?' machine. It can answer any 'what if?' question accurate to within one tenth of a plausability unit.
Leela: That's so plausable I can't believe it.
Bender: Hey, my antenna's gone! Nah, it just moved. I'm not getting good reception on it though. Maybe if I wiggle it around a little...
Fry: Bender, no! You'll make God cry!
Human Bender: Guys! Guys! You gotta come into the bathroom and look at this! You're not gonna believe it!
Leela: Bender, it's OK to be proud, but don't be a show off.
Narrator: You watched it! You can't un-watch it! Stay tuned for more - Tales! Of! Interest!
Fry: Wait a second! I know that monkey. His name is Donkey.
Professor: Monkeys aren't donkeys! Quit messing with my head!
Fry: Amy, tend to the widow pacman.
Lrrr: You are defeated! Instead of shooting where I was, you should have shot at where I was going to be. Muahahahaha!
Professor: Let's turn to the 'who ask?' machine to see who's next.
'Who ask?' machine: Uuuuhhm... Amy.
(Amy is delighted)
'Who ask?' machine: I mean Leela.
Amy: Ohhhh...
Cubert: Look everyone! She killed the man-witch of the west!
Everyone: Yay!
Leela: A witch? That explains how these boots magically appeared on my feet.
Worm-guy: No - you stole them. We saw you!
Leela: Well, it's hard to find shoes that fit me. So anyway, who are you people?
Leela: I was having the most wonderful dream. Except (points at Zoidberg) you were there, and (points at Amy) and you were there, and (points at Zoidberg) you were there.
Seen Around the Future
Signs:
O'Zorgnax's Pub - Well drinks $5, sewer drinks $2
Militari HQ
The Professor Land fun bucks say 'In fun we trust', with some alien writing in one corner that says 'TOXIC INK'.
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