Magic Crime Fighting Underwear Man

MAGIC, CRIME FIGHTING UNDERWEAR MAN
By Josh Tuttle and Glen Passman

A HERO IS BORN...

     We rejoin the story with the narrator fighting with the coffee-stain-from-hell-on-the-script...

     OKAY, WHO'S THE GIT WHO DRINKS COFFEE THEN... Aha, finally, here's the end of the coffee stain! At the age of 19, Skid moved to the city of Metroggolis to attend Burger College. The place was wonderful, full of nice green air, black oily water and litter-riddled streets.
     "Sounds a bit crap really," he remarked.
     Hey, I don't write the scripts!
     "Oh... Okay!"
     You're forgiven...

     Now where was I... Oh yes, but there was a niggling feeling in the back of his mind that he may need his magical underwear...
     "Hmm, I have a niggling feeling in..."
     Look, I've just said of that!
     "Have you?"
     Yeah, look above mate!
     "Oh, so you have! Sorry!"
     You're forgiven... again!

     Anyway... One night, Skid was walking by a cliche dark alley when he heard a terrifying scream!
     "I heard a terrifying scream!"
     Look mate, if you're going to repeat all my lines like a parrot, I may just have to hit you.
     "Sorry, won't happen again..."
     Thank you!

     Getting back to the story... Skid went to investigate. In the alley stood a woman holding a half eaten cookie and an milk carton!
     "My god, she's ran out of milk before she finished her cookie," thought Skid, before he leaped into the alley heroically shouting, "Don't worry, citizen, I shall save you!"
     "Oh great," thought the woman. "I've ran out of milk, and now I've got a nutter jumping into dark alleys behind me!"
     Skid dealved into his magic underwear and took out a cow. He then pulled out a stool and a bucket and began milking the mystified animal, who definitely remembered being in a farm moments ago.
     The woman couldn't beleive it when a basic milk processing plant came from the pants and Skid purified the milk. He even had a mini-packaging facility that put the milk in a "Marxx Milk" carton.
     "Here you go good citizen," he chanted as he handed her the milk.
     She simply stared in wide eyed wonder as Skid took to the air with a large *TRUMP!* Unfortunately, the cow, still in awe over his appearance in Metroggolis, took the brunt of Skid's anal odour and passed out on top of the woman, who dropped her half cookie down a nearby drain...

     Skid was feeling pretty good after his encounter with the dasterdly dry cookie, and decided to dedicate his life to end all misjustices and wrongs, and to making the world a better place! (God help us all)
     "OI! I heard that!"
     AHH bite...

DUE TO THE NATURE OF THE FOLLOWING SCENE BETWEEN SKID AND THE NARRATOR, IT HAS BEEN JUDGED UNSUITABLE FOR CHILDREN AND HENCE THE EDITORS HAVE TAKEN THE DECISION TO REMOVE THE NEXT TWENTY PARAGRAPHS. WE HOPE THIS DOES NOT RUIN YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE.

     "You are!"
     No, you are!
     "Well my dad can beat up your dad!!!"

OKAY, BETTER MAKE THAT THE NEXT 40 PARAGRAPHS...

     Poo head!
     "Dumb dumb!"
     Micheal Jackson fan
     "I know you are but what am I?"

AHEM, I THINK WE'D BETTER END THERE BEFORE WE GET COMPLAINTS...
Will this argument EVER end?
Will Skid create world peace?
Will we ever get an original ending?

Be here for the next installment of
Magic Crime Fighting Underwear Man!!!

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